Dating exhaustion

[Cookiesandough]

I realized a couple weeks ago I’ve always been happier single and before I started dating I had more fun with my free time and felt more freedom. I thought that since most people pair up or want to something was wrong with me for not liking it. But I believe now I am just different from them in that respect and that’s perfectly ok. I’m just going to do what makes me happy, regardless of the plan culture maps out for me.

[Versacehottie]

So wait, I'm criticized for posting just headshots , then I get criticized for posting full body pics? Ok, we gotta pic one.

 

I wasn't looking for romance on co. I was looking for a motorcycle pal, and I found him though it was a pain.

 

This was last year, not all those other years. Last year was my only time on Craigslist.

 

Not really criticizing you--analyzing your choices so we can address your OP and help you figure out the answer since it is baffling to you. It's not baffling to me.

 

You are failing to even grasp the advice regarding craigslist, which again proves that you are naive or more like hardheaded about your message and message venue. Regarding Craigslist, the biggest point is that is the WRONG venue there. Anything but selling items section is sleazy. So if you get sleazy from there don't be surprised. I don't know a single person that is looking to date that chooses that venue. It sure seems to have lots of people where the last thing they are looking for is a relationship--which is OBVIOUS by the rest of the posts there. Are you so self-focused that you don't garner anything from others experiences? Look at the other posts on craigslist in their various sections where people meet up for dating, and etc. You will see a strong lean in a certain way and type of people. Even a quick look around loveshack will let you know where you are out of the norm, i.e. every guy asking for sex on the first date and where you might educate yourself and not feel so bad because others go throughout the same thing, i.e. relationships that are 1 and done for a VARIETY of reasons. Anyway the posts on Craigslist are out of this world entertaining and that should have been your first clue. I would be hard pressed to believe there are normal, normal-functioning guys on there.

 

Full-body shots is secondary and maybe you just used not conducive wording. To me, that again sounds narcissistic and attention seeking. The ones I know, called like that would be. If you mean CANDID shots where you are doing an activity or with a group of friends and a person can see you from head to toe, that is the road many people on this thread told you to do. Anyway again on craigslist, a selfie would have reeled it in, if at all possible. Not to mention if you were seeking friends to do motorcycle rides with, who needs to see your photo? I would want to see a pic of your motorcycle or hear about where you like to ride. Can you see how that again sends the wrong message? It says you are using the motorcycle angle to meet guys--nothing wrong with it but on craigslist?!?! OMG.

 

A lot of fitness girls have fake boobs too--no judgement but it does send a certain message, even if it's not accurate. You have to understand how you are perceived in the world and then work to send out an accurate message about yourself. Not try to change the world. that will never work.

[hotpotato]

I’m fairly certain that a majority of men whom are dating Are indeed looking for a long term relationship, yes, they are also interested in sex (again, not mutually exclusive). But, they - assuming your narrative is correct - aren’t interested in a relationship with you. Asking for sex might be their way to salvage a bad date (“nothing to lose here, so I’ll just go for it”).

 

A lot of different people are trying to provide insight, your instinct is to blame external factors, going into defensive mode, instead of using said insight to self reflect. If this pattern is true for your dating life “guys are just looking for sex”, might be another excuse of yours to avoid the hard fact: They are simply not into you.

 

I get that people aren't always gonna click. If they're not interested in me fine, just leave.

 

Also, these guys don't even try to get to know me. It would be more understandable if they tried to get to know me first then made a decision.

[hotpotato]

Not really criticizing you--analyzing your choices so we can address your OP and help you figure out the answer since it is baffling to you. It's not baffling to me.

