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Relationship with a Scientist or Physicist?


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todreaminblue
Two books I highly recommend on Oppenheimer: American Prometheus, and 109 East Palace. Fantastic books.The first book I mentioned took the authors 25 years to write due to the massive amounts of information to compile. Yes, 25 years!

 

Oppie felt a LOT of guilt about what the bombs did but his initial role was to stop the Nazi’s. It’s a total conundrum and contradiction, as was Oppie himself. Part of it, too, was ego and drive. He pulled off something that had never been done before - and did it in a very short time. And the government he worked so hard for so betrayed him horribly. Oppie’s life was, in some ways, very sad but he was also very fascinating. There was a true innocence about him because of his sheltered life as a youth. The most amazing thing to me is that he and Einstein worked side by side at Princeton for many years. Can you imagine the conversations those two must’ve had? I wrote about this in one of my novels. One of my most lovable characters is - not surprisingly - a physicist turned businessman.

 

What you mention about the quote, it shows you how diverse he was and that diversity is what gave him his edge, I believe. He read poetry, spoke a few languages, hiked, rode horses, etc. Despite all the controversy that surrounded him, to me, he was an amazing person with an astounding mind.

 

 

ill be honest...i didnt know his name.....its why i looked him up on your admiration of him and your reference in your username intrigued me.......its funny because i always wondered the man who created the atomic bomb...how did he feel after it was used and would he take it back.......and i found that out yesterday so thank you for being you......

 

he did look sad and i feel from what you write and what i read finding out about him....misused by a government and discarded...great people often are....seen as a threat...a tall poppy...especially genius....im glad his community stood beside him and recognised the man and his life for what he was and the contribution he had to give.......he is an intriguing man...im glad i know his name now......and ill check out those books you suggested......cheers to you...xo..deb

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Slightly different perspective here, observing scientists who are early in their careers. Permanent positions are very difficult to find, and advancing in your career depends strongly on getting experience working in different locations - this means internationally.

 

So if you want to date a younger (say under 35) scientist, it's unlikely that you'll get to remain in one location to settle down and raise a family until much later than you might expect. Some may find that exciting though.

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Penguin_hugs
Slightly different perspective here, observing scientists who are early in their careers. Permanent positions are very difficult to find, and advancing in your career depends strongly on getting experience working in different locations - this means internationally.

 

So if you want to date a younger (say under 35) scientist, it's unlikely that you'll get to remain in one location to settle down and raise a family until much later than you might expect. Some may find that exciting though.

 

I'd like to add to that- one of the reasons my ex gave for breaking up with me was the lack of stability associated with his job- he would need to reapply for post doctorate positions every 2 years and that could mean a potential move across the country every time. He decided that it would be too hard for me as I like to get settled. I was more annoyed that he made the decision for me without allowing me to decide if that was an issue!

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bathtub-row
I’ll be honest I only knew the name Oppenheimer because my kid goes to Berkeley.

 

I actually met a woman once who had Oppenheimer as her professor in college. It was s total random meeting and conversation while I was having a pedicure done and visiting someone in Arizona. I just about fell over when she told me that.

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I'd like to add to that- one of the reasons my ex gave for breaking up with me was the lack of stability associated with his job- he would need to reapply for post doctorate positions every 2 years and that could mean a potential move across the country every time. He decided that it would be too hard for me as I like to get settled. I was more annoyed that he made the decision for me without allowing me to decide if that was an issue!

 

Very good point, my first two relationships ended this way. (My first gf now teaches at a college in Oregon.) Things became much easier once I dated women with more established careers.

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I actually met a woman once who had Oppenheimer as her professor in college. It was s total random meeting and conversation while I was having a pedicure done and visiting someone in Arizona. I just about fell over when she told me that.

 

Everything happens for a reason!

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Springsummer
I know nothing about physics but my university has a very famous Professor in the Department of Physics (particle science) whose mere presence has boosted the profile of the department by quite a margin.

 

He's quite young, good looking and very unassuming. He also got a number 1 hit in the charts back in the day as part of a very famous pop band.

 

Based on that (and on that thread, on Galileo and on Einstein), physicists certainly seem like cool cucumbers.

