I don't know if they have been other threads on this issue but I wanted to start one.
I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooo SICK TO DEATH of reading and hearing about "fat bashing" it is a form of emotional abuse when kids are picked on in school for being overweight. It pisses me off to no end when I see people staring, smurking, or pointing, or laughing at an obese person!
I want to beat the $hit out of them sometimes....Just because it isn't done to me doesn't mean that it doesn't affect me...pulls at my heart strings anyway.
Why do people think it's okay to be mean to someone just because they weigh more than you? If someone has medical issues or hell even if they just eat too much and excercise too little why is that an "okay acceptable" reason to be mean to them, belittle them, or just not want to have anything to do with them?
Who (other than tv) says and knows there is something WRONG with LOOKING different?
I would prefer someone with meat on their bones next to someone who looks like they are dying from an illness...who would want to hug a bag of bones..I'd be afraid I'd break one of them!
But on a more serious note.....it is WRONG to "look down" on someone just because they weigh more than you and I would like to hear some legitimate reasons why someone thinks it's okay to discriminate against the obese. Please don't give me the whole "it's unhealthy" arguement because NOT EVERY obese person has bad health...some have NO CO-Morbities what-so-ever! Save the "health" part of it and just tell me why you think it's okay to be mean cuz they look different. (and that's only extra meat not deformities or anything)
Give me your opinion on this what do you think?
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Hi Barby! I have a feeling you were inspired to write this post by something we both posted in earlier.
None the less I agree with you that it is wrong to bash overweight people and I also think it's really wrong for kids to be picked on and taught that it's ok to pick on people for any reason. I'm not even slightly obese or thick or anything but it annoys me when people poke at other people's physical flaws as if they have none of their own!
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Ando amando el amor de mi vida!
Thanks yeah I guess I was inspired to post this because of an earlier post but honestly I am just more interested in seeing what people think about this issue. I'm looking forward to reading more responses even if it isn't to agree with me.
well I'm with you in that people should be kind to each other
and make an attempt to put themselves in other's shoes.
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because NOT EVERY obese person has bad health
Are you aware that obese is the number one killer - ranked well above smoking.
This is not just a minor health risk - and minor lifestyle choice.
But, lack of health is certainly no justification for picking on someone
- in fact, its probably reason to have more compassion for them if anything.
Everyone is different though, and like every-other category or group in society
there are those in the fat group that ask for it.
I took an eleven hour flight to Europe - coach = narrow seating,
And next to me was someone twice two big for their spot.
Not only was I NOT comfortable - but 1/3 of my space was
being consumed by the overhang! My back was killing,
I couldn't sleep, relax, have comfort.
Plus - I'm not exactly thrilled about having
a strangers body = regardless of their weight,
squished against me in contact for hours.
Its a free country and we all should be good to each-other.
but if a person is going to make choices that make them
require a unique amount of resources - it is only kind of them to make sure that
their living doesn't overflow into to equal enjoyment
and opportunity for happiness that others deserve too through life.
So,
in the case of someone that is overweight,
god bless him or her,
and because of the compassion that I am sure they
expect to be shown towards them,
hopefully they will design travel strategies
without carelessly doing what's best for them
while feeling entitled to a chunk of someone
else's share.!
No, but it happens ALL the time. Job discrimination, social discrimination, people even divorce because one partner has gained a lot of weight.
I don't think the health risks matter at all. What difference does it make? A gay man has a higher risk for Aids, a smoker has a higher risk for certain cancers, a black person is at a higher risk for some diseases, and on and on ad nauseum.
Fat people just happen to be the target now. People honestly believe the stereotype of big dumb and stupid. Wasn't that a song? Society treats fat or obese people like they simply are not smart enough to be thin or fall within societies acceptable range. Over 35 and had children? Oh, well then it's okay to be heavier--to a point. Under 35 and no kids--Absolutly NOT! Society will accept weights based on age and background too.
Ever look at the clothing stores for fat women? 90% (my best guess, based on shopping with an obese friend.) is casual clothes. Try finding an executive business suit in a size 28. Next to impossible because we all know, an obese woman would never be smart enough to be an executive, or even an executive secretary.
Fat people don't cry themselves to sleep at night because no one loves them, or touches them, or wants to have sex with them--fat people don't have the same feelings or desires. They certainly can't have an orgasm! If they want company -- get a dog, a dog will love them even if they are fat. yes, this is sarcasm.
I read something somewhere about [color=blue]Plastic people succeed. Real people don't. [/color] I wish I could find the article.
I don't see this changing anytime soon. Especially not with jokes about cheesy thighs, and attitudes that it couldn't be real for an average weight man to actually want to have sex with an obese woman.
couldn't be real for an average weight man to actually want to have sex with an obese woman.
HokeyReligions,
Sounds good. And I bet you are scowering every weight-watchers clinic and "clothing stores for fat"
so you can find an obese man that can hardly walk let alone enjoy activities with you- - because
why wouldn't you - if its no matter to you either way - might as well be above it and contribute to
their dating pool. Most of all, I bet that you are so above such details like weight,
that you wouldn't mind, and probably wouldn't even notice the difference - when
you are with this 350 lb man you found - missionary - in bed exploring passions limits.
I don't know why god made us all so diverse,
I think its great because it makes life interesting,
but human beings are very clearly not made to
be equal - at the same types of things at least,
and it is reality - not cruelty - that makes
the matching up of "an average weight man ... with an obese woman"
uncommon if not uncomfortable.