 

You are failing to even grasp the advice regarding craigslist, which again proves that you are naive or more like hardheaded about your message and message venue. Regarding Craigslist, the biggest point is that is the WRONG venue there. Anything but selling items section is sleazy. So if you get sleazy from there don't be surprised. I don't know a single person that is looking to date that chooses that venue. It sure seems to have lots of people where the last thing they are looking for is a relationship--which is OBVIOUS by the rest of the posts there. Are you so self-focused that you don't garner anything from others experiences? Look at the other posts on craigslist in their various sections where people meet up for dating, and etc. You will see a strong lean in a certain way and type of people. Even a quick look around loveshack will let you know where you are out of the norm, i.e. every guy asking for sex on the first date and where you might educate yourself and not feel so bad because others go throughout the same thing, i.e. relationships that are 1 and done for a VARIETY of reasons. Anyway the posts on Craigslist are out of this world entertaining and that should have been your first clue. I would be hard pressed to believe there are normal, normal-functioning guys on there.

 

Full-body shots is secondary and maybe you just used not conducive wording. To me, that again sounds narcissistic and attention seeking. The ones I know, called like that would be. If you mean CANDID shots where you are doing an activity or with a group of friends and a person can see you from head to toe, that is the road many people on this thread told you to do. Anyway again on craigslist, a selfie would have reeled it in, if at all possible. Not to mention if you were seeking friends to do motorcycle rides with, who needs to see your photo? I would want to see a pic of your motorcycle or hear about where you like to ride. Can you see how that again sends the wrong message? It says you are using the motorcycle angle to meet guys--nothing wrong with it but on craigslist?!?! OMG.

 

A lot of fitness girls have fake boobs too--no judgement but it does send a certain message, even if it's not accurate. You have to understand how you are perceived in the world and then work to send out an accurate message about yourself. Not try to change the world. that will never work.

 

I never said I was trying to date on Craigslist. That's what I was trying to explain. I have not nor have I ever looked for a relationship on Craigslist.

 

I was looking for someone to give me an occasional motorcycle ride.

 

For dating I've only used pic and Yahoo personals and chat. I used yahoo like 10 years ago.

 

Also, I've done most of my dating before the fake boobs, and they are not obviously fake. Many natural women have larger breasts than me proportionately. The only guy I've dealt with after the go on job is my motorcycle friend.

 

So am I narcisstic for taking quick pics of m myself at my house? Of course, I would send a photo and they would send one back if we decided to meet. That way we know who the other person is. Where else am I going to meet motorcycle men? I'm at work on bike nights (Thursdays). Heck, I'd ride with a chic, too. Btw the guys who had motorcycles did send pics of themselves with their motorcycles. I chose CL bc it's free.

[hotpotato]

I realized a couple weeks ago I’ve always been happier single and before I started dating I had more fun with my free time and felt more freedom. I thought that since most people pair up or want to something was wrong with me for not liking it. But I believe now I am just different from them in that respect and that’s perfectly ok. I’m just going to do what makes me happy, regardless of the plan culture maps out for me.

 

Yes, and this is what my thread was about.

 

I feel like I should want to date, but I really don't. I'd be forcing it. However, I fear I've spent too much time in my adult life alone. I'm not used to be, games, having to sort through guys and discover their intentions, etc. I mostly live in peace.

[hotpotato]

I get that people aren't always gonna click. If they're not interested in me fine, just leave.

 

Also, these guys don't even try to get to know me. It would be more understandable if they tried to get to know me first then made a decision.

 

Oh and if they weren't into me, the feeling was mutual. Most of the guys weren't really my type. Also, the guys who do get to know me say I'm vibrant and funny. My ex bragged about how much FUN I was, but in our situation we had to spend quite a bit of time together, more than going on a date.

 

I've already said I need to be in a situation that is slower. My swim instructor grew to like me? Because we spent time together and talked. I kept making him laugh.

 

[hotpotato]

As far as being put of the norm, well, that's me.

 

I had a man offer me sex in a movie theater. I'd never seen him before. I was wearing a very long dress. I had a co-worker try to have sex with me at work. I've had a lot of odd experiences with men. I had a guy who seemed nice invite me to his job to 'talk' aka sex. And on.

 

I'm tired.

