Rejected Rosebud Posted January 23, 2016 Share Posted January 23, 2016 There's just a spark and sense of wonderment that the older women do not have. :lmao: YEAH! That's because we are YOUNG PEOPLE! It's not a woman thing. I personally also enjoy the spark and wonderment of my young boyfriend and that's one reason I won't be dating any old men anytime soon ... until we are BOTH mature and match! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
dobielover Posted January 23, 2016 Share Posted January 23, 2016 Ah, I see... if you're famous and rich, age gaps do not matter. If you're a regular joe, they do matter. At 24 years, absolutely. 24 years, they are just not compatible, it's not possible. Clearly, those celebrities are able to score women 24 years their junior for reasons having nothing to do with compatibility. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
123321 Posted January 23, 2016 Share Posted January 23, 2016 "I'm a lot taller when I stand on my wallet" 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SmartDude Posted January 23, 2016 Share Posted January 23, 2016 I can go about 14 years younger I have found. Anything younger than that turns into a confusing mess very quickly. They want to love you, then they hate your guts, then they love you, then your the worst person in the world...etc. see a lost puppy walking down the sidewalk and not stop traffic in both directions to save it? : "******* IM BREAKING UP WITH YOU RIGHT NOW!" Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted January 23, 2016 Share Posted January 23, 2016 At 24 years, absolutely. 24 years, they are just not compatible, it's not possible. Clearly, those celebrities are able to score women 24 years their junior for reasons having nothing to do with compatibility. Not possible? I know celebs have money... but what about Howard Stern? He's at least 30 years his wife's senior and they seem compatible. Sometimes it's about people clicking, no? Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted January 23, 2016 Share Posted January 23, 2016 (edited) I can go about 14 years younger I have found. Anything younger than that turns into a confusing mess very quickly. They want to love you, then they hate your guts, then they love you, then your the worst person in the world...etc. see a lost puppy walking down the sidewalk and not stop traffic in both directions to save it? : "******* IM BREAKING UP WITH YOU RIGHT NOW!" Not sure age is necessarily a factor though.. There are plenty of emotionally unstable women out there of *all* ages. Younger chicks do not have the market cornered on that one.... I think what's happening in this thread is we have a few guys who have had some negative experiences with so-called *older* women. Rigidity, inflexibility, set in her ways, etc. And as such assumes all or most older women are like this, which is absolutely not true. In fact, it's very likely that same woman was just as rigid and inflexible when in her 20's. As that is her nature, her personality. And that free-spirited young woman so full of wunderlust ...will still be that free-spirited woman in her 30's and beyond, as that is *her* nature and personality. I know this as, at 37, I am part of the latter scenario. Still very much a free spirit, extremely open and flexible, adventurous, resilient, love learning ....and living! There are lots of other such *older* women out there too. We're not a dying breed. Edited January 23, 2016 by katiegrl 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 25, 2016 Author Share Posted January 25, 2016 Update time, Sorry, business trip to Sydney, flew back Friday night, and went straight to her place. She leaves for Vietnam Saturday, so I will be spending all this week with her, she's happy about that too, after the usual guilt about cheating on her BF passes. In response to several posts.... Yes, she is a typical young girl, in many ways, but she runs her own business that she set up from scratch, organising the lease, shop refit, advertising etc. She brought herself over from Vietnam, no big money family here, learnt English (which for just two years is pretty good), and is studying business. Bought her own car, etc etc. Know many 24-year-olds like that...? I don't! She absolutely is not after money, insists on paying her share. never asks for a dime for anything. She is insulted at the mere suggestion... About us, clearly she likes me, but doesn't love me, said so in those exact words. I am keeping some perspective about the whole age thing, and of course the moving in with bf later thing...I'm not expecting a life with this girl... Will she fall for me? Maybe, she seems very close, and the time we spend together is effortless, simple, enjoyable, and NO, I'm not just referring to sex, simply eating a basic meal, watching IT Crowd, being close. In bed she caresses my face, looks deeply into my eyes, plays with the hairs on my chest, strokes my legs, her affection is profound. Her nickname for me is "Ugly man" which you may think is horrible, but I love it. Firstly she does finds me attractive, and I'm not so insecure as to let that name worry me. Second, it's MY nickname, not just the usual "honey" or "Sweety" that people tag their "current squeeze" with. It's one she made for me...I don't know if I'm being clear, but it is important to me. We talk, easily, readily, and for a long time. Not the usual bulls-hit talk most young girls babble on about, but good, engaging conversation. I will let her (not that I have a choice, of course) go off and try out a life with this boyfriend. I don't think it will last, he is far too controlling, jealous, and untrusting (with good reason you may add) for her to enjoy being closeted up with him every day. She values her freedom and independence, I think she will lose that once he has her ion his house, under his terms...he is already super controlling about their relationship from afar... They also don't share interests, communicate well, or engage in any meaningful way that I can see. She continues to be petulant and disengaged when they video chat, she spends most of the time trying to get him to hang up so she can go to sleep. (Her friend tell same it's the same when i'm not around, she doesn't like the BF either) However, people, especially young people, do need to learn by experience, I can't tell her she won't succeed with him, she has to find out for herself. It may take her a year, but frankly I think 6 months will do it. Will I wait for her...no. I will move on with my life, if I happen to be free when she concludes this relationship, well, I'll see what happens...but I'm not putting my life on hold for her. Is she amazing...yes Do I love her... I think so... Yeah...I do. C'est la vie Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 25, 2016 Author Share Posted January 25, 2016 Post two-minute edit: My nickname for her? My Little Tornado (She came into my life and turned everything upside down) Or... The Impossible Dream. Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 25, 2016 Author Share Posted January 25, 2016 Three more days with her until she returns to Vietnam for a month... After that? Who knows... Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 26, 2016 Author Share Posted January 26, 2016 Last night...something profound happened.. I've never seen this before...but I think I saw the moment she started to fall in love. There was just something about her behaviour, a subtle shift, that transformed everything. It started when in the car to get dinner, she said: "I've got to tell you something that will make you upset" She told me her period had started. I shrugged..."So? It happens right? " My reaction surprised her...I guess she thought because sex was off the agenda..somehow i'd be disappointed. I couldn't care less...I just loved spending time with her. I think she realised...with one simple reaction...I showed her my interest was more than just sexual. That night she was fixated on me...she lavished attention on me, kissing, holding me, cuddling...she gazed into my eyes, caressed my face, stroked my arms... In the morning she said: "I'm just asking okay...but if you meet someone and wanted to have children again...what would you do?" (I have a vasectomy) I told her modern micro surgery can reverse the process... Somewhere in the last day or so...she's started to fall for me.. I'm not saying that's it, but this difference is pleasing... Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted January 26, 2016 Share Posted January 26, 2016 Three more days with her until she returns to Vietnam for a month... After that? Who knows... When is her trip to India, I forget? :confused: How can she set up her own business from scratch, open on January 19th and then leave for a month right now?? Link to post Share on other sites
ses Posted January 26, 2016 Share Posted January 26, 2016 ^She's returning to Vietnam. So she's still with her boyfriend, and you're okay with that? I hope you're not expecting anything long-term with her as she seems to only want a warm body next to her while she plans her own life. Don't wait for her. She doesn't know what she wants. I'm sure there are plenty of local women available for a relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 26, 2016 Author Share Posted January 26, 2016 When is her trip to India, I forget? :confused: How can she set up her own business from scratch, open on January 19th and then leave for a month right now?? Yeah, the timing of the shop came down to lease availability, not much she could do, she has a business partner to run the shop for the month (technically less than 4 weeks) while she is in Vietnam on holiday books ages ago. Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 26, 2016 Author Share Posted January 26, 2016 (edited) ^She's returning to Vietnam. So she's still with her boyfriend, and you're okay with that? I hope you're not expecting anything long-term with her as she seems to only want a warm body next to her while she plans her own life. Don't wait for her. She doesn't know what she wants. I'm sure there are plenty of local women available for a relationship. Her BF is not Vietnamese, or in Vietnam, this is a family reunion holiday... Her BF is Indian, in India. He is going to Vietnam for a few days to see her, then back to Vietnam. However, her current thinking is still to go off with him, the timing of this is still up in the air, originally it was "a few months" after her return from Vietnam, she would go to India, then New Zealand, and basically abandon her business... Seems that time has been brought forward, with BF coming to Melbourne soon after her return... Yes, I know she wants me for my company, sex, and friendship...I have no illusions about that. My gut feeling is she will go off with him no matter what feelings have started to develop for me...I am prepared for that, she has never given me any false hopes in that regard. But this week, her last week in Melbourne I am staying with her every day. Every day she chats to her boyfriend in the same way, total disinterest, if I was her bf, I'd not put up with the petulant nature, and tone of voice, I'd be asking what the hell is wrong...he just laughs obviously and goes on about: His money His day His interests Her body, or other aspects of her physical self: "Have you had a shower...I can tell...your hair is wet" "Show me your naked body" (Now, I've known her intimately for far less time than he has and I know she is a very, very private girl about sex and nudity, she would NEVER show her body on video chat...when he asked she got very angry with him and slammed the phone down....) Which only serves to support my theory...she is not happy with her BF, but family pressures and...inertia, mean she is going along with it anyway... She started her business knowing what her plans were, subconsciously perhaps, she doesn't want to go ahead with it... If I felt he was a good match for her, I'd walk away without a care, I'll miss her, of course, but I'd at least have a fond memory, and know she's OK. But he isn't, he is obsessed, jealous, controlling and demanding. BUT That's her decision, I can't change her mind be simply pointing these things out. She is a proud stubborn girl, in her mind it's worth the attempt at a life with him. "I'm young enough to make mistake, waste time" My HOPE, my 1% chance, is to simply be me, be close to her, and let her feeling grow... I know they are, her affection, kissing, and other subtle signs of deep emotion are growing daily. The fact that we can TALK, unlike her bf who just fills the air with pointless words, is a huge difference to her, she has said that exact thing to me. So that's it, I have 2 more nights with her in my arms, (literally, she sleeps the whole night lying in my arms with her head on my chest, first time I've ever