Can anyone decipher this Tumblr post from my ex?

[tikay00]

Honestly, indirects and mind games on social media only confirm how childish she is, and that alone should put you off getting back together with her, if you're entertaining the thought, because until she grows up, there will be no chance of you two having a healthy relationship - immaturity kills relationships.

 

My ex-boyfriend used to do this. Apparently, expressing his feelings on Twitter for the whole world to see was a lot easier than expressing his feelings directly to me

 

I swear social media has made break ups/moving on a million times harder.

 

Omg, tell me about it. Not texting or calling isn't the hard part. It's sneaking peaks at their social media stuff. No more!

[Natsu21]

Absolutely people slip up and it happens. But, they usually come back on here and say, "Damn, I'm an idiot. I messed up...broke NC." And no one is going to bash on them because, in there post, they realize that they screwed up! You're trying to make deals with yourself. Thinking that you could work on being friends. Well, you can't be in NC if you're working on a friendship.

 

 

When we say NC. We don't mean that you can never, ever see or talk to your Ex ever again. You just can't have anything to do with them while you still have those romantic feelings for them. Once you get to a point of TRUE indifference, THEN you can think about forming a friendship, but not a moment before.

 

I got to that point, and in all reality, once I did, I realized it wasn't worth it to be friends.

 

In fact, you'll find after you're indifferent, you have no other reason to contact them, so they just fade out of your life.

[tikay00]

I got to that point, and in all reality, once I did, I realized it wasn't worth it to be friends.

 

In fact, you'll find after you're indifferent, you have no other reason to contact them, so they just fade out of your life.

 

I'm already starting to feel that now. I know I said she's a good person, and it would be cool to have her in my corner, but honestly, it'll just be a few "how's life been?" texts here and there, and just some BS small talk on the phone.

 

I could do that with someone I talk to once a year. That's not exactly a friend.

[BC1980]

I'm already starting to feel that now. I know I said she's a good person, and it would be cool to have her in my corner, but honestly, it'll just be a few "how's life been?" texts here and there, and just some BS small talk on the phone.

 

I could do that with someone I talk to once a year. That's not exactly a friend.

 

It usually ends up being pointless to keep in contact because, like you said, what is the point of sending a "what's up" text once a year? It's forced and awkward. Like an obligation. I think it would be so difficult to be friends afterwards because it doesn't grow organically like a normal friendship or relationship. You have to reestablish the boundaries, and it gets awkward. You can't ever really forget what you used to be, and I don't think that most people get to complete indifference. Sure, some do, but I don't think I could be completely indifferent about any ex.

 

I have 4 exes, and I think it would be differing levels of awkward if I ran into any of them. I have no animosity towards 2 of the exes, but I don't think I can say I'm indifferent. I'm not affected by them, but that's also the reason I wouldn't carry on a friendship with them. I simply don't care. The other 2 ended on very bad terms, and I feel betrayed by both. So no, I don't think I will ever be friends with them.

[BC1980]

I'll also say that it is hard to go NC because, in your heart, you know that you probably won't talk to her again. If you are serious and diligent about NC, there is a slim chance you will cross paths with her again in this life. That was why it was so difficult for me to go NC. I knew that once I committed to it, that was it. Over. Done. Finished. I would never speak with him again. It was so very painful for the first several months, just simply coming to terms with that concept. Because it seems like a radical concept even when you know it's best.

 

Over time, I came to accept it. It's still very sad to me, but it became more palatable I guess you would say. I was able to accept it without breaking down each time. Now, I just know he will never be a part of my life again, and that is my reality. I'm ready for the next chapter. You can get to that point as well, but you have to truly be willing to go through the more difficult part up front.

[tikay00]

I'll also say that it is hard to go NC because, in your heart, you know that you probably won't talk to her again. If you are serious and diligent about NC, there is a slim chance you will cross paths with her again in this life. That was why it was so difficult for me to go NC. I knew that once I committed to it, that was it. Over. Done. Finished. I would never speak with him again. It was so very painful for the first several months, just simply coming to terms with that concept. Because it seems like a radical concept even when you know it's best.

 

Over time, I came to accept it. It's still very sad to me, but it became more palatable I guess you would say. I was able to accept it without breaking down each time. Now, I just know he will never be a part of my life again, and that is my reality. I'm ready for the next chapter. You can get to that point as well, but you have to truly be willing to go through the more difficult part up front.

 

She'll contact me out of the blue. I don't 100% know that, but I know that. I'll have to get over her before she does. And by that time, hopefully I can give her the, "I've been well, gotta go though, have a date tonight." Sounds bad, but whatever.

 

She's already kind of off my relationship pedestal. Been talking to someone else I'm more compatible with. New goal, just move on for real, and not want to be friends or anything. Just move on with my life, and don't look back.

 

Can't stay friends with an ex is what I'm sticking to, and it really helps, compared to, "hopefully after I'm done with this NC thing, I can call her up, and be normal around her."

Edited October 24, 2014 by tikay00