Edited March 20, 2018 by hotpotato

[hotpotato]

Also, there were men who seemed to like me but still wanted to hasve sex right off the bat. *shrug*

 

To be clear, I don't have to go on Craigslist for attention. Pretty much any woman who isn't too unattractive can get attention from men. I am not secretly trying to meet boyfriends under the guise of trying to find motorcycle rides.

 

To keep it 100, I get asked out quite a bit nowadays esp when I walk the beach. I could even ask guys out myself if I wanted and probably be pretty successful in getting numbers.

 

Many people missed the premise of this thread-i don't want to date.

[LoverOfDance]

OP, I think I'm the only one on this entire site that feels your pain. I empathize with you.

 

I don't know if people know this but A LOT of men have issues with sex and I think women are naïve and maybe ignorant about the number of men who have sex and porn addictions. I believe it feels like all men want from you is sex because honestly if you asked a lot of men to choose between sex and love, many would choose sex. Yes, IT'S TRUE. Some might even say love but if they ACTUALLY had the option, believe me, they would choose sex.

 

To digress a little, men are stronger than women, physically but I believe that women are mentally stronger. Men honestly have less will power when it comes to sex. This is why we will always have more power in the bedroom (even though we sometimes don't exercise that power) - too many men are seriously slaves to the p$$$$ (excuse my language).

 

You feeling like a slab of meat sometimes is the result of the craziness that goes on in the minds of men. Instead of developing self control, they will say it's your fault and tell you that you were wearing the wrong clothes or that you were at the wrong venue or the wrong place at the wrong time. Women will also agree because the lack of self control of men has been normalized. It is not their job to control themselves and act right, it is your job to be careful because if you're not, whatever happens to you will be all your fault.

Edited March 20, 2018 by LoverOfDance

[Highndry]

OP, I think I'm the only one on this entire site that feels your pain. I empathize with you.

 

I don't know if people know this but A LOT of men have issues with sex and I think women are naïve and maybe ignorant about the number of men who have sex and porn addictions. I believe it feels like all men want from you is sex because honestly if you asked a lot of men to choose between sex and love, many would choose sex. Yes, IT'S TRUE. Some might even say love but if they ACTUALLY had the option, believe me, they would choose sex.

 

To digress a little, men are stronger than women, physically but I believe that women are mentally stronger. Men honestly have less will power when it comes to sex. This is why we will always have more power in the bedroom (even though we sometimes don't exercise that power) - too many men are seriously slaves to the p$$$$ (excuse my language).

 

You feeling like a slab of meat sometimes is the result of the craziness that goes on in the minds of men. Instead of developing self control, they will say it's your fault and tell you that you were wearing the wrong clothes or that you were at the wrong venue or the wrong place at the wrong time. Women will also agree because the lack of self control of men has been normalized. It is not their job to control themselves and act right, it is your job to be careful because if you're not, whatever happens to you will be all your fault.

 

What a load of horse*****.

[Versacehottie]

I never said I was trying to date on Craigslist. That's what I was trying to explain. I have not nor have I ever looked for a relationship on Craigslist.

 

I was looking for someone to give me an occasional motorcycle ride.

 

For dating I've only used pic and Yahoo personals and chat. I used yahoo like 10 years ago.

 

Also, I've done most of my dating before the fake boobs, and they are not obviously fake. Many natural women have larger breasts than me proportionately. The only guy I've dealt with after the go on job is my motorcycle friend.

 

So am I narcisstic for taking quick pics of m myself at my house? Of course, I would send a photo and they would send one back if we decided to meet. That way we know who the other person is. Where else am I going to meet motorcycle men? I'm at work on bike nights (Thursdays). Heck, I'd ride with a chic, too. Btw the guys who had motorcycles did send pics of themselves with their motorcycles. I chose CL bc it's free.

 

That's why all the people who are on there are choosing it to so it brings with it a certain calibre of guy who yeah is looking for cheap easy way to get sex because they don't have the money to date and it is fine in certain forums there to be perverse or escorts etc so it's the underbelly. A friend of mine is an undercover (female) cop to bust guys for prostitutes/john situation, posing as a "girl to date" and you know where her MAIN place that she busts people (where she poses as for looking for "dates")--Craigslist!!! That's the majority of who is using that for "dating". It's the most unregulated so there you go.

