Ex texted after 3 months

[Morphine]

Well lets wait and see her next move, if there will be.

In 5 days 3 messages and 1 phone call! Altho she did fked up my mood, i had an ego boost

 

Try not to think too much about this. I know it is hard, because I am over analysing every single thing my ex did in the past few weeks....it kills me lol

[seasickpeeve]

I'd guess this is to help rid her of any guilt she might be feeling and to know that you are still there. I have done this myself before without realising when I was the dumper but instead of a 'feeling' I had it was a 'dream'. I thought I was being a kind and caring person checking in on him but in hindsight I was trying to keep him friendly so I felt better about what I had done. And because I cared about him of course.

 

That's only my experience and she may be feeling different but I'd say if she wanted anything from you she would want to meet and say that in person.

[aloneinaz]

In my opinion, her contact was simply a means to get her ego stroked. I've been the dumper in most of my relationships. When the dumped simply vanish, as the dumper, you become curious and wonder if you're plan B or security blanket (the dumped) have moved on. It feels GOOD to know your last ex is pining for you and wants you. As a dumper, you start to get a bit concerned that they are gone for good. You then send out a "feeler" text to see if they are still pining for you. They are hoping for a reply and that the person confesses they miss them, etc.. Once they get that validation, they disappear again.

 

 

My last ex dumped me. I VANISHED from her life. She never heard from me again. I moved on and had a new girl friend when this dumper re-appeared 6 months later.

 

 

Here's what she did.

 

 

She first stopped by my house to apologize for her poor behavior while we dated. I was napping but heard the door.

 

 

The next night she send a long, apologetic text, telling me she stopped by the day before. She didn't say she wanted me back, just that she felt "guilty" about what a bad GF she was. I ignored her.

 

 

Two weeks later, she sent a long email stating "I'm trying to reach you". Again, apologizing and NOW telling me she made a horrible mistake, missed me, would love another chance, blah, blah, blah.. I ignored her until my GF suggested letting her know I'd moved on and good luck.

 

 

Again, this dumper was looking for an ego stroke and she wanted the comfort of knowing there was still someone out there wanting her. By ignoring her, you're knocking her chip off her shoulder. "If" she contacts you again with a direct, "I made a mistake" and want you back" contact, then decide if you want to recycle a failed relationship that has a massively high failure rate if you tried again. Personally, my vote would be to keep ignoring her. She had her chance and chose to kick you to the curb. Find someone new and recognize all you healing you've already done.

 

 

Also, understand one thing. She had the power to end the relationship, which is her right. You now have the power and control back as to if you ever want to engage with her and consider dating her again. It's like the table have turned to some degree. Use it to find a new girl who rocks your world.

Edited July 24, 2015 by aloneinaz

[Chi townD]

Dude, she's pulling on the leash to see if the dog is still there. If she was THAT concerned; you dated for 2 years, I'm pretty sure she knows where you live. She could come over and check for herself and not play phone tag.

[lauri]

This is so typical it is not even funny. She can't stand the fact you hate her.

 

I'm glad you have ignored her. She's gonna try a few more times. Want to know my thoughts? She's having a weak moment. Minute she gets your attention, she will turn cold again and cut you off again.

 

She's not looking to get back, yet. She may result in that type of conversation to get your attention, but don't be fooled. In my opinion, when an ex loses interest it is lost forever. They never, ever, forget why they left you or why they stopped loving you. To regain that love / spark, it takes so much work.

 

My ex did similar things to me. I found out why - mainly because she couldn't get the guy she left me for to commit. Also, couldn't find anyone better. But seriously, how would she even respect me if I took her back? I know I wouldn't be respecting myself if I let a girl back into my life to settle for me.

 

Do what you must man, but just be careful. Protect yourself first. My suggestion is don't speak to her again and spend this time finding someone new.

[mightycpa]

Gold stars all the way around JayD!

 

The first two words of her text tell you everything you need to know.

 

I want to know you are doing well

 

People in hell want ice water. They don't get it either.

[Marco Valerio]

If you feel she wasn't there for you during the relationship, then I agree with you to keep no contact. The chances are that she will do it again after a while if you reconnect, or maybe not. You know better than us, but if she was a self-centered person...then keep NC.

[BriNyc82]

SHE needs to know if you are ok? SHE needs to know that you are all right. Who cares what she wants? What happened to what you wanted and she wasn't there for you? Definitely seems selfish to me. She told you to basically leave her alone and you did. Be careful what you wish for! It could be a guilt thing or she could be having an "oh crap" moment maybe he really has moved on.....

[JayD]

I didn't respond anything all the messages she send seem to so manipulative.

 

I have no idea her intentions, we did some kind of contact 1 month ago, randomly. We didn't exchange anything just a glimpse.

 

She demanded to leaver her alone aggressively and not text her again, just disappear not even at birthdays etc and after a while you send such crap?

 

Funny story short, all her female friends got married she is the only one that isn't. Her last friend got married few days ago !

 

Good luck finding someone that can put up with her ****.

[aloneinaz]

I didn't respond anything all the messages she send seem to so manipulative.

 

I have no idea her intentions, we did some kind of contact 1 month ago, randomly. We didn't exchange anything just a glimpse.

 

She demanded to leaver her alone aggressively and not text her again, just disappear not even at birthdays etc and after a while you send such crap?

 

Funny story short, all her female friends got married she is the only one that isn't. Her last friend got married few days ago !

 

Good luck finding someone that can put up with her ****.

 

 

How dare you NOT reply to her! She WANTED to know how you are and you defied her DEMAND! She told you to f-off and never bother her again and then she contacted you again so soon? She's clearly a very selfish, all about her person.

