I need hope

[Anna2000]

When he detected that she was catching feelings, he could easily have strung her along to keep getting the sex, but no, he broke it off to save her feelings. To me, the guy has been nothing but up-front, honest and decent all along.

 

That's true.

 

He's MARRIED & is going back to his wife. He told you he didn't want anything serious even when he slept with you & took you on vacation. You know he's trying to date his wife & reconcile with her.

 

Where in there do you think there's a chance for you?

 

This is not certain. From what he told me I think he's not sure if he wants to go back to her.

 

 

Can you clarify why you think you have a chance? Maybe if people here understood your mentality, we might be able to better figure out how to help you.

 

I am so sorry for your pain..I've definitely been there..but I agree with everyone else. I don't believe you have a chance..I don't think he's coming back. Not in the way you want him to.

 

Maybe it's the way he treated me. I felt good with him and when he showed he cared about me, I also felt he was having a good time with me and he said it many times. And I can't believe that you can spend time with someone and not to feel just a little bit attached to that person or not to feel anything. Of course, it's not love in this case, I know. And as I said, there probably is something in me, something that attracted him to me to make him want to spend time with me. And I probably still have it.

 

 

Also, I doubt very seriously if NC is going to work for you. You'll never stick to it.

 

If you feel compelled to continue to contact him, do it. Just try not to be a pest. If sending emails, and leaving him messages is what you need to do to help you cope, do it. I know this is a complete 360 from what most people will advise, but my reason is this. Your ex is moving on. He said that he didn't want the relationship anymore. Problem is, he seems to be leaving the door open a crack, telling you he'll call, etc. In your particular case, only time, reality, and a slow erosion of your heart is going to force you to move on, because as of now, you harbor too much hope for it to be any other way. Now i'm not saying all hope is lost, because people do change their minds. But for now, at least try to limit the contact as much as you can, give him as much space as you can. Remember, absence makes the heart grow fonder. Not saying this will work, and he may never come back, but you have a much better chance than if you hound him constantly.

 

I wish the best for you, and I hope you get over this pain sooner than later.

 

I really will try do to No Contact. For at least a month. Maybe more. I already deactivated my facebook account. I want to give him space. I don't want to be clingy. I know how I acted, I am ashamed of my behaviour, I can't even explain why I did this and what is my problem. Maybe I am girl who is insecure and doesn't believe in herself. Whatever the reason is, I'm not happy with the way I acted.

 

Actually, here's what my clingy behaviour was - after the meeting where he first told me he doesn't want us to see each other anymore and I said I was ok with our relationship, he said he doesn't believe me, but I said it's ok and we can meet every two-three weeks if he doesn't want it to be more often, but asked him if that is our last meeting and he said no, so i said "see you in a few weeks".

Two weeks later I called, he was busy then and said he'll call when he gets home. But he never did. I waited for more than a week and tried calling him again. This time the line was busy so I guessed he'll call me later. He didn't. I called again few hours later, again there was no answer. So i texted him asking is everything ok, because I thought something bad happened to him. He didn't answer.

I waited for three days and sent him a text asking him if he wants to call. And I called once that day. He called me in the evening, we spoke, he said his father is in a hospital, he said we could meet after New Year.

So that's when I stopped calling him for a while. I knew he had problems.

He called me on Christmas day.

Three days after New Year, I sent him a text wishing him a happy new year. He called five days later and that's when I decided not to pick up... And didn't call him back. I wanted to wait a few days to see if he'll call again. But i just coulnd't.

I called him the next day, no answer.

The next day I called again twice, no answer.

The third day I sent a text asking if he'll call. He didn't answer again. In the evening I sent another text asking him why he's doing this.

The next day I didn't call.

But on the next day I sent another text saying I'll be glad if he calls just one time and I think I called again. This time he called, we spoke for a while and he said he'll call me the next day and even asked when I finish work so he could call.

He didn't call. I saw him online and wrote to him that if he doesn' plan to call, he shouldn't say he'll do it. He just read it and didn't answer.

Then, at the end of the week this happened

 

Finally, I wrote him another message saying that probably the time we spent together doesn’t mean anything to him and that he doesn’t even have a little respect for me just to answer my phone calls and that it really hurts. He didn’t even read it. Again, five days later I sent him a text asking him if he wants to meet. He called and said he doesn’t want us to see each other anymore because our relationship is pointless and a torture for me and for him because we were going nowhere. I asked him if he could invite me over so we could just have sex, and I asked him this a few times and everytime he said no. I know I really sounded desperate. Then he said we could meet to talk if a phone conversation wasn’t enough for me.

