riobikini Posted January 20, 2006 Share Posted January 20, 2006 Cali, What a shame, (Smile), -now you have to do it all over! Imagine, -all those young ladies to meet, greet, and look over. Hmmmm..... I'm sure no one would like to be in your shoes. (Smile) Keep the faith, man. -Rio Link to post Share on other sites
notmakingsense Posted January 20, 2006 Share Posted January 20, 2006 Cali- Refresh my memory- how long were you two together originally? Then, you guys took a break?? Then got back together. I would love to see a picture of the two of you together at the wedding. I gotta see what this chickie looked like. I've never seen a guy go this gaga. When I left my exhusband- and we'd been married 13 years, he didn't obsess like this and I've got it going on fairly well if I must say so myself! Ah. Mz Pixie -- how soon you forget! This is Mr. Overly Gaga here -- just listening in on this thread and still obsessing over my lost love after 2 months! I continue to amaze myself at just how long I can wallow in the mire of my breakup -- but, I'm not going to hijak this thread... look for a new thread from me soon! Link to post Share on other sites
Author CaliGuy Posted January 20, 2006 Author Share Posted January 20, 2006 Ah. Mz Pixie -- how soon you forget! This is Mr. Overly Gaga here -- just listening in on this thread and still obsessing over my lost love after 2 months! I continue to amaze myself at just how long I can wallow in the mire of my breakup -- but, I'm not going to hijak this thread... look for a new thread from me soon! What I miss most, my friend, is the companionship, not necessarily her. There's a big difference. I wouldn't want her back the way that she is and the interest I am getting from other women is certainly boosting the confidence and my spirit. Keep the name though, it does fit you Link to post Share on other sites
Author CaliGuy Posted January 20, 2006 Author Share Posted January 20, 2006 Cali, What a shame, (Smile), -now you have to do it all over! Imagine, -all those young ladies to meet, greet, and look over. Hmmmm..... I'm sure no one would like to be in your shoes. (Smile) Keep the faith, man. -Rio Sometime starting from scratch is a good thing, as long as you've learned the lessons of your past. Thanks for the kind words, Rio. You're a gem. Link to post Share on other sites
riobikini Posted January 20, 2006 Share Posted January 20, 2006 CaliGuy, You're always welcome. And seeing you in much better spirits has put a smile on my face for the rest of my day. What a wonderful way to get a day started! (Smile) Yours, -Rio Link to post Share on other sites
greyhound Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 Wow.....Thank you all!! Cali guy. Thanks for posting all of this. I might be fairly new at this but I have pretty much gone through the same thing. Had a traumatic experience, had a weekend date with a woman whom I had met on line. After intense flirting etal, decided to meet. No sparks. And then I froze up while watching" Desperate Housewives" with her. A Sunday night ritual with the ex. My ex was a very similar person to (it appears) to yours, 6 year relationship, engagement ring, all of a suuden GONE. My friend, YOU ARE MY HERO!!!. It made me realize that there is some one else going through much the same thing and I'm "revelling " in it. I was the caring sensitive one. Had a rough go of it during the Holiday season but now I am fine. Now, I guess the point of this is I wondered what would happen with a chance encounter. We do live fairly close. I DO avoid the places that we used to frequent as a couple. But I know it is inevitable. Your words of wisdom make me feel so much more prepared. To all the woman and guys who helped you get through this,thanks to you all too!! You are all gonna do fine. Again, thank you all for sharing this. I hope I can impart some of my own wisdom to this site. I plan on spending some more time here. Link to post Share on other sites
fooled Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 Geez, CaliGuy - the more I read your posts, the more similarities I see between our situations. However, I do feel that you did nothing wrong. She has a problem just like my ex - she doesn't respect herself therefore she cannot respect anyone else. Good to see you are ready to get back out there. I battle every day missing her and then having to remind myself of all the attrocities she committed against me to give me perspective. Then I just hurt. Link to post Share on other sites
