What is My Best Course of Action Here

[Robert Z]

But escorts don't want to *actually* travel. They want to fly to resort #1006 and go shopping at the local mall while suntanning by the pool.

 

 

When i do find people open to real travel, it's always "someday" and then they have this or that keeping them from being gone for more than a week.

 

I need someone who wants to *see* things and livr places, not someone who wants to sit in hotels and do toursit stuff.

 

I feel like !ore people who are not from the States are more closely aligned with what im looking for.

 

Maybe Elaine was right..? i should leave

 

What about seeking out common ground with the adventure crowd - skydivers, bungee jumpers, wing suits, etc. Maybe there are meetup groups or the like where you could meet women who do these things. They tend to be more the free-spirit types.

 

 

My new sb is a total adventure nut. She doesn't do shopping when she travels. For example, she went to Machu Picchu, which is quite an ordeal and takes a dedicated traveler! She has done bungee and is going skydiving. I would bet someone like her would be more in line with your goals.

[SycamoreCircle]

I feel like some other parts of this thread are superfluous because I feel you need to develop a better sense of self-validation before you can attract the sort of person I intuit you dream of.

 

Know that no matter what you do in your life, you are an important and complete person capable of great works and great flaws. Some things didn't work out. That's to be expected. You've driven some people away. You've overcompensated. You've underestimated other people's value of you. That's a tremendous insult to other people's intelligence, to their station in life. We've all been guilty of it, though.

 

Here's the true test of your self-worth: can you value the people around you? Is the person you're talking to at the grocery store an interesting, faceted person? The depth at which you can value the people and offerings around you, is the depth of value which you contain for other people.

[Phoe]

When I was a younger, my dad and I "traveled"

 

Sure, it was never out of California, but we packed up the back of his truck with a tent, tools, firewood, fishing poles and some other basic stuff, and took off for the summer.

 

We'd camp on beaches, we'd camp by rivers, we'd go to mountains, rivers, deserts, forests. We lived very minimalistically, and in a sense I grew up as a bit of a survivalist.

 

I had to catch dinner before I could cook dinner. I had to filet that dinner before I could cook dinner.

 

I have always dreamed of just taking off. A friend and I always talked about catching a plane to Europe and just backpacking our way around, going where we could, living by any means.

 

But then life got in the way. Finances, really, are what keep me stuck. Maybe I could save up a small amount and then wing it, but that would be risky. No one would ever see me and think of me as someone who wants to travel, because I don't travel. Because it has never been an option. Keeping a roof over my head and food in my stomach were always the only things I could think of.

 

Just a thought I suppose. There are people out there who would take well to such a lifestyle, but don't openly express that desire, because they figure it could never be attainable. A dream of sorts, but never a reality. For all you know there's a woman down the road from you that would be right for it, but you'd never even know.

[Mrin]

Maybe Elaine was right..? i should leave

 

This. I am not 100% certain of your story but IIRC it involves a boat and going places on that boat. To me that says a wandering, nomadic journey. A Big Explore. So go start your Big Explore and see who you find along the way. You now how this goes, once you get traveling like that all sorts of opportunities and amazing people start showing up in your life.

 

Surrender yourself to the Universe and see what happens. And be sure to take us along virtually for the ride!

 

Mrin

[loveweary11]

Respect that then. Everyone gives up something or other when they blend into a relationship. So when I talk about buy-in, that means financially and spiritually, purpose and self-actualization.

 

And I agree that the Four Seasons is pretty much the same in every location.

 

The part I bolded is key to me. That is absolutely right- everyone has ties of some sort. Our former nanny has ties and plans. She isn't ready or able to "be gone" for more than a week without purpose. That's where you need to adjust and be realistic. Nanny just left S America for Africa and had fallen for a guy in S America who can't "just be gone." They hadn't had enough time and foundation invested yet to justify either of them giving up their plans. Maybe he'll do so if their relationship deepens over time. Maybe not. So I think you need to create the tie first and then plan the future, with this as something you'd share later.

 

Flip roles and consider what it would take for you to give up what you have in place for something or someone else. For instance, why aren't you in London right now? See what I mean?

 

I grt it, but I do need to skip over the vast majority of people who don't travel.

 

That's the main point.

 

The thread was asking where to find more of these type, not if I should be finding them. My mind is already made up. I'm not going back to corporate and I know there are others like me out there who would appreciate what I have to offer.

