Girlfriend Going on School Trip for 2 Weeks

[Els]

She replied earlier, which i woke up to because of the time difference. She told me what she was up to and that she is going to stay in a different island for 2 days and 1 night (Friday and Saturday) so she cannot talk as there is no wifi. She also said sorry for taking ages to reply, she said she was busy all day, but she wasn't in the best of moods. I've asked her what is up, but she will be out so hopefully will tell me later. What could this be from? I don't want her upset for her holiday

 

Dude....

 

You really need to get your own life. Stop hanging on your girlfriend's every word and worrying about guys she's talking to and getting insecure about every little detail. She's traveling and should be living to the fullest where she is at, not talking to you at every opportunity. I understand wanting SOME contact every now and then just to keep in touch, but you are overdoing this to an extreme. She will tell you about her trip when she is back!

 

Do you go to school or work? What are your hobbies? Do you have any friends to talk to or spend time with during these 2 weeks?

[forest97]

Dude....

 

You really need to get your own life. Stop hanging on your girlfriend's every word and worrying about guys she's talking to and getting insecure about every little detail. She's traveling and should be living to the fullest where she is at, not talking to you at every opportunity. I understand wanting SOME contact every now and then just to keep in touch, but you are overdoing this to an extreme. She will tell you about her trip when she is back!

 

Do you go to school or work? What are your hobbies? Do you have any friends to talk to or spend time with during these 2 weeks?

 

I am doing a football/soccer scholarship, but have been injured for a while, but slowly coming back into it, i love sorts, playing xbox etc. I do have friends, but they are very busy at the moment as they have exams and things like that.

 

But you don't think i have nothing to worry about, although they are now friends on facebook, i think she added him so?

[I_Give_Up67]

She replied earlier, which i woke up to because of the time difference. She told me what she was up to and that she is going to stay in a different island for 2 days and 1 night (Friday and Saturday) so she cannot talk as there is no wifi. She also said sorry for taking ages to reply, she said she was busy all day, but she wasn't in the best of moods. I've asked her what is up, but she will be out so hopefully will tell me later. What could this be from? I don't want her upset for her holiday

 

Also she told me she loves me and misses me

 

My friend..

 

Not intending to be cruel or disrespectful towards you, she may be a bit moody because you are not letting her enjoy her holiday. Please take the advice that others here have given you and back off a bit. Let her enjoy this trip.

 

You are very young and this may be your first love, but she will not be your love much longer if you continue acting so insecure, needy and clingy. You are going to turn her off in a major way very quickly by acting like this.

 

As for the guy that's hanging out with her group, he may not even like women. My point being, you should not worry that she will cheat on you with this guy just because he is there. You can't be with her every minute of every day. She told you that she loves you and that she misses you. Give her the benefit of the doubt, and trust her until she gives you a solid reason not to trust her.

 

Continuing to behave as you have been will certainly drive her away! Do you have any hobbies or activities that you can engage to take your mind off of these negative thoughts?

Edited April 16, 2015 by I_Give_Up67

[forest97]

My friend..

 

Not intending to be cruel or disrespectful towards you, she may be a bit moody because you are not letting her enjoy her holiday. Please take the advice that others here have given you and back off a bit. Let her enjoy this trip.

 

You are very young and this may be your first love, but she will not be your love much longer if you continue acting so insecure, needy and clingy. You are going to turn her off in a major way very quickly by acting like this.

 

As for the guy that's hanging out with her group, he may not even like women. My point being, you should not worry that she will cheat on you with this guy just because he is there. You can't be with her every minute of every day. She told you that she loves you and that she misses you. Give her the benefit of the doubt, and trust her until she gives you a solid reason not to trust her.

 

Continuing to behave as you have been will certainly drive her away! Do you have any hobbies or activities that you can engage to take your mind off of these negative thoughts?

 

I haven't been annoying her, i have only replied when she replied, so i haven't kept on at her to get back to me. I really don't think its me that's making her moody to be honest, but i need to know whats up to be honest, i care about her!

 

But he seems to only be hanging around with her group of friends so i find that a bit weird, then taking pictures with them and becoming friends with them on facebook, so i shouldn't be worried about him and her?

 

What sort of hobbies would you suggest taking part in?

[I_Give_Up67]

I haven't been annoying her, i have only replied when she replied, so i haven't kept on at her to get back to me. I really don't think its me that's making her moody to be honest, but i need to know whats up to be honest, i care about her!

