Getting blocked for "no reason"

[Maddie82]

Maybe he was never exactly single and his significant other found out he'd been sneaking around.

 

This is exactly what i was thinking. An old childhood friend of mine got back in touch with me last year after not seeing each other for over 20 years. Everything was great and it was lovely chatting to one of my best friends again from when i was a kid. He would talk allot to my husband too. Nothing in it. One day, like you i was suddenly completely blocked on all social media and WhatsApp. Didn't hear a word for 6 months, when he came back and explained that his wife is the very jealous type and flipped out about him talking to me, so he blocked me.

 

It's quite possible this is the case here.

[nychic009]

This is exactly what i was thinking. An old childhood friend of mine got back in touch with me last year after not seeing each other for over 20 years. Everything was great and it was lovely chatting to one of my best friends again from when i was a kid. He would talk allot to my husband too. Nothing in it. One day, like you i was suddenly completely blocked on all social media and WhatsApp. Didn't hear a word for 6 months, when he came back and explained that his wife is the very jealous type and flipped out about him talking to me, so he blocked me.

 

It's quite possible this is the case here.

I highly doubt it. We have several close mutual friends from college and I double checked with them after the blocking thing, cuz I thought this too but he’s not back with his last ex. And everything was fine until Friday’s situation. If that was the case he wouldn’t have wanted me to come by Friday. He even mentioned going back to his family’s home after. His brother and his wife was also at the club.

[lana-banana]

It's someone else. When somebody comes on so strong so quickly like that, it's usually a sign of an emotional person who can attach and detach their feelings with ease. Yeah, he liked you, but someone else captured his attention just as quickly, or the one that got away came back, etc.

[nychic009]

It's someone else. When somebody comes on so strong so quickly like that, it's usually a sign of an emotional person who can attach and detach their feelings with ease. Yeah, he liked you, but someone else captured his attention just as quickly, or the one that got away came back, etc.

 

I mean anything is possible but I’m gonna chalk it up to Douchbagery since he is a D-bag if you ever met him. Don’t think he’s smart/mature/has enough self control to be calculating and plan out the block. Think he was pissed about Friday was trying to get over it and couldn’t. He’s not mature so he decided to block me instead of talking about it. Don’t think it someone else if he was trying so hard and mad about Friday.

[kendahke]

Probably not, but

 

But nothing. The answer was probably not.

 

I’d like to tell him how his actions were immature and selfish. It’ll make me feel better to talk it out and tell him off.

 

That is a Hollywood script you're trying to run on someone who will not be reading his lines or paying attention to the blocking of the shot. It will not go as you imagined, so let go of this revenge fantasy before it backfires on your feelings.

 

Write out everything you have to say to him and burn it. Anything else is you trying to machine a way to get his attention and that's lame, given your feelings over being blocked.

 

And be crystal clear on any reasons you come up with to give his friend an entre into your intimacy.

 

Don't use the friend to lash out at this dude by trying to make him jealous--that is a played-out, base female action when they're in high dudgeon over being dismissed. It's also unfair to the guy because he's just a prop in a scene you're creating for the guy you really want to be with, but who doesn't want you right now.

 

And I"m not saying he's not being childish a.f., but he's not here trying to get a magic "make her act the way I want " pill recipe.

[Maggiemay1]

I reacted like a logical person would.. asked him why he blocked me. His friend too, which I shouldn't of, but I didn't say anything besides ask why he blocked me out of nowhere. I didn't react irrationally or act emotionally.

 

He could have muted me so he doesn't see my posts or stories or unfollowed me. It's weird that he chose to BLOCK me, which is extreme. He's always the one msging me, it's not like I annoy him. So bizarre why he'd pretend like nothing was wrong all Sunday, making plans as normal when he was holding in this resentment.

 

Hopefully he will unblock me eventually.

 

Oh no that’s not logical at all, that’s emotional.

A Logical rational reaction would be that he blocked you , therefore does not want contact from you and therefore don’t contact him either directly or indirectly.

 

My take on it , is that you were sick and said you’d see him Sunday, thinking you’d be better then. But you were better before then. But didn’t actually let him know that.

You tried to play it cool , that he is out with friends and proceeded to go out with your friends. Although not so cool since you asked him who was his date?

 

Your plans were for Sunday , so why message back and forth on Saturday esp when he is out with friends and insinuating that you might see him that night but later say you won’t because you are at some guys party with his friends? It’s irrelevant that you asked him along.

 

It is odd to me that you felt the need to prove to him that you were sick by sending a pic of antibiotics because at that point you hadn’t cancelled any date with him, simply cut your holiday short.

 

You weren’t that sick, probably mild chest infection or strep throat?

Why wouldn’t you have him bring soup? Or not arrange to meet him until you feel better but let him know when you are , which would have been Saturday by the sounds of it?

 

Blocking you was possibly because he told his mates you were sick and they give him **** that you aren’t so because you are out at a party.

