Girlfriend has only dated black men

[westernxer]

I'm also of mixed heritage... Samoan mother, white father.

 

[JPMorgan]

Hi eclipse,

The only way you are going to have your answer is to ask her. Obviously this is something that is or could be a concern for you and you should find out what her reasons are, and why she would make a statement about her family really likeing you because you are white.

 

Maybe she dated black guys only to irritate her family - in that case she used them and that's not a quality you probably want in a companion.

 

I don't think there is anything wrong with feeling that races shouldn't mix either. I get pretty sick and tired of others telling me that there is something wrong with me for not believing like they do. Its not racist to feel that races shouldn't mix -- the racism comes in when someone decides that to take offense and starts calling names. I know some people of another race than mine who firmly believe that races should stick together -- not marry and produce children outside their race. Bully for them-- its their belief and it doesn't make them racist. They never said a person of another race was in any way inferior and they don't believe that, but there are some people who will hear that. Makes me wonder if those who shout the loudest about racism aren't the most racist of all!

 

It also seems that only white people can be racist. It's OK for a black person, hispanic person, italian person, indian person, etc. to want to keep to their own race and not want to date outside their race. That's just fine. But, let a white person say that and here comes the loud cry of 'Racist'.

 

Anyway, ask her why she dated exclusively black before and ask her why she went out with you when you first asked her. If you can't talk about this comfortably with here, then you will have problems in the future.

[SUNSHINE143]

Hell Yeah JP MORGAN! I agree whole-heartedly. I am a strong, proud WHITE women and that's okay for me to say. These days people will jump you for making a comment like that, weather anyone admits it or not.

 

I will not date outside of my race for a lot of reason, as for men with accents I feel like I must talk slower, for black men, my back ground is so different than ANY of my black friends that we couldn't blend. Also I'm not attracted to black me as far as physical features either.

 

Plus, my niece is mixed and I see the way both blacks, and whites look at me when I'm carrying her around a store. Every posted reply I have read makes it seem like whites are the only people who can be racist, that's Bulls***. My sister boyfriend, the father of her daughter, don't care for the fact that my sister is white.

 

It is how you were raised and how big of a deal someone is going to make of an innocent question. I'll be the first to say that color doesn't make you less equal, but wanting something for nothing, or starting drama just to have it makes you trash!!!!!!!

 

Ask you girlfriend, ever I would wonder why now she wants to date you. Did she have something against white men before or what?

[SUNSHINE143]

Hell Yeah JP MORGAN! I agree whole-heartedly. I am a strong, proud WHITE women and that's okay for me to say. These days people will jump you for making a comment like that, weather anyone admits it or not.

 

I will not date outside of my race for a lot of reason, as for men with accents I feel like I must talk slower, for black men, my back ground is so different than ANY of my black friends that we couldn't blend. Also I'm not attracted to black me as far as physical features either.

 

Plus, my niece is mixed and I see the way both blacks, and whites look at me when I'm carrying her around a store. Every posted reply I have read makes it seem like whites are the only people who can be racist, that's Bulls***. My sister boyfriend, the father of her daughter, don't care for the fact that my sister is white.

 

It is how you were raised and how big of a deal someone is going to make of an innocent question. I'll be the first to say that color doesn't make you less equal, but wanting something for nothing, or starting drama just to have it makes you trash!!!!!!!

 

Ask you girlfriend, ever I would wonder why now she wants to date you. Did she have something against white men before or what?

[alphamale]

Originally posted by westernxer

I'm also of mixed heritage... Samoan mother, white father.

is that the mom that used to hit you on the head with coconuts?

[westernxer]

Originally posted by alphamale

 

is that the mom that used to hit you on the head with coconuts?

 

Shoes, slippers, sticks, rolled-up newspapers, whatever she could get her hands on. Psychology came with a handprint back in those days...

 

[alphamale]

Originally posted by westernxer

Shoes, slippers, sticks, rolled-up newspapers, whatever she could get her hands on. Psychology came with a handprint back in those days...

...now I know why you always wear a skull cap

[westernxer]

Originally posted by alphamale

 

...now I know why you always wear a skull cap

 

My horns may scare the children away... *evil grin*

 

[AlmostMarried77]

Originally posted by westernxer

I'm also of mixed heritage... Samoan mother, white father.

 

Heh, i'm half Irish, half Maltese

 

and my fiance is Indian

 

looking forward to what my grand kids will be

[alphamale]

Originally posted by AlmostMarried77

Heh, i'm half Irish, half Maltese

 

and my fiance is Indian

 

looking forward to what my grand kids will be

they'll be Malt-ish who like to eat curry

[New_Wife]

That's kinda cool. So as an Indian-Scottish mix, am I Indish? or Scottian?

[alphamale]

Originally posted by Star Gazer

That doesn't make a Catholic an anti-semite, or a Jew a Jesus hater. Puleeze.

sure it does STARGAZER....the whole Nazi regime was based upon the idea that certain peoples were not good enuf to marry Germans or even live in Germany....