 

But he seems to only be hanging around with her group of friends so i find that a bit weird, then taking pictures with them and becoming friends with them on facebook, so i shouldn't be worried about him and her?

 

What sort of hobbies would you suggest taking part in?

 

 

 

Do you have a reason to believe this guy would single out your GF to hit on vs. the other young women in her group? Again, you need to trust her.

 

Even if this guy singles out your GF, and she really loves you, she will stop him cold because she has a BF (YOU). If she flirts or accepts this guy's advances, then she is not someone you need in your life "period". If she does act inappropriately, she is not going to send you an email telling you about it. You can sit there and drive yourself insane thinking about whether she will remain faithful, but it is a waste of time and emotions.

 

The fact that her group has added this guy on their FB means nothing at this point unless you start see photos of your GF and this guy kissing, holding hands, or cuddling. Until that happens it's not even worth stressing about. Have a little faith in her.

 

As for hobbies or activities, you must have something you enjoy doing? Do you workout or take in sporting events? Have you checked out the latest films at your local movie theater? How about hitting a pub with your friend for a fun night out? Anything to keep your mind preoccupied while she is away.

 

Another poster made a really good point, and that is you have to allow your GF to miss you. You are making yourself too available to her.

[forest97]

Do you have a reason to believe this guy would single out your GF to hit on vs. the other young women in her group? Again, you need to trust her.

 

Even if this guy singles out your GF, and she really loves you, she will stop him cold because she has a BF (YOU). If she flirts or accepts this guy's advances, then she is not someone you need in your life "period". If she does act inappropriately, she is not going to send you an email telling you about it. You can sit there and drive yourself insane thinking about whether she will remain faithful, but it is a waste of time and emotions.

 

The fact that her group has added this guy on their FB means nothing at this point unless you start see photos of your GF and this guy kissing, holding hands, or cuddling. Until that happens it's not even worth stressing about. Have a little faith in her.

 

As for hobbies or activities, you must have something you enjoy doing? Do you workout or take in sporting events? Have you checked out the latest films at your local movie theater? How about hitting a pub with your friend for a fun night out? Anything to keep your mind preoccupied while she is away.

 

Another poster made a really good point, and that is you have to allow your GF to miss you. You are making yourself too available to her.

 

I really hope there is no pictures of that to be honest, even if he is "hot" she says she loves me right, so she wouldn't do anything to hurt me, that's what she said? Her friend (who is a girl) put a bikini picture of my girlfriend on facebook, she looks so good to be honest, i think she looks beautiful no matter what! I might go for a kick around with my mates, and i've got trials tomorrow so that will hopefully take my mind off of it. Like she's going to stay on that island for 2 days tomorrow so she cannot talk, suppose that's a good thing.

 

How do i allow her to miss me? I know she said she misses me, but she will have fun, which she should she's on holiday! But surely she wouldn't miss me much to be honest?

 

I mentioned she said she "wasn't in the best of moods" Should i be worried? I don't think it was me, but her best friend is hanging with a different group i thin (from pictures i saw) could it be this, and what can i do to help?

[I_Give_Up67]

How do i allow her to miss me? I know she said she misses me, but she will have fun, which she should she's on holiday! But surely she wouldn't miss me much to be honest?

 

I mentioned she said she "wasn't in the best of moods" Should i be worried? I don't think it was me, but her best friend is hanging with a different group i thin (from pictures i saw) could it be this, and what can i do to help?

 

 

 

Allow her to initiate contact. Let her wonder what you are doing for a change.

 

The intention is not to be cruel or play games with her, but if she misses you enough, she will go out of her way to keep in touch with you.

 

As for the mood she's in, I wouldn't worry about it, she may have been having a bad day. Seriously, go out and enjoy yourself and have some fun! Try and relax. Just trust her for now.

[almond]

You sound quite young.

 

 

Plenty of bad things are going to happen to you in life, that's just how things work. This probably isn't going to be the last relationship you'll ever have, meaning, you will likely break up at some point or another.

 

 

You will never enjoy life if you spend the good times worrying about bad things that probably won't ever happen. There is plenty of time to worry when **** hits the fan...now is the time to enjoy yourself.

 

 

You seem to have some anxiety issues. I think it would be a good idea to speak to your school counsellor or family doctor about this. Breaking down in tears in front of her indicates that you were overwhelmed with worry and stress, that was totally out of proportion to the situation. Those negative, racing thoughts of yours and that sinking feeling doesn't need to be there. You don't need to live like this. If you don't address it, you run the risk of ruining not only this relationship, but many others as well.

