Should the OW/OM attend the children's sporting events...even inconspicuously?

[bittersweet memories]

Seriously, you have no idea the hell this b*tch has put me through, her kids through, and her xH. She is much like OWoman's H's xW. And I think I have every right to be angry given what she pulled, and what he pulled. But you really have no business judging me.

 

 

Hello!! Look @ the hell you put her through..sleeping with her freakin husband..How easy we forget!!

[bittersweet memories]

I was alerted to that thread, but unable to log in, so I couldn't comment on it, and didn't get to see whatever posts this might be referring to, but I'm as mystified as anyone else as to what "fiction" I've been posting on LS.

 

If Susmay or anyone else can enighten me, I'd be grateful

 

 

Sure just go ahead and log into your blog...

 

Just login in your Name...and password:rolleyes: and read:rolleyes:

 

You know exactly what we're talking about!:rolleyes: Shame on YOU!!

[OWoman]

Sure just go ahead and log into your blog...

 

Just login in your Name...and password:rolleyes: and read:rolleyes:

 

You know exactly what we're talking about!:rolleyes: Shame on YOU!!

 

You've also not answered the question I asked - what alleged "fiction" have I posted on LS? I believe I asked for information, not insults - if you can't provide the former, there is no need to supply the latter.

[OWoman]

Hello!! Look @ the hell you put her through..sleeping with her freakin husband..How easy we forget!!

 

uhm - I think you mean xHusband....

[bittersweet memories]

uhm - I think you mean xHusband....

 

Uhm....Not while she was "first" screwing him! Of course now he is.

[Lizzie60]

I haven't read the thread.. but I can't remember any of my MM asking me that kind of stuff.. it would be NOOOOOOO...

 

I love my grand kids to death.. I would attend any sporting/artistic events from them.. but my MM's kids.. no way.. I have no emotional connection to them...

 

I would think it would be 'stupid' from the MM to ask such a thing..

 

I have always separated HIS family from MY life..

 

Some have showed me or often talked about their kids.. and that's fine.. they are proud fathers.. but to ask me to attend a sporting event.. hummm... NO. I am very busy woman.. no time for other's kids.. plus I have no interest to do that..

[turnstone]

You've also not answered the question I asked - what alleged "fiction" have I posted on LS? I believe I asked for information, not insults - if you can't provide the former, there is no need to supply the latter.

 

Give it a rest, stop thread jacking and take it to PMs if you're that bothered, but remember that no one has to give you an answer so you may as well stop appearing like you're demanding one. It seems the only person banging on about this is you, no one else is asking so really, who cares what was said? It could only have been supposition, no one could have been defaming you, if that's what you're scraping the barrel for - besides, they hardly need to, your blog has done that all on its own it'd seem. If it'll make you happy, I'll say that I believe your blog is a work of overly dramatized fiction, which naturally leads me to wonder if the rest of what you write on the Internet is also.

[Susmay]

You've also not answered the question I asked - what alleged "fiction" have I posted on LS? I believe I asked for information, not insults - if you can't provide the former, there is no need to supply the latter.

 

First of all this appeared to be directed at me although I was not the poster you feel has insulted you.

 

Secondly it is clearly a T/J so would it be better to set up a separate thread? I'll leave that up to you OWoman depending on how interested you are in pursuing this.

 

I posted a list of facts and asked you to correct them if erroneous. As you haven't, it is assumed they were ... well ... factual.

 

As for opinions on fiction this was what I received an infraction for, presumably instigated by you or friends of yours, so you can't really expect me to go there again.

 

However I will say that the suggestion of fiction or artistic/writers' license on your blogs was raised on the original thread by people who I think you might normally consider to be your supporters. Personally I have no problem with some artistic license in blogs anyway.

 

As for whether any fiction ever carries over to your posts on Loveshack, the answer to that is best coming from you. Nevertheless other posters will draw their own conclusions about that, knowing what is posted in your blog.

[MizFit]

Hello!! Look @ the hell you put her through..sleeping with her freakin husband..How easy we forget!!

 

The WS is the one who put his W through hell and brought someone into the marriage that he eventually chose to carry on a full time relationship with. If the BS has an axe to grind it's with him.