encountered that, she's a small girl, 44kg, so it works beautifully). Two more nights to let her love for me develop... If it isn't enough, if she still goes ahead with this farcical relationship, I'll move on, I'm not waiting for her, and told her bluntly. She said: "If you love me, you'll wait for me" "No, I am not putting my life on hold for you, you either choose now, or lose me...I have more pride and self-respect than that" So she knows it's a one time choice. In reality, if her relationship all goes pear shaped in a few months as I predict, well, it will be hard for me to not want to see her, regardless of what I'm currently doing or who I am involved with... Edited January 26, 2016 by yxalitis Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted January 26, 2016 Share Posted January 26, 2016 But he isn't, he is obsessed, jealous, controlling and demanding. I hope you're not going to seriously that you aren't, because all four traits are displayed pretty heavily in what comes before and after that sentence, particularly the "obsessed" part. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 26, 2016 Author Share Posted January 26, 2016 I hope you're not going to seriously that you aren't, because all four traits are displayed pretty heavily in what comes before and after that sentence, particularly the "obsessed" part. Obsessed, no...Jesus you serious? How am I obsessed? I don't call her 20 times in a row (In fact I might call her once every couple of days if I need to ask her something). I text her in response to her texts, or again if I have something specific to tell/ask her. I am seeing her this week upon mutual agreement that it's a good idea to use the time to keep each other company, I'm still working full days, getting up same time, I don't go around until 8:00 pm after I've done my exercise and talking to friends etc. Calling me "obsessed" is ludicrous! Jealous..of her bf? Not now, I have her, he doesn't. When/if that changes, yeah, for sure...but I'll get over it. Controlling? Nope, letting her make her decisions in her life... Demanding?...never. Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted January 27, 2016 Share Posted January 27, 2016 However, her current thinking is still to go off with him, the timing of this is still up in the air, originally it was "a few months" after her return from Vietnam, she would go to India, then New Zealand, and basically abandon her business... Her brand new business that she just opened up less than two weeks ago? And she did a build out on the space and everything?? :eek: Wow. She must be really really rich if she can just throw that away. Also unstable. Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 27, 2016 Author Share Posted January 27, 2016 Her brand new business that she just opened up less than two weeks ago? And she did a build out on the space and everything?? :eek: Wow. She must be really really rich if she can just throw that away. Also unstable. She says she will "run it from overseas" but that can't possibly work... That's why I think she really is trying to find a way to stay, but battling with her own stubbornness. She's not unstable, but certainly confused. Link to post Share on other sites
Aniela Posted January 27, 2016 Share Posted January 27, 2016 ^^meh, sounds like projection to me. At every stage of my life, I have never had a problem finding exuberant, optimistic people to spend time with. That is not an age thing at all... Difference is, I don't feel the need to have sex with them to prove something, or keep them in my life. That's not love to me. In fact, I have a hard time calling the large age gap relationships 'love' at all. More like some kind of acting out and running away... From something. To me, as well. I know I still have that sense of spark and wonderment - it's just dulled by things like these attitudes about women over 30, whenever I run into them. Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted January 27, 2016 Share Posted January 27, 2016 She's not unstable, but certainly confused. How did she get the money to start it? Link to post Share on other sites
MidwestUSA Posted January 27, 2016 Share Posted January 27, 2016 I have to wonder if this girl and her BF are somehow planning to try and scam OP. It's all too strange, her cheating on her BF in his presence, even if by Skype. Weird. And why would anyone want to be involved with a cheater? 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 27, 2016 Author Share Posted January 27, 2016 I have to wonder if this girl and her BF are somehow planning to try and scam OP. It's all too strange, her cheating on her BF in his presence, even if by Skype. Weird. And why would anyone want to be involved with a cheater? Yeah...I'm the target of a complicated scam...Jesus get a grip! Just like all those HK girls out to scam me...right? Exactly how would this work..explain to me...I'm curious. And my views on cheating are far less....traditional...than most. Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 27, 2016 Author Share Posted January 27, 2016 How did she get the money to start it? By working 60 hours a week and saving... Link to post Share on other sites
MidwestUSA Posted January 27, 2016 Share Posted January 27, 2016 Yeah...I'm the target of a complicated scam...Jesus get a grip! Just like all those HK girls out to scam me...right? Exactly how would this work..explain to me...I'm curious. And my views on cheating are far less....traditional...than most. We saw the Hong Kong girls and know what they were about. As long as you're okay with 'if she'll cheat with you, she'll cheat on you', and it sounds like you are, then all is well. Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted January 27, 2016 Share Posted January 27, 2016 Yeah...I'm the target of a complicated scam...Jesus get a grip! Just like all those HK girls out to scam me...right? Exactly how would this work..explain to me...I'm curious. And my views on cheating are far less....traditional...than most. Well xylitol it really does sound sketchy and unsavory all the way around. I understand that you are obsessed with this girl but ... I think she is a prostitute, to put it bluntly. That's the message I'm getting from all your posts. You're probably fine with that except then why are you going to such lengths? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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