Author Tagalz Posted November 17, 2018 Author Share Posted November 17, 2018 I'm confused. She dumped you after she had sex with you? After she told you that she was interested in a FWB? Maybe she didn't think the sex was good? Maybe she realized you get emotionally attached when you have sex and she didn't want to string you along, making you think that there was a chance could turn into a relationship? Ah. So this is a case of the girl having more experience than you and you feeling that you don't measure up to her, or to her previous sexual partners? Yeah, that could be a problem. We dudes have the habit of comparing ourselves to the girl's previous partners and feeling that we have to be better. When I was 19 I hooked up with a 45 year old woman who had slept with more than 50 men. I was feeling pretty insecure about it, which made the experience not so enjoyable for myself and for her, but she was patient and things got a lot better. The thing is that this girl is 18. It's not like teenager girls or boys have abundant patience or emotional maturity. Hi again, Sabaton and thanks for commenting as I'm still trying to recover. At the moment she's just sending me "Gm" or "Gn" snaps but she does send it to everyone. I either leave it open or I wait like 8 hours to open it. Your question: She dumped you after she had sex with you? After she told you that she was interested in a FWB? Maybe she didn't think the sex was good? Maybe she realized you get emotionally attached when you have sex and she didn't want to string you along, making you think that there was a chance could turn into a relationship? My answer: That's what I thought, but looking back she briefly mentioned that she had to move when she came over for the first time .Remember we didn't have sex the first time she came over at my place. It was the second time. That means no she didn't dumped me after the sex. She had been planning to dumped me before that. She didn't told me she wanted FWB, all of her wanting to party and get drunk says that and of course her age. I don't think it has to do with the sex. Yes I was the one with the feelings and she may think that I will get even more emotionally attached after the sex. So she had to cut me loose. It's the right choice. Both yes and no. She don't have more experience than me when it comes to FWB. I was the one who she had it with. She tried it with other guys, but she failed because you know they left her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 17, 2018 Author Share Posted November 17, 2018 (edited) Ok, are you sure you know what you want? first you say you want a relationship with this girl. Then you say - after she cuts off all contact with you - that what you wanted with her was a FWB and that you wanted to have sex with her everyday. Alright, were you trying to appear to be a ''decent'' guy, like you wanted to show her that there are still ''good'' men out there by telling her that what you wanted was to have an exclusive romantic relationship with her? Were you trying to distance yourself from the men she complains about, the men she claims had sex with her and then dumped her when what she claims to have wanted with those men was a relationship? Bro. You kinda shot yourself in the foot there trying to be a white knight. This girl obviously loves sex, and she thinks you are hot. She probably had feelings for the men who dumped her after lying to her, telling her that they wanted a relationship with her. There's a difference there. Those guys, she cared about on an emotional level. With you, she gets horny, and wants to sleep with you, but she got no romantic feelings for you, and apparently she's not the type to develop romantic feelings for the men she sleeps with. Take it as it is, don't try to make a Nicholas Sparks romance out of it. It means that if this girl was in love with you that you could act like jerk and she'd still take you back, but because she only want sex from you - she doesn't care about you all that much after what you did. Look. You are very young. You have so much youth in you left. Don't waste it on a girl who doesn't even remember your phone number anymore, probably. Go out there and find yourself a girl who is as crazy about you as you are about her. There's thousands of women for you to meet in Oslo! Q: Ok, are you sure you know what you want? Alright, were you trying to appear to be a ''decent'' guy, like you wanted to show her that there are still ''good'' men out there by telling her that what you wanted was to have an exclusive romantic relationship with her? Were you trying to distance yourself from the men she complains about, the men she claims had sex with her and then dumped her when what she claims to have wanted with those men was a relationship? A: I'm sure of what I want now and it doesn't matter to me. If I meet a girl who wants FWB I'll take it. But If I had to choose between FWB or a relationship I would choose relationship. But again, I was lacking experience and If I had it I would just take and have it with her... but I made the decision too late. I had to make it before she came over and I didn't and I went with asking her out - which was a mistake. If I told her that day that I wanted FWB she would sure still want to **** me now. Yes I wanted to show her that I'm a good guy who won't leave her. A girl wants a bad boy to be good for her and I was like that. She didn't care