[MizFit]

First of all this appeared to be directed at me although I was not the poster you feel has insulted you.

 

Secondly it is clearly a T/J so would it be better to set up a separate thread? I'll leave that up to you OWoman depending on how interested you are in pursuing this.

 

I posted a list of facts and asked you to correct them if erroneous. As you haven't, it is assumed they were ... well ... factual.

 

As for opinions on fiction this was what I received an infraction for, presumably instigated by you or friends of yours, so you can't really expect me to go there again.

 

However I will say that the suggestion of fiction or artistic/writers' license on your blogs was raised on the original thread by people who I think you might normally consider to be your supporters. Personally I have no problem with some artistic license in blogs anyway.

 

As for whether any fiction ever carries over to your posts on Loveshack, the answer to that is best coming from you. Nevertheless other posters will draw their own conclusions about that, knowing what is posted in your blog.

 

I am not responding to your post for any reason other than it was the last of several that allude to the fact OWoman has some sort of posse on here. She doesn't...well at least if she does I'm not part of it...

 

I believe I was the first one on the now defunct thread that mentioned artistic license and hoped that was the case because it would have been particularly disturbing if that was a 'true' post. I still stand by the fact it was embelishment, but that is clearly nothing more than my opinion.

 

I also am taking great exception to the fact that there is this perception that we all rally around one poster and support them, worship them. I think worship and goddess were 2 words that were used in that original thread as well. I agree with some of the things OWoman says and I disagree with some. I find some of her sociological comments and observations very interesting and some have made me think out of the box. I can say exactly the same of Owl, JustJoe, White Flower, JThorne, Marlena and any number of others from all corners of the affair.

 

Please would everyone stop making it sound like we have secret OW meetings where we sit around and worship someone...we're just people struggling with all sorts of things, just like everyone else. If I'm wrong and there is a meeting and I haven't qualified for the decoder ring to get the password yet, then I'm sorry for speaking in ignorance.

 

Sorry...I didn't mean to jump into a threadjack, but I really have been wanting to put to rest some of the almost snide comments about 'friends' and the perception of us versus them that is sending out.

 

Now...back to our regularly scheduled programming...

[Fallen Angel]

Please would everyone stop making it sound like we have secret OW meetings where we sit around and worship someone...we're just people struggling with all sorts of things, just like everyone else. If I'm wrong and there is a meeting and I haven't qualified for the decoder ring to get the password yet, then I'm sorry for speaking in ignorance...

 

The decoder ring will be arriving shortly in an unmarked package on your door-step. Please decode the password soonest as the ring will self destruct in five.. four.. three..

[MizFit]

The decoder ring will be arriving shortly in an unmarked package on your door-step. Please decode the password soonest as the ring will self destruct in five.. four.. three..

 

Too funny FA...take it your meds are taking hold now, or is it the liquor? Hope you're feeling better!

[TinaniT]

The decoder ring will be arriving shortly in an unmarked package on your door-step. Please decode the password soonest as the ring will self destruct in five.. four.. three..

 

On the doorstep? I thought the MM had to buy it for us with money he takes from his wife's grocery money and kid's piggy bank whilst they slept?

[Fallen Angel]

Too funny FA...take it your meds are taking hold now, or is it the liquor? Hope you're feeling better!

 

lmao.. the steroid they have me on acts somewhat like speed for the first day or so... hence the "I can not sleep factor"... and the pain med with the codine for my throat and horrific headache has me somewhat loopy.. hence the "I am almost funny like this factor".. the can't spell or type properly factor is always with me lmaoooooooooooo.. but I am happy!!

[Fallen Angel]

On the doorstep? I thought the MM had to buy it for us with money he takes from his wife's grocery money and kid's piggy bank whilst they slept?

 

aaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahaha.. he did already .. with the prepaid mastercard he bought with all the nickles, dimes and pennies (darned kids spent all the quaters on ice creams from the ding-ding man! Damnit!!!)

[NoIDidn't]

Hey can we get this thread back on target?

 

I certainly didn't start it to talk about OWoman's blog.

 

It seems most posters feel that attending a child's sporting event without the request of BOTH parents is likened to stalking.

