alcohol and cocaine addiction

[chocolate_boy]

Hi guys, I'm not proud of this at all, but I'm here in the morning after another all-nighter on drink and drugs, and down to my last $30 in the world, I have given my dealer over $1200 this month, I know its stupid and its way too much, today this has hit me and I know its gone out of control, so I'm off everything from now on, I am giving up drugs for good and alcohol til december (6months completely sober),

 

Can any one give me some encouraging words or advice at this point? I don't think I need professional help and can deal witht his myself, just some helpful words or other people's stories really help me here.

 

Yeah I started all this last year cos of a chick.. sheesh!

[Fun2BMe]

I remember reading about the situation with your ex a while back. I don't know how I lost track because I had no idea you started to abuse drugs and alcohol. I am sad to hear that. Are you ready to quit cold turkey? I think that will be the best thng to do I take it you did not get back together with the ex? She's not worth destroying your life over.

[chocolate_boy]

I remember reading about the situation with your ex a while back. I don't know how I lost track because I had no idea you started to abuse drugs and alcohol. I am sad to hear that. Are you ready to quit cold turkey? I think that will be the best thng to do I take it you did not get back together with the ex? She's not worth destroying your life over.

 

No I didn't really announce it on the board, I am well over my ex now, but just got mixed up with the wrong crowd. It easily spirals out of control, seeing my bank balance in ruins and recently I've got a bit of a reputation which is not good, I am ready to quit 100% from today, even alcohol I am aiming for 6 months without a drink and off the drugs for good, I am not looking well now, I'm very pale and have not been eating well.

 

I want to live healthy, I get paid well so at the end of the month I will be ok, I want to avoid touching my savings, so I'm actually gonna walk to work and back for the next week or so (about 2 miles) which will be healthy, and eat well and sleep lots.

 

You are very right, this isn't about my ex anymore though, it started over that, but just became my lifestyle, its the people I hang out with, sadly I need to cut my friends off for a while.

[littlekitty]

If it's honestly an addicition you may be better off seeking professional help.

 

One piece of advice I can give you is that you won't manage this if you don't change your social scene. I can only presume you are doing this socially, and therefore your friends are doing it too. If you continue to hang out with the same people, you'll not stand a chance.

 

I stopped all class A drugs many years ago now. I lost several good close friends. Why? Because they always wanted to be 'on' something and weren't interested in seeing me straight. I wasn't interested in spending time with them when they were 'on' something because we were on totally different wave lengths and I didn't find them as interesting as I did when I was off my head too!

 

$1200 is a lot of money. More than some people probably earn in a month. You need to sort this out before you do something you really regret.

[Fun2BMe]

It sounds like you are really ready to change things around for the good. It might take a couple of months for all the drugs to leave your body at which time you can think clearly and be happy you are no longer with the same crowd that has been a bad influence. Exercise will help speed the recovery. Walk to work, don't drink or do drugs and stay away from the bad friends and the ATM machine! Start right now because the longer you wait, the harder it will be to change what will become your lifestyle.

[chocolate_boy]

If it's honestly an addicition you may be better off seeking professional help.

 

One piece of advice I can give you is that you won't manage this if you don't change your social scene. I can only presume you are doing this socially, and therefore your friends are doing it too. If you continue to hang out with the same people, you'll not stand a chance.

 

I stopped all class A drugs many years ago now. I lost several good close friends. Why? Because they always wanted to be 'on' something and weren't interested in seeing me straight. I wasn't interested in spending time with them when they were 'on' something because we were on totally different wave lengths and I didn't find them as interesting as I did when I was off my head too!

 

$1200 is a lot of money. More than some people probably earn in a month. You need to sort this out before you do something you really regret.

