Fiance is making me even more negative towards women

[Craig]

I would never abuse or mistreat a daughter ever. I am just honest with myself about the society we live in.

Hah! Catch it! You are setting the stage for it to happen with your attitude and beliefs.

 

Just how would you raise a daughter or son to live in the world as you think you see it?

[lindya]

With all due respect, intentions are one thing, and action is another.

 

Don't they (whoever "they" are) always say that the road to hell is littered with good intentions? Or as I like to say, don't ask for the applause until you've performed the show.

[Buttaflyy]

I don't doubt that you feel that way but it seems like whenever there is a woman in the news that harms a man she becomes a hero. I remember how Lorena Bobbit became a folk hero for mutilating a man. This woman commited a brutal crime and she becomes a feminist hero.

 

Ok. Well, she is ONE woman. And a crazy one at that. She is similar to you in the since that she was abused by men and developed a hatred for them (or at least one who also happened to be her abuser) her hatred caused her to castrate him. Your hatred can effect you to act negatively as well. This is what is so alarming to me. You don't even realize how negative you might affect a female. If you had a daughter, believe it or not, she'd be affected!

 

For your sake, please...who is a positive woman (besides your SO) that you admire? Not someone insane please!

[Woggle]

I would raise both of them to be strong and be prepared for this world. Truthfully most men are not much better. I saw my best friend get shot in the face because the killer could not accept losing a bar brawl. The guy who killed him was a man so this world is filled with rotten people. This is a relationship board so of course I am focused more in women because I give the male perspective on relationships.

[a4a]

Hah! Catch it! You are setting the stage for it to happen with your attitude and beliefs.

 

Just how would you raise a daughter or son to live in the world as you think you see it?

 

 

Like the recent thread about the nephew and Woggle telling him how women are?

 

YIKES!!!

 

Seriously Woggle...... get therapy or at least a vasectomy.

You cannot break the cycle until you face it first.

[Craig]

If you have shown compassion towards my remarks don't apply to you but I am just saying what I feel. Many men feel this way but are afraid to say it and I truly do feel women enjoy when a man suffers.

 

Then you must be receiving dozens of PMs confirming this right?

[Woggle]

Ok. Well, she is ONE woman. And a crazy one at that. She is similar to you in the since that she was abused by men and developed a hatred for them (or at least one who also happened to be her abuser) her hatred caused her to castrate him. Your hatred can effect you to act negatively as well. This is what is so alarming to me. You don't even realize how negative you might affect a female. If you had a daughter, believe it or not, she'd be affected!

 

For your sake, please...who is a positive woman (besides your SO) that you admire? Not someone insane please!

 

And many women admired her although if he really did beat and rape her he deserved it. I have no sympathy for abusers no matter what gender they are.

 

I have a friend at work who is a woman and we get along very well. I even pulled some strings to get her a promotion. I also like the female judge that gave me everything in the divorce after she found out my ex was lying about the abuse and rape. I guess there are more good women than it seems somtimes.

[Buttaflyy]

I would raise both of them to be strong and be prepared for this world. Truthfully most men are not much better. I saw my best friend get shot in the face because the killer could not accept losing a bar brawl. The guy who killed him was a man so this world is filled with rotten people. This is a relationship board so of course I am focused more in women because I give the male perspective on relationships.

 

This is very sad. I'm sorry to hear that. Yes, this world can be a cruel place. But, how is it that everyone else seems to go along without having these feelings that you do? You read these posts here don't you. Everyone has a story, albeit a different one, it's what you do to overcome your miseries that matters. You have to realize that you must overcome your childhood abuse. You are harboring these feelings and passing them on. You have to find a way to let them go, or deal with them.

[Buttaflyy]

And many women admired her although if he really did beat and rape her he deserved it. I have no sympathy for abusers no matter what gender they are.

 

I have a friend at work who is a woman and we get along very well. I even pulled some strings to get her a promotion. I also like the female judge that gave me everything in the divorce after she found out my ex was lying about the abuse and rape. I guess there are more good women than it seems somtimes.

 

And it seems you were deserving of this. It's not every woman who thinks you aren't. It's probably not even MOST as you say. It's the scumbag wench who lied about abuse and rape that you have every right to be angry with. She's one of the rotten ones. Rotten to the core IMO, to be able to do something such as that. Any woman who abuses their kids as well. But in no way could I generalize everyone. You have to see things clearly, for what they are.

 

You sound as though you are a nice enough guy Woggle. You sound as if you want to make your SO as happy as she's made you. But do you realize that you must help yourself in order to be a good husband to her?

[crazy_grl]

I think whoever raised the thought of what you'd do when you had a daughter made a very good point. Woggle, you said that it raised the bile in your throat to hear your mother and those other women talking about men. Think of how your daughter would feel to listen to all these things you say about women. And if her mother confirmed these things? You only had one parent talking about how horrible men are. She would have both parents telling her how aweful women are, and therefore she is.

 

Would you really want to hurt your daughter that way?

[Fun2BMe]

She has a lot of money but she went out there and earned it and she signed the prenup because in this day and age when women earn their own money they should not be able to leech off a man. That mentality is so refreshing coming from a woman. Many women would call her a doormat or stepford woman but she has two degrees and has earned more money on her own than most of them could dream of.

 

If she has a lot of money and signed a prenup, why do you think that is so generous of her? Obviously she's protecting herself from you ever getting your hands on her money! What a great catch you've got there.

[amaysngrace]

I remember how Lorena Bobbit became a folk hero for mutilating a man. This woman commited a brutal crime and she becomes a feminist hero.

 

Dear Woggle...

 

Lorena Bobbit married a monster, not a man. In turn, she became a monster.

 

You weren't raised by a woman. You were raised by a monster. How long are you going to live without addressing the issue? That you are, in some way, a monster as well. Of course it's a totally different scenario, with Lorena being a grown woman with other options and yours being a child without any. But you brought her up.

 

But honestly, I am more accepting of you than I am of her. She could have opted for divorce without resorting to violence. She didn't. So she is evil in my eyes. That as well as dumb.

 

How you were treated by your monster mother is not your fault, nor was it ever. You were a child. And she behaved like a monster.

 

If you choose to let her and all of the evil she inflicted upon you to fester, well that, my friend, IS your fault.

 

Please seek to help yourself. Be it through therapy or through coming to terms with what she has done to you on your own, please do it. You are worthy of a good outlook on life.

 

You are worthy of inner-peace. And you are worthy of love.

 

Unfortunately the first person who should have provided love to you was a monster.

 

And sadly, she is continuing to abuse you even today. By you allowing her to. If you allow what she has done to you change you forever in a negative way, then she is winning.

 

She is winning the battle by preventing you from having emotional well-being. She is getting the best of you. The best of you should be reserved for you right now.

 

Please stop giving this part of yourself away to a monster.

 

She's not worth it...but YOU are!