Distant78 Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 So you guys feel that when a woman posts a thread, she gets ways more sympathy than men? Yes, especially in the OM/OW board.
Author Woggle Posted February 26, 2011 Author Posted February 26, 2011 So you guys feel that when a woman posts a thread, she gets ways more sympathy than men? That's not the feeling I get. I see a lot of generous posters from both genders who give sympathy to both genders. I however fail to see threads where women get magic free passes. If a woman wrote : I kill kittens, she would get slandered. Heck, if a woman posts threads saying "I hate when guys check me out", she gets slandered. I feel your perception that women get a free pass is greatly exaggerated. I don't remember who it was but I remember a thread where a woman was cheating on her husband. The OM dumped her once she showed interest in divorcing her husband for him and everybody was treating her as if she was the innocent victim in the situation. I want to say that not all women do this. There are plenty of women who are fair on this board but it turned my stomach to see people acting like she was the betrayed party and her husband was just chopped liver.
Kamille Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 ah! I don't really frequent the OW/OM or the infidelity forums. The thing with those boards is that they are so overwhelmingly feminine! But even then, when an OM posts, he' usually pretty well treated. Those boards always make me wonder where the wayward spouses posts though.
Alma Mobley Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 You have to understand that misandry is much more suble than misogyny. You see it with somebody like Megandoll who outright said that men deserve to be cheated on and you see it in the threads where a woman who is blatantly wrong will get sympathy a man will never get. Hi Woggle, I've often seen you use Megandoll as an example of a female LS poster who writes misandrist posts and threads. Megandoll is a troll and probably a man, as her other two incarnations that I know of are AD1980, a short, "average" guy who can't get dates and SteveC80, the tall handsome dude who always gets dates. They all three post about the same things with the same writing style and like to stir stuff up. AD1980: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?p=3093691#post3093691 Good job..The Taller women seem to have less of a problem not dating a tall guy then the really short girls who need to be a foot smaller then their Man and look like a child next to him to feel feminine..and http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?p=3080036#post3080036 I know people say its Men with unrealsitic expectations but as a single guy i see tons of ordinary women feel entitled to the top few percent of Men for whaetver reason.. Im just looking for a girl im somewhat physcially attracted to but it seems women would rather hold out for the Men every other women wants then "settle" for somebody on there level of the social food chain.. SteveC80: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?p=3145423#post3145423 Allot of plain average girls are picky becasue they have allot more options then your average looking Men and maybe higher standards AS a Man you may have to go for a women whos lower on the looks ladder then yourselfand http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?p=3139497#post3139497 You dont have to even say anyhting wrong these days just being an ugly Man can get you called creepy if you approach women Finally, MeganDoll: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?p=3122251#post3122251 It depends,as a Man every inch your under 5'10 take a point off so if youre 5'9 with a 9 face you're an 8 and so on and http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?p=3033433#post3033433 WHo didnt know this? Women love Tall Men. If you short guys stopped whining and lowered your standards you could get some of the plain janes who tall guys ignoreI noticed this a long time ago but was reluctant to point it out, but I just see this MeganDoll person being taken way too seriously. It took me 5 mins to find those quotes and paste 'em. Didn't take long to find representative samples at all.
Author Woggle Posted February 26, 2011 Author Posted February 26, 2011 Steve C80 is a bit extreme but I imagine being a model and having married women throw themselves at him will warp his perspective a bit. He mentions he has been the OM a few times and that is where his mistrust of women comes from. OW usually don't think too highly of men either.
Alma Mobley Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Steve C80 is a bit extreme but I imagine being a model and having married women throw themselves at him will warp his perspective a bit. He mentions he has been the OM a few times and that is where his mistrust of women comes from. OW usually don't think too highly of men either. Out of those three identities, I suspect the real one is more like AD1980, but I could be wrong.
sally4sara Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Like I asked, when do you ever see posts like this /\/\/\ from bitter women? Whats the point in empathy for that? They'd get more if they dialed down the hate.
Author Woggle Posted February 26, 2011 Author Posted February 26, 2011 Like I asked, when do you ever see posts like this /\/\/\ from bitter women? Whats the point in empathy for that? That i can't defend. Jersey Shortie used to get pretty bitter sometimes though.
somedude81 Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Like I asked, when do you ever see posts like this /\/\/\ from bitter women? Whats the point in empathy for that? They'd get more if they dialed down the hate. Why do you even pay attention to obvious trolls? The only "bitter men" that post nothing but mean remarks are nothing but trolls who get a rise out of the attention.
Kamille Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 That i can't defend. Jersey Shortie used to get pretty bitter sometimes though. But she never purposefully expressed random cheap free hatred of the kind S4S pointed to above. I know they're just trolls. Yet we routinely see that kind of bitterness/hatred expressed towards women on this site. Everyday. Several times a day. I know it's just trolls. I know that - but the very fact that people enjoy participating in spreading that kind of hatred is disturbing. Asking me to ignore those kinds of post is like asking another kind of minority to tolerate the N-word, the swatzika, etc. I mean, seriously guys? Do you not see these trolls as a problem? Not just here - but as a general symptom of hatred towards women in society?
Author Woggle Posted February 26, 2011 Author Posted February 26, 2011 I see trolls on other boards expressing this kind of hatred against men. I can show you some websites that outright advocate killing men. I agree though that people who express this kind of outright hatred should get empathy from either gender. I hate it when men are talked about like that so I understand why women who do fit these stereotypes would be offended as well. I do think I am doing a lot better in expressing my points of view without hatred though. If am willing to condemn this stuff can more women on here condemn women on here who outright treat men like garbage with no remorse?
Kamille Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 If am willing to condemn this stuff can more women on here condemn women on here who outright treat men like garbage with no remorse? Can we also include men who show no remorse about treating women like garbage?
Author Woggle Posted February 26, 2011 Author Posted February 26, 2011 Can we also include men who show no remorse about treating women like garbage? Yes. How about both genders condemn this kind of treatment of other human beings all together?
somedude81 Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 I mean, seriously guys? Do you not see these trolls as a problem? Not just here - but as a general symptom of hatred towards women in society? LOL no. I see as annoying pricks who just like to cause trouble. You're reading too deep into it. Why have I seen this sort of thread a countless number of times, rehashing the same views and insults over and over and over again? Can't you all just realize that a lot of these people are just looking for attention? I doubt they're really that hateful in reality, they just like to act like, for lack of better word, attention whores. You people are going to become what you hate by giving in and stooping yourself to their levels. If you've got a healthy outlook, you shouldn't be letting these jackasses warp your mind.. I mean, herp derp Cover blown?
Kamille Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Yes. How about both genders condemn this kind of treatment of other human beings all together? Deal! I'm in!
jane100 Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 .... What I see is bitter guys driving female posters away and crass, insulting male posters creating threads not to even get advise, but to actually stir up resentments - and these don't just get male empathy but also GLORY and ENCOURAGEMENT with a couple of guys telling them their being an ass. Unfortunately true. One other thing I notice is when new, young female members come with their problems, quite a few of the young bitter men really start attacking her, sometimes post after post. I have noticed this a few times. And I am sorry that more grown up and interesting men don't take them to task - they would probably only respect that unfortunately. Anyway on a positive note, there are still some great posters here, especially female but also some interesting men, so I am still here for now .
Mrlonelyone Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Part of the reason that women have so little sympathy for men who are bitter in dating is because men and women have very different perspectives on dating. At girls ask guys I did a survey... it's still ongoing. I asked: True or false? Women have to date allot of losers to find a good man. Men have to ask out allot of women just to find a date. Current Poll Results Girls Guys All A: True 27 34 61 (56%) B: False 36 12 48 (44%) I draw attention to the distribution of girls and guys. Notice that among women. 42% agree that men have to ask out allot more women just to find a date. While 73% of men agree with the proposition. 58% of women disagree. 58% of women don't see what 73% of men do! Given that disconnect no wonder most women just can't empathize with what men go through in the dating game. So lets all just accept that men and women are different. Due in some part to our nature... and some part to the way our society nurture's us... the dating game is different for both of us. Ladies when giving dating advice to a man have the humility to realize that your perspective...your frame of reference...is very different from a mans. Men need to do the same.