 

Yeah that is very true, I don't think I'm hooked as such as i never crave cocaine when I'm not drinking and I only drink when I'm out with the boys, which has been pretty much every night recently, and it is far too much money. They do look after me and I look after my friends, a few of us have been in this situation and I have let some stay with me when they can't afford rent or food, sad I know. We work in the media industry so coke is rife, as much as I love my friends you are right I need to cut them off, its nothing personal but for a while i need to look after me, so that means a life of staying in everynight and sleeping early, gonna throw myself properly into work for a while.

 

I can stop if I do that I'm sure.

x

[chocolate_boy]

It sounds like you are really ready to change things around for the good. It might take a couple of months for all the drugs to leave your body at which time you can think clearly and be happy you are no longer with the same crowd that has been a bad influence. Exercise will help speed the recovery. Walk to work, don't drink or do drugs and stay away from the bad friends and the ATM machine! Start right now because the longer you wait, the harder it will be to change what will become your lifestyle.

 

That is top advice and I will follow it to the letter. I am a very strong person, and have a strong personality, so I can do this and just vanish from my social scene, which is causing all the probs. Fact is I'm quite happy alone and staying in of an evening, I'll just buy DVDs and computer games with my coke money Seriously I'm ready to clean up, I know I need to.

[littlekitty]

Coke is more-ish... you always want more when you're on it! I used vast amounts at times, however, like you, I never felt addicted. It wasn't something I did every day, or even craved. But when the weekend swung around.... that was it.

 

I did find it relitively easy to stop, I did exactly what you're suggesting and I had no problems. Over the next year I probably did it again maybe twice, thinking hmmmm I used to enjoy it so much. But I disliked it both times, and haven't touched it since. That was many years ago now.

 

Just think... no more of those god damn awful come downs. Do it hon, chuck yourself in to YOUR life, and getting yourself healthy and happy again. And let us know how you get on!

[Fun2BMe]

You'll definitely enjoy the dvds and games more than the drugs and alcohol. That's good that you don't have a need to be around a group of people so you can handle being alone, at least for a while until you can clean yourself. I have a strong personality too when it comes to these things. Cut it out completely. It sounds like you've already began the process! Good job. If you have any alcohol at your place, go dump all of it in the sink and throw out the bottles and flush the drugs down the toilet.

[slinkysu]

Please do stop.

 

One of my close friends loved to abuse coke and alcohol and enjoyed 'getting messy'. That was until Christmas day 2005 when he took one line too many and had a stroke at the age of 28. He is still in hospital now and his life is forever changed. When we first saw him in ICU he had a 1% chance of living. The doctors confirmed it was the drugs and alcohol that did this to him.

 

Strokes from cocaine usage are more common than you think and mixing coke with alcohol raises your blood pressure to dangerous levels.

 

Like you, he earned good money and went out and 'entertained' with his colleagues from work, who all looked out for each other etc etc. He came from a solid famiy background, had a great job and owned his own home but liked to take drugs and alcohol and enjoyed them. He didn't see the harm as he wasn't harming anyone but himself. Or so he thought. Because we have all had to go through this with him, we've all been affected.

 

His whole family have now found out about his lifestyle, his usage, his debts - everything. They have been amazing to him, but the strain is evident for all to see.

 

you may need to seek professional help as $1200 a month (and we're only half way through the month) is more than 'just dabbling'.

 

I knew i had a drinking problem for years but it took a lot of failed attempts to give up on my own to admit i needed to be away from the problem and checked myself into rehab. That was 9 years ago and I haven't touched a drop since - so it is possible - but for me the solution was taking myself to a place where alcohol couldn't be bought and dealing with the issues behind my drinking. I have the utmost respect and admiration for people who can give up their addiction whilst still functioning in society as i couldn't deal with the temptation.

 

Don't be upset with yourself if you can't stick to the goals you have set. If you take a drink don't think 'that's it, i've blown it', just try and get back on track as soon as you can. Take it one day at a time and do go to an AA or NA meeting. You don't have to stand up and say anything if you don't want to - a lot of meetings are open meetings so you can attend whether you are an addict or not - but do go to hear other stories of people in similar situations - it really does help.