 

I remember, that this time we talked about half an hour on the phone and he said "Good night" and hung up, just while I was asking him when we could meet. (Yes, I understand why he hung up - I kept asking him why he doesn't want me to come over). I called him a few times after this, but he didn't pick up. I wrote him on Facebook, he was online but he wasn't reading my messages. He anwswered the next day saying we'll meet on Friday.

 

I know it's awful. And I don't want to justify the way I acted. But when someone says to me that he'll call I expect him to do it.

Edited February 3, 2016 by Anna2000

[PegNosePete]

when someone says to me that he'll call I expect him to do it.

He only said that to get rid of you.

 

You need to listen to what he's saying. His silence speaks volumes. He is not interested in a relationship.

[blackbird_brokenwing]

Let me ask you this...

 

Do you like how you feel right now? Do you want to feel this way, or have the risk of feeling this way, for the next six months? Year? Many years?

 

I ask because that's how it will be with this guy if he were to give you a chance. Let's pretend even for a moment that he would, it would be this same game over and over. He isn't going to be emotionally ready to seriously commit to ANYONE for years. Are you willing to wait? Are you willing to feel like this indefinitely just for the CHANCE that he could come around?

 

If he gives you a chance, his wife will always be there. In the back of his mind. The bar, other girls, the single life... it's all right in front of him and he wants, and maybe even NEEDS that right now. Even if you got the chance you are looking for, it would NEVER be roses and happiness, at least not for a LONG time.

 

There is someone out there who *WANTS* you. Remember that. Someone you won't have to bend over backwards to get, or be on your hands and knees begging them to call you. They will because they will want to. You'll feel that and you'll kick yourself for giving two ****s about this current guy. I PROMISE you will.

 

Take it one day at a time. Please. I think deactivating your Facebook indefinitely is going to make you feel more isolated and lonely. Maybe give it a week or two without it (IF you can also go total NC with him as well), then reactivate and unfriend him. If that's too hard, then just hide him from your feed. Reward yourself with treats for not checking on him for an hour, a day, a week, etc. Go hang out with other people. Distractions are your friend right now. Time is LITERALLY the ONLY thing that will heal this, and distractions are what pass the time.

 

I completely and totally feel for you. I've been right where you are. Currently the love of my life broke up with me and won't speak to me, so I'm really struggling with my own feelings of desperately wanting her back. But what I'm forcing myself to do is total NC. It's hard. It's an addiction. I swear there needs to be a 12 step program for it.

 

Write his number down and give it to a friend. Then delete it from your phone. It will give you comfort knowing you still have it somewhere but it's not easy to get to. Please. I promise you will love yourself in the future for this. Don't let 2016 be the year you wasted by chasing a completely unavailable guy. Life is SO much better than that.

 

<3

[Toodaloo]

I guessed he'll call me later. He didn't.

I called again few hours later, again there was no answer. So i texted him asking is everything ok, because I thought something bad happened to him. He didn't answer.

 

I waited for three days and sent him a text asking him if he wants to call.

 

Three days after New Year, I sent him a text wishing him a happy new year. He called five days later

 

I called him the next day, no answer.

The next day I called again twice, no answer.

The third day I sent a text asking if he'll call. He didn't answer again. In the evening I sent another text asking him why he's doing this.

 

He didn't call. I saw him online and wrote to him that if he doesn' plan to call, he shouldn't say he'll do it. He just read it and didn't answer.

 

I called him a few times after this, but he didn't pick up.

 

I wrote him on Facebook, he was online but he wasn't reading my messages.

 

You still think there is hope?

 

Lady you really have pushed this WAY beyond reasonable.

 

I can tell you right now that every time you call he is thinking "Oh God not her again". He will laugh and tell his friends that you are stalking him and "Oh my God guys this one clings worse than a bad smell". He can't wait to get rid of you. He is probably starting to think about restraining orders. He just wants you to go away.

 

Newsflash. That is not the way someone who wants to be with you or near you acts.

 

Leave him alone! You are obsessed NOT in "love".