 

 

It will feel SSOO good to ignore her if I was you. She has to be livid that you have the audacity to disrespect her like that!!

 

 

Good job!!

[JayD]

Only thing i don't get is why she wouldn't also write me happy birthday since she did send that day.

 

And she knew it was my birthday.

[Popsicle]

You did the right thing. Love the way you've handled this. You deserve better.

[mightycpa]

Only thing i don't get is why she wouldn't also write me happy birthday since she did send that day.

What better way to play a game with you than to leave you with a riddle that only she knows the answer to?

 

Luckily, JayD, I know the answer to the riddle too: who cares?

[JayD]

Guys, she keeps texting time to time, early of August send me pictures of our dog at her vacations. I texted her to leave me alone since i moved on and i don't want my gf to see her my ex texting.

 

And she send again yesterday asking me how i am and such...and funny thing she uploaded a cover photo with her new boyfriend and some public pictures of our dog that was planning for the noon walk.(i still have her blocked and never bothered to unblock her there is no reason, i don't care).

Seriously i think she does all this on purpose to get a reaction from me.

 

She made official her new RS and after few days you text me ?

 

I told her aggressively to leave me alone.

 

What the fk she wants from me ? It's furstrating

[Oregon_Dude]

This thread was "before my time". Glad to see you've handled everything like a man.

 

As far as her continuing to bug you, you've done what you need to, which is tell her to leave you alone. Now you should block her on all avenues.

 

I feel pretty good about the way I handled being broken up with, and not having replied to her stupid breadcrumb. Only mistake I made was telling her to have a happy (early) birthday, but that was in an email regarding money she owed me that she had initiated. She had also sent me a photo of herself in some weird, misguided moment. Anyway, I hope she's getting nailed by someone 10 times richer than me

 

Good job OP, stay strong.

[Simon Phoenix]

Guys, she keeps texting time to time, early of August send me pictures of our dog at her vacations. I texted her to leave me alone since i moved on and i don't want my gf to see her my ex texting.

 

And she send again yesterday asking me how i am and such...and funny thing she uploaded a cover photo with her new boyfriend and some public pictures of our dog that was planning for the noon walk.(i still have her blocked and never bothered to unblock her there is no reason, i don't care).

Seriously i think she does all this on purpose to get a reaction from me.

 

She made official her new RS and after few days you text me ?

 

I told her aggressively to leave me alone.

 

What the fk she wants from me ? It's furstrating

 

Time to block dude. She obviously isn't listening to you, so you have to cut it off by blocking her access to you.

[JayD]

Time to block dude. She obviously isn't listening to you, so you have to cut it off by blocking her access to you.

 

I have blocked her email, sms, phones, facebook, viber, whatsapp but she send from a new mail.

 

 

 

What the fk she wants. I cant justify any reason for doing this.

She even posted a cover photo with her new boyfriend etc. Why is she bothering me ? I did all i had to do.

[JayD]

Any suggestions of why would she keep contacting ?

And in what other ways i can handle it ?

[clam]

Any suggestions of why would she keep contacting ?

 

How about, she's a psycho?

 

I think you've handled this whole thing remarkably well. I think she can't stand the fact that she doesn't get to call the shots anymore, snap her fingers and make you jump.

 

You could consider taking out a restraining order on her, although that seems a bit excessive. But I think it would put an end to any further contact.

[NoLeafClover]

She really fked up things,

 

She even told her parent to phone me to leave her alone.

And now she is texting me?

 

Damn, what the hell is wrong with this girl.

 

Contact her parents tell them to tell their daughter to leave you alone. Just how she put you in blast, it is time to give her a taste of her own medicine.

[Chi townD]

Any suggestions of why would she keep contacting ?

And in what other ways i can handle it ?

 

 

Yeah, she was with you for two years. She dumps you, you try to get her back. She says no and gets her parents to call you and tell you to leave her alone.

 

 

Then, she lets her RS go public and then starts to contact you because she thought you would be sooo devastated that she thought you might do something "drastic and stupid". Dude, it's all guilt driven.

[JayD]

Yeah, she was with you for two years. She dumps you, you try to get her back. She says no and gets her parents to call you and tell you to leave her alone.

 

 

Then, she lets her RS go public and then starts to contact you because she thought you would be sooo devastated that she thought you might do something "drastic and stupid". Dude, it's all guilt driven.

 

I know about her RS for 2 months now, and she knows i know it.

I repeatedly told her to stop contacting me.

Plus she keeps posting at public photographs etc at her profile, thing she never did. Like she does it on purpose.

[Chi townD]

I know about her RS for 2 months now, and she knows i know it.

I repeatedly told her to stop contacting me.

Plus she keeps posting at public photographs etc at her profile, thing she never did. Like she does it on purpose.

 

 

 

Well yeah, NOW she's doing that. And you're right. It's on purpose. You won't respond to her. So, she ramping up the post with the mindset that it will get under your skin and you'll contact her. You might put her on blast, but she at least, got you to respond.

[clam]

I know about her RS for 2 months now, and she knows i know it.

I repeatedly told her to stop contacting me.

 

STOP repeatedly telling her not to contact you!!!

 

Visit your local police department, tell them you think she is psychotic and you fear for your life because she won't stop contacting you after repeated efforts. Use those EXACT words (very important -- "fear for your life")

 

That will end all contact. Unless she wants to face Felony stalking charges.

 

Don't play this cat and mouse game any longer. She is taunting you. ANY response from you is just falling into the trap.

[JayD]

I cant understand her behavior.

What is she trying to accomplish, she is happy with her rs why is still looking back?

 

Dragging her to the Police is a bit overkill :-P