 

Good luck with it all.

 

Take care

[Ladywithafan]

that will definitely help.

 

As one who's done the crack cocaine/alcohol thing...at the end, everything's up in smoke & the disgust & dissapointment always hits home hard.

 

If you don't crave it; that's a plus. If you continue to hang around people that do it, you will cave in from time to time...just eliminate the situations.

[chocolate_boy]

Ok just a quick update for you, I'm doing well but its been tough, must have gotten about 10 sms and 5 phone calls every night for the last few nights off people trying to get me to come out. I've actually ignored my friends that do drugs right out (for now, I'll explain soon to them, but right now don't need the peer pressure), my other friends I've told them I'm tee-total, most of them have been understanding, and done the usual, "we're throwing a huge party, come over you can just drink orange juice", like that would happpen. I was hugely tempted for a beer tonight and actually got ready to go out.. then as I was about to leave the house, I changed my mind, turned my phone off and went back in. Since then I've drank 4 litres of water, had a salad and a huge watermelon.. mmnn.

 

So being in the house on my own at a weekend is odd, but I'm quite enjoying it. I know I'll be back on the alcohol socially again eventually, but thats fine and affordable, its the coke I need to kick, and for now the only way I can break the association between drinking and cocaine is by not doing either.

 

It doesn't even feel like the weekend. I am at work on Sun morning, but it will be nice to turn up without a hangover for the first time ever on a sun

[littlekitty]

Well done for getting through the first weekend!! Keep going!!

[Oh Lolly]

I think there are a lot more recreational e/coke/alcohol users out there than anyone would ever guess. I personally have a succesfull and demanding job in finance and I have the time of my life every weekend on all of the above.

 

I've been using almost every weekend for about 4 years now and can honestly say I've never been happier. I've spent well over $50,000 on drugs in that time and don't regret a cent of it. I work so hard during the week I just want to get crazy on the weekend. Every weekend I have the time of my life. I don't get come downs either, I guess I'm blessed.

 

Anyway, I guess this isn't very helpful to you because you've decided to quit. Good on you - I don't think I could do it, my entire lifestyle would collapse. Sometimes I envy those people who are happy enough to watch a few DVDs on the weekend and have a quiet beer. Because for us, we'll never be satisfied with that again.

[chocolate_boy]

Yeah I can definitlely relate to that Oh Lolly, the problem is when you end up going out everynight, I work in media (im a presenter) so i work short hours, usually only 5-6 hours a day with a midday start, so its easy to party everynight (as i have been). I have no problem with people doing drugs, infact the media and society pisses me off, I think drugs have and do a lot of positive things for people, look at all the great music and art that has been created due to drug use, it does open your mind and allow you to experience new areas of life.

 

My problem is more health & finance related, I've been feeling like s*** recently, sure coke is nice for a weekend treat, but when you're spending $200+ a day on coke and alcohol, its just pointless, and think of the other things you could buy.

 

I do get bad comedowns, i hate the after-coke effect of lying there at 7am with the sun coming up, unable to sleep, sweating and your heart pounding, its awful,that is enough to keep me off it for good just remembering how that feels.

 

Funnily enough after last wed when I decided to quit, the idea of coke no longer appeals to me, i do miss a beer but I'm not an alcoholic so I know I can go out and have a drink when I feel ready, its just the drugs I need to stop before it got out of hand completely.

 

I won't do coke again, I'm sure of that, , I used to do X when I was a kid, but after you take anything for a while you move on and get bored of it. I do still smoke a bit of weed and magic mushrooms for a laugh with buddies occasionally (maybe once every 6 months), but they're hardly class A addictive substances, its just keeping life controlled and not ruining yourself that matters.

[Oh Lolly]

C-B, you've got a good head on your shoulders. I think we're very similiar. I too am a big believer in the positive effects drugs can have on people's lives and it is irritating how they get misrepresented in the media. However I guess they're illegal for a reason.