 

A bit of immaturity, insecurity and poor communication on both him and you.

 

He is not super into you or this would not have resulted in blocking you.

And that’s ok.

You are both young it seems and not meant to be.

 

Stop checking his Instagram.

[nychic009]

@Maggiemay1....

 

I was really sick and didn’t want him to see me that way. I couldn’t talk. I let him know Thursday I am better but he didn’t make plans with me until Sunday bc Fri we were both going to Long Island but with our own friends/had separate plans.

 

I wasn’t going to msg him Fri until I found out I may be at the same

Club. I didn’t want him to think I was stalking him. But then my friends changed plans and went to a house party instead which I invited him to.

Edited August 6, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[stillafool]

Oh no that’s not logical at all, that’s emotional.

A Logical rational reaction would be that he blocked you , therefore does not want contact from you and therefore don’t contact him either directly or indirectly.

 

 

This^^^would definitely be the logical way to react to a man blocking you. After he blocked I certainly wouldn't be checking his Instagram because at that point he no longer exists.

[Maggiemay1]

I was really sick and didn’t want him to see me that way. I couldn’t talk. I let him know Thursday I am better but he didn’t make plans with me until Sunday bc Fri we were both going to Long Island but with our own friends/had separate plans

 

You weren’t that sick. You were on a course of antibiotics , not hospitalised.

Ok so you were better on Thursday but stuck to the seperate plans of meeting friends until Sunday. So why did you try to intercept those plans?

As it happened you didn’t go to the same club , why tell him you might be there?

Wouldn’t it make more sense to only tell him if you were actually going there?

And if the place has only 2 clubs , big deal if you bumped into each other ?

If he thought that was stalking, so be it, you would be in no different position than you are in now?

 

Sounds like there was too much frivolous texting and not enough proper communication.

 

In future call , don’t text?

Edited August 6, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[nychic009]

You weren’t that sick. You were on a course of antibiotics , not hospitalised.

 

Idk why you are jumping to conclusions about how sick I was. Let’s jsut say that while I was traveling I was hospitalized, with tubes going down my throat, which is why I came back early. I didn’t want to tell someone new I was dating these details but it caused me to have a bad throat problem for days that I’m still recovering from.

 

We were planning to go to the same club so I told him, then my friends changed plans. I think it would be weirder to go to the same place and not tell him. I told him bc we chat all the time and then plans changed.

Edited August 6, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Maggiemay1]

@nychic009...

 

I’m not jumping to any conclusions about how sick you were or not.

I’m reading your post which strongly implies you were not that sick since you were out partying within a week but apparently still recovering?

Admitted to hospital or attended to an emergency dept? Two very different scenarios.

Edited August 6, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[nychic009]

@Maggiemay1....

 

It’s one thing to go to a house party with your best friend and ppl you don’t know while recovering. Another to meet a guy you’re dating and all his friends and family. It’s stressful

Edited August 6, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Beendaredonedat]

I reacted like a logical person would.. asked him why he blocked me. His friend too, which I shouldn't of, but I didn't say anything besides ask why he blocked me out of nowhere. I didn't react irrationally or act emotionally...

 

Well, I know men who temporarily block because they don't want the women they have on rotation knowing that they are online and ignoring them. So they block who they are sure they have locked in while they chat with the next chick they are pursuing... Once they have that chick locked in, they will unblock you and then block the other one and shelve her for a while.

 

Personally, I am sad that you are hopeful that he will unblock you. You should take back your personal power from him and next him if he would be so immature and non communicative. You don't give d-bags like him a second chance because more times than not, you're not a priority to him.

 

Chances are he met someone at the club and he was schmoozing her and blocked you so you wouldn't know he was online with her.

Edited August 6, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[nychic009]

@Beendaredonedat....

 

Yeah. I know you guys are right. New goal is to stop thinking about this entirely starting today

Edited August 6, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Versacehottie]

Probably not, but I’d like to tell him how his actions were immature and selfish. It’ll make me feel better to talk it out and tell him off.

 

Ohhhh I wouldn't do that. You see, when he wants to talk to you, is when you would TELL him your hesitation, i.e. that blocking you was immature and reactive. If you want to tell him off and reach out to him to do so, that's essentially you being immature and selfish and accomplishes nothing. Also in a negotiation, you are in a weak position if you go chasing after the person first, it belies that really YOU are are the one that wants something, which let's be honest is exactly what would be going on if you did this. You would want that he said something that makes you feel better, apologized, begged you back or that you would have the satisfaction that telling him off hurt him in retaliation for you being hurt right now.

 

I think on the way that you have conveyed mostly that you have your own stuff going on and that he needs to raise his level as a person to be in your life---you only get that if you follow the theme the whole way through, i.e. you act maturely and as the person you want to be and like you are too good/with too many options/and too good a life for this drama and games. Act it until you can be it. It's not games to not let someone drag you into their toxicity. It's summertime, life is fun, enjoy it. Don't waste time on this.