because all she wanted was sex. No whenever she mentioned a guy I didn't say anything, because I acted like I don't care. As for the men that left her.. It's unclear if the guys wanted a relationship or not. It could be that the guy left her because they were afraid she would get feelings. OR that it was just a one night stand thing. But yeah I agree I shot myself in the foot asking her out on the date. Edited November 17, 2018 by Tagalz Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 17, 2018 Author Share Posted November 17, 2018 You should have told her, ''that was amazing. It has never felt this good before. I would love to make this a regular thing with you ''to which she would reply, if interested: yes. You made the girl think that she wasn't all that good in bed, because if she had rocked your world(in her mind) you would be out there trying to get it again, and again, with her. Girls at her age are extra sensitive and paranoid about everything, and she very likely left feeling like you didn't enjoy the sex. Why didn't you kiss her and touch her and bang her more? Why can she only party in a nightclub at the age of 19? ''that was amazing. It has never felt this good before. I would love to make this a regular thing with you " Ah DAMMIT I could save myself.. why didn't I think to say that? Stupid me... I can still ask her to come over, but Gaeta and D0n says no tho... or should I still ask? Well I don't know. It's the rule here in Norway. There are nightclubs who lets in people at her age, but it often closes at midnight. Link to post Share on other sites
sabaton Posted November 17, 2018 Share Posted November 17, 2018 Hi again, Sabaton and thanks for commenting as I'm still trying to recover. At the moment she's just sending me "Gm" or "Gn" snaps but she does send it to everyone. I either leave it open or I wait like 8 hours to open it. She didn't block you on snapchat. Girls usually hurry up and block the guys they don't want to talk to. The fact that she still has you on her snapchat list might suggest she still wants you to be a part of her life. Who knows, maybe a couple of months from now she'll snap you asking how you're doing. lol, alright. Don't play games. You're 22 years old. Open those snaps if you want to, or don't. Don't wait like 8 hours trying to play hard to get. My answer: That's what I thought, but looking back she briefly mentioned that she had to move when she came over for the first time .Remember we didn't have sex the first time she came over at my place. It was the second time. That means no she didn't dumped me after the sex. She had been planning to dumped me before that. She didn't told me she wanted FWB, all of her wanting to party and get drunk says that and of course her age. I don't think it has to do with the sex. Can't you just talk to her? Like instead of all of these guesses and suggestions and what-ifs why not just have a normal, decent conversation with her instead of playing cat and mouse? The fact that she likes to party and to have casual sex doesn't mean she's not interested in something more than a FWB, man. Yes I was the one with the feelings and she may think that I will get even more emotionally attached after the sex. So she had to cut me loose. It's the right choice. Oh well. Both yes and no. She don't have more experience than me when it comes to FWB. I was the one who she had it with. She tried it with other guys, but she failed because you know they left her. She complained about guys leaving her? Then she got into those FWBS to attempt to convince the guys to date her lol. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 17, 2018 Author Share Posted November 17, 2018 You are someone who wears his heart on his sleeve. You are a sensitive guy. You have to be a bit more reserved in that sense & not lead with your emotions. So how do I not become sensitive? I was only like that because I wanted relationship. And how do I not lead with my emotions? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 17, 2018 Author Share Posted November 17, 2018 She didn't block you on snapchat. Girls usually hurry up and block the guys they don't want to talk to. The fact that she still has you on her snapchat list might suggest she still wants you to be a part of her life. Who knows, maybe a couple of months from now she'll snap you asking how you're doing. Can't you just talk to her? Like instead of all of these guesses and suggestions and what-ifs why not just have a normal, decent conversation with her instead of playing cat and mouse? The fact that she likes to party and to have casual sex doesn't mean she's not interested in something more than a FWB, man. Well I don't see any point of talking to her. She already cut me loose and she won't give me an honest answer Link to post Share on other sites
sabaton Posted November 17, 2018 Share Posted November 17, 2018 Yes I wanted to show her that I'm a good guy who won't leave her. A girl wants a bad boy to be good for her and I was like that. She didn't care because all she wanted was sex. Nah. What a girl wants is a guy she feels sexually attracted to, treats her right, and gives her a good dicking. That has nothing to do with being a bad boy, as there's plenty of those who are terrible in bed, too selfish. You blew it, but you mustn't be too hard on yourself. You are very young and it's not like guys are used to pretty girls wanting to just fck lol on the regular, so you're not used to that yet and you still believe that girls want relationships only. Link to post Share on other sites