 

As enlightening as they can be I guess everyone knows their limit and you've reached yours. I too hate that 7am seedy vibe. My trick is a shower and sleeping pills. Never fails. Then again, seeing my bank balance on the day after pay day when I've gone out, and knowing I've got to make $70 last for 2 weeks, is a bit of a downer too!!

 

I used to go out and have fun just on alcohol but now the association with coke and alcohol seems to be too strong for me. I can't even have a drink without getting depressed if I don't have any coke on me. I would love to lose that feeling, because lately I have even been turning down offers for a couple of drinks after work because I know it will lead to an all-night bender. I have also been out with my boyfriend for 2 months now and yet I've never seen him without being high (he has no idea). Another thing... I've had a constant runny nose for the past year and get a nose bleed at least once a week. Maybe my life right now isn't so charmed?

 

I guess I think everything's cool now but one day I'll probably be posting a similiar thread to yours. I just wish the fun didn't have to end.

[RecordProducer]

When I started drinking, I had the picture of me being a little girl seeing myself as the innocent girl that would never do anything bad... I hated to see myself in the mirror as someone breaking my image of what I thought was good.

 

May years later, I still have the same problem. i don't know where I lost my innocent girl. Actually I know: parents' divorce, sexual abuse by my step-father, physical abuse that he did to mom that I witnessed... it all made me the vulnerable person I am today. Do I regret drinking to numb myself? No. But I do regret losing my innocent girl.

 

Think of the innocent boy in yourself! Be a good boy and don't lose it. Once you lose it - it's so hard to find it.

 

You'll be proud of yourself once you say "no" to drugs and alcohol.

[Poconobob]

Hi guys, I'm not proud of this at all, but I'm here in the morning after another all-nighter on drink and drugs, and down to my last $30 in the world, I have given my dealer over $1200 this month, I know its stupid and its way too much, today this has hit me and I know its gone out of control, so I'm off everything from now on, I am giving up drugs for good and alcohol til december (6months completely sober),

 

Can any one give me some encouraging words or advice at this point? I don't think I need professional help and can deal witht his myself, just some helpful words or other people's stories really help me here.

 

Yeah I started all this last year cos of a chick.. sheesh!

 

 

Hey Chocolate boy, I'm not here to lecture you, only you know if you are using, only you can do something about it. Please though read on...

 

I lost a gf exactly one year ago tomorrow... We used recreationally, she was a major abuser before, I was a newbie. Our drugs of choice were crack and coke and booze. We'd buy really good coke and cook it... nuff said on that. It still makes me yearn a bit but not so much when I think of the utter damage and how it quickly destroyed my life. When I say I lost her, she died...Know how she knew she would die? The doctor told her that she was in liver failure from years of abuse. Aparently a coctail of booze and coke causes a RIPPING tear down of the liver. Anyway, she knew it was coming and didn't tell me it would be so fast. Long story short, she obtained some this night a year ago... Stayed up all night and somewhat into the day, that evening exhausted I took a cat nap.

 

Her liver gave out, she died in her sleep next to me while I too slept.

 

Now you may think I was some low life but actually I "was" a professional in a very professional industry, I made good money, had a 400K house, etc.

 

Fast forward ... I began the ritual like you described, in excess of 1200 a month. Depression, hurt, missing her, etc... It went from June to November and at the end of november last year I had 300 bucks to my name, the house sold off, most of my posessions sold including a free and clear truck, a tractor used ot plow snow, expensive oak cabinetry, HD televisionS... a surround sound, stainless steel sears kenmore ultra appliances, fixtures, ANYTHING... and here goes, 44,000 dollars over a period from when I first tried it Feb 05 to the end Nov 05.

 

I stopped by waking up, plunking a for sale sign in the dirt, loading up my car, and moving 6 states away, and not looking back.