[TinaniT]

Sorry. I just like playing around sometimes.

 

 

I would not attend MM's kids games because I think it would make it awkward as we try to move forward together if I'm recognized as having been in their life prior to the relationship becoming "honest" for lack of a better word.

 

I have watched videos of his kids events, or listened in on the cell phone. I care about them already from their relationship to the man I love and from stories of them, and like to know what's going on.

[D-Lish]

Hey can we get this thread back on target?

 

I certainly didn't start it to talk about OWoman's blog.

 

It seems most posters feel that attending a child's sporting event without the request of BOTH parents is likened to stalking.

 

I think it's just plain wrong no matter how you look at it.

 

Once he's left his wife, then all can freely attend, but not before.

 

The kids are a product of the MM and his wife, why should a mistress feel the need to watch? They aren't her kids.

 

Once the affair is exposed, it's a different story.

 

The kind of man that would urge this behaviour is the kind of man that ANY woman should stay away from. If he encourages this, he's not respecting his children. If an OW feels the need to do this, she's not respecting his kids.

[NoIDidn't]

I think it's just plain wrong no matter how you look at it.

 

Once he's left his wife, then all can freely attend, but not before.

 

The kids are a product of the MM and his wife, why should a mistress feel the need to watch? They aren't her kids.

 

Once the affair is exposed, it's a different story.

 

The kind of man that would urge this behaviour is the kind of man that ANY woman should stay away from. If he encourages this, he's not respecting his children. If an OW feels the need to do this, she's not respecting his kids.

 

 

I agree. The person that does this seems to be the type of person that sees the others in their life as objects that they own and control at will.

 

Not exactly relationship material.

[Fallen Angel]

Sorry. I just like playing around sometimes.

 

 

I would not attend MM's kids games because I think it would make it awkward as we try to move forward together if I'm recognized as having been in their life prior to the relationship becoming "honest" for lack of a better word.

 

I have watched videos of his kids events, or listened in on the cell phone. I care about them already from their relationship to the man I love and from stories of them, and like to know what's going on.

 

I too have been invited in to My sweetheart's family life through photos and videos and even cell phone recordings of sweetly sung songs by his grandchild.

 

But like I said, I would think that a personal relationship between myself and his children would first need to be established before I would be willing to attend a public function for them.

 

(Sorry about all my typos, I normally correct them as soon as I post and see them, but I am in a bit of an extended time-out right now and can not alter my posts quickly, so you all will be privy to all my typos for awhile. lol)

[TinaniT]

I too have been invited in to My sweetheart's family life through photos and videos and even cell phone recordings of sweetly sung songs by his grandchild.

 

But like I said, I would think that a personal relationship between myself and his children would first need to be established before I would be willing to attend a public function for them.

 

(Sorry about all my typos, I normally correct them as soon as I post and see them, but I am in a bit of an extended time-out right now and can not alter my posts quickly, so you all will be privy to all my typos for awhile. lol)

 

So, similar thoughts. (Though I'd hesitate to assume negative of someone who didn't feel the personal relationship was so important, especially if their situation was one where a future full-time relationship was not anticipated.)

 

I am thankful you are still here!

[NoIDidn't]

I too have been invited in to My sweetheart's family life through photos and videos and even cell phone recordings of sweetly sung songs by his grandchild.

 

But like I said, I would think that a personal relationship between myself and his children would first need to be established before I would be willing to attend a public function for them.

 

(Sorry about all my typos, I normally correct them as soon as I post and see them, but I am in a bit of an extended time-out right now and can not alter my posts quickly, so you all will be privy to all my typos for awhile. lol)

 

I would play video tapes and sound recordings for my co-workers (if I had any) and friends when they can't see my kids in person doing something that I am proud of. I don't think that should be something that anyone would find stalkerish.

 

I've had many a photo album shown to me by proud grandmas in stores, when I am a complete stranger.

 

There is something odd about showing up at an event where the kids aren't expecting this "stranger". I do remember one time where my dad brought this woman to a high school basketball game (he was married at the time). I ignored her because I know his history, but I was actually quite a bit offended that he was showing me off like some prized animal to this stranger that he was sneaking around with. I didn't like it. This is the only instance I remember at an actual sporting event. He brought his OW around me quite often and I never liked it. Not because of the women, but because of him and whatever manipulative purpose it served for him.

