Author Mapper71 Posted August 12, 2014 Author Share Posted August 12, 2014 People grieve in their own way. I cannot justify this ladies (co workers) way as it interecedes in the business aspect. You are well within reason to expect people to pull their own weight. Some people hide behind the grief as an excuse. Sounds like she is doing that to push the envelope. two months since her mothers passing , and this behavior is still interferring with real work duties? Write your boss a memo as to your legitimate concerns and let it go. Its up to your boss to set an example of how the team members are to have their duties achieved. She is not your problem , she though is a problem if you are doing all her work. It's actually "only" been a month since her mom died, but they have been planning a memorial service for her which is taking up all her time at work along with the realtor, will, etc. She will be out tomorrow through Friday for the memorial service and apparently it entails for her to need 3 days off. However, she has pretty much just had one thing she's needed to focus on for the past two weeks and it is due tomorrow. If I had been doing it, it would have taken me maybe 3 days. She is only about 1/2 way through it and yesterday at our round table meeting she said "Well I know this is due Wednesday so I was hoping Mapper could help me with it". I KNEW that was coming! You spend all day dealing with your mom's stuff and maybe devoting an hour total to work and then Mapper gets to finish up your work and get hers done. Of course our manager doesn't say anything because she knows the stress she's been going through and tells her to take as much time off as she needs. Yes that is the key! Take as much time OFF as you need! If you had done that we could have finished your stuff before now rather than having to rush to get it done at the last minute! Link to post Share on other sites
newmoon Posted August 13, 2014 Share Posted August 13, 2014 geesh, get a life already. if you're spending so much time worrying over your co-worker how much are you actually getting done during the day? i don't care who is on the internet all day, who is texting all day, or who takes 3 hours breaks. you don't need to stress about other people. mind your own place in the workplace and don't concern yourself with others. it's co-workers like you that make workplaces difficult. we all have issues at one time or another and you might need some support and leniency along the way as well, so ease up on what she is doing and do your own work without minding her business. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted August 13, 2014 Share Posted August 13, 2014 That's cold. Leave without pay? Yep, welcome to the world of the blue collar male. It appears you wouldn't last long in my industry. There's a reason for that. We simply don't tolerate inattention to work. If you're not working, you're not getting paid and get out of here. That's it. Gladhanding and hugs start at 5pm. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mapper71 Posted August 13, 2014 Author Share Posted August 13, 2014 geesh, get a life already. if you're spending so much time worrying over your co-worker how much are you actually getting done during the day? Um...well see that's just it! I am waiting on her to get me her part of the work so I can continue it! My work is done and has been done for days so I sit and twiddle my thumbs waiting on her. So I look at her computer and see she's ordering something off of Amazon so that just leaves me to surf the internet myself waiting on her! Link to post Share on other sites
newmoon Posted August 13, 2014 Share Posted August 13, 2014 Um...well see that's just it! I am waiting on her to get me her part of the work so I can continue it! My work is done and has been done for days so I sit and twiddle my thumbs waiting on her. So I look at her computer and see she's ordering something off of Amazon so that just leaves me to surf the internet myself waiting on her! you tell your boss/supervisor. and that's it. if it doesn't get done, you just say to boss "i told you about it and X never gave it to me so the project didn't get done." your part is over, you are covered, and now you can shop on amazon too. Link to post Share on other sites
nittygritty Posted August 13, 2014 Share Posted August 13, 2014 One example of how expectations of men and women are different. A man would be fired for such inattention to work. In my industry, he'd probably end up maimed or disfigured, simply because such inattention cannot be tolerated and the machinery will eat you. In my case, when my dad died, I took off a half day to bury him, then had lunch and went back to work. That's what men do. If I were the lady's boss, she'd get mandatory family leave, without pay, if she couldn't perform her job tasks. Business is business. We all deal with sickness and death. I guess conducting "business" out on the golf course doesn't count. Link to post Share on other sites