 

racism has to start somewhere and if you think that a certain class of folks are not "marryable" then that is the start of hatred and intolerance.

good day

alpha

[blackchild]

speaking as a black woman, i would have to say that white guys can hang too! I had a dated a guy that is filipino and white and trust me he had a little one! but it didn't bother me because he was cute, he had a nice personality, and he can eat a mean puss! anyways, some girls just have a prefernece, you know when girls were younger they wanted that tough "thug-life" boyfriend and since that's a common stereotype in black men she may have been attracted to that. There is nothing wrong with interracial dating, some times you have to see beyond color. I'm sure that you have friends that are of some kind of minority. You can see past their color, well it's the same for dating. i guess you're wondering what it would be like to actually be attracted to someone you doesn't neccessarily look like you. I would have to say that some attractions come out of personality. Plus i know that you have seen some black chicks that you wouldn't mine being with, (Tyra banks)LOL! anyways just enjoy you girlfriend, she wants to be with you and i'm sure that she's madly in love with you, and that's all that matters.

Good Luck

[blackchild]

speaking as a black woman, i would have to say that white guys can hang too! I once dated a guy that is filipino and white and trust me he had a little one! but it didn't bother me because he was cute, he had a nice personality, and he can eat a mean puss! anyways, some girls just have a prefernece, you know when girls were younger they wanted that tough "thug-life" boyfriend and since that's a common stereotype in black men she may have been attracted to that. There is nothing wrong with interracial dating, some times you have to see beyond color. I'm sure that you have friends that are of some kind of minority. You can see past their color, well it's the same for dating. i guess you're wondering what it would be like to actually be attracted to someone you doesn't neccessarily look like you. I would have to say that some attractions come out of personality. Plus i know that you have seen some black chicks that you wouldn't mine being with, (Tyra banks)LOL! anyways just enjoy you girlfriend, she wants to be with you and i'm sure that she's madly in love with you, and that's all that matters.

Good Luck

[alphamale]

Originally posted by Star Gazer

There's nothing wrong with that, IMO.

What is wrong with it, STARGAZER, it that mentality breeds hatred, racism and intolerance. If i have a son and I keep telling him that people with green eyes are different and we don't like them and to never hang out with them and they are evil and bad then he will grow up to not like people with green eyes.

 

Its that simple. Most of peoples likes and dislikes are formed before they turn 15 yrs old.

[SoftDrink]

Originally posted by Star Gazer

We'll just have to agree to disagree, Alpha. Mwah!

 

 

i have to agree with you here.

 

i haven't dated anyone outside my race, and i probably won't. i'm not attracted to many characteristics that blacks, asians, peurto ricans, etc, have.

 

i am also not going to pretend i like something i don't for the sake of not being called a racist. if that's as racist as i get, then i'm okay with myself. i don't hurt anyone, i don't burn crosses or anything ridiculous. i have friends of all different kinds, and i've not had a spark with anyone who's not white.

 

oh well.

[animo]

Originally posted by eclipse123

This is a wierd awkward issue here. My girlfriend and I are both white. I'm not racist let me get that out of the way. Anways I've been going out with her for 3 months. I love her everything is great. I knew her ex was black and that didn't bother me, however today I found out that she's pretty much exclusively dated black guys. She was talking to me and she said all the guys she's dated have been black and her family will love me cause I'm white. I have to admit I was kinda taken aback by this. I am in general against interracial relationships and I feel a little wierd. Everyone knows the stereotype that black men are bigger and better in bed, however she swears I'm the best she's ever had and I"m a 5'8'' white guy. I mean I totally believe her. She wants to marry me. . In the back of my mind I just keep wondering why she only dated black guys. Should I question her about this or just try and let it go. I can't really talk to anyone I know about this cause they would probobly say bad stuff about her.

 

O_o

 

What's the problem with interracial relationships? Being a racist is about discrimination in case you didn't know.... I am personally colour blind when it comes to relationships. Infact some of the most attracktive girls i have seen were black girls. I couldn not phantom a reason why i wouldn't be in a relationship with them if they turn out to be my type. Really can't, so i have no idea where you are coming from when you say you have a problem with interracial relationship...

 

Secondly: this is just for your information btw. How good you are in the sack has nothing to do with your ethnic group. It has to do with talent and experience. Bigger? Recent statistics show that caucasion males are actually generally larger then black men... hows that for a myth buster?

 

I think you need to take the eye flaps off your head and realize there is no problem and you're making a fuss out of nothing.

[noname]

Originally posted by eclipse123

This is a wierd awkward issue here. My girlfriend and I are both white. I'm not racist let me get that out of the way. Anways I've been going out with her for 3 months. I love her everything is great. I knew her ex was black and that didn't bother me, however today I found out that she's pretty much exclusively dated black guys. She was talking to me and she said all the guys she's dated have been black and her family will love me cause I'm white. I have to admit I was kinda taken aback by this. I am in general against interracial relationships and I feel a little wierd. Everyone knows the stereotype that black men are bigger and better in bed, however she swears I'm the best she's ever had and I"m a 5'8'' white guy. I mean I totally believe her. She wants to marry me. . In the back of my mind I just keep wondering why she only dated black guys. Should I question her about this or just try and let it go. I can't really talk to anyone I know about this cause they would probobly say bad stuff about her.