 

 

Good luck, and breathe. Everything will be okay!

Edited April 16, 2015 by almond

[forest97]

Allow her to initiate contact. Let her wonder what you are doing for a change.

 

The intention is not to be cruel or play games with her, but if she misses you enough, she will go out of her way to keep in touch with you.

 

As for the mood she's in, I wouldn't worry about it, she may have been having a bad day. Seriously, go out and enjoy yourself and have some fun! Try and relax. Just trust her for now.

 

Well we won't be in contact for 2 days whilst she is on that island so. Although i have those trials tomorrow and before she went away, she told me to email her to let her know how got on, should i still do this? Even though she won't be there?

[I_Give_Up67]

Well we won't be in contact for 2 days whilst she is on that island so. Although i have those trials tomorrow and before she went away, she told me to email her to let her know how got on, should i still do this? Even though she won't be there?

 

My suggestion is, no do not email her. If she really wants to know, and she is thinking about you, let her email you and ask how you did.

 

She probably told you this because she knew you would email her anyway. Let her initiate the next contact. The goal is to let her think about you enough to reach out some of the time.

[forest97]

My suggestion is, no do not email her. If she really wants to know, and she is thinking about you, let her email you and ask how you did.

 

She probably told you this because she knew you would email her anyway. Let her initiate the next contact. The goal is to let her think about you enough to reach out some of the time.

 

So don't email until she next replies? Even though she wouldn't be able to ask as she has no wifi for the next two days

[I_Give_Up67]

So don't email until she next replies? Even though she wouldn't be able to ask as she has no wifi for the next two days

 

 

 

It will be a long two days for you no doubt, but I would not send that email. Let her contact you once she gets back from that island.

 

You are not doing this to be a jerk to her, but just allow her to chase you too for a change.

[forest97]

It will be a long two days for you no doubt, but I would not send that email. Let her contact you once she gets back from that island.

 

You are not doing this to be a jerk to her, but just allow her to chase you too for a change.

 

It will be to be honest, and a hard few days as i will be under pressure for the trials, i hope i do well! Do you think she may think i'm sort of ignoring her (even though she hasn't replied) because she asked me to tell her?

 

I really do love her and care about her, but to be honest, i'm not missing her as much as i was is this bad? Although i do miss her a bit of course and not talking will be a bit hard, but i feel better so

[Diezel]

I really do love her and care about her, but to be honest, i'm not missing her as much as i was is this bad?

 

This thread says otherwise, buddy.

[forest97]

This thread says otherwise, buddy.

 

I was that bad to be honest, but i've realised that she should be enjoying herself and not talking to me constantly whilst she is there (once in a lifetime chance) obviously i want to hear from her to find out how it's all going an i'm sure i will after she's back from that island! Sounds bad, but i've got other things to be doing that are more important than waiting for a reply, i mean i love getting her replies, but it's out of my control when/if she does, same as the stuff she does out there you know?

 

So is this bad? But i am starting to feel better about this, although i do miss her yes, but i know she's having fun and i will get to see her after she's back from the trip on the Wednesday for her birthday meal like she said, well like she promised and i can only trust what she says, so if she says everything will be the same, let's hope it is

[forest97]

And she answered my email, saying she feels left out, and she's missing home. She also says she needs cuddles. How can i comfort her? i asked her how she felt left out, but for the missing home, i told her to enjoy her time there and she will be back before she knows it.

[forest97]

She also said that the guy hwho has all the girls on his instagram is hanging around with one of her friends, which i suppose is good, although she brought him up, i've never heard of him, was she just telling me he's hanging with her friend or?

[I_Give_Up67]

She also said that the guy hwho has all the girls on his instagram is hanging around with one of her friends, which i suppose is good, although she brought him up, i've never heard of him, was she just telling me he's hanging with her friend or?

 

 

She is probably trying to put your mind at ease figuring that you have been worried about him. Again, trust her word for now. She knows you and doesn't want you wondering about her dedication to you. There are no guarantees in life, so unless you have overwhelming proof of the opposite, you have to trust her.

[forest97]

She is probably trying to put your mind at ease figuring that you have been worried about him. Again, trust her word for now. She knows you and doesn't want you wondering about her dedication to you. There are no guarantees in life, so unless you have overwhelming proof of the opposite, you have to trust her.

 

There is no way she would know i would know about him to be honest, i haven't even mentioned anything about it to be honest. Basically all her friends are hanging out either in two's or threes (including this guy with one of her friends) and she feels left out what can i say to make her feel better?

