Author JayD Posted October 10, 2015 Author Share Posted October 10, 2015 Why ?? What do you mean by this??? I'm just saying that its more likely pure guilts...i mean six months have passed it's bizarre that still feels guilty lol I don't know why, but this made me burst out laughing and my eyes watered a little.. LOL! I should try that wording out on an ex haha. "I know this is out of the blue, but i'm experiencing some major erotic concern for you!" Stick with NC, spend time with your new gf, and keep working on yourself. The less you talk to her, the easier it gets (tho it doesnt feel like it at the time) Link to post Share on other sites
marcusdevilliers Posted October 12, 2015 Share Posted October 12, 2015 No disrespect here bro. But this bit*h is crazy man. If she still contacts u anytime put her on blast. Tell her if she doesn't stop your taking her to court. She's just a leach in your life. Your doing well and I know what it's like to be dumped the way u did. I haven't received any contact from my ex, and if I do I hope I can handle it the way u did. Things will woek out, try to permanently get rid of her. And if it goes to the extent of legal action Do it. She left you, she wasn't there for you, she didn't even try to make things work. U have moved on and I'm sure ur happy without her. So keep up the good work. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JayD Posted November 16, 2015 Author Share Posted November 16, 2015 Ok guys she keeps going. Last message was that she is happy that im ok and im doing good etc. She even made a cover picture with her new boyfriend. She texted me at sunday (she never texts at weekends) just a plain "can you answer me a question"? Seriously, any lady can give us her lights and womanly opinion? Its been 7 months, she broke up with me. She found a new guy in one month and she keeps texting me every month 1-3 messages. Last month i really believed it was her last message due to guilts but she keeps doing it. Link to post Share on other sites
qubist Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 Ok guys she keeps going. Last message was that she is happy that im ok and im doing good etc. She even made a cover picture with her new boyfriend. She texted me at sunday (she never texts at weekends) just a plain "can you answer me a question"? Seriously, any lady can give us her lights and womanly opinion? Its been 7 months, she broke up with me. She found a new guy in one month and she keeps texting me every month 1-3 messages. Last month i really believed it was her last message due to guilts but she keeps doing it. do not worry too much about why she won't stop texting you, not even her can answer that question. I think she needs an attention from you, why? who knows. my guess is that she regrets loosing you after finding out that the grass on the other side wasn't that green. or maybe she is not secure with the new guy and needs you as a back up plan. it could be just her insecurities playing on her mind. She could be also seeking an ego boost that she thinks she would get if you tell her that you still love her. here is a question for you, do you still have any feelings for her? if no just disregard the messages like nothing happened. if yes, do her messages bother you and you feel they keep you attached to her? if No keep disregarding them. if yes block her off, or change your number Link to post Share on other sites
Author JayD Posted November 16, 2015 Author Share Posted November 16, 2015 do not worry too much about why she won't stop texting you, not even her can answer that question. I think she needs an attention from you, why? who knows. my guess is that she regrets loosing you after finding out that the grass on the other side wasn't that green. or maybe she is not secure with the new guy and needs you as a back up plan. it could be just her insecurities playing on her mind. She could be also seeking an ego boost that she thinks she would get if you tell her that you still love her. here is a question for you, do you still have any feelings for her? if no just disregard the messages like nothing happened. if yes, do her messages bother you and you feel they keep you attached to her? if No keep disregarding them. if yes block her off, or change your number I do care for her, but what we had is gone i cant see her the same way i did. The "in love" thingy is gone. But that insisting keeps me worried. I never answer to any of her messages. But the last one i felt it like threating me, like she made that question in order to make a point for something i did wrong. That line "can i ask you something?" was always a "man you are fked" question. Link to post Share on other sites
MovingOnIsHard Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 I do care for her, but what we had is gone i cant see her the same way i did. The "in love" thingy is gone. But that insisting keeps me worried. I never answer to any of her messages. But the last one i felt it like threating me, like she made that question in order to make a point for something i did wrong. That line "can i ask you something?" was always a "man you are fked" question. Just saw this thread. I can relate to your situation very well. My ex was doing the same thing... Until he crossed the line and i had to report him to the cops for stalking. He knew i was happy with my current bf but he didnt listen when i told him to stop contacting me. Some people just have loser mentalities.. They want what they cant have and they are miserable when other people are happier than they are. I say just keep ignoring her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JayD Posted November 16, 2015 Author Share Posted November 16, 2015 Just saw this thread. I can relate to your situation very well. My ex was doing the same thing... Until he crossed the line and i had to report him to the cops for stalking. He knew i was happy with my current bf but he didnt listen when i told him to stop contacting me. Some people just have loser mentalities.. They want what they cant have and they are miserable when other people are happier than they are. I say just keep ignoring her. But she has a bf!!!! What the hell she want from me? Link to post Share on other sites