sabaton Posted November 17, 2018 Share Posted November 17, 2018 So how do I not become sensitive? I was only like that because I wanted relationship. And how do I not lead with my emotions? first you come to realize that most relationships are transient. That, no matter how hot you are, there's always going to be a hotter guy. You come to understand that no one is special. It's just your hormones and your dick that makes you feel that this girl or that another girl is special, but that usually wears off as you grow older. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 17, 2018 Author Share Posted November 17, 2018 Why didn't you kiss her and touch her and bang her more? Should I ask her to come over then? Link to post Share on other sites
sabaton Posted November 17, 2018 Share Posted November 17, 2018 Well I don't see any point of talking to her. She already cut me loose and she won't give me an honest answer nah. She didn't cut you loose. A year or so ago I was sexting this girl. She had a crush on a friend of mine but that friend of mine had a crush on another girl and had been crushing on her..ahem, for the past 9 years(they had never met in person btw) but one day my friend gets drunk, after he found out the girl he wanted had just gotten a new boyfriend, and he starts being flirty with the girl I was sexting with, and as it happened the girl instantly blocked me on snap and started talking crap to my friend because she was afraid I'd tell my friend she was a thot or something. Should I ask her to come over then? Wait a week. Then send her a casual snap asking her how she is. If she replies to it, go from there. If she reads it and doesn't reply, or if she doesn't open the message don't bother. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 17, 2018 Author Share Posted November 17, 2018 She didn't block you on snapchat. Can't you just talk to her? Like instead of all of these guesses and suggestions and what-ifs why not just have a normal, decent conversation with her instead of playing cat and mouse? The fact that she likes to party and to have casual sex doesn't mean she's not interested in something more than a FWB, man. No she didn't block me on snapchat, but I was the one who lost the streaks... What should I say to her? Like do you want FWB or relationship? it sounds awful Link to post Share on other sites
sabaton Posted November 17, 2018 Share Posted November 17, 2018 No she didn't block me on snapchat, but I was the one who lost the streaks... What should I say to her? Like do you want FWB or relationship? it sounds awful stop thinking for a second and just go with the flow, man. Start talking to other girls. You're all over the place because right now you're obsessed with this girl. If you are getting positive attention from other girls you won't care that much about this one. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 17, 2018 Author Share Posted November 17, 2018 stop thinking for a second and just go with the flow, man. Start talking to other girls. You're all over the place because right now you're obsessed with this girl. If you are getting positive attention from other girls you won't care that much about this one. I'm using tinder so I'm on the hunt But you said I should have a talk with her... like I don't know what to say to begin with... Should I say something like this: "So I know you like to have fun and I had the best sex last time, so would you be interested in having a FWB with me?" Link to post Share on other sites
sabaton Posted November 17, 2018 Share Posted November 17, 2018 I'm using tinder so I'm on the hunt But you said I should have a talk with her... like I don't know what to say to begin with... Should I say something like this: "So I know you like to have fun and I had the best sex last time, so would you be interested in having a FWB with me?" I said take one week off from texting her. You have more than enough time to figure it out. Nah man, say this. ''I want to bang you on the regular.'' Don't come out sounding like you're begging for it, that's a a huge turn off. But... don't come out telling her you want a FWB just like that. Wait a week, then send her a snap asking her how she is, and if she replies start talking to her again. Flirt with her. See how she responds to that and then talk about what you want. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 17, 2018 Author Share Posted November 17, 2018 I said take one week off from texting her. You have more than enough time to figure it out. Nah man, say this. ''I want to bang you on the regular.'' Don't come out sounding like you're begging for it, that's a a huge turn off. But... don't come out telling her you want a FWB just like that. Wait a week, then send her a snap asking her how she is, and if she replies start talking to her again. Flirt with her. See how she responds to that and then talk about what you want. It has almost been a week. last time I met her was tuesday and you know the days go by fast. I will update you! Link to post Share on other sites
