USMCHokie Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 Well, look at who's viva-ing outside of Vegas. Eh, I've always only had one hangup...so some days I'm alright, some days I'm not...it's hit or miss... Link to post Share on other sites
cerridwen Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 Eh, I've always only had one hangup...so some days I'm alright, some days I'm not...it's hit or miss... Practice makes perfect, pickle. Keep swinging. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ptp Posted March 3, 2012 Author Share Posted March 3, 2012 So went out with a group of friends tonight. One cute girl, just my type. I was a little weary cause she is known to be very conservative. She complimented me on my dancing so I am pretty sure she likes me. If I was good at dancing or even mediocre then the compliment would make sense. I was my usual charming self --> She gave me her number. I am going to call her should I wait 3 days or 5? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 Listen. I'm not saying SHOOT for creepy, I'm saying question what you think "creepy" is. Stop playing it so safe. Stop being so afraid of offending women by showing interest. Stop it all now, put on your big boy pants (all of you), and make a move. You know what I mean by bold, SD. There are examples of bold flirting all over this board. Do that in real life. Need examples? Go look in the Man Cave. That woman with the beard is the creepiest. For me, creepy is anything relating to sex or certain body parts. I can't imagine expressing the slightest hint of sexual interest in a girl that won't result in her anger or disgust. BTW I'm talking about real life, not the forum stuff where everything is already accepted as fun and games. Link to post Share on other sites
cerridwen Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 So went out with a group of friends tonight. One cute girl, just my type. I was a little weary cause she is known to be very conservative. She complimented me on my dancing so I am pretty sure she likes me. If I was good at dancing or even mediocre then the compliment would make sense. I was my usual charming self --> She gave me her number. I am going to call her should I wait 3 days or 5? She never stood a chance at resistance. Good for you, Ptp. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ptp Posted March 3, 2012 Author Share Posted March 3, 2012 Yes. And risk being "creepy" for God's sake. Coming across as creepy seems to be the More Ineffective Male's number one fear. (No offense anyone.) I am guessing that is directed am me...ouch. Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 I can do creepy very well. But when I imagine myself saying it, all I can picture next is a hand shaped object traveling 98 miles per hour towards my face. Instead, how about you picture a girl laughing at something clever and witty you said...? You should expect it. Also, I can imagine that being 'creepy' is more acceptable depending on how familiar I am with the girl and the context of our relationship. "Creepy" is a fiction you make up in your own mind. If you strike out with a girl, it isn't because you were "creepy"...it was because she wasn't receptive to your humor and wit...perhaps because she wasn't bright enough to understand it (this happens WAY more often that you could possibly imagine)... Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 So went out with a group of friends tonight. One cute girl, just my type. I was a little weary cause she is known to be very conservative. She complimented me on my dancing so I am pretty sure she likes me. If I was good at dancing or even mediocre then the compliment would make sense. I was my usual charming self --> She gave me her number. I am going to call her should I wait 3 days or 5? Sweet, dude. Call her when you want to talk to her or make plans with her...don't be artificial with all those bullsh*t games... Her compliment to your dancing is just something she picked that was related to a personality feature or skill (i.e., non-physical attribute) to show that she valued something in you...that's winning. I expect you to go on and do great things. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 I am guessing that is directed am me...ouch. Do you think you do anything that can be considered creepy or do you repress? BTW, how did things get started with the girl tonight? It's your thread, dish Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 For me, creepy is anything relating to sex or certain body parts. I can't imagine expressing the slightest hint of sexual interest in a girl that won't result in her anger or disgust. Well, that's because you are uncomfortable going in that direction with a girl you just met...that's why you associate sex talk with creepy...and probably for good reason... Stimulate the woman's intellect and sense of humor first...and the sexual interest will naturally follow... Link to post Share on other sites
cerridwen Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 I am guessing that is directed am me...ouch. No, I wasn't thinking of you at all, P. For the record, I think you have Personality Plus. You're just lacking the confidence to show it. Nothing wrong with that. Confidence can be gained. Like USMCPickle, just practice and take some risks. Right now, as you are, you're perfect, complete. Your personality is in there and its a good one. Once you start deconstructing some of your prior beliefs, once you stop hiding that personality candle under a bushel, you'll shine just fine. I have no doubts. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 Well, that's because you are uncomfortable going in that direction with a girl you just met...that's why you associate sex talk with creepy...and probably for good reason... Stimulate the woman's intellect and sense of humor first...and the sexual interest will naturally follow... I actually don't have much trouble doing the intellect and humor stuff when I'm in the mood for it. But the sexual stuff never comes. I think I'm waiting for a signal from her that it's sexy time and obviously that's not how real life works. Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 For the record, I think you have Personality Plus. You're just lacking the confidence to show it. Nothing wrong with that. Confidence can be gained. Like USMCPickle, just practice and take some risks. I tend to disagree slightly with this...if he's anything like me, it's not that he lacks confidence to show it, it's that he lacks the confidence to accept that his personality makes a woman sexually interested in him and actually act on it...he can make a woman smile and laugh all night, but if he's not willing to take the initiative and convert the friendly energy to sexual energy, then he's going home alone... Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 But the sexual stuff never comes. I think I'm waiting for a signal from her that it's sexy time and obviously that's not how real life works. You don't need a signal. You create your own green light. If she's receptive, then good for you. If not, then move on. The green light should not be based on her signal, but the signal you give yourself that this girl is actually worthy of your time and effort...the getting-to-know process is not for her to get interested in you, but for you to get interested in HER... And I understand all these words probably come off as blah blah blah, and I'm sure if it were someone else saying it to me, I'd call their bullsh*t and ignore it...but you've got to get to a place where you just say f*ck it and know you're the sh*t...even if you've got to fake it for a while...so be it... Link to post Share on other sites
Author ptp Posted March 3, 2012 Author Share Posted March 3, 2012 Do you think you do anything that can be considered creepy or do you repress? BTW, how did things get started with the girl tonight? It's your thread, dish No I usually get the opposite of creepy. In fact towards the end tonight this girl told me she could tell I was "one of the nice guys" Went out to this bar, 5 girls 6 guys. I knew of these people didn't know these people except for my 1 friend. Actually one of the guys was very "creepy", he made the rest of us normal guys seem stellar, because he was making the girls uncomfortable. . I targeted her from the start, but kind of ignored her initially, sat down next to her friend and chatted up the friend. Then we went to go "dance" aka grind. When we took a break and were walking back to our table, she said how good of a dancer I was...in front of everybody...it was awkward. So this time, instead of sitting next to her friend, I sat next to her and talked to her. Later in the night, I needed to get $ from the atm, so I told her to come with me and it gave us a few minutes outside in the quiet. At the end of the night asked for her #. I really wasn't really touchy feely except for a few half-hugs in the cold and I didn't compliment her on her looks either sooo I still need a lot of work. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 No, the words are not coming across as blah blah blah but more like 外国語 Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 No, the words are not coming across as blah blah blah but more like 外国語 :laugh: Well played, my friend. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 (edited) No I usually get the opposite of creepy. In fact towards the end tonight this girl told me she could tell I was "one of the nice guys" Went out to this bar, 5 girls 6 guys. I knew of these people didn't know these people except for my 1 friend. Actually one of the guys was very "creepy", he made the rest of us normal guys seem stellar, because he was making the girls uncomfortable. . I targeted her from the start, but kind of ignored her initially, sat down next to her friend and chatted up the friend. Then we went to go "dance" aka grind. When we took a break and were walking back to our table, she said how good of a dancer I was...in front of everybody...it was awkward. So you didn't talk to her at all and the she randomly brings up that you're a good dance. Man, can I barrow your luck? So this time, instead of sitting next to her friend, I sat next to her and talked to her. Later in the night, I needed to get $ from the atm, so I told her to come with me and it gave us a few minutes outside in the quiet. At the end of the night asked for her #. I really wasn't really touchy feely except for a few half-hugs in the cold and I didn't compliment her on her looks either sooo I still need a lot of work. But you did take the reins and told her to come with you. But damn, sounds like she was into you from the start. If you gave her a compliment, she would have totally bought it. :laugh: Well played, my friend. Were you able to read it? I know you're Chinese but Japanese kanji isn't that different right? Edited March 3, 2012 by somedude81 Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 I know you're Chinese but Japanese kanji isn't that different right? Wouldn't have made a lick of difference. :laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 Wouldn't have made a lick of difference. :laugh: Just in case, that's actually Japanese kanji for 'foreign language' So it was a double joke ----- But seriously, I'm trying to understand what you mean. Link to post Share on other sites
cerridwen Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 Man, can I barrow your luck? Come on now. Luck? He made it happen. Step One: He was out of the house with friends dancing. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 Come on now. Luck? He made it happen. Step One: He was out of the house with friends dancing. I've been on that step a few more times than you'd think, yes with friends, yes + girls. And I'm not talking just Salsa clubs either. Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 I've been on that step a few more times than you'd think, yes with friends, yes + girls. And I'm not talking just Salsa clubs either. Check Off Topic...I have a proposition... Link to post Share on other sites
Author ptp Posted March 3, 2012 Author Share Posted March 3, 2012 I really like this girl. One the guys had a wrist guard on his hand and she was the only girl who actually helped him out. The other girls couldn't be bothered. I am very found of women who are genuinely nice, who are kind when they don't have to be. Man, can I barrow your luck? Whatever dude. She isn't C cup or better, so if you were in my place it wouldn't have mattered. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 Whatever dude. She isn't C cup or better, so if you were in my place it wouldn't have mattered. I'm not trying to completely put you down, but would you say that you had to work that hard? I've always heard that when a girl likes you, she'll make things easy for you. Link to post Share on other sites
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