 

FYI on the "platonic" of craigslist, that's typically just an easy sell to "test" out the possibility of a relationship or more like casual hookups, no strings attached and yeah some more hooker stuff so you really need to wake up.

 

So you don't think it's odd at all that I "guessed" you might have fake boobs? See you are definitely fitting a stereotype that I have in mind that would be causing you to get a certain type of attention--yet you still don't get it.

 

I still don't think you need to send a photo if you are looking to meet motorcycle friends. People do that so they can say platonic but it's really a screening process to see if there is dating potential. And let's be honest that's exactly why you were doing it too. If I wanted to meet motorcycle friends, I would join a motorcycle group and you would have tons of new motorcycle friends men and women. There are huge groups of 20-50 people who i see riding on the weekends here in LA, up the coast, etc. If motorcycles are your thing it actually seems like they have a lot of fun and are very unified and similar lifestyle type group. It would be so much easier if you wanted to say platonic, enjoy a hobby of yours and get to know like-minded people and guys who would have a variety of reasons to be interested in you, to JOIN something like that, and target your search more effectively.

 

Whew i'm kinda tired from debating this with you. I am pretty convinced you've come here to vent and debate and whine rather than get real solutions, which is certainly what I have wanted to give you. You might want to work on the hardheaded part too because it IS how you come off. It's not attractive to interact with people the way you have on this thread and that's just another thing to add to the list of where you may be going wrong. Good luck

[LoverOfDance]

@highndry - lol, so says the man who has never spent a day in a woman's shoes.

 

I have spoken from experience. Also, please feel free to do some research. Oh and start by researching on the percentage of men who watch porn in comparison to the percentage of women who do. The results say something about the relationship a lot of men have with sex.

 

Oh and to prove my point a little further, why are more men likely and more willing to pay for sex than women are?? Why are there much more female prostitutes than male prostitutes?? Women like and need sex just as much as men do right?? Then why do men still feel the need to go to prostitutes when there are lots of women who desire sex as much as they do? Why are female prostitutes in much more high demand than male prostitutes? I would really like someone to answer this questions.

 

My theory is that a lot of men have an obsessive relationship with sex. Feel free to disagree.

Edited March 20, 2018 by LoverOfDance

[hotpotato]

That's why all the people who are on there are choosing it to so it brings with it a certain calibre of guy who yeah is looking for cheap easy way to get sex because they don't have the money to date and it is fine in certain forums there to be perverse or escorts etc so it's the underbelly. A friend of mine is an undercover (female) cop to bust guys for prostitutes/john situation, posing as a "girl to date" and you know where her MAIN place that she busts people (where she poses as for looking for "dates")--Craigslist!!! That's the majority of who is using that for "dating". It's the most unregulated so there you go.

 

FYI on the "platonic" of craigslist, that's typically just an easy sell to "test" out the possibility of a relationship or more like casual hookups, no strings attached and yeah some more hooker stuff so you really need to wake up.

 

So you don't think it's odd at all that I "guessed" you might have fake boobs? See you are definitely fitting a stereotype that I have in mind that would be causing you to get a certain type of attention--yet you still don't get it.

 

I still don't think you need to send a photo if you are looking to meet motorcycle friends. People do that so they can say platonic but it's really a screening process to see if there is dating potential. And let's be honest that's exactly why you were doing it too. If I wanted to meet motorcycle friends, I would join a motorcycle group and you would have tons of new motorcycle friends men and women. There are huge groups of 20-50 people who i see riding on the weekends here in LA, up the coast, etc. If motorcycles are your thing it actually seems like they have a lot of fun and are very unified and similar lifestyle type group. It would be so much easier if you wanted to say platonic, enjoy a hobby of yours and get to know like-minded people and guys who would have a variety of reasons to be interested in you, to JOIN something like that, and target your search more effectively.