salmagundi Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 Wow CG, I read one of your posts back there, where you mentioned that you're girlfriend was the type that needed to feel she had to chase the guy to stay interested and where you write: "She even said I was "too good to be true." Maybe that's it. She just felt like there's no way a guy can be all that, something must be wrong" I hafta say, I was floored. My ex (virginie) said the exact same things. That It was unbelievable that I existed, that I was "unique au monde." And that needed guys to make her chase them.... Given that it hasnt worked out with your ex I guess maybe I should start getting over mine anytime now too... oh well, salmagundi Link to post Share on other sites
Author CaliGuy Posted January 22, 2006 Author Share Posted January 22, 2006 Thanks all for the well wishes. Don't think for a minute that she's out of my mind completely. It annoys me that she still is, but it's usually when I am the least busy. When I keep my pre-occupied I think of her very little. Dec 27th was the last time she sent me an email. I never replied. When I saw her at the client site, I could tell it bothered her a bit. Wow CG, I read one of your posts back there, where you mentioned that you're girlfriend was the type that needed to feel she had to chase the guy to stay interested and where you write: "She even said I was "too good to be true." Maybe that's it. She just felt like there's no way a guy can be all that, something must be wrong" I hafta say, I was floored. My ex (virginie) said the exact same things. That It was unbelievable that I existed, that I was "unique au monde." And that needed guys to make her chase them.... Given that it hasnt worked out with your ex I guess maybe I should start getting over mine anytime now too... oh well, salmagundi Sal, the best thing to do is to go out with the girl from France, but only after you tell Virginie that you can't wait around forever for her to get off the fence. I think to some degree my ex knows how much I love her and she thinks she could come back anytime. Perhaps Virginie knows this and if you move on and she decides she wants you, great. But if not you have many other prospects. Someone else said it best: "What can this girl give you that you can't find with someone else?" Answer: "Nothing." I feel the same way about my Ex. Link to post Share on other sites
salmagundi Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 thanks CG for the persistant ass kicking. I'll be seeing virg tomorrow. I'll give her that chance to give me some reason to think I'm not wasting my time, then I will start moving on. I'll ask the french girl out next time i see her. Nothing heavy though, just friends for coffee... Frustrating because you're right. If I stick around virginie, we'll go nowhere. If I bail, it probably is the only chance that she'll make up her f**king mind. Bit of a conundrum though... salmagundi Link to post Share on other sites
Author CaliGuy Posted January 23, 2006 Author Share Posted January 23, 2006 thanks CG for the persistant ass kicking. I'll be seeing virg tomorrow. I'll give her that chance to give me some reason to think I'm not wasting my time, then I will start moving on. I'll ask the french girl out next time i see her. Nothing heavy though, just friends for coffee... Frustrating because you're right. If I stick around virginie, we'll go nowhere. If I bail, it probably is the only chance that she'll make up her f**king mind. Bit of a conundrum though... The question is how long do you want to wait? It's up to you. She might make up her mind tomorrow or never. I waited around for two years for my wishy-washy ex to make up her mind. In the end she didn't choose me and I ended up holding the bag, so to speak. On another note, my date did not call today so... Dunno why, as we confirmed our plans yesterday. At least I am not angry because I have a ton to choose from. Better to weed them out early in the game Link to post Share on other sites
fooled Posted January 23, 2006 Share Posted January 23, 2006 Crap - just when we need him most, CG's going to find a girl and leave us! Link to post Share on other sites
Author CaliGuy Posted January 23, 2006 Author Share Posted January 23, 2006 Crap - just when we need him most, CG's going to find a girl and leave us! When I do find someone, I'll probably be here to get advice and keep my head in check so I don't make the same mistakes. I'll also be passing along what worked for me and what didn't. I do know one thing. I am not the same guy I was even two months ago. I have gone since December 9th without initiating any contact with her. That's a record for me. haha. Link to post Share on other sites
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