MovingOnIsHard Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 But she has a bf!!!! What the hell she want from me? Lol my ex had gf's here and there too and that didnt stop him. The thing is, your ex cant help but commiserate that you also have a gf and happy with her. What does she want from you? Attention. Any kind, whether negative or positive. She engages with you because she knows in the past you have replied back to her... Even if you just said "leave me alone". This person thrives on drama. All you can do is ignore and not say a word back to her. Eventually she will stop. Focus on your current relationship and dont give her a single thought. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JayD Posted November 16, 2015 Author Share Posted November 16, 2015 Lol my ex had gf's here and there too and that didnt stop him. The thing is, your ex cant help but commiserate that you also have a gf and happy with her. What does she want from you? Attention. Any kind, whether negative or positive. She engages with you because she knows in the past you have replied back to her... Even if you just said "leave me alone". This person thrives on drama. All you can do is ignore and not say a word back to her. Eventually she will stop. Focus on your current relationship and dont give her a single thought. Still, she has a relationship and seems to be what she ever wanted. Trying to get attention from me has no meaning, she can get from elsewhere and positive one. If she really did regret somewhat, who would sent such messages ? Indeed im happy, and doing many things that i couldnt with her, many many travels, climbing, hikking, skiing etc. Link to post Share on other sites
MovingOnIsHard Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 Still, she has a relationship and seems to be what she ever wanted. Trying to get attention from me has no meaning, she can get from elsewhere and positive one. If she really did regret somewhat, who would sent such messages ? Indeed im happy, and doing many things that i couldnt with her, many many travels, climbing, hikking, skiing etc. Yeah she can get attention from other sources but she has history with you, and you were her recent ex. Think about that. Engaging with you is how she gets her kicks. I suspect she's the type of person to keep tabs on exes, "collect" them, in case she needs to fall back on them aka recycling. You are probably not the only one she engages with. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JayD Posted November 16, 2015 Author Share Posted November 16, 2015 Yeah she can get attention from other sources but she has history with you, and you were her recent ex. Think about that. Engaging with you is how she gets her kicks. I suspect she's the type of person to keep tabs on exes, "collect" them, in case she needs to fall back on them aka recycling. You are probably not the only one she engages with. Why would someone engage contact if you are happy with what you have. Still its strange that she keeps sending, even tho i was aggresive at the start not sending then i kept ignoring her. She even promised be her own that would not contact me again since she seen im happy and good with my life. And that actually made sense since i believed that all that contact was driven by guilts even tho i told her i fogirve both of us for what happened and there is no problem and all good many times. Link to post Share on other sites
qubist Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 jayD, you are looking at things from your logic not hers, the analogy oh "what would I do in this case" doesn't always apply. Human behavior is a lot more complicated. I bet sh can't answer the question why she is contacting you. In addition, how did assume that she is happy in her relationship? If you tell me because she said so or her profile picture you will be again using the same analogy which is not always correct. Like I said before, you shouldn't worry too much about her attempts to contact you unless they get to the point where you are annoyed by them 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author JayD Posted November 16, 2015 Author Share Posted November 16, 2015 jayD, you are looking at things from your logic not hers, the analogy oh "what would I do in this case" doesn't always apply. Human behavior is a lot more complicated. I bet sh can't answer the question why she is contacting you. In addition, how did assume that she is happy in her relationship? If you tell me because she said so or her profile picture you will be again using the same analogy which is not always correct. Like I said before, you shouldn't worry too much about her attempts to contact you unless they get to the point where you are annoyed by them 2 months ago when she insisted to get an answer from me stated that is from pure human interest if im doing ok with my health and my life and its all good. I said that im ok and my well being is not in your interest since we are not together and even when we were together you werent there for me. And that i know your main reason you text is from guilts im forgiving you both me and you. Stop texting what you do is wrong mainly for your current relationship. She got all mad from my responce. Then texted again when i reopened my fb profile (with happy pictures, travels etc) stating that she is happy to see me again and she wont text me again since im all good. After a month tada there she is again, but without any kidness (her previous messages were kind) but a threating question. I like to have control and to know, as better as i can, to know what the hell is going on generally in my life. And tbh sometimes this is furstrating So i asked your opinions from your expiriences for the insisting and the way she insists. Link to post Share on other sites
