Author remorseful1980 Posted August 7, 2010 Author Posted August 7, 2010 I received another 2am call from him which I wasn't able to pick up. I am wondering - were these just drunk calls? Because when I respond thru texts, during daytime, he doesn't reply. I am beginning to hate him.
Gallaxia Posted August 7, 2010 Posted August 7, 2010 Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Remorseful1980, if you've tied all your loose ends & gotten back all your stuff and he his, maybe it'd be best to change your number. Wait, you're leaving the area, right?
TaraMaiden Posted August 7, 2010 Posted August 7, 2010 At 2am? I'm sorry...in all probability, yes..... So he calls you in the dead of night, but won't pick up or respond during the day? You're beginning to hate him? I'M beginning to hate him! He's being such a jerk! Ok, turn it all off, and delete whatever you get.... But DO NOT Respond! And do not try to contact him! It's fruitless, hopeless, and has no point but to perpetuate more pain, heartache and despair. You know that...... right?
Author remorseful1980 Posted August 8, 2010 Author Posted August 8, 2010 (edited) Gallaxia: I haven't gotten my stuff back, and I do need those (my guitar, almost brand new swimsuits, a couple of nice dresses, perfume and a pair of shoes). I, on the other hand, has this mp3 player that was a gift to him (has sentimental value). I don't know what to do. I don't want this to drag on, and this weekend we were supposed to meet up to talk and exhange things. I texted him that I'm back from vacation but so far he hasn't contacted me. Should I contact him to get this over with? And yes, I'm tying loose ends here, moving at a new place early September. I will try to change my number and email addresses. Taramaiden[/b]: I want to quit trying to read his mind. And yes I know I should not engage him anymore in this "push-and-pull" behavior. However, I want my stuff back, it's worth $600. Should I get my stuff back right away (tomorrow)? Edited August 8, 2010 by remorseful1980
TaraMaiden Posted August 8, 2010 Posted August 8, 2010 Remorseful: This is what I advise you to do. And please - if you want to stay sane, please - follow through. Have a good friend go with you. Tell her exactly what you are going back for. Itemise it. Describe it. Write it down. Then go with her to pick your things up. STAY in the VEHICLE. Get HER to go pick them up. If this is not possible, get her to stay with you the whole time, to stop you engaging in stupid, futile, amorous, pointless little scenarios which will just keep you rooted in one place and struggling in pain. Tell her "Whatever happens, do not leave me alone with him. Even if I tell you 'it's ok, you can wait in the car' - don't. Stay with me, and if necessary put duct tape across my mouth and tie my hands behind my back." If you do this on your own - you will, inevitably crumble. If you have someone loyal you can lean on - this will give you the strength to do what you must do.
Author remorseful1980 Posted August 8, 2010 Author Posted August 8, 2010 ^I wish I can grab a friend just like that. I isolated myself during this break-up because I don't want to burden my friends and my family (again). My previous relationship ended up so badly (lying, cheating, stalking) that I was absolutely broken down as a person. It was the first time in my life as an adult that I laid down my head on my mother's lap and cried. A friend took care of me for three months, I slept on her bed because I was terrified of being alone. They are tired of me. This is why I kept quiet about this break-up. I'm sure they know by now but no one has tried to contact me.
Author remorseful1980 Posted August 8, 2010 Author Posted August 8, 2010 I am so close to contacting him to get my stuff back, plus ask him many questions. He is not the type to play games like this, he has been pretty straight-forward with everything. And he answers all messages right away (he has a PR job, he is permanently attached to his phone). He has received my texts and chose to ignore them). For what? I don't understand this. I am awake in the middle of the night. I took sleeping pills already but I am too anxious, stressed. My tummy hurts. The only thing that is stopping me from texting him is the quote I read here somewhere: "The one who cares less holds the most power."
TaraMaiden Posted August 8, 2010 Posted August 8, 2010 I don't care. Ring someone. Beg them to help you. Ask them please, to support you in this final gesture. Tell them you just ask this one thing, because tired as they may be of hearing it, it's ripping you apart and you feel very alone. That quotation is absolutely spot-on. He's playing mind-games, and you have to fight through that, with rage and indignation, and every fibre of resistance you can muster. Don't be a mess. Gather up all your dignity and self-esteem, and go through with this. Once out on the other side, you'll find yourself stronger and more able to withstand his puppet-string pulling.....
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