 

Whew i'm kinda tired from debating this with you. I am pretty convinced you've come here to vent and debate and whine rather than get real solutions, which is certainly what I have wanted to give you. You might want to work on the hardheaded part too because it IS how you come off. It's not attractive to interact with people the way you have on this thread and that's just another thing to add to the list of where you may be going wrong. Good luck

To reiterate

 

I DID NOT GO ON CRAIGSLIST TO DATE.

 

Also, you didn't guess I have fake boobs. I've made threads on it, and I and others have mentioned it in other threads. I didn't want to live life with a flat chest and tuberous breasts, sue me.

 

You've already made up my your mind about me, that I go around lips pouting, flirting with guys then complain that I get attention. In fact, I'm very introverted and spend a lot of my time alone doing things like reading and writing. I've made threads in the past about how much I like being alone. Go out to eat by myself, walks at night and 5am to be by myself. Why am I purposefully avoiding people if I want all this attention???

 

I've spent most of my adult years walking around in muumuus.

 

Ok so tell me, where do I meet guys who ride motorcycles if I can't make it to bike night? Other than co or motorcycle dating sites (which I didnt use bc I don't want to date), where do I look? CL wasn't ideal, but either that or hope ups,will deliver a biker to my doorstep.

 

Also, I LIVE IN A SMALL RURALISH TOWN NOT LA. There are not bikers everywhere waiting for a higher. I've already told you repeatedly that we have biker nights but I can't attend BC THEY ARE ON THURSDAY NIGHTS WHEN I WORK.

 

You missed the point of this thread. I never asked how to get a date how to get a I'd or anything like that in this thread.

 

 

Stop being presumptuous about what you think is going on in my head. Unless you can read my mind, you read my emails, etc etc don't act like you know everything about me.

 

Also, again if I want a man I DO NOT HAVE TO GO ON CL.I would go on a site that is geared (or at least advertised as such) as being for dating or meet people in person. Last year was the only time I ever used craigslist for anything.

Edited March 20, 2018 by hotpotato

[Versacehottie]

I did guess. I have never read any of your other threads.

 

So what is the point of this thread? Wanting to know if anyone else has felt this way? No, haven't and that is what the majority of the responses you have gotten have been telling you.

Edited March 20, 2018 by Versacehottie

[hotpotato]

I did guess. I have never read any of your other threads.

 

So what is the point of this thread? Wanting to know if anyone else has felt this way? No, haven't and that is what the majority of the responses you have gotten have been telling you.

 

Someone just mentioned it in one of my other threads. I've been posting about getting boobs for years. Also,I've been called pretty and gorgeous,without the boobs. I don't need boobs for attention. Maybe I didn't want traffic cones for breasts. Most guys never see me anyway bc I'm up early and late. HA.

 

Please read the original post. Thanks.

[Gaeta]

OP: Through this thread we tried to make you self-analyze a bit and to recognize that maybe you could change a few things in the way you present yourself and the type of men you pick. We were not able to break through to you. You walk around with blinders and unwilling look inward for your answers. All of our answers are within us, as long as you refuse to 'humble' yourself and look within you won't know why this is happening to you.

 

I don't know if you are young but you sound young and naive. Putting a full picture of you on Craiglist seeking a bike buddy is not only naive but extremely dangerous. You are sending all types of 'wrong messages' to men and you refuse to acknowledge it. It could lead you to life threatening situations some day.

 

As to answer your question YES there was a time when I was dating I was attracting only men that wanted sex. Why? It was because of the way I presented my self and it was also because of the poor choice of men I was making. I was very attractive, I had a lot of attention when online, I had men 10-15 years younger chasing me and I felt flattered by all that attention. After 2-3 years of this I had a serious look at how I was responsible for this and I made changes....and I finally met my boyfriend.

[hotpotato]

I think one person understood the purpose of this thread.

[hotpotato]

OP: Through this thread we tried to make you self-analyze a bit and to recognize that maybe you could change a few things in the way you present yourself and the type of men you pick. We were not able to break through to you. You walk around with blinders and unwilling look inward for your answers. All of our answers are within us, as long as you refuse to 'humble' yourself and look within you won't know why this is happening to you.