nittygritty Posted August 13, 2014 Share Posted August 13, 2014 Oh I pretty much disliked her from day 1! I gave her a few weeks to see if she really was that way and she was/is! No way am I leaving this job! It is the BEST JOB EVER! Everyone (but her) is great, casual atmosphere, great friendships. I mean how many people give their departmental co-workers a hug when they return from a long vacation? If she was gone, it would be perfect! Have you gone to your superiors and told them that your co-worker is wasting company time planning her mother's funeral? Or are you worried that it would make you appear to be cold-hearted, petty and cruel? Link to post Share on other sites
dogeared Posted August 13, 2014 Share Posted August 13, 2014 Sure she is "on the clock" but she'd be getting paid whether she is coming to work or taking bereavement leave. Her mother just died, of course people are sympathetic to her. This sounds like a "bitch eating crackers" scenario - you hate her, so everything she does pisses you off. It sounds like what is really distracting you from your work is not her chatting, but the fact that you are carefully watching her and timing her every move instead of doing your work. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
MidwestUSA Posted August 13, 2014 Share Posted August 13, 2014 It sounds like what is really distracting you from your work is not her chatting, but the fact that you are carefully watching her and timing her every move instead of doing your work. Bingo, dogeared! This has nothing to do with a death in the family. It's nothing new. https://www.loveshack.org/forums/platonic/business-professional-relationships/479922-co-worker-never-shuts-her-mouth-now-reading-out-loud-everyone-s-addresses I'd like to know who this employer is that tolerates everyone surfing the net all day, so I can make sure I don't patronize them. Link to post Share on other sites
dogeared Posted August 13, 2014 Share Posted August 13, 2014 It's actually "only" been a month since her mom died, but they have been planning a memorial service for her which is taking up all her time at work along with the realtor, will, etc. She will be out tomorrow through Friday for the memorial service and apparently it entails for her to need 3 days off. However, she has pretty much just had one thing she's needed to focus on for the past two weeks and it is due tomorrow. If I had been doing it, it would have taken me maybe 3 days. She is only about 1/2 way through it and yesterday at our round table meeting she said "Well I know this is due Wednesday so I was hoping Mapper could help me with it". I KNEW that was coming! You spend all day dealing with your mom's stuff and maybe devoting an hour total to work and then Mapper gets to finish up your work and get hers done. Of course our manager doesn't say anything because she knows the stress she's been going through and tells her to take as much time off as she needs. Yes that is the key! Take as much time OFF as you need! If you had done that we could have finished your stuff before now rather than having to rush to get it done at the last minute! I can understand being annoyed at having to take on her responsibility in this case - but instead of spending all your energy checking up on her you need to say something to your boss and that's it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dogeared Posted August 13, 2014 Share Posted August 13, 2014 Bingo, dogeared! This has nothing to do with a death in the family. It's nothing new. https://www.loveshack.org/forums/platonic/business-professional-relationships/479922-co-worker-never-shuts-her-mouth-now-reading-out-loud-everyone-s-addresses I'd like to know who this employer is that tolerates everyone surfing the net all day, so I can make sure I don't patronize them. There clearly isn't enough work to justify the number of employees. Or at least not these two. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MidwestUSA Posted August 13, 2014 Share Posted August 13, 2014 There clearly isn't enough work to justify the number of employees. Or at least not these two. If you don't get a chicken dinner, I'll share mine with you! Fries or baked potato? Link to post Share on other sites
dogeared Posted August 13, 2014 Share Posted August 13, 2014 If you don't get a chicken dinner, I'll share mine with you! Fries or baked potato? baked potato, with everything! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mapper71 Posted August 13, 2014 Author Share Posted August 13, 2014 baked potato, with everything! Aw shucks! You are guys are TOO funny!!! Love it! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mapper71 Posted August 13, 2014 Author Share Posted August 13, 2014 Bingo, dogeared! This has nothing to do with a death in the family. It's nothing new. https://www.loveshack.org/forums/platonic/business-professional-relationships/479922-co-worker-never-shuts-her-mouth-now-reading-out-loud-everyone-s-addresses I'd like to know who this employer is that tolerates everyone surfing the net all day, so I can make sure I don't patronize them. Aw...you're just jealous because I'm such a quick and efficient worker that I get my work done waaay ahead of schedule! Always have at every job I've been in. Not my fault she's a lazy worker! Link to post Share on other sites
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