Quote:
I don't think the health risks matter at all. What difference does it make? A gay man has a higher risk for Aids, a smoker has a higher risk for certain cancers,
Yes exactly! Smoking infects others through second hand. And I'm not going to touch the
Aids argument - but like the smoking - it is pretty obvious how these as well as over-eating
etc. can inter-fear with others.
Last edited by havNfun; 18th August 2004 at 7:19 PM.
tell me why you think it's okay to be mean cuz they look different. (and that's only extra meat not deformities or anything)
Are you saying it's acceptable to make fun of an obese person that is also deformed? Or just plain deformed? I hope I'm just misunderstanding.
Quote:
But, lack of health is certainly no justification for picking on someone
- in fact, its probably reason to have more compassion for them if anything.
To stretch this a little: Barby (and all others offended), how would you feel to know that a thin person felt sorry for an obese individual? Is this also unkind, since in their opinion there is something wrong with the person?
I'm probably going to get bashed after saying this, but I find that is usually my reaction in public when I see an obese man/woman. I feel sorry for them. Just like I feel sorry for those with physical/mental disabilities.
I don't think I'm better than they are, but I just don't see how they could be happy carrying around so much extra weight, dealing with the abuse, not being able to find the clothes they would like to wear, and more often than not, dealing with weight-related health issues.
Another thing - I have noticed that many of the, we'll say, "happily obese" make just as much fun of the thin men/women out there.
Quote:
I would prefer someone with meat on their bones next to someone who looks like they are dying from an illness...who would want to hug a bag of bones..I'd be afraid I'd break one of them!
Sadly this is okay. But "I would prefer someone with a slim figure next to someone with cellulite specked thighs and all those wrinkles and folds of fat. I'm afraid I might get lost in all that fat!" is not.
I think people who make fun of people with issues beyond their control are insecure in their own way. They make fun of people because it makes them feel better and they are doing it in an immature way.
I almost feel sorry for them because they have no other way to make them feel better (as it seems), just like in school for example, kids make fun of kids with lower income house holds. I went to a school in Phoenix and I was made fun of by the snobby girls because my family shopped at Walmart.
It hurt, and I hurt when I see someone made fun of for something they cannot do much or anything about.
This world is going to s*&t
I just hope that I can teach my daughter that real beauty is inside a person, and how they treat others.
couldn't be real for an average weight man to actually want to have sex with an obese woman.
She wasn't bashing average weight men, she was referring to another post where some people thought it was a joke because an average weight man said he wanted to be with an obese woman.
Quote:
Sadly this is okay. But "I would prefer someone with a slim figure next to someone with cellulite specked thighs and all those wrinkles and folds of fat. I'm afraid I might get lost in all that fat!" is not.
Deranged, I see your point. I don't think anyone should be cruel to someone else no matter what their size is.
Deranged, I see your point. I don't think anyone should be cruel to someone else no matter what their size is.
Agreed. Size bashing in general is quite hurtful. Coming from a thin girl.
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Fat people just happen to be the target now. People honestly believe the stereotype of big dumb and stupid.
If thin people believe that fat people are big, dumb, and stupid, then fat people certainly believe that thin people are obsessed with their looks and desperate to remain thin.
Of course it's cruel to be cruel. I can't think of any valid excuse no matter what the reason.
But... people view it as something totally controllable. Because... technically it IS. Millions of people struggle with their weight, diet, stay active, etc. It's more of a mental health issue than anything - and the baggage from ineffectively dealing with it is there for the world to see. Nobody needs to hear cruel comments from people - they hear them enough from their own inner critic. I have several overweight friends, however, who renewed their interest in dieting after overhearing cruel remarks. Not that anyone should take it upon themselves to let everyone in the world know exactly what their problems are.. but it's a fact of life that that is what happens. Everyone is a critic. Whether it's "wow, look at her hanging over the top of her pants that's disgusting." or "oh my god, i can't believe she's wearing those shoes!"
Sure, no one has to be perfectly fit-looking to have a healthy body. Although studies keep coming out that pretty much prove what probably seems obvious - that a life is probably longest if less food of greater nutritional content is consumed throughout. A person is healthiest if they strive to keep their body healthy. Hey, if you have extra pounds, who really cares. But too overweight or too skinny is a health problem and a social problem and a person who is otherwise healthy and has no other medical problem preventing action, makes no attempt to reach a more healthy weight is basically ostracizing themself from society. Unless they are still fit enough to enjoy activities like hiking, horse back riding, swimming, dress for a formal event or a nightclub, and other things without feeling bad about their appearance, then they subconsciously use their weight as a method of avoidance. It's a horrible perpetual cycle.
My point is not to lecture about obesity (sorry) but just to say that discrimination for something like racism or sexism is prevalent enough in the world - both uncontrollable factors. The same type of close-mindedness only GREATER is what you see affecting obese people right now. How many people diet regularly and work out hard to get pounds off - especially recently with all the diet crazes. They think "I did it!" or "My mother did it!" or "That's not a problem for me." and then they think, "Why can't he?" or "Why is that person so fat? The slob." Medical conditions only account for 1% of cases of obesity.
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Last edited by LoveShack.org Moderator; 18th August 2004 at 11:20 PM.
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What did SHE just say (and she said it out loud)?!?
Love is an easy word to say.
Make him prove it with his actions.
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