Author astr591 Posted May 21, 2014 Author Share Posted May 21, 2014 Well OP - then it appears you have somehow disconnected yourself somehow, from the standard culture that surrounds you. I looked through every single response - and no-one agrees with your point of view. Personally - my gut feeling is that you are over-reacting to a 'danger' that isn't actually there. Many good points have been made - about how children can benefit positively from mixed classes. And they actually do. You may not 'like' that they do, but perhaps you need to re-examine your own worries and fears, and not dump them on your daughter. Rather than rushing off to the school to complain - you might try engaging in conversation with other parents, and get their overview. Perhaps you could even try dropping by and having a chat with the swim teachers. This could prove enlightening. Co-education need not be immoral. In fact, it is where many children learn valuable and positive lessons in life - that actually lead to stronger-developed moral codes. Consider: Every 4 years the Olympics host the best swimmers in the world - men and women both. Were they all cloistered away from each other until they were of 'legal' age? I'm guessing almost none of them were. And look where they wind up......................................... but I don't see any advantage. Keeping the boys and girls separate in this class would probably allow less opportunity for embarrassment and force boys at least to behave better in their class and allow everyone to focus more. Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 but I don't see any advantage. Keeping the boys and girls separate in this class would probably allow less opportunity for embarrassment and force boys at least to behave better in their class and allow everyone to focus more. Well, you've expressed your views to us, and done a fair bit of arguing with posters, but what are you going to do? What's your plan? Link to post Share on other sites
Koopa Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 but I don't see any advantage. Keeping the boys and girls separate in this class would probably allow less opportunity for embarrassment and force boys at least to behave better in their class and allow everyone to focus more. I give up, not sure why you started this thread. You have obviously already made up your mind on how you feel about this situation even though not a single person has shared your views. What makes you think your daughter will be embarrassed, and what makes you think she will not be able to handle a situation? Boys are usually nice to girls, its the other girls you should be worried about. Teenage girls can be vicious. Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 There is always going to be ridiculous parents with outrageous concerns. Some where in America this week at an elementary school, there was going to be a performance of YMCA and they would be dressed as the village people. ONE mom complained that one of the kids would have to dress as a native american and she was offended. Schools response? Cancel the entire performance. Is that what you'd like OP? Cancel swim for everyone ? Link to post Share on other sites
Shepp Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 but I don't see any advantage. Keeping the boys and girls separate in this class would probably allow less opportunity for embarrassment and force boys at least to behave better in their class and allow everyone to focus more. Hahaha yeah everyone focused just fine in my class cheers! Maybe they should have separate school buses too, and separate beaches 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Chocolat Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 Hahaha yeah everyone focused just fine in my class cheers! Maybe they should have separate school buses too, and separate beaches Maybe separate continents! You'd need a Visa to visit, at which time you could be briefed on proper behavior, etc. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
rester Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 but I don't see any advantage. Keeping the boys and girls separate in this class would probably allow less opportunity for embarrassment and force boys at least to behave better in their class and allow everyone to focus more. The advantage is to help the students get over their embarrassment and learn how to deal with teasing in a controlled, supervised situation. It's also highly likely that both the boys and girls would be better behaved in a co-ed class, rather than separated. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Smilecharmer Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 Why should girls be embarrassed by wearing bathing suits? Is female sexuality somehow embarrassing to you? Are you afraid the boys will hurt her in class? Have impure thoughts because they saw a girl in a bathing suit? Are you religious? Is this about you in your past? Why do you insist in not answering us about why you believe this? If you gave a reason other than embarrassment which most of us never felt, then maybe we could help more. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author astr591 Posted May 21, 2014 Author Share Posted May 21, 2014 The advantage is to help the students get over their embarrassment and learn how to deal with teasing in a controlled, supervised situation. It's also highly likely that both the boys and girls would be better behaved in a co-ed class, rather than separated. this is the part I just find impossible to believe. Link to post Share on other sites
Author astr591 Posted May 21, 2014 Author Share Posted May 21, 2014 There is always going to be ridiculous parents with outrageous concerns. Some where in America this week at an elementary school, there was going to be a performance of YMCA and they would be dressed as the village people. ONE mom complained that one of the kids would have to dress as a native american and she was offended. Schools response? Cancel the entire performance. Is that what you'd like OP? Cancel swim for everyone ? swimming class for just about 45 minutes doesn't seem like it would really allow students to learn that much anyway, so it wouldn't really be a bad thing to not have it. Main thing I believe though is that boys and girls have separate classes. I wouldn't be surprised if lots of parents feel the same but they don't want to speak out for whatever reason Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 swimming class for just about 45 minutes doesn't seem like it would really allow students to learn that much anyway, so it wouldn't really be a bad thing to not have it. Main thing I believe though is that boys and girls have separate classes. I wouldn't be surprised if lots of parents feel the same but they don't want to speak out for whatever reason If that was the case, don't you think by now that somebody who supported your extremely unusual viewpoint would have posted by now? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Haydn Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 Went to a swimming Gala with my daughter recently. The mums were busily snapping pics of the attractive swimming coach. Very tight Speedo`s. Link to post Share on other sites
janedoe67 Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 I think I went to church with you growing up.....or maybe the Duggars did? If you have taught your daughter what modesty means, then there is zero reason that she should not be able to take a public school swimming class. If this is that big of a deal, that is what church schools and homeschooling is for. Link to post Share on other sites