 

For goodness sake put him behind you, chalk it up to experience and move on. Give yourself a chance to find someone who will pick up your calls and does want to see you and does want to be with you.

 

I can tell you now it feels a whole heap better than you are feeling right now and you are at the point where you are just being completely over dramatic and silly about it all.

[Anna2000]

IThe bar, other girls, the single life... it's all right in front of him and he wants, and maybe even NEEDS that right now. Even if you got the chance you are looking for, it would NEVER be roses and happiness, at least not for a LONG time.

I guess that maybe bars and having fun is what he needs now... And I know if something happens between us it will take a long time.

 

Take it one day at a time. Please. I think deactivating your Facebook indefinitely is going to make you feel more isolated and lonely. Maybe give it a week or two without it (IF you can also go total NC with him as well), then reactivate and unfriend him. If that's too hard, then just hide him from your feed. Reward yourself with treats for not checking on him for an hour, a day, a week, etc. Go hang out with other people. Distractions are your friend right now. Time is LITERALLY the ONLY thing that will heal this, and distractions are what pass the time.

I deactivated my account knowing that I also cut contact with my friends. I don't really want to hang out with friends, I don't want anyone right now. I'll just stay home for a while.

I don't want to unfriend him. Right now I just don't need to see photos of him having fun with other people.

 

It's been a week since I last saw him and since I started No contact. I miss him and I feel the need to see him, hold him or just to hear his voice. Today I went to a perfume shop just to find and smell his perfume because it reminds me of him and our moments together.

I hope he'll call soon and that I will see him soon.

[DarkHorizon]

I deactivated my account knowing that I also cut contact with my friends. I don't really want to hang out with friends, I don't want anyone right now. I'll just stay home for a while.

I don't want to unfriend him. Right now I just don't need to see photos of him having fun with other people.

 

It's been a week since I last saw him and since I started No contact. I miss him and I feel the need to see him, hold him or just to hear his voice. Today I went to a perfume shop just to find and smell his perfume because it reminds me of him and our moments together.

I hope he'll call soon and that I will see him soon.

 

First mistake - Isolating yourself will just make things worse. Your only conversations will be with yourself, and your ego will justify every single stupid thought you might have, without any sort of consideration or reality check. In other words, you are creating a bubble of delusion to live in.

 

Second mistake - Not unfriending him equals poking a bleeding wound. Can it heal? No, it can get infected. It will just keep hurting, more and more.

 

Third mistake - Doing NC expecting he will call you. No contact isn't for that; you can't use it with a secret agenda.

 

I am sorry, Anna -- just know you are doing EVERYTHING wrong.

The price is high, and know you will be suffering a lot.

We wish you the best of luck, and will be here for you, but don't expect us to tell you only what you want to hear - much less to validate actions that we know are counterproductive to your healing.

[Anna2000]

If I talk with my friends I mostly talk about him. I think they are sick of this and I need to give them a break. It'll be just for a few weeks.

[ExpatInItaly]

If I talk with my friends I mostly talk about him. I think they are sick of this and I need to give them a break. It'll be just for a few weeks.

 

I can promise you they're sick of it.

 

I have a friend who behaved like you in the past. There was a man she refused to let go of, despite his many obvious signs he wasn't interested and did not want to see or talk to her anymore.. All she could talk about was him. It reached obsession level, much like you're currently doing, and it deeply concerned all of us.

 

I will tell you, it didn't end well for my friend. She persisted and persisted and eventually, he phoned the police to get her to stop. She wasn't arrested or anything like that, but she did get a warning that her attention was unwelcome and needed to stop, and could possibly be considered harassment. (This was in the days before smartphones and social media, so blocking her number wasn't possible)

 

Don't do this to yourself. Stop all of this now before you find yourself in hot water.

[BC1980]

If I talk with my friends I mostly talk about him. I think they are sick of this and I need to give them a break. It'll be just for a few weeks.

 

They might be tired of hearing about it because they can see what you can't. It's difficult to see the truth when you are emotional and right in the midst of things. Your case is a classic one, tale as old as time. This guy was newly separated and just wanted some companionship and sex. That's a common thing and a good reason not to get involved with someone who is separated. People who are separated generally tend to be unavailable and are still dealing with emotions from a possible divorce. I remember reading a thread on here about a women dating a separated man. The guy eventually went back to his wife. Go read the OM/OW forum, and you won't see a lot of happy stories. Lesson to be learned: wait until the divorce is final before you date someone.

