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Affair partner physically thrashed my husband and had a physical fight with my sons

Infidelity In an affair or suspect your significant other? Share your experiences and concerns here.

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Old 25th January 2018, 12:28 PM   #61
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Originally Posted by sophisticatedlady View Post
Finally i met my family and yesterday i was in the hospital to see and meet my husband and kids,

it was so horrible and one of the worst time i ever had with my family members,

name calling and so many things heard from my kids,parents and inlaws.

when i was in the hospital, i dont know after few hours, cops came to the hospital and started questioning me, then we went to the Boston Police Department office and they have questioned me like i was a criminal or a bad women,they gave me the warning ,not to leave the city for few weeks.

then they questioned about my affair partner and they aksed the details, and wherabout of my affair partner.

and they caught my affair partner from the office,and boston police department have pressed certain charges,which i heard from my office colleagues.

everyone is asking so many questions,about injuries to my husband,there is a podium and stairs like strutcture on the entrance of my bedroom and there is a base ball and other sports equipment in the cupboard near to the podium and stair like structure,

affair partner used that baseball to hit on my husband and husband fell on that particular structure.i was hesitant to speak about these things,

things are so blur and messy, i am worried,how things will be with my family and other friends, what will happen, may be i will get fired from the organization.
What is the extent of your BH's injuries?
Has he been able to speak?
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Old 25th January 2018, 1:02 PM   #62
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You deserted your husband after he suffered an attack by your boyfriend with a baseball bat? You chose to runaway with the man that beat him unconscious not even making sure he was able to get medical treatment? You did nothing to protect him from injury, your children had to come to his rescue. You allowed them to be hurt, your young daughter is more of an adult then you are. Just so you know, a baseball bat is considered a weapon. By deserting your family after such a brutal attack with the attacker you are now an accomplice. They are trying to assess the level of your involvement to see if the charges should be levied equally against you and your boyfriend. You stayed with your family's assailant for several days after their attack, that makes you guilty.

You very likely will be fired, the insurance company will be coming after you for medical expenses because your husband will probably be in a wheelchair for a while. He may be unable to work as he did so very likely he will have to take a medical leave, all these costs will be your boyfriends and your responsibility to compensate the insurance company. There is a good chance you will do jail time on top of that, running away and hiding with your family's assailant makes you a party to it. Your life is about to get really, really ugly. Your probably going to cause severe financial consequences to your family, your father and mother included. []


Last edited by Moderator; 25th January 2018 at 1:17 PM.. Reason: Topical content
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Old 25th January 2018, 1:26 PM   #63 Moderator Moderator
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Originally Posted by William View Post
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Old 25th January 2018, 1:42 PM   #64
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Originally Posted by sophisticatedlady View Post
Thanks for the suggestions and advice, I know what I have done thatís wrong, I know what I have done thatís awful and I deserve the hate, but I want to do something at least for my husband and kids,
If my husband and kids decide to forgive me, I will do my best to heal them and I know right now everyone is angry and upset with me, and I admit that my deeds were disgusting and shameful,
You go from this
My affair partner is fine, on the incident day , after we reached the hotel, we went to the hospital, affair partner got some bruises and injuries on the face, head and on his genitals, and got the treatment.
to this. And all it leaves me wondering is, are you actually being serious here? WHO THE HELL CARES ABOUT THIS GUY! You most certain shouldn't for crying out loud. Not only does it put what you said right above it to the lie, it makes me think your family is possibly underreacting!

Your family caught you with the AP, the AP then physically assaulted your husband out of nowhere. He took him completely by surprise and thrashed them. You said at some other point you "would have intervened" but you didn't. He broke several bones before your sons jumped on him. Bot of whom got injured in the fight and your reaction was
I never saw that my sons can do such things
You mean physically defend their father whom a strange man you brought into your house was possibly beating to death at that time? Yes, that's absolutely horrible! Thank you for telling us that after he broke several bones in your husbands body and injured both your sons and daughter he was fine and you went to the hospital with him. After you fled from your home with him to a hotel, being more worried about him than your family.

what going on,and what will happen to my family and our relationship.
What's going on is that your behaviour throughout this entire situation was abysmal and your relationship will be non existent if they have any lick of sense. That guy ASSAULTED your husband, broke several bones and would have possibly beaten him to death. He then injured both of YOUR SONS and YOUR DAUGHTER and you fled with him from the scene and took him to the hospital. You not only had an affair, you sided with a man who physically assaulted your family and children in a brutal manner and exclaimed surprise and dismay at your sons intervening/fighting back.
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Old 25th January 2018, 2:17 PM   #65
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What's best for your husband and kids is up to them to decide. Most likely, it will be divorce. Don't fight him over the terms. And get yourself into therapy to figure out why a random dude matters more than your family.
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Old 25th January 2018, 2:17 PM   #66
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affair partner used that baseball to hit on my husband and husband fell on that particular structure.i was hesitant to speak about these things,
Just as I thought ^^^ more to this than meets the eye.....

Do you finally realise that your AP is a violent thug with an anger management issue?

And you stood by while he knocked 7 bells of $h!£ out of your husband, the father of your children?

And have you taken the advice given to keep away from him and get legal advice about all this?

And after you have taken some legal advice, please get some therapy - your moral compass is so boxed that it's spinning on its davits.