qubist Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 In my opinion she wants your reaction and interest. Why? Nobody knows. She probably has something in her chest that she wants out desperately. My curiosity wants me to to ask you to tell her what the question is but I believe for your own sake just keep ignoring her. Unless you are too curious too:lmao: Link to post Share on other sites
Author JayD Posted November 16, 2015 Author Share Posted November 16, 2015 In my opinion she wants your reaction and interest. Why? Nobody knows. She probably has something in her chest that she wants out desperately. My curiosity wants me to to ask you to tell her what the question is but I believe for your own sake just keep ignoring her. Unless you are too curious too:lmao: Well I'm also way too curious as a person. And curiosity coming from an ex makes it even more. If she wanted something answered why not send the question as it is? Regrets? Guilts (again?)? And why is still interested keeping contact with me and wants to know what I'm doing? What do you all think what is the most probably reason? Link to post Share on other sites
qubist Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 I don't know why she is doing it but I guarantee you that if she was in a good satisfying relationship with her current boyfriend she wouldn't have contacted you so desperately Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 Well I'm also way too curious as a person. And curiosity coming from an ex makes it even more. If she wanted something answered why not send the question as it is? Regrets? Guilts (again?)? And why is still interested keeping contact with me and wants to know what I'm doing? What do you all think what is the most probably reason? When she texted asking "Can I ask you a question?". She wanted to spell out the reason why she broke up with you. If you would have said, "Sure, go ahead". I promise you it would have been along the lines of Why didn't YOU do this, that or the other when we were together. Basically, she probably wanted YOU to realize that it was YOUR actions or inactions is what forced her hand to end things with you. Which is utter BS, but she probably wanted to justify ending the relationship and for you to understand what that reason was. That it was YOUR fault and not hers. Again, utter BS. Affirming her justifications and easing her guilt. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author JayD Posted November 16, 2015 Author Share Posted November 16, 2015 Why even bother? We already talked of why we ended. Why bother to repeat herself again after month. Why is so eager to initiate talk with me? She found out I'm really good why keep sending without any reason, I doubt it's from guilt now Link to post Share on other sites
Silver_star Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 Why even bother? We already talked of why we ended. Why bother to repeat herself again after month. Why is so eager to initiate talk with me? She found out I'm really good why keep sending without any reason, I doubt it's from guilt now It's for her own ego. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JayD Posted November 16, 2015 Author Share Posted November 16, 2015 It's for her own ego. I highly doubt, its been almost 3 months since got any reaction from me lol Link to post Share on other sites
Injen Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 This is obviously effecting you, and I feel like its not fair to your current girlfriend that you are putting so much effort in trying to analyze why a ex-gf is texting you for so long. I suggest you listen to all the advice everyone is giving you and block her from everything. That includes blocking her from texting you, if her response do not matter as much as your say then you not seeing her response will save you the time of wondering what her motives are. Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 Just block her. Problem solved. You are twisting your brain into a pretzel for no good reason. Stop. Link to post Share on other sites
Blanco Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 If you were single, this much mental energy dedicated toward what your ex's motives are would be unfair to yourself. You're with someone else now, so you're also being unfair to her. I would be hurt if I found out someone I was in a relationship with was this fixated on what texts from an ex meant. If you're committed to someone else, your ex's intent should be of little to no concern to you. I agree with others: Block her. It's inappropriate to still be this engaged with an ex while you're with someone else. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author JayD Posted November 17, 2015 Author Share Posted November 17, 2015 You are right guys, i was mainly curious as a person. I just keep ignoring her Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted November 17, 2015 Share Posted November 17, 2015 I highly doubt, its been almost 3 months since got any reaction from me lol Then, that's what it is exactly. Three months have gone by. The honeymoon phase of her new relationship is wearing off and things are starting to normalize for her. therefore, she's had time to think. She's thought about how crappy she treated you and wants you to ease her guilt. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts