zengirl Posted February 14, 2011 Share Posted February 14, 2011 If you really want to know why a guy might not get a woman something for V day even if he is interested consider the following. Thread:Is it too soon for flowers? Well, I do think your situation is different because you know the woman, so sending her something is nice enough. Also, a lot of the objections there were about the idea of sending something to her work. That would bother a lot of people who keep their private lives out of the workplace. Anyway, as for expecting such things from the several men that are interested in me is what multi-dating is about. The one's who don't put in time, effort, or anything else will get forgotten. Why waste my time or yours? You either show interest or lose my number, thanks. That's how I see it. Not everyone will agree, but that's their standards, I have mine. So how does a man become invested in a woman? If he never makes effort to date or show interest? The amount of effort you seem to want seems to be disproportionate to your relationship with them. I'm not saying men shouldn't show interest (women should, too), but expecting too much, too soon, is going to weed out some of the best guys, who are serious about relationships, and not going to be exuberant just to get in your pants. It's the players who will live up to your standards, in terms of things like gifts and such, in the beginning, and then the rare, true romantics IF they feel you could potentially be The One, but that situation is rare early on. Wait for it, if you want, but sounds like a recipe for disappointment to me. Most good realationships begin slow and steady, and most good guys don't want to have to jump through hoops for someone in order to get her to even consider focusing on them. Link to post Share on other sites
Ay Diesel T Posted February 14, 2011 Share Posted February 14, 2011 The way that some of these respondents made it sound as if, "well, what do you I get in return?" implies that they want something more in order for me to deserve a date or a simple valentines gesture showing interest. Which I pointed out that I will not do, because I am not that type of lose woman. Anyway, as for expecting such things from the several men that are interested in me is what multi-dating is about. The one's who don't put in time, effort, or anything else will get forgotten. Why waste my time or yours? You either show interest or lose my number, thanks. That's how I see it. Not everyone will agree, but that's their standards, I have mine. So how does a man become invested in a woman? If he never makes effort to date or show interest? Personal opinion, but I always figured investing in a woman is taking her out on dates, spending quality time with her, seeing where her head is at, and if she wants the same things as you do relationship wise. To me, all this would come before the gift giving and celebratory actions on specific occasions such as Valentine's Day. If I just met a woman, right before Valentine's Day, I'd at least send her a text wishing her a Happy Valentine's Day and offer to take her out for dinner. But I wouldn't do a card, flowers, or chocolates. To me, that has a bit more meaning and emotion tied to it rather than the gesture to celebrate Valentine's Day with a lovely woman you're trying to get to know a bit more over a nice candle lit dinner. The dinner may be more expensive, but cards and such have more meaning to them. It just sounds pretentious to expect this from people who you barely know that's all. I understand where you're coming from though. Everyone is entitled to their preferences and approach on dating. Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted February 14, 2011 Share Posted February 14, 2011 It just sounds pretentious to expect this from people who you barely know that's all. I understand where you're coming from though. Everyone is entitled to their preferences and approach on dating. lack of substantial dating experience Link to post Share on other sites
bayouboi Posted February 14, 2011 Share Posted February 14, 2011 I really think Steak & BJ day should be in January instead of March. It would put the women on their knees. fixed that for you lol Link to post Share on other sites
Ay Diesel T Posted February 14, 2011 Share Posted February 14, 2011 lack of substantial dating experience Wait, me or the OP? What makes you say that? And lol @ Bayouboi's post. Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted February 14, 2011 Share Posted February 14, 2011 Wait, me or the OP? What makes you say that? And lol @ Bayouboi's post. haha the OP. I was too lazy to type up a full post myself so quoted yours Link to post Share on other sites
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