 

Did I have help? NOPE... Did I have people to lean on? NOPE...

 

I pulled myself out of a tailspin and it wasn't easy. I have also since then stopped all drinking except a rare occasion when I have a glass of wine, I stopped smoking cigars which was another expensive habit, and I also quit my Xanax and Effexor which were psyc meds I was on for years which obviously did no good. I totally am clean as clean can be...

 

I want you to know, you CAN DO IT... the hardest part for me was the psychological need for it, no physical need other than when you take the hit and you know you have no more and wait 20 minutes to sober up enough and pray the dealer is awake at 4 am to go get more! Many a time I found myself driving to meet him at allhours...

 

I cringe thinking about it yet there is a problem with all that... There will still be cravings. I admit I still have 'em... Your brain will tell you when you have a slight problem or stress to use, that you can do just one. Or just take one hit or just rationalize.

 

When you rationalize, when you begin to think, completely stop what you are doing at the time and say out loud NO NO NO... say it out loud. Youi can do this. It works if you want it to.

 

My personal email is available through the profile, I recommend you contact someone, me if need be.

 

BTW, for those wondering, I'm about to buy a house I have a new car I have began a new career with a major home improvement warehouse company and just got promoted to a management position.

 

How do I stay focused, I don't, I faulter but I stop in my tracks and say to myself STOP NO... NO NO NO

 

I'm going to try to go to bed. I hope for your sake you went to bed.

 

bob

[Poconobob]

I think there are a lot more recreational e/coke/alcohol users out there than anyone would ever guess. I personally have a succesfull and demanding job in finance and I have the time of my life every weekend on all of the above.

 

I've been using almost every weekend for about 4 years now and can honestly say I've never been happier. I've spent well over $50,000 on drugs in that time and don't regret a cent of it. I work so hard during the week I just want to get crazy on the weekend. Every weekend I have the time of my life. I don't get come downs either, I guess I'm blessed.

 

Anyway, I guess this isn't very helpful to you because you've decided to quit. Good on you - I don't think I could do it, my entire lifestyle would collapse. Sometimes I envy those people who are happy enough to watch a few DVDs on the weekend and have a quiet beer. Because for us, we'll never be satisfied with that again.

 

 

I used to be able to occasionally party, smoke weed, do a line, but not every night like what happened. Something clicked, I still don't know exactly what it was but I can tell you that I recreationally did it. Someone said it was because I got average sh3t before and I must have gotten a really really really good batch and strived to catch the same high. IMO to a degree ya it was that way because I used to do identical methods, I worked VERY hard and sold all week and I defragmented on saturday into sunday. I was in finance and mgt so the stress was there but somehow I could handle the use of recreationally playing around until like I said something just snapped.

 

I'd like to think I could play again as all is in order once again. All I can say is THANK GOD, I lost my PIN number to my Platinum cards, omg, the damage I could have done. And thankfully there was a series of events which allowed me to lose my account numbers and I had savings and forgot I had the accounts. That was how lost I was.....

 

reality check, no I can't play, but I could tell you every new DVD release!

 

bob

[chocolate_boy]

Dude, thank you for posting, I feel your pain, that is an horrendously sad tale, and a real eye opener.

 

I hope you're coping ok. I had my first night out in a few weeks on Sat, just went to see my friend off, stood in a bar drinking orange juice... it was really wierd and I went home after a few hours, just felt out of place.

 

I haven't craved coke since though man, and your story just re-affirms the need to stay away from it.

 

God be with you bro.

[Fun2BMe]

Aparently a coctail of booze and coke causes a RIPPING tear down of the liver. Anyway, she knew it was coming and didn't tell me it would be so fast. Long story short, she obtained some this night a year ago... Stayed up all night and somewhat into the day, that evening exhausted I took a cat nap.

 

Her liver gave out, she died in her sleep next to me while I too slept.