 

This guy told you what he wanted. He was very clear. It's a lesson to believe what someone says, and don't think you can change him. I think a lot of women fall into the trap of thinking they can make a guy change, settle down, or love them in a different way. It doesn't work like that and often leads to heartache. I think you are treading on dangerous ground by contacting him so much. You might get slapped with a restraining order or a call from his wife.

[ChickiePops]

I guess that maybe bars and having fun is what he needs now... And I know if something happens between us it will take a long time.

 

 

I deactivated my account knowing that I also cut contact with my friends. I don't really want to hang out with friends, I don't want anyone right now. I'll just stay home for a while.

I don't want to unfriend him. Right now I just don't need to see photos of him having fun with other people.

 

It's been a week since I last saw him and since I started No contact. I miss him and I feel the need to see him, hold him or just to hear his voice. Today I went to a perfume shop just to find and smell his perfume because it reminds me of him and our moments together.

I hope he'll call soon and that I will see him soon.

 

Stop worrying about what he needs and worry about what YOU need. Which is to never, ever, ever contact him again unless you want to find yourself on the business end of a restraining order.

 

Your constant messages were not charming or convincing, they were intrusive. You cannot talk someone into caring about you. It sucks but, to be fair, he was honest with you from the get go. You chose not to listen.

 

I'm sorry Anna, I really am, but you are deluding yourself. I've felt the pain of rejection before too. But you really need to stop this. There is no hope. None. Not even a .000000000001% chance. The sooner you admit that to yourself, the quicker you can heal and find someone who DOES want to be with you.

 

If he does ever call you again, it would only be for a quick ego stroke, not for a relationship, and if you pay attention, it'll only hurt more when he goes back to ignoring your afterwards.

 

Please..stop this. Block him.

[Anna2000]

I understand what are you trying to tell me. I shouldn't have called him so many times. I guess I was doing it because I really couldn't undestand why he won't call me even if he said he'll do it.

 

When we met and talked at the end of November I didn't feel like we are breaking up. I remember we met on Friday, he said it's better for us to stop and since I didn't agree with him he said we should meet the next day and talk again.

So the next day he invited me over, we had dinner, watched a movie and had sex. And we didn't talk at all. The next morning I told him I don't mind if we continue our relationship the way it was and keep seeing each other every 2-3 weeks if he doesn't want anything more. He just said it was complicated and it wasn't ok for me, but I said I'm fine. And that was it. I asked him if that is our last meeting and he said "Don't worry". Maybe that's why I kept calling... I really didn't feel like it was a break up.

 

But now I've stopped calling him.

Today I wanted to activate my account for a while but I know I'll check for new photos from the bar or I'll check his profile and it won't make me feel good so I'll wait more before I'm back on Facebook.

And I still wish he would call soon. He said it the last time we saw each other... "I"ll call you"...

Edited February 8, 2016 by Anna2000

[PegNosePete]

He said it the last time we saw each other... "I"ll call you"...

Yes, but he only said that because otherwise, you wouldn't have left him alone.

 

The fact that he never called you, should speak volumes.

 

He simply is not interested.

 

Guys who are interested, don't not call.

[Brando]

"Today I went to a perfume shop just to find and smell his perfume because it reminds me of him and our moments together."

 

Read that back to yourself......then go 100% NC. Maybe see a professional. I always see a therapist, during good times and bad. It helps me keep my focus and a clear mind in relationships, business, health and all around life. Not being harsh. We all do some crazy stuff when we are heartbroken, but I've never gone around and sniffed things...and you shouldn't either.

 

Heal yourself and find someone who reciprocates your feelings.

[Emaize3]

I know how you feel Anna. Everybody tells me the same thing .. Move on. Love yourself, etc. I am also in denial except I'm doing no contact. I don't really have anyone to talk to because they're all sick of me crying over him. I need to follow the same advice you're getting but I wanted you to know that I'm feeling your pain and want my man back too.

[ChickiePops]

I understand what are you trying to tell me. I shouldn't have called him so many times. I guess I was doing it because I really couldn't undestand why he won't call me even if he said he'll do it.

 

When we met and talked at the end of November I didn't feel like we are breaking up. I remember we met on Friday, he said it's better for us to stop and since I didn't agree with him he said we should meet the next day and talk again.