[Versacehottie]

Yeah. I know you guys are right. New goal is to stop thinking about this entirely starting today ?

 

Yeah, I agree^^^ try not to react to him emotionally which is what any contact from your end would be and don't look at his social media, it will just make you feel emotional, good or bad.

 

I do agree it was kinda beta type stuff from him now that i know the additional details about his friend. Would you ever like the friend? Not immediately, of course, but is he a cool/good guy?

[olivetree]

I'd be disgusted by his behaviour and move on.

There would be no coming back from this if he decided to get in touch again.

[nychic009]

Ohhhh I wouldn't do that. You see, when he wants to talk to you, is when you would TELL him your hesitation, i.e. that blocking you was immature and reactive. If you want to tell him off and reach out to him to do so, that's essentially you being immature and selfish and accomplishes nothing.....

 

THANK YOU! Needed to hear that! ❤️

Edited August 6, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[nychic009]

...... Would you ever like the friend? Not immediately, of course, but is he a cool/good guy?

 

Haha, I actually did like his friend. But I’d never be sketch and go for my guys best friend if I were still dating him.

Edited August 6, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[PRW]

Well, I'm coming late to the party here...but I figure I'll chime in some thoughts.

 

I think it is:

4) He is emotionally unstable and has a mental illness.

 

Now I don't think "mental illness", but I go with "mentally unstable" or would say "emotionally unstable". Reminds me of the spoiled little brat that always wanted everything he saw, and always got what he wanted, and threw a tantrum if he didn't.

 

Here's why:

 

1. We went on maybe 5 dates in two weeks. (That is too much at the beginning)
   
2. Really intense emotional connection. (More of an out-of-control emotional connection)
   
3. During my trip he msged me throughout the day, every day. (Needy "Remember me! Remember me!" kind of behavor)
   
4. Remembered my birthday, interview, all these important dates and asked about them and checked in etc. (More needy "Remember me! Remember me!" kind of behavor)
   
5. Next morning Sat, I check our convo and see that he was kinda salty about me choosing to stay at my friends houseparty (Butthurt, details don't really matter, you already had plans for Sunday, Sunday was good enough. There was nothing wrong with each doing their own thing on Saturday)
   
6. Then [sunday] BAM! 2 hours later I go to respond to a msg he had sent earlier and find out I am blocked on every social media platform. I text him why he blocked me and as I was doing so he blocked me number as well. (Irrational childish response, tantrum for not getting what he wanted in the way that he wanted it.)
   

He could have also picked up another woman on Saturday wherever he was at while you were at the house party, and he dropped you for her, but that still doesn't change anything I said above. If this one is true, he will behave the same way and do the same thing to her as he did with you.

[Versacehottie]

Haha, I actually did like his friend. But I’d never be sketch and go for my guys best friend if I were still dating him.

 

Gonna guess this is a part of what played into Mr Beta's shenanigans He was worried about it, felt it and probably has lost other girls or other battles to Mr Alpha.

 

Leave it all alone for a few weeks and see which guy steps up. I don't think you should date mr beta but if his friend has done a fair waiting period where it isn't sketch and is a good guy, I think you'd be in your rights to go for it. Fair to me would be in the weeks range. You didn't go out with Beta for long/handful of dates and he blocked you. He lost many rights there. Make sure you don't jump to the other guy but if he does the work to create a friendship, flirty friendship and tries to date you after having put in some work, I don't see why not

[PRW]

It's someone else. When somebody comes on so strong so quickly like that, it's usually a sign of an emotional person who can attach and detach their feelings with ease. Yeah, he liked you, but someone else captured his attention just as quickly, or the one that got away came back, etc.

Yea, that is exactly what I think of him. Either narcissistic or just a general "spoiled brat" type that wants everything he sees, attention span an inch long, and throws a tantrum when he doesn't get what he wants.

[Calmandfocused]

Reading between the lines he was annoyed that you prioritised time with your friends over him. And you should! You barely know the man.

 

In his mind you should have prioritised him and he couldn’t shake it.

 

Everything you’ve written suggests that he had the mentality of some sort of a “ownership” over you. Highly inappropriate, especially due to the little amount of time you’ve been dating.

 

His ego couldn’t take it so he withdrew.

 

Too full on very quickly is a bad sign.

[nychic009]

Yea, that is exactly what I think of him. Either narcissistic or just a general "spoiled brat" type that wants everything he sees, attention span an inch long, and throws a tantrum when he doesn't get what he wants.

 

 

LOL, he would constantly make fun of himself for his short attention span. He's def. a spoiled brat and he would post stories just for me to watch and as soon as I watched it he'd delete them and msg me. I think he just really wanted to know my availability/wanted my attention all the time.

[d0nnivain]

When he told you where he'd be he expected you to show up there. When you went to a house party he got his nose out of joint.

 

He needs a LOT of attention. You need to date an adult.