Hey Bob, sorry to hear what you went through and especially for the loss of your gf. That sounds awful, but it is a good thing everything is going well for you now and you have a second chance at starting over.

 

As far as the booze and coke combo, that is a lethal combination. The alcohol acts as a sedative whereas coke is a stimulant. One sends messages to the heart to beat slower, the other to beat faster. The mixed signals causes the heart to go into shock and freeze.

[Ladywithafan]

Hey Chocolate boy, I'm not here to lecture you, only you know if you are using, only you can do something about it. Please though read on...

 

I lost a gf exactly one year ago tomorrow... We used recreationally, she was a major abuser before, I was a newbie. Our drugs of choice were crack and coke and booze. We'd buy really good coke and cook it... nuff said on that. It still makes me yearn a bit but not so much when I think of the utter damage and how it quickly destroyed my life. When I say I lost her, she died...Know how she knew she would die? The doctor told her that she was in liver failure from years of abuse. Aparently a coctail of booze and coke causes a RIPPING tear down of the liver. Anyway, she knew it was coming and didn't tell me it would be so fast. Long story short, she obtained some this night a year ago... Stayed up all night and somewhat into the day, that evening exhausted I took a cat nap.

 

Her liver gave out, she died in her sleep next to me while I too slept.

 

Now you may think I was some low life but actually I "was" a professional in a very professional industry, I made good money, had a 400K house, etc.

 

Fast forward ... I began the ritual like you described, in excess of 1200 a month. Depression, hurt, missing her, etc... It went from June to November and at the end of november last year I had 300 bucks to my name, the house sold off, most of my posessions sold including a free and clear truck, a tractor used ot plow snow, expensive oak cabinetry, HD televisionS... a surround sound, stainless steel sears kenmore ultra appliances, fixtures, ANYTHING... and here goes, 44,000 dollars over a period from when I first tried it Feb 05 to the end Nov 05.

 

I stopped by waking up, plunking a for sale sign in the dirt, loading up my car, and moving 6 states away, and not looking back.

 

Did I have help? NOPE... Did I have people to lean on? NOPE...

 

I pulled myself out of a tailspin and it wasn't easy. I have also since then stopped all drinking except a rare occasion when I have a glass of wine, I stopped smoking cigars which was another expensive habit, and I also quit my Xanax and Effexor which were psyc meds I was on for years which obviously did no good. I totally am clean as clean can be...

 

I want you to know, you CAN DO IT... the hardest part for me was the psychological need for it, no physical need other than when you take the hit and you know you have no more and wait 20 minutes to sober up enough and pray the dealer is awake at 4 am to go get more! Many a time I found myself driving to meet him at allhours...

 

I cringe thinking about it yet there is a problem with all that... There will still be cravings. I admit I still have 'em... Your brain will tell you when you have a slight problem or stress to use, that you can do just one. Or just take one hit or just rationalize.

 

When you rationalize, when you begin to think, completely stop what you are doing at the time and say out loud NO NO NO... say it out loud. Youi can do this. It works if you want it to.

 

My personal email is available through the profile, I recommend you contact someone, me if need be.

 

BTW, for those wondering, I'm about to buy a house I have a new car I have began a new career with a major home improvement warehouse company and just got promoted to a management position.

 

How do I stay focused, I don't, I faulter but I stop in my tracks and say to myself STOP NO... NO NO NO

 

I'm going to try to go to bed. I hope for your sake you went to bed.

 

bob

 

I went through even more $ in a year & a half and it was my bf who was spending that cash for rocks as fast as you could punch in an ATM #

 

My mistake was letting it happen...

 

I hate crack...it almost ruined me...so sorry to hear the gf story...that could be my bf...

 

That's why I don't like to play with the devil anymore...

 

I've got tons of financial problems because of this game, but...

 

I do have a job I've been at almost two years in November, a nice apartment, a paid off vehicle even in the midst of bankruptcy & case getting closed, hopefully this year...I wish I could give people the drug timeline of what will happen......