Last edited by Arieswoman; 25th January 2018 at 2:20 PM..
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Old 25th January 2018, 2:29 PM   #67
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And where was your affair partner's wife in all this? Has she already filed a missing person report, since he went into hiding in the hotel?
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Old 25th January 2018, 3:06 PM   #68
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Something is seriously disturbing about your reaction to the responses you've been given. It seems to me like you're not listening. Are you just trolling with this thread? I don't know anyone in your position who does **** like this, comes to this site and completely ignores EXTREMELY IMPORTANT advice from Loveshack members.

Your AP ASSAULTED your husband and YOUR CHILDREN. How in the hell can you be so delusional as to expect your family to welcome you after not only putting your husband, but YOUR EFFING KIDS in danger! You need to understand that they see you as both a horrible wife and mother. They want nothing to do with you. You've scarred your children for the rest of their lives. My heart breaks so much for your "family", because you certainly can't grasp the level of damage you have done.

You're going to be looking back 10 years from now, and regret every bad decision that you've made that put your children at risk of grievous harm. By then they will still resent you, maybe want to forgive you for their sakes, but still want nothing to do with you. You will grow old knowing that you ruined your own family and you chose your deadbeat AP over them. Your A is a fantasy, nothing more. Once that fantasy dissipates and you're left with so many people hating your guts, you'll have no one to blame for choices but yourself. The sad thing is by the time you come to terms with it all, it will be too late.
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Old 25th January 2018, 3:12 PM   #69
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My only advice is to divorce your H and give him EVERYTHING.

Any chance you had to fix things with your family disappeared when you did the same with your AP and hid out in a hotel with him.

In time, a very long time, you may repair your relationships with your children, but there's also a possibility that that never happens. I say this from experience as my XWW lied to her AP to in order to get him to instigate a fight with me. To this day, some 14 years later, her relationships with our 2 daughters (that she also abandoned to be with the AP) is still strained.

Your answers to the questions posed to you on this thread show that you could pretty much care less about the well being of your family. Leave them alone, and let time attempt to heal things. And in that time, you'll probably become truly remorseful eventually. At least, I hope so.

Last edited by GoldenR; 25th January 2018 at 3:16 PM..
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Old 25th January 2018, 3:17 PM   #70
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Is English your first language? I need to know you understand the seriousness of your situation because we now know a weapon was used in the attack on your family. Your choice to leave your family with the other man/attacker puts you in a very bad place. You need to get a lawyer that has experience with weapons charges. This is not just about infidelity, this is about you possibly being charged with a very serious crime. This could change your ability to be bonded, your credit, your financial situation, type of job you can hold, your marriage and there is a chance you may be incarcerated.

Even if your family doesn't press charges, the fact that a weapon was used makes it a police matter. This is a felony. No matter what my personal views of your behavior are, you need to be advised to get legal help. You also need to get independent counselling to find out why you behaved the way you did. There may be a physiological condition that your not aware of that is causing you to act the way you are.
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Old 25th January 2018, 3:50 PM   #71
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Please do not say you love your husband. Your actions show clearly the opposite.

Your lover almost kills your husband and fight with your children
because you had to screw him in your home and afterwards you go off with your lover.

Your actions have shown for the past two years how you had no problem humiliating, disrespecting and putting your husband at risk for STD's.

How would you feel if your husband brought his lover to your home to screw in your bed?

What happened to you to allow you to act in such a despicable manner toward your husband and your family?
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Old 25th January 2018, 3:50 PM   #72
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Originally Posted by sophisticatedlady View Post
My husband along with sons and daughter came with food and gifts in the afternoon to surprise me as my husband got promoted this January.

My husband leg and hand are fractured and he is seriously injured, and currently hospitalised.
Now your husband can't work because of your affair. I hope he doesn't lose his promotion.
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Old 25th January 2018, 5:25 PM   #73
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Sophisticatedlady. I donít see you identifying with your husband as your husband. All your loyalty and allegiance appears to be with your affair partner and you seem to identify with him as your husband. Your marital partner is your husband in name only, the guy who has been supporting you (I know you work as well), like a father would, but not a husband. After a two year affair with the AP you have completely detached from your husband and your children and your AP is now your pseudo-husband. I imagine prior to this event that all of your thoughts about the future revolved around the AP and not your family. Clearly you left the marriage and family some time ago as your actions show that they have no real value to you.
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Old 25th January 2018, 5:27 PM   #74
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MY husband is better, he will be able to walk and move after 1 month.

and kids are doing well,they are going to school,as usual,

the reason , i am writing here is ,today i got the termination letter because of affair with colleague and suspicion on helping my affairpartner on that day incident and staying in a hotel,

cops have informed my organization,about those incidents.

my mind is tossed up now,i will be going to my home to collect my clothes,some valuables, and other necessary items,

I will be staying in the rented house, for that i have to finalise the house.

till, how long, i dont know, but i have to start applying for jobs and as far as lawyer is concerned, i have an appoitment with one of the lawyer for tomorrow,

My kds have unfriended and blocked me from instagram,facebook,snapchat,pinterest,quora,whatsa pp.

i dont know, how i am going to cope up with this situation.

the way my family is treating me,i feel like a loser and pathetic person.
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Old 25th January 2018, 5:41 PM   #75
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Originally Posted by sophisticatedlady View Post
My kds have unfriended and blocked me from instagram,facebook,snapchat,pinterest,quora,whatsapp.
You communicate with your children via Quora??? Sorry, of everything in this heinous story, that's maybe the weirdest part so far.

What is going on with your affair partner? How has he escaped arrest? Surely the local authorities have to press charges?
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