So the next day he invited me over, we had dinner, watched a movie and had sex. And we didn't talk at all. The next morning I told him I don't mind if we continue our relationship the way it was and keep seeing each other every 2-3 weeks if he doesn't want anything more. He just said it was complicated and it wasn't ok for me, but I said I'm fine. And that was it. I asked him if that is our last meeting and he said "Don't worry". Maybe that's why I kept calling... I really didn't feel like it was a break up.

 

But now I've stopped calling him.

Today I wanted to activate my account for a while but I know I'll check for new photos from the bar or I'll check his profile and it won't make me feel good so I'll wait more before I'm back on Facebook.

And I still wish he would call soon. He said it the last time we saw each other... "I"ll call you"...

 

You told him you were willing to accept anything he had to offer you...and he's offered you nothing. Which means he has nothing to offer you.

 

It was definitely a break up. You MUST move on. Block him every which way from Sunday and get on with your life.

[deinonychus]

It made me really sad to read this and it's a bit cringe but we're all human and don't always do what's best for ourselves. As soon as this man said he wasn't ready for a relationship you should have left him to live his life. I'm sure on that first date you felt swept off your feet and imagined the great life you could have with this guy and being rational would have made you feel bad. But how much worse do you feel now? I bet you wished you'd gotten rid of him before you deluded yourself.

 

Learn from this because it sounds like you don't love yourself. You are not defined by another person. You need to do some work on yourself because this story sounds incredibly sad.

[Anna2000]

Yes, but he only said that because otherwise, you wouldn't have left him alone.

 

It would be better if he didn't say things like this. He knows how I feel and he knows that when he says he'll call I take it seriously. I wait for him and I expect he'll do it like he said he would.

 

 

You told him you were willing to accept anything he had to offer you...and he's offered you nothing. Which means he has nothing to offer you.

 

It made me really sad to read this and it's a bit cringe but we're all human and don't always do what's best for ourselves. As soon as this man said he wasn't ready for a relationship you should have left him to live his life. I'm sure on that first date you felt swept off your feet and imagined the great life you could have with this guy and being rational would have made you feel bad. But how much worse do you feel now? I bet you wished you'd gotten rid of him before you deluded yourself.

 

Learn from this because it sounds like you don't love yourself. You are not defined by another person. You need to do some work on yourself because this story sounds incredibly sad.

 

Telling him I'll accept anything just to have the opportunity to be with him was a mistake. I know. And I know I have to work on my self esteem, self respect and dignity. Maybe if it was another woman in my place she would have left him in the beginning. I'm still inexperienced and maybe that's why I made mistakes.

[PegNosePete]

It would be better if he didn't say things like this.

Maybe, but people don't always do what's best. They do what they think is easiest.

 

I wait for him and I expect he'll do it like he said he would.

But now you know that he's never going to, right?

[Anna2000]

But now you know that he's never going to, right?

 

I'm not sure. I really don't know. Maybe he'll surprise me.

[elaine567]

He was always good to me when we were together – we held hands when we were outside, I met his friends, he always held me tight while we sleep, he bought me nice gift for my birthday. He told me few times he really feels good with me. He invited me to a vacation.

He said that it wasn’t just sex for him, but also it wasn’t anything serious.

I guess it wasn’t just sex and that’s what confused me and made me hope for more. I thought that since he wants to go on a vacation with me and to spend more time with me, maybe he would like to try for a more deep releationship. (I think that this kind of behaviour confused me – he said he didn’t want anything serious, but always was so nice and caring, I just thought of that as mixed signals). That’s when I told him I had feelings for him. He once again explained he's not ready for a new realationship right now. And he said he’s afraid that I might fall in love and he doesn’t want to hurt me.

 

This is a man who has been in a relationship for 10 years, during that time he developed ways to show his wife that he loved her, the holding hands, the tight embraces, the spending time with friends, the vacations etc.

Now his relationship is gone, he picked up exactly where he left off with you. By all those loving and caring gestures, he made you feel special, he made you feel he loved you, but that was NOT real, that was just slotting some woman he hardly knew into the vacant spot his wife left.

 

To give him his due, he recognized very early on he was not ready for anything serious and only wanted sex, and kept telling you so, but you choose not to ignore what he was telling you and chose not to believe it.