 

google is almighty...just search number 1 hit and particle science...and then you can actually see that person's face:cool:

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I know nothing about physics but my university has a very famous Professor in the Department of Physics (particle science) whose mere presence has boosted the profile of the department by quite a margin.

 

He's quite young, good looking and very unassuming. He also got a number 1 hit in the charts back in the day as part of a very famous pop band.

 

Based on that (and on that thread, on Galileo and on Einstein), physicists certainly seem like cool cucumbers.

 

Sounds like Brian Cox, though he’s more “media tart” than “very famous professor”, and D-Ream is more “mediocre one-hit-wonder” than “very famous pop band”.[]

 

Good looking science communicators these days are nothing on Carl Sagan.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Personalized question redacted
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CrazyKatLady

It's pretty bad. I'd rather die than not do science everyday for a job. That being said--I love my family and always want them with me--its just a bit boring and trying at times to understand the drive to continue to test ideas, theories, and do research. I love being in a lab with a microscope as much as I love being with my family. I am blessed to have found the 2 pieces of the pie that make my world go round. Except for my faith, I need very little else in life to make me happy.

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bathtub-row
It's pretty bad. I'd rather die than not do science everyday for a job. That being said--I love my family and always want them with me--its just a bit boring and trying at times to understand the drive to continue to test ideas, theories, and do research. I love being in a lab with a microscope as much as I love being with my family. I am blessed to have found the 2 pieces of the pie that make my world go round. Except for my faith, I need very little else in life to make me happy.

 

See, I'm starting to think that a man like this would be good for me. I tend to be in my head a lot, get very fixated on writing for hours and hours on end, and need alone time. Every guy I've been with in the past has been so incredibly needy that writing wasn't even a possibility. I could barely read a book without some form of whining or attention-getting method being directed at me.

 

I think what I've been missing all along is an intelligent guy who isn't needy. Physicists or scientists seem to fit the bill and I really admire them. If he spent hours in the lab, I really wouldn't mind that. It seems like a good fit.

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I know that this will be taken as bragging but to me it is no different than saying how tall I am since I was born with my IQ and did nothing to get it. I have an IQ in the genius range. Although not a scientist or physicist, I am in computer science.

 

My wife took a trade course in high school to learn how to be a secretary. Our IQs are miles apart and she seldom understands what I am doing for a living since I have had 5 different careers, quitting after I reached the top to take on a new challenge. We are now married 45 years but our intelligence differences were a problem for awhile until my wife stopped trying to compare herself to me and she recognized that she had many skills that I did not have.

 

Best way to describe your life would be to look at the characters of Leonard and Penny on the TV show The Big Bang. That is us. At first Penny was always accusing Leonard of thinking she is stupid or making her feel that way, but over the years she just accepted him and realized that she had skills that he does not have and having a higher IQ does not make you better than anyone or a know it all. We had it easier because despite being in classes for gifted students I was a jock and a decorated combat vet instead of a geek like most of the kids in the gifted student program in school.

 

If you have a high IQ and a very Logical brain you should be fine otherwise you will need to adjust to each other as we did. You sound like you are Sapiosexual. I have run into girls like that who had sex with me due to my intelligence. Some girls find intelligence sexy. I know this from experience. :)

 

Never ran into a girl who was specific about the Science of the guy since that really does not mean much unless you are in the same field. I cannot understand much of Quantum Physics and despite being on an equal footing as far as intelligence, I would not hang out with him since we do not share the same knowledge and interests. You may have the same problem.

Edited by Steve51
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Was married a Ph'd Chemist -she looked down on me and was cold and calculating.

 

But in fairness - I had met a few of her female PH'd friends (other wives) and they seemed nice.

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littleblackheart
Good looking science communicators these days are nothing on Carl Sagan.

 

I've just googled him - I guess it really is a matter of personal opinion.

 

Like I said, I know nothing about physics nor, in truth, do I have any specific interest in it, other than an intellectual curiosity for anyone who challenges the status quo (in every field, not just physics).

 

Famous doesn't mean quality but I was just pointing out that his mere presence has boosted the Department no end, and that he is ecclectic (that's what was discussed back when in the thread) - I didn't say I was a fan.

 

My only other physics reference is Phoebe's mad on off boyfriend from Gdansk in Friends (I'm old) - not very highbrow, as you can see!

