Untouchable_Fire Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 I think it's risky to be a SAHW/H/M/D if you get divorced; I find the other person (the working person) carries less risk. But that's my perspective. Either way, you can't leave someone with nothing, so I don't see laws changing, though I do hope (and have seen the courts include) SAHH/D get the same rights in divorce proceedings as their female counterparts. It depends on your perspective. Sure if you are a SAHM you go from living off $100,000yr to living off $40,000yr after a divorce. So, yes your standard of living drops by 60%. The good news is that you must put in 0% effort to achieve that income level. Basically you get money for free. Additionally if you remarry you can continue to collect child support. Perhaps the amount may be reduced to $30,000yr, but say you remarry a guy making $100,000yr... now you have a combined $130,000yr... still zero effort to achieve that income. If you are the one working you lose 40% or more of your income, your house, your car, your dog... ect. You have to make huge purchases to regain those things and the reduction of your income is permanent. Bottom line is this. OP just like most men today require a woman that can support herself. Otherwise he will be facing the same situation as OJ Simpson... and while we can't say OJ came up with the right solution.... we can definitely understand the factors that drove him to it.
Els Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 Well, the OP hasn't returned to clarify some very pressing questions, so meh. 3
zengirl Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 It depends on your perspective. Sure if you are a SAHM you go from living off $100,000yr to living off $40,000yr after a divorce. So, yes your standard of living drops by 60%. The good news is that you must put in 0% effort to achieve that income level. Basically you get money for free. Additionally if you remarry you can continue to collect child support. Perhaps the amount may be reduced to $30,000yr, but say you remarry a guy making $100,000yr... now you have a combined $130,000yr... still zero effort to achieve that income. Not necessarily. Child support is almost for-sure, yes, though usually it goes towards the cost of the children, but the rest is all up for grabs. And there's plenty of effort put into raising a family, IMO. I know *I'd* be terrified to be a SAHW because of the years lost in my field, and I'd be much, much less afraid to have a SAHH if I could ever afford one (unlikely in my field). That's my perspective. I find the side without a profession WAY scarier, but you're free to be afraid of whatever you like.
musemaj11 Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 That is still a lot of unnecessary stress. It's better if the husband can provide. In other words you just want to dump on your husband all the stress for him to take care of by himself? Very considerate.
Ariadne Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 In other words you just want to dump on your husband all the stress for him to take care of by himself? Very considerate. Yes, when small children are in school it's time for mom to prepare dinner, shop for food, etc. There are tons of things to do. Let the man do the working. Of course, nowadays men can't seem to be able to do that and need the women to give them money for the rent, etc.
musemaj11 Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 Yes, when small children are in school it's time for mom to prepare dinner, shop for food, etc. There are tons of things to do. Let the man do the working. Of course, nowadays men can't seem to be able to do that and need the women to give them money for the rent, etc. Nowadays men help women with domestic tasks while women help men financially. You sound excessively traditional. Your parents must have done a great job instilling the old country's culture in you.
Ariadne Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 You sound excessively traditional. Your parents must have done a great job instilling the old country's culture in you. As a matter of fact, my mother never worked and my father was very successful. The reason for this was because he only had to worry about his work. 1
musemaj11 Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 As a matter of fact, my mother never worked and my father was very successful. The reason for this was because he only had to worry about his work. I dont find women with traditional views attractive at all. I cant imagine having a partner who knows nothing about the world outside the house. Sounds too 9th century to me. But still I respect you because at least you are a true traditional woman who believes in holding up your own end of the bargain. There are plenty of women especially in America who only want the men to be traditional yet refuse to hold up their own traditional responsibilities.
Ariadne Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 I dont find women with traditional views attractive at all. I cant imagine having a partner who knows nothing about the world outside the house. Sounds too 9th century to me. But still I respect you because at least you are a true traditional woman who believes in holding up your own end of the bargain. There are plenty of women especially in America who only want the men to be traditional yet refuse to hold up their own traditional responsibilities. I'm an engineer actually, but I tried that and it sucked. If I have to I'll go back to work, by choice I'll never put a foot in the office again. Long gone are my dreams of being project manager and what not.
Ariadne Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 I respect you because at least you are a true traditional woman who believes in holding up your own end of the bargain. Thanks musemaj.
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