Time for you to wake up here.

 

When the other side of a relationship is essentially non-responsive to your charms (you did all the chasing here) or only wants a sexual relationship (he kept telling you that), or tells you they don't want anything serious (he kept telling you that too), believe them. DON'T keep pushing for more, it never works out well.

[kxpxsc3]

I'm not sure. I really don't know. Maybe he'll surprise me.

 

 

Sorry girl... but it's doubtful and even if he does, it's not because he loves you and wants to be together but only becuase he wants to feel less guilty for leaving you hanging. Do you really want that? Or do you want the real deal (which this is NOT)??

[Anna2000]

So I was just a substitute for his wife?

 

Wouldn't it be better for him and for people in situations like his to stay alone for a while after the break up? Why do people do this? Of course there is a possibility that they'll end up hurting someone. (It doesn't matter if you say that it won't be anything serious. There is always a possibility that the other person will develop feelings).

I don't want to blame him or anyone. I guess it's not on purpose. It's not like he thought to himself "I'm sad and lonely so I'll go and find someone who I'll use to replace my wife so I'll feel better but I won't invest any emotions in this new relationship".

 

He hasn't even cleared his mind yet, the divorse hasn't been finalized yet and as I understand he hasn't been fully emotionally detached from his relationship. And what he decided to do was to jump into another relationship.

 

I am just trying to fully understand him. What I understand now is that he probably never meant to hurt me. Maybe he feels confused and doesn't know what to do and what he wants right now. He told me that sometimes he feels it's better for him to go to a therapist.

 

As I said, he told me many times it was his fault that I'm hurt, but I don't feel like blaming him. And I'm not sure if he really feels guilty, he's just saying that.

 

Sorry girl... but it's doubtful and even if he does, it's not because he loves you and wants to be together but only becuase he wants to feel less guilty for leaving you hanging. Do you really want that? Or do you want the real deal (which this is NOT)??

 

I would be happy if he called and wouldn't want to think it's a way for him to feel less guilty.

[PegNosePete]

Sorry Anna. You're really just not getting the point here. Have you even read and understood any of the responses you've been given? You seem to be smacking your head against the same brick wall, over and over and over.

 

He did nothing wrong. He told you upfront, right from the beginning, that he was only in it for the sex and the fun. He told you point blank that there was no relationship between you and him. And when you started to get feelings for him, he ended it. Why did he end it? Because he didn't reciprocate those feelings, he didn't want a relationship with you, but he realized you couldn't carry on with the FWB arrangement and didn't want to hurt you. So he ended it.

 

He said it was his fault. He is partially correct. The situation was mutually created by both of you. You didn't understand and could not cope with the FWB situation that you had, and maybe it was his fault for not realizing earlier that you couldn't cope with it. But mostly it is your fault for not listening to the words that he was plainly telling you.

 

Instead, you have, in your mind, constructed a complete fantasy world where you have some kind of committed relationship with him. You have harassed him to the point where he has to lie to get rid of you. You have made him totally wish he never laid eyes on you.

 

And now you're still living in la-la land, hoping he'll "come back" to you. Well, he was never there in the first place! As he said right from the start, it was only a bit of fun for him, but it turned into a complete stalker nightmare. Have you seen Fatal Attraction?

 

As your Frozen namesake says. You need to LET IT GO.

[elaine567]

 

He hasn't even cleared his mind yet, the divorse hasn't been finalized yet and as I understand he hasn't been fully emotionally detached from his relationship. And what he decided to do was to jump into another relationship.

 

NO, he told you he wasn't serious and not ready for a "relationship", you were the one that thought you were in a relationship.

Many separated men do jump headlong into another relationship, and then they wake up to find that the person they have found, is NOT their wife, or a better version of their wife and they then end it, leaving the other person crushed and devastated.

BUT the man you got involved with, told you he wasn't looking for serious from day one, but you weren't listening to him.

[triple-s]

As politely as I can ; I've been that guy before and let me tell you from this point of view . He doesn't love you the way you think he does .

 

He hinted to you he wanted to make it a sexual relationship .

 

But you want something more . He can't give you what you want

 

Only time will tell . Go no contact and stop . If he misses you he will come back ; if he doesn't ... Then you know it's not meant to be ( which is probably what is going to happen )

 

You're going in circles here miss .

 

 

Btw , how old are you ?