sabaton Posted November 17, 2018 Share Posted November 17, 2018 It has almost been a week. last time I met her was tuesday and you know the days go by fast. I will update you! Awesome Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 18, 2018 Author Share Posted November 18, 2018 I'm confused. She dumped you after she had sex with you? After she told you that she was interested in a FWB? Maybe she didn't think the sex was good? Maybe she realized you get emotionally attached when you have sex and she didn't want to string you along. I was re reading the whole thread so I came back to this comment of yours, Sabaton. I remember saying that she didn't dumped me after sex and that we had sex the second time she came over. That was wrong answer. The answer is "Yes" she dumped med after sex. Not right after but after the movie. But I still don't think it has anything to do with the sex It was just awkward but we both enjoyed it. You don't need to answer this... Just replying to make it clear that she dumped med after sex Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 19, 2018 Author Share Posted November 19, 2018 Is it maybe by any chance that she dumped me because she thinks I’m a awkward person? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 20, 2018 Author Share Posted November 20, 2018 Awesome This is what I sent her: Me: What’s up? Her: Trying to do some math homework but I’m tired of it so I’m thinking to take a break Me: Want to come over? Her: Nah I’m procrastinating. Me: Okii. So she seems to open up my snaps very fast and are replying with long text, but she still procrastinating me. She’s not interested, but it was worth a try. It’s no point in asking her again. I might aswell delete her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 21, 2018 Author Share Posted November 21, 2018 This will probably be my last post. She blew me off for the second time when I asked her to come over. Her reason was the same "I got homework" So on the same day she tells me that she wants to talk to me. I call her but she says that we can talk tomorrow which is today. I called her and we had a talk. Here is the conversation: Her: "I don't think this will work" Me: Work? We are not in a relationship Her: "What? I'm confused you asked me on a date" Me: "I asked you on a date to see if there was any interest from you" Her: "Well I'm not interested that's why I blew you off when you asked for the 2th date" Me: "What are you interested in then? FWB?" Her: "No I'm interested in going on with my life" Me:"That's bull**** you wanted to have fun and get drunk" Her:"Okey It's BS so what now? we are going to keep going?" Me: "No point because you don't have any interest" Her: "Yeah" Me:"Thanks for telling me the reason and good luck in your life" Her:"Thanks you too" what I can get from here is that as I have written on my posts is that I was not honest with my self and I shot myself on the foot asking her out. I gave her the wrong impression that's why she was thinking we were together. If I only had been more decisive and not asked her out.. I would still have more fun with her. But I think there is more than that. Maybe I have to work on my physical appearance? Like going to the gym, saving my beard and get a fresh haircut? I would thank everyone for being there when I needed help. I look at this as a way to learn from my mistake. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted November 21, 2018 Share Posted November 21, 2018 what I can get from here is that as I have written on my posts is that I was not honest with my self and I shot myself on the foot asking her out. I gave her the wrong impression that's why she was thinking we were together. If I only had been more decisive and not asked her out.. I would still have more fun with her. But I think there is more than that. Maybe I have to work on my physical appearance? Like going to the gym, saving my beard and get a fresh haircut?. Why is it so hard for you to understand she just is not into you and nothing you would have done differently would have changed that. No haircut, no shaven face, no playing cool, no appearing uninterested, NOTHING! There is no magic recipe for a man to win a woman over.....it's all about her feeling it with you OR NOT. For every different scenario you are running in your head you would have had the same result! Her not wanting you as a boyfriend OR as a fwb. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 21, 2018 Author Share Posted November 21, 2018 Why is it so hard for you to understand she just is not into you Gaeta I understand that, but her saying she's not interested is making me think there is more to that comment Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 21, 2018 Author Share Posted November 21, 2018 there is more to that comment Don't you also think that? It's easy for girls to just cut off the contact by saying I'm not interested. It has to be more to that Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted November 21, 2018 Share Posted November 21, 2018 Don't you also think that? It's easy for girls to just cut off the contact by saying I'm not interested. It has to be more to that For goodness sake like what???? There is not always a reason!!!! Why isn't it enough??? Anything else she could add = not interested!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tagalz Posted November 21, 2018 Author Share Posted November 21, 2018 For goodness sake like what???? There is not always a reason!!!! Why isn't it enough??? Anything else she could add = not interested!! fine, chill gaeta Link to post Share on other sites
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