 

It was manipulative. Those women would still ask about me as if they knew me, and as if their "caring" about me was going to influence his decision to stay married or not. It wasn't. I was just something else in his life to talk about.

[Fallen Angel]

So, similar thoughts. (Though I'd hesitate to assume negative of someone who didn't feel the personal relationship was so important, especially if their situation was one where a future full-time relationship was not anticipated.)

 

I am thankful you are still here!

 

I am (still around), though on very shaky ground at the moment. :o:o:cool:

 

I, too, may be less concerned about the need for a personal relationship if I did not anticipate a long-term personal relationship with his children in the future. If there was no expectation of the need for such in the future, then there would be no need for one in order to simply attend a concert or sporting performance once in awhile now.

 

It would be the awkwardness that such an attendance now could create in the future that would make it unreasonable to do now. If that makes sense to anyone but me?

[Fallen Angel]

I would play video tapes and sound recordings for my co-workers (if I had any) and friends when they can't see my kids in person doing something that I am proud of. I don't think that should be something that anyone would find stalkerish.

 

I've had many a photo album shown to me by proud grandmas in stores, when I am a complete stranger.

 

There is something odd about showing up at an event where the kids aren't expecting this "stranger". I do remember one time where my dad brought this woman to a high school basketball game (he was married at the time). I ignored her because I know his history, but I was actually quite a bit offended that he was showing me off like some prized animal to this stranger that he was sneaking around with. I didn't like it. This is the only instance I remember at an actual sporting event. He brought his OW around me quite often and I never liked it. Not because of the women, but because of him and whatever manipulative purpose it served for him.

 

It was manipulative. Those women would still ask about me as if they knew me, and as if their "caring" about me was going to influence his decision to stay married or not. It wasn't. I was just something else in his life to talk about.

 

I would never want his children to feel this way, which is why I would not attend without a personal connection with the children prior to the event.

 

I will say, even though I do not know his children/grandchildren personally, I have come to love them. I know much about their lives, and personalities. Their dreams and goals and fears. Theri strengths and theri weaknesses. I love them because they are so very dear to him. I love them because it is my nature to love good and kind and smart and funny people, and they appear as such from all I know of them. I would hate for them to be hurt by me. I would hate for them to think that I would only care for them as a way of manipulating their father.

 

I do hope that someday I can know them personally. And I hope that they will understand and forgive and accept the love i will offer them.

[NoIDidn't]

I would never want his children to feel this way, which is why I would not attend without a personal connection with the children prior to the event.

 

I will say, even though I do not know his children/grandchildren personally, I have come to love them. I know much about their lives, and personalities. Their dreams and goals and fears. Theri strengths and theri weaknesses. I love them because they are so very dear to him. I love them because it is my nature to love good and kind and smart and funny people, and they appear as such from all I know of them. I would hate for them to be hurt by me. I would hate for them to think that I would only care for them as a way of manipulating their father.

 

I do hope that someday I can know them personally. And I hope that they will understand and forgive and accept the love i will offer them.

 

 

I asked this question of the OM/OW, but really it should be asked of the MP.

 

The only offense I took to the OW was that they continued to pry me with questions, when I was expecting that time to be mine with my dad (mom and stepmom never came, not into sports, plus young kids at home too young to bring along).

 

I can't get mad at someone whose heard tons about me wanting to know me more intimately. But if it was done during an affair I think I'm only going to remember the circumstances for a little bit longer than if it wasn't in an affair. KWIM?

 

When my dad was single, I don't think he ever brought a woman around me until he was talking marriage. But when he was married, I was treated like a "buying" perk. If they could impress me, he MIGHT leave my stepmom.

 

On the one hand, this question is more about the MM. But I do wonder about the woman that actually takes him up on it. Suppose I scored the winning shot that fateful day and it came up when the OW had a more permanent spot in my dad's life. Would she never bring it up? Or if she did, what would she say when I say "I didn't know you were there. Who were you with?".

 

Just doesn't seem worth the trouble, IMO.