SideChick23 Posted September 9 Share Posted September 9 If your spouse had a couples massage done with another female (not his wife) would you consider that cheating? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted September 9 Share Posted September 9 Of course it is 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Gebidozo Posted September 9 Share Posted September 9 (edited) I assumed this happened without your prior knowledge and consent? Then yes, it’s cheating. Or at least borderline cheating. Edited September 9 by Gebidozo Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted September 9 Share Posted September 9 It means they've been cheating for a while. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Author SideChick23 Posted September 9 Author Share Posted September 9 For context…found out by accident the massage happened about 3 months ago. Not sure if should confront or not. Should it be a deal breaker? 1 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted September 9 Share Posted September 9 4 minutes ago, SideChick23 said: For context…found out by accident the massage happened about 3 months ago. Not sure if should confront or not. Should it be a deal breaker? Hang on, did you marry the guy who was cheating on his wife with you? Or have you met someone new and got married since then? 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Author SideChick23 Posted September 9 Author Share Posted September 9 15 minutes ago, basil67 said: Hang on, did you marry the guy who was cheating on his wife with you? Or have you met someone new and got married since then? I was asking on behalf of my best friend. I didn’t know what to tell her and this group has always been so helpful. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted September 9 Share Posted September 9 It's best to have her talk with us Quote Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted September 9 Share Posted September 9 59 minutes ago, SideChick23 said: I was asking on behalf of my best friend. I didn’t know what to tell her and this group has always been so helpful. So your best friend is in the opposite position than you are? she is married to the MM who is cheating? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted September 9 Share Posted September 9 2 hours ago, SideChick23 said: I was asking on behalf of my best friend. I didn’t know what to tell her and this group has always been so helpful. So, male spouse went to a couples massage with a female who was not his wife. For context…is it you or the wife that found out by accident the couples massage happened 3 months ago? I assume “couples” massage as in the massage was marketed for romantic partners. This makes the situation even more questionable because it implies a level of intimacy and romantic intent behind his partner's back. Coupled with the fact that it was done in "secret" 3 months ago with the wife having no knowledge, there is a level of deceit and lying involved. So, yes, I would consider this as a form of cheating. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted September 9 Share Posted September 9 7 hours ago, SideChick23 said: For context…found out by accident the massage happened about 3 months ago. Not sure if should confront or not. Should it be a deal breaker? Definitely confront and be ready to hear a bunch of lies from him. You ever been to a couple massage? It's not something you do with an opposite gender friend. It involves getting naked in front of each other. This is the type of things you do when you're already intimate. Second thing -he paid for it. Not only he's cheating with her but he's investing money on her. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted September 9 Share Posted September 9 How in the world does one schedule a couples massage with someone who is not their romantic partner? That defies logic - 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Leihla_B Posted September 9 Share Posted September 9 It sounds like this is the only activity with this other woman that your friend has discovered so far. I'd keep quiet about it, review all financial accounts, and take all questionable information to seek legal advice. From there I'd be able to operate on real information rather than emotional speculation alone. I'd have clear options for decision making, even if that means opening a discussion with spouse in an attempt to save the marriage--or not. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
happyhorizons Posted September 16 Share Posted September 16 On 9/8/2024 at 9:50 PM, SideChick23 said: I was asking on behalf of my best friend. I didn’t know what to tell her and this group has always been so helpful. What did your friend decide? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Gforce77i Posted September 16 Share Posted September 16 It's not cheating, but daaaaaamn (he might be) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
jasonblackheart01 Posted September 18 Share Posted September 18 No, its not. Don't be foolish. Lets reverse the role If a man(not your husband) massage you, is that consider cheating? No? Its called double standard. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mrin Posted September 18 Share Posted September 18 (edited) 6 hours ago, jasonblackheart01 said: No, its not. Don't be foolish. Lets reverse the role If a man(not your husband) massage you, is that consider cheating? No? Its called double standard. This isn't about the masseur. It is about who the other person getting massaged is. Have you ever had a couples massage? Would you be cool with your wife/GF having a couples massage with one of her male work buddies? Edited September 18 by Mrin Typo Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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