sally4sara Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Unfortunately true. One other thing I notice is when new, young female members come with their problems, quite a few of the young bitter men really start attacking her, sometimes post after post. I have noticed this a few times. And I am sorry that more grown up and interesting men don't take them to task - they would probably only respect that unfortunately. Anyway on a positive note, there are still some great posters here, especially female but also some interesting men, so I am still here for now . Well, pretty often we will see some young girl come on here with a story about some relationship mess she is predominantly responsible for creating while being rather oblivious to her own hand it creating it. Part of helping them is pointing that out to them. Without it, they'd still bop around doing it over and over, and asking others why they end up in these situations. But yes, there are better ways to get through to them than letting the troll brigade attack them. Its not like they are talking about their mess as though its the only way to handle it because all men this or that or telling others to do as they do because its all men deserve. I mean hell, just a page or to back in this thread, one dropped in to target me and was told their view is VALUABLE. Doing this is only going to see a larger disparity in empathy extended. Align yourself with trash and people will be less inclined towards showing you empathy. Its like cheering on the facebook guy Woggle was talking about. Do that and I'm suppose to feel empathy for you? Nah, go get your empathy from the trashy jerks you find so amusing.
jane100 Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 (edited) I just feel sorry sometimes for the younger women who come on here and get trashed. They are not always to blame for "the mess" they find themselves in either as you say, far from it. I agree sometimes "Telling it like it is" - from a male perspective - can be illuminating and cut through a lot. But that is not what I meant by "attack". Two different things. Edited February 26, 2011 by jane100
Author Woggle Posted February 26, 2011 Author Posted February 26, 2011 Part of the reason that women have so little sympathy for men who are bitter in dating is because men and women have very different perspectives on dating. At girls ask guys I did a survey... it's still ongoing. I asked: True or false? Women have to date allot of losers to find a good man. Men have to ask out allot of women just to find a date. Current Poll Results Girls Guys All A: True 27 34 61 (56%) B: False 36 12 48 (44%) I draw attention to the distribution of girls and guys. Notice that among women. 42% agree that men have to ask out allot more women just to find a date. While 73% of men agree with the proposition. 58% of women disagree. 58% of women don't see what 73% of men do! Given that disconnect no wonder most women just can't empathize with what men go through in the dating game. So lets all just accept that men and women are different. Due in some part to our nature... and some part to the way our society nurture's us... the dating game is different for both of us. Ladies when giving dating advice to a man have the humility to realize that your perspective...your frame of reference...is very different from a mans. Men need to do the same. Exactly. I think we both need to accept that men and women have very different experiences and perspectives and it would both of us if we understood and empathized with those perspectives.
Author Woggle Posted February 26, 2011 Author Posted February 26, 2011 Well, pretty often we will see some young girl come on here with a story about some relationship mess she is predominantly responsible for creating while being rather oblivious to her own hand it creating it. Part of helping them is pointing that out to them. Without it, they'd still bop around doing it over and over, and asking others why they end up in these situations. But yes, there are better ways to get through to them than letting the troll brigade attack them. Its not like they are talking about their mess as though its the only way to handle it because all men this or that or telling others to do as they do because its all men deserve. I mean hell, just a page or to back in this thread, one dropped in to target me and was told their view is VALUABLE. Doing this is only going to see a larger disparity in empathy extended. Align yourself with trash and people will be less inclined towards showing you empathy. Its like cheering on the facebook guy Woggle was talking about. Do that and I'm suppose to feel empathy for you? Nah, go get your empathy from the trashy jerks you find so amusing. If you notice I did take him to task for insulting you. I don't want to cheer on this facebook guy but from the perspective of many men it seems that guys like him get all the rewards while her BF who from everything she says is a wondeful is about to get crapped on. Do you understand how this looks to a single man looking for love? We are told everyday how there are no good men left and how men need to act better and all that jazz and here you have a man who does that and gets crapped on for player on facebook. Can you understand how that looks to your average man. I don't endorse the player mentality but sometimes I feel that if that is what women like and some seem like they do why not give it to them?
Mrlonelyone Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Woggle... let me put it this way. Women don't like it.. (Some of them) just reward it with sex and companionship. I added "some of them" just so I would not be accused of generalization.
sally4sara Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 If you notice I did take him to task for insulting you. I don't want to cheer on this facebook guy but from the perspective of many men it seems that guys like him get all the rewards while her BF who from everything she says is a wondeful is about to get crapped on. Do you understand how this looks to a single man looking for love? We are told everyday how there are no good men left and how men need to act better and all that jazz and here you have a man who does that and gets crapped on for player on facebook. Can you understand how that looks to your average man. I don't endorse the player mentality but sometimes I feel that if that is what women like and some seem like they do why not give it to them? Its like how you and I went through our childhood experiences and then felt drawn to the people we chose for our first committed relationships. They got in under our radars for seeming normal to us. I get that neither we or the guy in the thread your exampled DESERVE the treatment we get, but we didn't get it because of our gender or the gender of the people who hurt us. We have a responsibility to recognize WE CHOSE to be in those relationships and we can choose differently. The BF in that thread also has that responsibility; he doesn't have to date crappy PEOPLE. Not crappy women, not crappy men, but crappy people. Its not happening to him because he is a guy. His GF isn't the way she is because she is female, its because she is a broken PERSON. Like you and I were when we chose our exes. You and I could help her realize there is a better way to be. I'm not better for helping her just because I'm female. You're not less capable for being male. And if we could help her - there is one less good person getting caught in the splash like what is happening to her BF right now. And maybe her BF is broken too, he doesn't have to be with her. I'm sure there have been signs he overlooked that have him finding her acceptable enough to be in a relationship with. Its when we tolerate people like facebook guy, admire them and entertain their presence that we are going back to our old ways. Dealing with people like that is like letting your mom back in your life when you know what it brings and the damage it can cause. And yes, I noticed you got on him for his attitude. Thank you.
Author Woggle Posted February 26, 2011 Author Posted February 26, 2011 You are right and maybe it is just a hard for a good woman to find a man who truly appreciates it. I will give them the benefit of the doubt on that. I don't admire facebook guy but it's messed up that people like him seem to always hit the love lottery. I told you about my friend who was cheated on three times in a row and now is pretty much some douchebag player. I don't condone the way he is now but how can I tell him to go back to being a nice guy when it brought him nothing but pain? It's not just relationships either. I grew up around a lot of criminal types and I also grew up around a lot of hardworking working class people who broke their back everyday and yet struggled their entire life. On the other hand the criminals and the shiesters lived the high life and had it good. While the good and honest people had to save up to go to the movies the criminals took nice vacations. The only reason I do so well is my uncle taught me how to buy and sell stocks and make good money off of it. I would rather be an honest person in every aspect of life but I really can't blame somebody for deciding they would rather not be a martyr for a goodness and doing whatever it takes to not be bottom of the barrel.
Untouchable_Fire Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Like I asked, when do you ever see posts like this /\/\/\ from bitter women? Whats the point in empathy for that? They'd get more if they dialed down the hate. You give them so much empathy and sympathy that they just don't get bitter or frustrated. If you treated them the way you treat guys like WayneBrady you would see some super bitter angry women. However, here just as in real life... they get emotional support while the guys get treated like broken toys to be tossed out. So you guys feel that when a woman posts a thread, she gets ways more sympathy than men? That's not the feeling I get. I see a lot of generous posters from both genders who give sympathy to both genders. I however fail to see threads where women get magic free passes. If a woman wrote : I kill kittens, she would get slandered. Heck, if a woman posts threads saying "I hate when guys check me out", she gets slandered. I feel your perception that women get a free pass is greatly exaggerated. They do get a free pass. They blame whatever man is in their life and suddenly its all backpatting and high fives. I would say 1/3-2/3 of the women in the OW forum are MOW and they get 24/7 sympathy. Anyone who breaks that rule gets flamed and later banned. ah! I don't really frequent the OW/OM or the infidelity forums. The thing with those boards is that they are so overwhelmingly feminine! But even then, when an OM posts, he' usually pretty well treated. Those boards always make me wonder where the wayward spouses posts though. Unfortunately true. One other thing I notice is when new, young female members come with their problems, quite a few of the young bitter men really start attacking her, sometimes post after post. I have noticed this a few times. And I am sorry that more grown up and interesting men don't take them to task - they would probably only respect that unfortunately. Anyway on a positive note, there are still some great posters here, especially female but also some interesting men, so I am still here for now . A little bit of criticism should not rock your world. A good chunk of those young female posters are causing their own problems. Actually go in and really look deep at the advice many of those young girls are given. Many times female LS members just blame the guy.
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