Edited by littleblackheart
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I've just googled him - I guess it really is a matter of personal opinion.

 

Carl Sagan was a good communicator and had something paternal about him, maybe that's why I liked to watch him as a kid. What I give him credit for is that he kept to the basics, he knew what words were able to convey and what not. He realized the limitations of what he could communicate this way. (A limitation that Stephen Hawking didn't realize quite as well and overstepped in the second half of "A Brief History of Time".)

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bathtub-row
I know that this will be taken as bragging but to me it is no different than saying how tall I am since I was born with my IQ and did nothing to get it. I have an IQ in the genius range. Although not a scientist or physicist, I am in computer science.

 

My wife took a trade course in high school to learn how to be a secretary. Our IQs are miles apart and she seldom understands what I am doing for a living since I have had 5 different careers, quitting after I reached the top to take on a new challenge. We are now married 45 years but our intelligence differences were a problem for awhile until my wife stopped trying to compare herself to me and she recognized that she had many skills that I did not have.

 

Best way to describe your life would be to look at the characters of Leonard and Penny on the TV show The Big Bang. That is us. At first Penny was always accusing Leonard of thinking she is stupid or making her feel that way, but over the years she just accepted him and realized that she had skills that he does not have and having a higher IQ does not make you better than anyone or a know it all. We had it easier because despite being in classes for gifted students I was a jock and a decorated combat vet instead of a geek like most of the kids in the gifted student program in school.

 

If you have a high IQ and a very Logical brain you should be fine otherwise you will need to adjust to each other as we did. You sound like you are Sapiosexual. I have run into girls like that who had sex with me due to my intelligence. Some girls find intelligence sexy. I know this from experience. :)

 

Never ran into a girl who was specific about the Science of the guy since that really does not mean much unless you are in the same field. I cannot understand much of Quantum Physics and despite being on an equal footing as far as intelligence, I would not hang out with him since we do not share the same knowledge and interests. You may have the same problem.

 

Sapiosexual. Wow, I’ve never heard that word before but, yes, it describes me perfectly. My IQ was tested when I was in my mid-30’s at around 126. So, I’m no genius but not a dummy, either (although some might debate that - lol). I know that even when I was young, I did not get it when girls went wild over the dumb jocks. Such a turn-off for me. Like the “Joey” types on Friends. There was nothing at all attractive about him as far as I was concerned.

 

I can see where the relationship with your wife would’ve been challenging. I’m kind of surprised it lasted but it encourages me that I don’t have to be a genius to have a smart guy. I guess I focus on Physicists because I just don’t think a person can be any kind of dumb to comprehend that topic. But I’m aware that there are all sorts of intelligence out there and I admire all of it. It’s just a matter of where a person chooses to put their focus.

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littleblackheart
Carl Sagan was a good communicator and had something paternal about him, maybe that's why I liked to watch him as a kid. What I give him credit for is that he kept to the basics, he knew what words were able to convey and what not. He realized the limitations of what he could communicate this way. (A limitation that Stephen Hawking didn't realize quite as well and overstepped in the second half of "A Brief History of Time".)

 

I can only take your word for it. To me, Physics = Archimede, Galileo, Newton and Einstein and even then, only the headlines so you see, I have much to learn. I don't feel competent enough to read Hawking (or anyone else) and I don't think my brain / personal interest are geared towards that sort of thing but it's always a pleasure to listen to people talk about what makes them tick.

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I can see where the relationship with your wife would’ve been challenging. I’m kind of surprised it lasted but it encourages me that I don’t have to be a genius to have a smart guy. I guess I focus on Physicists because I just don’t think a person can be any kind of dumb to comprehend that topic. But I’m aware that there are all sorts of intelligence out there and I admire all of it. It’s just a matter of where a person chooses to put their focus.

 

Actually, I can see how it might work for Steve. Two smart people tend to compete, especially if their interests overlap. I have a friend who is a psychologist and she cannot stop analyzing her own partners. (She tries to analyze me too, but I simply tell her not to.) This eventually leads to some form of conflict because her men feel belittled, especially if they are not dumb themselves.

 

Personally, I've largely been with smart women, but generally the artistic, creative type. We didn't get in each other's way.

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