 

Not a whole lot of people have things in place at the level of what has me stuck here a few more weeks. Bad example, imo. A fair number of people would love to quit their boring job and travel. I know I would have when I had one.

[loveweary11]

When I was a younger, my dad and I "traveled"

 

Sure, it was never out of California, but we packed up the back of his truck with a tent, tools, firewood, fishing poles and some other basic stuff, and took off for the summer.

 

We'd camp on beaches, we'd camp by rivers, we'd go to mountains, rivers, deserts, forests. We lived very minimalistically, and in a sense I grew up as a bit of a survivalist.

 

I had to catch dinner before I could cook dinner. I had to filet that dinner before I could cook dinner.

 

I have always dreamed of just taking off. A friend and I always talked about catching a plane to Europe and just backpacking our way around, going where we could, living by any means.

 

But then life got in the way. Finances, really, are what keep me stuck. Maybe I could save up a small amount and then wing it, but that would be risky. No one would ever see me and think of me as someone who wants to travel, because I don't travel. Because it has never been an option. Keeping a roof over my head and food in my stomach were always the only things I could think of.

 

Just a thought I suppose. There are people out there who would take well to such a lifestyle, but don't openly express that desire, because they figure it could never be attainable. A dream of sorts, but never a reality. For all you know there's a woman down the road from you that would be right for it, but you'd never even know.

 

This!!!

 

OMG, Phoe, you "get it."

 

One of the very few who have the perspective I'm talking about.

 

It's so hard to explain it to people. I do have faith that there are more people out there who get it.

 

As the thread asks, where do I find them? The answer is, I suppose, they are everywhere?

 

This is a very encouraging post. Thank you. Maybe the more people you meet in general and the more you talk about the life, the more the potential to run acrosd one who would enjoy this.

 

Now I understand your minimalist stuff better as well, as you probably understand mine. It stems from the same place/outlook.

Edited July 2, 2015 by loveweary11

[Phoe]

This!!!

 

OMG, Phoe, you "get it."

 

One of the very few who have the perspective I'm talking about.

 

It's so hard to explain it to people. I do have faith that there are more people out there who get it.

 

As the thread asks, where do I find them? The answer is, I suppose, they are everywhere?

 

This is a very encouraging post. Thank you. Maybe the more people you meet in general and the more you talk about the life, the more the potential to run acrosd one who would enjoy this.

 

I'm glad I could help, hoped it would!

 

I definitely say that deliberately placing yourself in places where you are increasing the likelihood of meeting such a person, obviously, increases the chances!

 

But, there are also people you see everyday, just out and about, who understand that lifestyle, but aren't currently living it.

 

Do you have a timeframe for when you will be all set to take off? Until that point in time comes, do make a point of reaching out to find like-minded people, but if that does not happen where you currently are, don't let that hinder your plans. Take off anyway, and meet people along the way.

[Phoe]

I studied Archaeology in college, and was so enamored with studying various cultures, loved the idea of actually living and experiencing the things I was studying.

 

During the summer, many of the archaeology professors took trips to a variety of different places, and students who could afford it would go with them.

 

My professor was going to Turkey during one summer, and I could not go. It would've been over $1000 out of pocket and I was already working 2 jobs and barely able to afford groceries.

 

I remember being so sad when school started again and everyone gushed about the amazing time, what a wonderful experience it was excavating in various sites. I had to settle for examining the pieces that were brought back, instead of having been there during their discovery.

 

It felt terrible... I actually felt inadequate, like I couldn't relate to those who had been there, despite how badly I wished I could have been.

[loveweary11]

Wow. Same here.

 

I had the same experience in college. Everyone went on spring break, went overseas for this or that. It wasn't until my internship at the end of college did I get to go because NASA paid for me to go to Switzerland. That was my first trip out of the country.

 

I was existing on Ramen noodles and whatever food they gave away at the dining hall I worked at, plus working about 20-30 hrs a week.

 

From that moment on.... from that one trip, everything went big for me. My college life was, however, exactly like yours up until that Switzerland trip.

 

 

I'm not sure when I'm leaving. I wanted to continue east coast drifting for another year to gather up extra money and get the boat perfect. ... and hopefully find someone to go with. Lots of flexibility...

Edited July 2, 2015 by loveweary11

[Tread Carefully]

You sound a lot like me. My friends call me Gypsy because I'm always off on an adventure somewhere. I don't like being tied to one place. I'm a nature photographer so I am always looking for and going to places to discover. I've been all over the US. International is next on the list!