[Poconobob]

I went through even more $ in a year & a half and it was my bf who was spending that cash for rocks as fast as you could punch in an ATM #

 

My mistake was letting it happen...

 

I hate crack...it almost ruined me...so sorry to hear the gf story...that could be my bf...

 

That's why I don't like to play with the devil anymore...

 

I've got tons of financial problems because of this game, but...

 

I do have a job I've been at almost two years in November, a nice apartment, a paid off vehicle even in the midst of bankruptcy & case getting closed, hopefully this year...I wish I could give people the drug timeline of what will happen......

 

 

 

 

I think it takes true HATE to never use again and also a strong mind that doesn't get romantic at the idea of the "rush".

 

I was around some people who were using and it had me running in circles in my mind. My mind was actually trying tell me I could handle it that all would be okay that I could afford it.

 

The crystal ball on drug timeline, I guess it depends on just how far you'll let yourself go or sink until you hit bottom. "Our"... i.e. yours and mine brought us to the brink of disaster yet somehow our luck and I might add, some obviously well off relatives to help out saved what little there was in salvation.

 

bob

[Ladywithafan]

...I know what it was like when it was really good...I know what it's like when it's bad as well...

 

I hate bad dope. I pretty much hate what happened to me because of all the dope...so, I'd rather say, no...I know what happens when I get high...it's just no fun and I'm not trying to escape from the real world either...I just got caught up in something I didn't understand until it was way too late...

 

You play with fire you get burned. I just about burned down the house...in a manner of speaking.

 

I watched some friends this weekend get high...sat right next to them and just said, "NO." One of them was fine afterward & just kept talking & walking around...the other one started to get that paranoid aura going on but actually didn't quite get there. I saw a lot of restraint/resistance to that feeling...and for me...I just sat back and had a SPARKS and decided that saying no was good. I just didn't want to feel that "high" again...and happy that I didn't do a hit.

[Poconobob]

...I know what it was like when it was really good...I know what it's like when it's bad as well...

 

I hate bad dope. I pretty much hate what happened to me because of all the dope...so, I'd rather say, no...I know what happens when I get high...it's just no fun and I'm not trying to escape from the real world either...I just got caught up in something I didn't understand until it was way too late...

 

You play with fire you get burned. I just about burned down the house...in a manner of speaking.

 

I watched some friends this weekend get high...sat right next to them and just said, "NO." One of them was fine afterward & just kept talking & walking around...the other one started to get that paranoid aura going on but actually didn't quite get there. I saw a lot of restraint/resistance to that feeling...and for me...I just sat back and had a SPARKS and decided that saying no was good. I just didn't want to feel that "high" again...and happy that I didn't do a hit.

 

No way... I almost had the identical circumstance! The thing that ticked me about mine was they decided to "do just a little" get ya going hits AFTER we'd decided to go out to dinner, they changed it to a sit and party party party and "later" we'll go to the bar and "f" eating out. So there I sat, had been skiing all day on the gulf out bay shell island, kinda sunbaked, yoiu know the tired, hungry feeling you have after all day in the sun... Add to that no eating all day, only a few sodas and a gatorade, fresh shower, cool a/c then I go over there all ready to eat and have some drinks at Salt Rock Grill and POOF, they all change.

 

They usually don't party, it was someone's idea to take a few puffs after they cooked their stuff to wake up.

 

Needless to say, I'm sticking to dating and seeking not to hang with friends.

 

They as a whole don't use often when they get together but seemingly they're doing it more and more. They party on weekends since they have jobs where the weekends are free most of the time while I don't have that, I'm available or on call.

 

I've seen rich and poor use, their is a difference, I see or should I say I saw more relaxation and laughter and "party mode" mentality versus the less fortunate use it to escape their personal hell.

 

Well, now that I thought of this post, I'm headed to go exercise! No seriously I was headed that way anyway... cya

 

bob