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Should I stop talking to this girl I went on a date with?


Oladeji123

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I would need more in the way of details to give a reasoned reply.

 

How long have you been chatting, how often, what were the plans for the Saturday date and what conversations did you have leading up to the reschedule?

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This is a college girl. You know how many boys are around campus for her to meet everyday? Why is she even online dating? It's for fun (until she finds a guy she falls for). It's a different mindset from the 30 year old woman who's ready for marriage. I wouldn't apply all the same rules, just as a 65 year old dating online is a whole other thing.. So she plays by different rules because she can take it or leave it as far as meeting random men online. But doesn't mean she won't fall in love.

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I would need more in the way of details to give a reasoned reply.

 

How long have you been chatting, how often, what were the plans for the Saturday date and what conversations did you have leading up to the reschedule?

 

Well weve been talking for about a month now..when i met her online, she was out of the country so we couldnt meet then, but we would be talking every single day..sometimes late at night..she would be carrying on the convo and asking about me etc..we then moved onto facebook and we would talk regularyl even though i started the convos, her answers were usually lengthy and it seemed as though she probably at least was interested in me from the way the conversations would go.

 

Our plans for the date was to just meet up for coffee but she later sugested that she could take me to a couple of bookstores she thinks i will love..we both love reading. Shes even said that she would bring one of her books shes currently reading for me to borrow. When she rescheduled, she was the one that started off the convo and simply told me that she hopes i dont hate her but she would like to reschedule the date for monday or tuesday..she didnt tell me why straightaway but i told her tuesday was good and she seemed happy and even apologised again. I ended the conversation and told her i would talk to her on monday..havent spoken to her since.

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This is a college girl. You know how many boys are around campus for her to meet everyday? Why is she even online dating? It's for fun (until she finds a guy she falls for). It's a different mindset from the 30 year old woman who's ready for marriage. I wouldn't apply all the same rules, just as a 65 year old dating online is a whole other thing.. So she plays by different rules because she can take it or leave it as far as meeting random men online. But doesn't mean she won't fall in love.

 

That may be true, but she also made it seem from our conversations that these universtiy guys are the non patient ones that shes had schedulieng conflicts with

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So i just went on a date with a girl i met online..It was fun and we talked a lot throughout the day.. We spent about 4 hours together.. Most of the conversations revolved around her but she still occasionally asked me questions ...she took me to a bookstore because she knew i liked books and i thought she would ask me what kind of books i wanted to check out but she just took me to all the kind of books she likes to read...it was interesting as it gave me a better idea of the kind of girl she is and she seemed like she really wanted to show me what got her excited and maybe wanted to see how i felt about those kinds of books...but it sucked that she didnt take me to the sections with books i would be interested in.. She showed signs of interest at times, e.g. playing with her hair a lot, although it could just be a habit...She also touched me a number of times, when she would be talking about how guys are at the club and she would touch me around my shoulders and arms..so i know she was definitely comfortable with me. And at the ned of the day, we walked back to her apartment..she had stated about giving me a book to borrow about a week ago so i thought id bring it up jokingly..she then told me to come into her apartment. When i was in her room, the atmosphere just became really awkward...she said she had fun...but the way she looked, she appeared almost shy or unsure of what was gonna happen next in there...i felt she probably wanted me to go lol..she came up to me and hugged me and everything just felt awkward so i just left...i texted her when i got home just say how much i enjoyed the day but she hadnt replied..its been about 4-5 hours

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The only thing I can deduce from this is that she's a bubbly person who likes to talk about herself and shows little interest in others.

 

Don't set too much store in her yet.

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You can definitely tell if somebody doesn't like but her behavior on this date was odd. I found it particularly interesting that she brought you back to her apartment. That was probably unwise from a safety perspective. Not that you are a bad person but since she met you off OLD she doesn't really know that.

 

All you can do is ask for a 2nd date.

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I think the both of you changed the atmosphere in the room lol Like omg here we are...alone in her room.....

 

Ask her out again....this time say good-bye at the door unless you two are pawing all over each other. Then going to her room won't be so awkward lol

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newyorker11356
Physical contact is usually the best indicator of whether or not a girl is into you. Does she look for reasons to touch you? Even just little things like touching your hand, your arm, hugging you, etc.

 

I don't think this always means anything. Some women aren't into a whole lot of touching and stuff, especially early on.

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she appeared almost shy or unsure of what was gonna happen next in there...i felt she probably wanted me to go lol..she came up to me and hugged me and everything just felt awkward so i just left

 

She invited you up to her apartment, into her room, she even took the initiative to approach and hug you....

 

It sounds like she wanted you to make a move.

 

If she hasn’t replied, my guess is that she was expecting more from you (physically) and may feel a bit disappointed or embarassed.

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She invited you to her apartment after a date when she was touching you a lot.

 

She was waiting for you to make the move, you were insecure, it was awkward, the whole mood changed, left her feeling really crappy because you didn't take control of the situation and act like the man she wanted you to be.