 

I know what you mean though. It's hard to find someone who can risk being carefree, spontaneous, loves challenges and remembers that life is supposed to be an adventure...not a day job.

 

Fortune favors the bold.

[Haydn]

LW, why not have one of those `essay` competitions?

 

In 10 sentences...

 

`What makes you the ideal traveling companion?`

 

Obviously they would have to enclose pictures.

 

And us blokes would be exempt unless we looked smashing in a bikini.

[elaine567]

You could always just advertise for a companion like this guy did...

 

“WRITER SEEKS ‘WIFE’ for a year on a tropical island.” When 25-year-old Lucy Irvine answered this ad in Time Out magazine in January 1981, her life changed forever.

 

Then & now Lucy Irvine, castaway

[Nikki Sahagin]

OP, I'm very much the girl you describe!

 

I love travel and adventure. I've been traveling solo many times. I get restless when I'm in one place for too long and I've never been big on marriage and kids (may change my mind one day, who knows?)

 

In my experiences as a traveler, there are MANY women who fit the description. MANY MANY WOMEN.

 

However, as to why you keep attracting women who don't fit your requirements. Sometimes I think it's as simple as 'opposites attract.' Most of my boyfriends have been very grounded where I'm flighty and have wanted a house, marriage and kids whereas I'm about adventure. Yet I am still drawn to this type, perhaps because they ground my whacky sense of flightishness. It might be similar for you too.

[loveweary11]

Wow, if there are 3 similar types right here, this does give me hope. Thank you for posting and showing me you *do* exist.

 

Can I ask a further question or two of you three?

 

Where do you currently live? Urban, suburban or rural area?

 

Where do you hang out? What types of places?

 

Also... how did you meet your dudes?

 

That would be very, very helpful to my situation, just so I have a rough idea of where to meet like minded people in a real world situation.

 

Also, any online spots you hang out that are more focused on the nomadic lifestyle?

[Popsicle]

I have had this proposition made to me before but I passed because I am petrified of being financially dependent on a romantic interest.

 

I do know one and she is my Yoga instructor chick. She stays in my life over the years, goes off for adventures, returns to me, goes off for adventures. She is in London for July/August (stay away, Haydn!... ha ha ha) and will be back to NYC to hang out with me for Sept Oct/Nov before I return to SoBe Miami (where she usually lives).

 

It's weird with her. She denies liking me "that way", but never lets me go. She initiates contact when I don't, we have sex every time we see each other, we have a lot of fun. But... nothing serious.

 

Why not just stick with her? She sounds perfect for you. It doesn't matter what she's saying as long as you are getting what you want. People often say the complete opposite of what they want. Their actions are what matters.

[Popsicle]

When I was a younger, my dad and I "traveled"

 

Sure, it was never out of California, but we packed up the back of his truck with a tent, tools, firewood, fishing poles and some other basic stuff, and took off for the summer.

 

We'd camp on beaches, we'd camp by rivers, we'd go to mountains, rivers, deserts, forests. We lived very minimalistically, and in a sense I grew up as a bit of a survivalist.

 

I had to catch dinner before I could cook dinner. I had to filet that dinner before I could cook dinner.

 

I have always dreamed of just taking off. A friend and I always talked about catching a plane to Europe and just backpacking our way around, going where we could, living by any means.

 

But then life got in the way. Finances, really, are what keep me stuck. Maybe I could save up a small amount and then wing it, but that would be risky. No one would ever see me and think of me as someone who wants to travel, because I don't travel. Because it has never been an option. Keeping a roof over my head and food in my stomach were always the only things I could think of.

 

Just a thought I suppose. There are people out there who would take well to such a lifestyle, but don't openly express that desire, because they figure it could never be attainable. A dream of sorts, but never a reality. For all you know there's a woman down the road from you that would be right for it, but you'd never even know.

 

Have you ever seen the movie "Wild" with Reese Witherspoon?

 

A good friend of mine loves that movie.

[loveweary11]

I have had this proposition made to me before but I passed because I am petrified of being financially dependent on a romantic interest.

 

 

 

Why not just stick with her? She sounds perfect for you. It doesn't matter what she's saying as long as you are getting what you want. People often say the complete opposite of what they want. Their actions are what matters.

 

How does the financial side not make it through properly?