 

I don't know if you are young but you sound young and naive. Putting a full picture of you on Craiglist seeking a bike buddy is not only naive but extremely dangerous. You are sending all types of 'wrong messages' to men and you refuse to acknowledge it. It could lead you to life threatening situations some day.

 

As to answer your question YES there was a time when I was dating I was attracting only men that wanted sex. Why? It was because of the way I presented my self and it was also because of the poor choice of men I was making. I was very attractive, I had a lot of attention when online, I had men 10-15 years younger chasing me and I felt flattered by all that attention. After 2-3 years of this I had a serious look at how I was responsible for this and I made changes....and I finally met my boyfriend.

 

That's not what I asked in this thread.

 

This isn't my first rodeo. I know to meet people in person first before I go off with them.

 

Just to let everyone know, yes, I can get a boyfriend. I could have a relationship with my motorcycle friend, but I don't want to.

 

Most of the things in this thread aren't revelations. We have already discussed these things in other threads.

[hotpotato]

This thread is about me not wanting to date.

 

I've already figured put useful things like making sure there's distance between myself and the guy in one way or another. I've also found it much better to date guys who are also into the fitness lifestyle. I have better luck when my standards go up than when they go down. So there.

[Gaeta]

Does or has anyone else felt this way?

 

I realize I am exhausted from dating and the bs. I'm 31. I feel like I should want to date, but I don't. I just don't miss it.

 

I don't miss being asked for sex on almost every first date

I don't miss invitations to watch a movie, or talk, or whatever then he tries to have sex with me. This hasn't just happened at the guys house either...

 

Tbh I'm not sexually interested in most men in a way that would make me want to have sex with them instantly. Even if i were, I don't necessarily feel a need to act upon it.

 

I grew tired of trying to sort out the phonies. I've had guys pretend they wanted to be my boyfriend because they wanted sex (they'd admit it after awhile).

 

Dating seems to me like it's mostly about having sex. I've had very few men even try to get to know me. Then id get a boyfriend and get dumped anyway. *shrug*

 

In 2015 I had several guys who were interested in me or I in them without meeting them on the internet. That was a fluke. Otherwise I don't meet many prospects. That's starting to feel like a blessing.

 

I did find a motorcycle pal which was a battle in itself.

 

Your first sentence is exhausted from dating, You sure say *date* a lot for a thread not about dating.

 

The way I understood it you are exhausted from dating because.....ABC. We told you how to avoid that.

[d0nnivain]

HotPotato

 

First I went from page 1 to this page so I skipped the middle pages.

 

What I understand is that you are an attractive person who has done things to enhance her appearance because you wanted to. Good for you.

 

You are also tired of meeting men who "only want one thing." That is totally understandable. You want a relationship not just sex.

 

I agree with those who say you are the common denominator so you do have to do a frank personal analysis to determine if you are getting the same results because you are doing the same thing. I had to do that & it was painful. I am what many would call an Alpha Female. Not only can I compete with men, I often best them. I wanted to be Top Dog in all aspects of my life & wore that competitive outlook as a suit of armor. As a result I attracted more than my share of cocky guys who were only interested in conquest & who weren't very nice people. The combo didn't make for loving interactions or soothing emotional connections. I realized I had to change. I had to let my guard down & be more laid back, letting the guy take the lead. When I set out to get serious & find a man to marry, I prayed for a man "strong enough to let me be weak" but I proverbially sat on my hands in the beginning as a way to determine if the new guy had the leadership skills I'd need to sustain a relationship. It wasn't always easy & felt counter to my personality but it worked. I found DH, a quiet, reserved Marine Vet who is truly one of the strongest people I know.

 

So I suggest you take a little bit of a break from dating, maybe until the beginning of the summer. Meanwhile, think about the qualities you want in a partner. Also understand what you bring to the table & where you could improve.