 

Next time you gotta go for the kiss and anything else that goes along with it until and unless she signals otherwise.

 

Might be too late for this one, so learn from it.

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I don't think this always means anything. Some women aren't into a whole lot of touching and stuff, especially early on.

 

For me it always has. Any woman who touched me always ended up making out with me at the end (or during) of the date.

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For me it always has. Any woman who touched me always ended up making out with me at the end (or during) of the date.

 

I would say that repeated touching is a strong indicator of attraction

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I would say that repeated touching is a strong indicator of attraction

 

That's been my experience.

 

But I sort of misread the post. I think what the person said wad just because they don’t touch doesn’t mean they are not into you. I would agree.

 

But repeatedly touching is definitely a sign of interest.

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You can definitely tell if somebody doesn't like but her behavior on this date was odd. I found it particularly interesting that she brought you back to her apartment. That was probably unwise from a safety perspective. Not that you are a bad person but since she met you off OLD she doesn't really know that.

 

All you can do is ask for a 2nd date.

 

yeahhh i think she probably realized that which is why things felt weird in her apartment

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I think the both of you changed the atmosphere in the room lol Like omg here we are...alone in her room.....

 

Ask her out again....this time say good-bye at the door unless you two are pawing all over each other. Then going to her room won't be so awkward lol

 

Lol true, i did stand at the door at first but she sort of signalled me to come in which i did haha

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Physical contact is usually the best indicator of whether or not a girl is into you. Does she look for reasons to touch you? Even just little things like touching your hand, your arm, hugging you, etc.

 

Well she did touch me several times throughout when she was talking about how guys act around her...rather than just telling me, she was touch me and showing me exaclty what they did

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She invited you up to her apartment, into her room, she even took the initiative to approach and hug you....

 

It sounds like she wanted you to make a move.

 

If she hasn’t replied, my guess is that she was expecting more from you (physically) and may feel a bit disappointed or embarassed.

 

Shes not replied to my text...on her online dating profile, she said she would have sex in 3-5 dates so i didnt want to make a move on the first date..

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She invited you to her apartment after a date when she was touching you a lot.

 

She was waiting for you to make the move, you were insecure, it was awkward, the whole mood changed, left her feeling really crappy because you didn't take control of the situation and act like the man she wanted you to be.

 

Next time you gotta go for the kiss and anything else that goes along with it until and unless she signals otherwise.

 

Might be too late for this one, so learn from it.

 

But she stated on her profile online that she would only have sex between 3-5 dates..so i didn't think she was expecting anything to happen there..

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yeahhh i think she probably realized that which is why things felt weird in her apartment

 

No the mood changed in her apartment because you were awkward, unsure & hesitant.

 

Shes not replied to my text...on her online dating profile, she said she would have sex in 3-5 dates so i didnt want to make a move on the first date..

 

Honey, she lied. She was open to 1st date something. . . . at least a serious make out session.

 

I know you think you were being respectful. She thinks you rejected her or that you are gay.

 

Do reach out & ask her for a 2nd date but for heaven's sake at least greet her with a kiss on the cheek

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No the mood changed in her apartment because you were awkward, unsure & hesitant.

 

 

 

Honey, she lied. She was open to 1st date something. . . . at least a serious make out session.

 

I know you think you were being respectful. She thinks you rejected her or that you are gay.

 

Do reach out & ask her for a 2nd date but for heaven's sake at least greet her with a kiss on the cheek

 

Dammm it!! Now that i think about, when she came in to hug me, i could have done something then...even my hug wasnt a full one compared to hers...i not a huggy kind of guy. Ill be seeing her again as i have her book. I just hope i havent ruined things already..i honestly felt that she wanted to take things slowly and just see how things went between us over time

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Shes not replied to my text...on her online dating profile, she said she would have sex in 3-5 dates so i didnt want to make a move on the first date..

 

If she's touching you a lot that's her making a move. That was time for you to make yours. If she pushes you back when you try something, then you've found the boundary. Which isn't a bad sign.. in fact if you then respect that boundary that's almost a good sign for her (you're willing to listen to her).

 

In any case, ask her out for a 2nd date. Her response will actually answer your original question. :D

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If she's touching you a lot that's her making a move. That was time for you to make yours. If she pushes you back when you try something, then you've found the boundary. Which isn't a bad sign.. in fact if you then respect that boundary that's almost a good sign for her (you're willing to listen to her).

 

In any case, ask her out for a 2nd date. Her response will actually answer your original question. :D

 

Well i borrowed a book from her so i will have to meet her again...when should i ask her out on a second date. How long do i wait?

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Shes not replied to my text...on her online dating profile, she said she would have sex in 3-5 dates so i didnt want to make a move on the first date..

 

Ummm, am I the only one that’s shocked by this?

 

Maybe it’s an age thing, but I’ve never seen a profile of a chick who gave a timeline for sex.

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