 

Many people aren't getting it, so either I am not communicating it well or.. ??

 

Let me try again.

 

1) The person would have every penny they had the moment they decided to do it at the end.

2) They would have zero... absolutely no living expenses. None. No bills, no food, no clothing, unless looking for something special. It's all provided by the yacht business.

3) They are free to leave any time.

4) They could *make* money doing the yacht charters with me. So... their actual net worth would increase dramatically over a normal life where you have expenses.

 

Strictly speaking to the business side, the position is called a Stew or Stew/Mate. My ex wife had this position when we worked aboard someone else's boat for a bit. I was a deckhand and then mate on the same boat. We were a crew couple aboard a 120ft power boat.

 

This is a NORMAL position, financially speaking. They even have some TV show about it on Bravo. I can't remember the name of the show. It's the one about the boat.

 

I am looking for the right person who would want to be a romantically involved stew, basically, if you want to look at the cold, hard financial facts.

 

 

And yes.... I do plan to see where the yoga instructor and I go, but I want to still actively search.

Edited July 3, 2015 by loveweary11

[writergal]

How does the financial side not make it through properly?

 

Many people aren't getting it, so either I am not communicating it well or.. ??

 

Let me try again.

 

1) The person would have every penny they had the moment they decided to do it at the end.

2) They would have zero... absolutely no living expenses. None. No bills, no food, no clothing, unless looking for something special. It's all provided by the yacht business.

3) They are free to leave any time.

4) They could *make* money doing the yacht charters with me. So... their actual net worth would increase dramatically over a normal life where you have expenses.

 

Strictly speaking to the business side, the position is called a Stew or Stew/Mate. My ex wife had this position when we worked aboard someone else's boat for a bit. I was a deckhand and then mate on the same boat. We were a crew couple aboard a 120ft power boat.

 

This is a NORMAL position, financially speaking. They even have some TV show about it on Bravo. I can't remember the name of the show. It's the one about the boat.

 

I am looking for the right person who would want to be a romantically involved stew, basically, if you want to look at the cold, hard financial facts.

 

 

And yes.... I do plan to see where the yoga instructor and I go, but I want to still actively search.

 

So you want this woman to work on a yacht with you? As a stew? What if she doesn't want to?

 

What if she has a job that requires her to be on land occasionally?

 

I really think your expectations are unrealistic, unless the yacht company you work for hires a hot, sexy female stew whom you could potentially date? Or is it your own yacht company?

 

Either way, your plan comes across as "rich guy wants to hire a sugar baby to suit his needs" because of your plan's inflexibility, stew-speaking-wise.

 

Why not just go for that yoga instructor and propose your plan to her? She could do yoga on the yacht and offer yacht-yoga classes.

[loveweary11]

So you want this woman to work on a yacht with you? As a stew? What if she doesn't want to?

 

What if she has a job that requires her to be on land occasionally?

 

I really think your expectations are unrealistic, unless the yacht company you work for hires a hot, sexy female stew whom you could potentially date? Or is it your own yacht company?

 

Either way, your plan comes across as "rich guy wants to hire a sugar baby to suit his needs" because of your plan's inflexibility, stew-speaking-wise.

 

Why not just go for that yoga instructor and propose your plan to her? She could do yoga on the yacht and offer yacht-yoga classes.

 

I'd like that. But she's pretty flakey. I need backup plans with her.

 

As for a stranger? If she doesn't want to go, eff her. who cares? I'm only looking for cool chicks who like to travel.

 

Kinda getting pissed off here.

 

You are making insulting posts, probably out of jealousy. That's what it usually is when people say negative, derogatory things. You're probably mad you'll never see an opportunity like this.

 

FYI: I don't "work for" a yacht company. I own a yacht company and a second small business, thank you very much.

 

Now, for the normal, non troll types, I made this thread to try to figure out where i might find more cool chicks that are seeking travel and adventure in life. It'd be cool if some of you that did post about that had some tips on where to meet chicks like yourseves... especially if you live in urban, suburban or rural areas.

 

I am seeking a real person to get involved with, even if onpy temporarily, who could have the stew job if she wanted it.

 

It's pretty simple. Haters are basically jealous of the as of yet non existent girl and possibly the fact that I own 2 companies and travel while they are stuck in a rut. I have run across this a lot. Enjoy your boring lives haters. Ill be thinking of you as i breathe fresh ocean air all day, the best food Earth has to offer and a happy, well balanced, peaceful lifestyle surrounded by the beauty of nature. Enjoy those cubes.