janedoe67 Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 There is always going to be ridiculous parents with outrageous concerns. Some where in America this week at an elementary school, there was going to be a performance of YMCA and they would be dressed as the village people. ONE mom complained that one of the kids would have to dress as a native american and she was offended. Schools response? Cancel the entire performance. Is that what you'd like OP? Cancel swim for everyone ? I went to church with hundreds of these kinds of parents, and the answer is yes. They want The Village People banned, every Harry Potter book burned, and only Christian prayer in schools. They also do not want there to be a prom, they don't want "that gay man" teaching history because it might be catching, and if the high school whispers the word "condom," they will hyperventilate. Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 Keeping the boys and girls separate in this class would probably allow less opportunity for embarrassment and force boys at least to behave better in their class and allow everyone to focus more. No way - if you have all the girls together, they will all make comments about each other, and laugh at each other for their flaws. With the boys in there, they are more worried about how they look for the boys and aren't paying as much attention to each other. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author astr591 Posted May 21, 2014 Author Share Posted May 21, 2014 No way - if you have all the girls together, they will all make comments about each other, and laugh at each other for their flaws. With the boys in there, they are more worried about how they look for the boys and aren't paying as much attention to each other. worrying how they look for the boys seems just as bad. Also, I would think that if a girl is nervous being around another girl in a swimsuit, their anxiety would be doubled if boys were there Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 worrying how they look for the boys seems just as bad. Also, I would think that if a girl is nervous being around another girl in a swimsuit, their anxiety would be doubled if boys were there Have you always had such outlandish body images for females? Heck, I love my female self and I don't care who looks. IF they act inappropriate - I handle it by speaking up! Why are you so determined to make your daughter the victim. She's bound to be the victim of YOUR outlook! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 All I can think about thru this montage of comments is the Seinfield episode with George C in the pool.... soo funny!! As to this parents concern, the parent is overgeneralizing the perception that "ALL boys" are going to overstep a social boundary. As a parent to sons, I take it as an insult. You assume that parents of boys allow them to demoralize the female gender, how far from the truth this really is. I , along with others here, made it clear that during those years, we were more focused on getting a PASS grade then worrying about others. I cared more about learning to swim safely and do the dives correctly then whether someone was "leering". The school instructor set the rules early and stood by them. We took the course seriously. In HS, most of the swim team had regard and admiration as team mates. they knew they represented the school and its policy. Link to post Share on other sites
rester Posted May 21, 2014 Share Posted May 21, 2014 worrying how they look for the boys seems just as bad. Also, I would think that if a girl is nervous being around another girl in a swimsuit, their anxiety would be doubled if boys were there This is the strangest thread. OP, there are people here trying to help you but it would be easier to understand your problem if you answered questions rather than simply stating your opinion again and again. People aren't sharing your opinion but they are trying to understand where it comes from and how to help you. Are you the mother or the father? Are you afraid of your daughter being teased or your daughter feeling anxious, or both? Have you talked to your daughter about it? What have you experienced that leads you to think she will be harassed or anxious? Have you contacted the school to see if there were other parents with your same concerns, and to ask what alternatives to the swim class your daughter has? 5 Link to post Share on other sites
jonsnuh Posted May 22, 2014 Share Posted May 22, 2014 As a past lifeguard and swim instructor, this has never been a problem with my classes. Kids are more excited about being in the water, freaking out and learning new things than the idea of a girl's prepubescent body-- or even one that's going through changes. Link to post Share on other sites
turnera Posted May 22, 2014 Share Posted May 22, 2014 that's why I am surprised more parents do not seem to have any problem with this. I don't understand it. astr, has it occurred to you, since no one in the 'real world' and no one here has a problem with it that YOU are the only person who has a problem with it? And what does that tell you? It SHOULD tell you that there IS no problem, that you are trying to imprint YOUR personal view on something completely harmless and natural. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 22, 2014 Share Posted May 22, 2014 astr591 -- I was always in coed swim classes. True sports swim suits for women are incredibly modest. No ogling needed. Sports swim suits for men are almost indecent (& except for professional swimmers very few guys look good in those little speedos) Being around all sorts different body shapes should give kids of both genders more body confidence. However, if you are this concerned, perhaps you should consider enrolling your daughter in a single sex school. It probably won't change how she feels about her body but studies have shown it may increase her math & science skills. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
juicygirl Posted June 4, 2014 Share Posted June 4, 2014 I'm surprised this is an issue. A lot of children do so little exercise these days swimming lesson should be encouraged. I did mixed swimming at school and the kids were more into competing with each other about you can swim the furthest not each other's bodies. We had full swimsuits on and those ugly swim cap. Back when I was young we did PE/Sports in our vest and knickers,lord could you imagine that happening today. I'd relax it's not like they're doing swimming lesson at the beach in a bikini. If you pull her out of the class she may miss out on something she really enjoys. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
tomkat Posted June 4, 2014 Share Posted June 4, 2014 You gotta stop overthinking this...it's a swim class-they're not spinning a coke bottle and heading to the supply closet. If you're biggest issues are immature boys, self conscious girls, and leering; here's what you need to know. Boy that age are immature. Girls that age are self conscious. And speaking from personal experience of being a boy that age once--boys are gonna leer regardless of what a girl is wearing. She could be in 18 coats and 12 pairs of sweats---they're gonna leer 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jbelle6 Posted June 8, 2014 Share Posted June 8, 2014 OP: "I can see your dirty pillows. Everyone will!!!" This thread is absolutely bizarre. I went to Catholic all girls school and even there we had to share the pool with the affiliated all boys school. Is your daughter allowed gymnastics, figure skating, cheerleading, ballet, beaches, oceans, lakes, public pools, water parks etc etc? Link to post Share on other sites
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