basil67 Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 Woggle, if I got offended and dumped every guy who did an oops, I'd be single forever. I'd rather be happy and in a relationship where we forgive each other's little oopses. And Twitter isn't real life - it's nothing more than a meaningless echo chamber. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 Maybe but many people aren't like you and twitter is made up of real people. If a woman went on there making the same thread the OP made they would damn near be ready to castrate the guy. Link to post Share on other sites
Mrin Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 Woggle - you had a good point and then you lost it with the agenda comment. Link to post Share on other sites
JuneL Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 Woggle: You call that self respect, but others may call it high maintenance. My SO is objectively very good looking. But he’d still be the sexiest man alive to me even if he had one eye or one leg. Your haircut is something you can change tomorrow (by styling it differently), just like the shirt you’re wearing; it’s not like she said his nose looks weird for god’s sake! Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 Yep, not like me and frequently single. Ability to not take ones self to seriously is an asset. Yes, Twitter is made of real people, but there are many Tweets which are just shouty and stupid and are ignored by most. You do yourself no favours by taking notice of them. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
JuneL Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 Maybe but many people aren't like you and twitter is made up of real people. If a woman went on there making the same thread the OP made they would damn near be ready to castrate the guy. And you agree with these woman in your imaginary Twitter thread? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 It's better to be single than be with somebody who mocks you. Being single is not the worst thing in the world. If you are dating somebody for a long time and they make fun of you and you know there is no malice behind it then fine but in the early days when they are putting their best foot forward who knows how it will turn out when she gets real. Link to post Share on other sites
5x5 Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 (edited) In all of my sexual relationships I have never had a problem or hesitation in telling my partners, that I don't like something they have done to their appearance. Likewise I have never had any problem with any of my sexual partners, telling me they don't like something that I have done to my appearance. For example my wife has had haircuts that were just yuck, so I have told her that her haircut sux. Likewise when we started dating she had this skirt that she wore, which I never liked and I wasn't shy about telling her how horrid it was. Of which she had no problem continuing to wear it, despite my dislike of it because she liked it. I imagine it must be terribly hard being in a sexual relationship, with someone who has such a fragile ego. That they need someone to blow smoke up their behind, lest they get upset because they are incredibly insecure. Fortunately for me, my wife isn't a safe space junkie. So she is fine with me talking to her honestly without having to tip toe around a fragile ego. Of which my wife likes that I tell her like it is. Since she knows that when I tell her she looks awesome, i'm not blowing smoke up her rectum for fear of upsetting her. Edited May 25, 2019 by 5x5 2 Link to post Share on other sites
5x5 Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 If you are dating somebody for a long time and they make fun of you and you know there is no malice behind it then fine but in the early days when they are putting their best foot forward who knows how it will turn out when she gets real. This best foot forward at the beginning of a relationship approach is alien to me. I've found that the women I have been with as have I, are ourselves from the get go. No pretending to be something they are not, no tiptoeing around the other, no worrying about hurt feelings. Perhaps I have got lucky, yet I have found it is a lot easier to just be oneself and accept people as they are. Of which having now being married for 20 years to my second wife. We still do the things that we did when we started dating 23 years ago, and still treat each other the same as well. I imagine that people who are more fragile and sensitive about their egos, tend to have a lot more trouble finding great ongoing sexual relationships. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 (edited) Same here 5x5. I am WYSIWYG and would have issues with a partner who faked best behaviour at the start. I probably wouldn't trust someone who seemed too perfect from the start. Edited May 25, 2019 by basil67 2 Link to post Share on other sites
guest569 Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 Yep, not like me and frequently single. Ability to not take ones self to seriously is an asset. Definitely. I'm a pretty sensitive person too and can cut people off too easily (friends and fam). There are examples throughout the thread where women have received criticism about their perms etc. And did not dump the guy. One man made fun of my hair cut and I was laughed it off but was offended but we are still friends. I just tell people if they offend me. His was more an attempt at humour than foot in mouth but obviously he thought my hair cut was ordinary to say the least. Anyway, I can't compete with all the countless "real people in an imaginary Twitter thread" so I'm prob wasting my breath I can understand why someone in HM shoes would be hyper aware of any rude or nasty behaviour though. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 Ha, yes - I was the perm lady. I think if I'd been in the situation of the OP, I would have laughed and said to my date "really?" Would have been amusing to see them trying to backpedal out of the situation. Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 I've been with women in my past that unilaterally approved of everything I said or did...Like I could crush the skull of a puppy dog and shed say "good, he deserved it"... Id never want that....But the way some people are, they almost demand that from a partner......yuck.... TFY 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Springsummer Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 Forget about this folk. This is only an issue because the woman is too replaceable for OP. Imagine if OP is head over heel with this woman, OP probably will just take the so-called insult with gaga.. when you are too replaceable, everything you do and say will be under microscopic and excuse for breakup. You can never be perfect enough. If I were the girl, I will say good riddance. Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 Believe me I dont need a woman to agree with everything I say but mocking a person's appearance that early in dating is a red flag. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 Definitely a red flag. But a red flag is a warning to look out for other issues. One red flag shouldn't be a deal breaker. Thing is, she may not have meant it how it came out. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
JuneL Posted May 25, 2019 Share Posted May 25, 2019 Definitely a red flag. But a red flag is a warning to look out for other issues. One red flag shouldn't be a deal breaker. Thing is, she may not have meant it how it came out. This would be a yellow flag to me. I would have to see if she has the tendency of saying such things. But imagine if I was discussing this thread with a guy I’m dating, and he told me I had such an opinion because I was pushing an agenda, then that would be a glaring red flag. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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