 

while i understand your concern about your lady friend's behavior because it is a pattern that you find strange, i wouldn't make any assumptions. i would ask her why exactly she chose to do what she did. maybe it wasn't a decision and happened by chance.

 

could just be that she met some nice Black men, she was attracted to them and she dated them. not everyone bases their life decisions on silly stereotypes.

 

and wow, if you can't find anyone to talk to that wouldn't say bad stuff about her, you probably need to start hanging out in different circles...

[noname]

Originally posted by Proto

#2) The fact that she's been with brothas tells me that she's a lot more open-minded and yes...intelligent than you are. It's quite frankly, a shame that she's settling for you and not waiting to be with a man who is much more on her intellectual level.

 

 

 

This girl is a sweet, open-minded and non-bigoted girl. Don't corrupt her with your prejudice views and find someone else who has similar views to your own.

 

i wouldn't make any assumptions about this either, come to think of it. just because someone dates outside of their race, does not mean that they are not prejudiced and a non-bigot. while i don't agree with his assumptions, i think he has the right to ask her since she brought it up. in fact, it may do some good because depending on how and why he does ask, it'll be good that he gets his views (even if they are prejudiced out in the open for discussion. if your woman had some kind of views that you didn't agree with, wouldn't you want them to come out in early in the relationship?

[noname]

Originally posted by Woggle

White women who date black men only are in love with the sterotype not the man. They are the first to cry rape when things don't go their way. Look at what happened to Koby Bryant.

 

i hope you are joking...

[noname]

Originally posted by 933KJL

Most black americans are descended from the Caribbean nations and there is someting in the religion that is tied in with menstruation and the blood and the evil spirits (old time teachings) so naturally no one wants to drink from that fountain!

 

hugh? whatever the person that told you that is smoking... i want some...

[Woggle]

Originally posted by noname

i hope you are joking...

 

It's true. Back in the days when white women were discoveed to be having affairs with black men they accused the men of rape and then the men were hung. Most of the lynchings that happened in the old days were about a black man being with a white woman. Nowadays white women are the same but now at least they give the guy a trial. Not all white women are like this are even all white women who are with a black man but many are. They want to rebell against daddy and they get the most stereotypical blackman they could find who looks like 50 cent and they use him to get at daddy. They are spoiled suburban princesses. Now some people of different races genuinly fall in love and I am all for that. My ex wife is half italian and half japanese. She betrayed me but it has nothing to do with her race.

[Tony T]

In many cases of women dating Black men, I have sensed that the woman...either consciously or subconsciously...was trying to get back at her father....who happened to be racist. In other words, many women who dislike their abusive or otherwise neglectful male, or even female, parent will date a Black person or person of another race just to spite them...to get back at them...to piss them off. The joy they get from doing that outweighs all other factors. As irrational as it may sound, there are people who will do that. Almost everybody knows somebody in their life who dated somebody their parents didn't like just to tick them off.

 

Of course, this is not always the case.

 

I won't way anymore, except that in my experience as a landlord I was eyewitness to the break up of at least four interracial partnerships and in every case the female regreted ever having done it....mostly because of the ensuing problems following the break up....and that's where I'll stop.

[noname]

Originally posted by Woggle

It's true. Back in the days when white women were discoveed to be having affairs with black men they accused the men of rape and then the men were hung. Most of the lynchings that happened in the old days were about a black man being with a white woman. Nowadays white women are the same but now at least they give the guy a trial. Not all white women are like this are even all white women who are with a black man but many are. They want to rebell against daddy and they get the most stereotypical blackman they could find who looks like 50 cent and they use him to get at daddy. They are spoiled suburban princesses. Now some people of different races genuinly fall in love and I am all for that. My ex wife is half italian and half japanese. She betrayed me but it has nothing to do with her race.

 

i hear you about history. and a lot of lynchings were for that reason (although i wouldn't say most). and i even understand the basis for your argument. it is true for many women.

 

however, your first statement seemed like you were so sure that all White women were like this. both things you are talking about (rebellion and scapegoating) do in fact happen. what you are talking about is unfortunate, but i think it is also a small minority of women who feel they have to do so.

 

and in my opinion the Kobe case was based on greed. she wanted loot, and she cried rape to get some, not because she got caught with a Black man...

[Woggle]

Originally posted by noname

i hear you about history. and a lot of lynchings were for that reason (although i wouldn't say most). and i even understand the basis for your argument. it is true for many women.

 

however, your first statement seemed like you were so sure that all White women were like this. both things you are talking about (rebellion and scapegoating) do in fact happen. what you are talking about is unfortunate, but i think it is also a small minority of women who feel they have to do so.

 

and in my opinion the Kobe case was based on greed. she wanted loot, and she cried rape to get some, not because she got caught with a Black man...

 

I am never one to sterotype an entire group of people but you can't deny that many white women ahve this mentality. Black men who are with a white woman should take a look at her parents to see whether she is rebelling or she really loves him.

 

Also Kobe was about money but she picked a black man for a reason.