[I_Give_Up67]

There is no way she would know i would know about him to be honest, i haven't even mentioned anything about it to be honest. Basically all her friends are hanging out either in two's or threes (including this guy with one of her friends) and she feels left out what can i say to make her feel better?

 

 

I don't think there is much you can do not being there. You've already told her to have fun and before she knows it she will be back home. She will find groove to fit in while she is there to enjoy herself. Don't worry about her too much.

[forest97]

I don't think there is much you can do not being there. You've already told her to have fun and before she knows it she will be back home. She will find groove to fit in while she is there to enjoy herself. Don't worry about her too much.

 

I will try not to, i just want her to enjoy herself as it's a great experience and she is lucky to be able to go there. She said she can't wait to see me and give me cuddles, so i let her know she will be seeing me after and she can show me all the pictures and stories etc. she says don't worry we shall. She's gone to sleep now, so will probably not hear from her until Sunday. Just got to focus on my trials now and take my mind off her Hate seeing her upset though

[pteromom]

I really don't think its me that's making her moody to be honest, but i need to know whats up to be honest, i care about her!

 

But he seems to only be hanging around with her group of friends so i find that a bit weird, then taking pictures with them and becoming friends with them on facebook, so i shouldn't be worried about him and her?

 

You don't NEED to know what's up. You can trust that your gf - an adult - can handle her own stuff.

 

No, you shouldn't be worrying just because he's a good looking guy. Do you not trust her at all? If not, you have bigger problems than this guy.

[pteromom]

I was that bad to be honest, but i've realised that she should be enjoying herself and not talking to me constantly whilst she is there (once in a lifetime chance) obviously i want to hear from her to find out how it's all going an i'm sure i will after she's back from that island! Sounds bad, but i've got other things to be doing that are more important than waiting for a reply, i mean i love getting her replies, but it's out of my control when/if she does, same as the stuff she does out there you know?

 

So is this bad? But i am starting to feel better about this, although i do miss her yes, but i know she's having fun and i will get to see her after she's back from the trip on the Wednesday for her birthday meal like she said, well like she promised and i can only trust what she says, so if she says everything will be the same, let's hope it is

 

No - it is not bad. It's HEALTHY.

 

You can't control what she does - ever. Not on this trip, and not outside of it.

 

All you can do is trust her unless she gives you a reason not to, and mostly - trust yourself, that no matter what happens, you will respond in the way that is healthiest for you.

[forest97]

Well as i thought i was fine about this all, she uploads an album on Facebook, which includes several pictures of her friends and this one guy, and the same on his Facebook of my girlfriend, in which she has liked them. There is also another picture of her close to this guy which makes me so jealous, what can i do? It makes me miss her and think somethings up, someone help.

[Poutrew]

I've been reading your post with some interest, forest97. You might want to read my reply to your other post (the flirty one) about doing some cell phone snooping. You can at least see what pictures she takes with her cell that she may not want you to see. Depending on her phone, I think most will have a SD micro slot buried in them somewhere. If that doesn't do the trick, you might want to consider laying a keylogging software into her computer. It will reveal everything she types into the PC, including passwords to hidden FB / other social media accounts she may have. Just first practice using the key logger on your own machine first so you can learn how it works, and make sure it is totally undetectable - you'll pay around a hundred for a good one. Don't use any freebies out there as they can be detected easily and if she learns what you did its game over.

 

 

Her behaviors may be totally innocent, but when she told you she wasn't feeling good, and how she needed cuddles from you, it could also be her trying to compensate for a guilty conscience, because something happened. You unfortunately will never know unless she acts guilty when she gets back, (or the bruises teeth marks leave on her body 'down there' haven't healed totally - it takes at least a couple weeks for stuff like that to go away) or her body language isn't quite right...and you (gently) get her to tell you what is wrong. I wasn't really worried for you until you mentioned that particular post. As far as facebook goes, just the one pic doesn't tell you anything. It would be different if either one starts posting a gazillion pics of the other on their site. As far as snooping, if there is anything going on, then they will still stay in contact with each other after they return and you will be able to get a record of the continuing affair and what type it is - emotional, physical, whatever. As I said in my other post, I learned my college gf was a closet bisexual who was still active with a girl she knew from 5th grade. (And they *never* invited me, sheesh).

 

 

At any rate, you need some peace, my friend. NO man should ever get as twisted up over a woman as you seem to be. Do what you need to do to attain peace...