 

One of the other suggestions I followed was to write letters to my future husband, talking about his qualities, his personality, how we interact, & "dreaming" of all the things we'd do together. For you those would include motorcycle rides. You address the letters generically Dear Darling or something like that. It's important to date them. You write them, then put them in an envelope & put the envelopes in a drawer. When I gave these letters to my husband about a week after we returned from our HM, he was shocked at how much they could have been written to him, as if I knew him years before we met.

 

I realize that suggestion is a bit kooky but it helped me to clarify my thoughts. I credit it in part to leading me to DH.

 

 

So give yourself a short rest. Do not compromise who you are. Happy hunting.

[MaleIntuition]

This thread is about me not wanting to date.

 

I've already figured put useful things like making sure there's distance between myself and the guy in one way or another. I've also found it much better to date guys who are also into the fitness lifestyle. I have better luck when my standards go up than when they go down. So there.

 

Well, this is a dating forum, not a “not dating” forum; which explained our inclination to discuss the reason to your present state of “not wanting to date” - which you (by the way), just contradicted by listing a couple of criteria for your future dates.

[SmartDude]

I would say your smarter than the average girl. Im reading through some of the threads in this post, and my jaw is on the floor. People do not understand you.

 

Being by yourself is actually fun, Im doing that right now as a matter of fact. I wake up in the morning and simply decide what I want to do each and every day. I don't wake up in the morning and right away think about coordinating with 1 or more people(family), and our combined needs and wants. Its kind of nice. There are some people who actually prefer this lifestyle, maybe you ARE one of them, its ok if that is the truth.

 

So what if you take a break, but just kind of date once in a while as an afterthought. Or just don't date, but if you meet someone by chance, maybe you will just try it out for a little while. I think it is healthy to take the focus off dating sometimes. Will you get stuck there? Maybe, but it might not be so bad, and it is not going to last forever.

[hotpotato]

I would say your smarter than the average girl. Im reading through some of the threads in this post, and my jaw is on the floor. People do not understand you.

 

Being by yourself is actually fun, Im doing that right now as a matter of fact. I wake up in the morning and simply decide what I want to do each and every day. I don't wake up in the morning and right away think about coordinating with 1 or more people(family), and our combined needs and wants. Its kind of nice. There are some people who actually prefer this lifestyle, maybe you ARE one of them, its ok if that is the truth.

 

So what if you take a break, but just kind of date once in a while as an afterthought. Or just don't date, but if you meet someone by chance, maybe you will just try it out for a little while. I think it is healthy to take the focus off dating sometimes. Will you get stuck there? Maybe, but it might not be so bad, and it is not going to last forever.

 

Thank you!

 

I agree, doing what you want, when you want is nice! It's very easy to get used to it.

 

I'm afraid if I take a break, I'll get too used to being alone. I'm arguably too used to being alone now lol I'm scared my life is getting too good without a man.

 

 

Sometimes when I want to be alone I get asked out a lot. One guy asked me out we deal times, and I said no. I felt bad for him. That being said I don't go on pity date.

[hotpotato]

Your first sentence is exhausted from dating, You sure say *date* a lot for a thread not about dating.

 

The way I understood it you are exhausted from dating because.....ABC. We told you how to avoid that.

 

You basically told me not to date hotties bc they'll want only sex, yet most of the men who wanted only sex were far from hotties. That doesn't make sense. Thats what I'm not understanding from you.

 

I understand you have your experiences. However, I've met men who were wonderful inside and out as well as men who were unattractive or average but we're liars or severely oversexed.

 

Maybe I can't avoid guys coming onto me strong. I had a random guy come up to me and offer sex. I was wearing a muumuus and at the movies with my popcorn. I had a guy I met in person try to force himself onto me in a fitting room. I had a guy say I was being sexy for him bc I was wearing athletic shorts while walking the park during a heat index of 90°.

 

I did say that maybe on dates I was being friendly was being misconstrued as being sexual. I am not on dates being overly sexual, wearing red lipstick and 6 inch stilettos, or anything like that.