[loveweary11]

thread can be closed. I have no idea why i ask any personal questions here....

 

Toi many attackers and haters.

[Popsicle]

How does the financial side not make it through properly?

 

Many people aren't getting it, so either I am not communicating it well or.. ??

 

Let me try again.

 

1) The person would have every penny they had the moment they decided to do it at the end.

2) They would have zero... absolutely no living expenses. None. No bills, no food, no clothing, unless looking for something special. It's all provided by the yacht business.

3) They are free to leave any time.

4) They could *make* money doing the yacht charters with me. So... their actual net worth would increase dramatically over a normal life where you have expenses.

 

Strictly speaking to the business side, the position is called a Stew or Stew/Mate. My ex wife had this position when we worked aboard someone else's boat for a bit. I was a deckhand and then mate on the same boat. We were a crew couple aboard a 120ft power boat.

 

This is a NORMAL position, financially speaking. They even have some TV show about it on Bravo. I can't remember the name of the show. It's the one about the boat.

 

I am looking for the right person who would want to be a romantically involved stew, basically, if you want to look at the cold, hard financial facts.

 

 

And yes.... I do plan to see where the yoga instructor and I go, but I want to still actively search.

 

Sorry, I didn't mean for you to get upset, I was just stating what happened with me. I guess I'm uneasy about the idea of being an employee of my romantic interest. Perhaps that is just some weird hangup residing within me that I need therapy for or something, lol. Changing professions is also something I wouldn't be mentally prepared for. (I'm in a different line of work)

 

But, I realize that people do all sorts of things and make all sorts of changing in this life for love. (I have in the past) So maybe you should just hold off on discussing traveling lifestyle and start with love - fall in love and then see what the future can bring.

[Popsicle]

For what it's worth, I do experience wanderlust a lot...

[Timshel]

thread can be closed. I have no idea why i ask any personal questions here....

 

Toi many attackers and haters.

 

Maybe....

 

I see you as ready for something more than what you have experienced so far.

 

Yet your lifestyle contradicts a need for intimacy and connection...thus the thread(s).

 

A thread for companionship, a thread for travel. Both are possible but you seem antsy for resolution to happen now.

 

Why not wait and find out what you really want instead of rushing things out of boredom and a sense of need?

[writergal]

I'd like that. But she's pretty flakey. I need backup plans with her.

 

As for a stranger? If she doesn't want to go, eff her. who cares? I'm only looking for cool chicks who like to travel.

 

Kinda getting pissed off here.

 

You are making insulting posts, probably out of jealousy. That's what it usually is when people say negative, derogatory things. You're probably mad you'll never see an opportunity like this.

 

FYI: I don't "work for" a yacht company. I own a yacht company and a second small business, thank you very much.

 

Now, for the normal, non troll types, I made this thread to try to figure out where i might find more cool chicks that are seeking travel and adventure in life. It'd be cool if some of you that did post about that had some tips on where to meet chicks like yourseves... especially if you live in urban, suburban or rural areas.

 

I am seeking a real person to get involved with, even if onpy temporarily, who could have the stew job if she wanted it.

 

It's pretty simple. Haters are basically jealous of the as of yet non existent girl and possibly the fact that I own 2 companies and travel while they are stuck in a rut. I have run across this a lot. Enjoy your boring lives haters. Ill be thinking of you as i breathe fresh ocean air all day, the best food Earth has to offer and a happy, well balanced, peaceful lifestyle surrounded by the beauty of nature. Enjoy those cubes.

 

Trust me I'm not jealous of your lifestyle because it's too transient, and I happen to be friends with a guy who owns his own yacht business (abroad), whom I've known since high school. He is married with a kid and his wife is his business partner, so she stews because she wants to. So, you need to meet a woman who wants the same things you do. It's common sense really. And so far, you haven't met that woman as your posts state.

 

And I am not a LoveWeary hater either. I just gave my honest opinion based on my observations. That's all.

 

I agree with Timshel that you are conflicted. That's clear. You want to maintain your transient lifestyle yet you want to find a woman to be a companion to you in a serious sense. So, you have to really do some soul searching to find a middle ground for yourself so that you can have both.

[jen1447]

I don't think I'd make a good stew, LW. Does this mean our future R is in jeopardy?