How would you react if i told you that...to a certain degree I was afraid of women?

[Woggle]

So should i just do my best to avoid those that are particularly uptight?

 

Get to know the people around you. You should know whether or not a woman is the type to go to HR over a joke and if the situation should arise and you are innocent fight it. When my ex accused me I didn't back down one bit and I won.

[CptInsano]

[...]

I would like to hear some first hand experiences from people who HAVE been accused by women for things that they did not do in the work place.

 

I don't think it is as rampant as portrayed here by many men, who seem to be sharing "what if" stories, rather than actual accounts.

 

Well, I have not been accused individually, but as part of the management team of my department. None of these claims were related to sexual harassment, but usually some form of employment discrimination. (Keep in mind that these forms of employment were in economically depressed areas where the labor costs were low, which in turn also influenced the the labor force.)

 

The most common ones were for racial bias, with a smattering of others. My favorite one was a case where they claimed we discriminated against people with a particular autoimmune disease, which was in that particular case non-symptomatic.

 

None of these cases went anywhere.

[RecentChange]

None of these claims were related to sexual harassment, but usually some form of employment discrimination.

The most common ones were for racial bias, with a smattering of others. My favorite one was a case where they claimed we discriminated against people with a particular autoimmune disease

 

Gotcha - but none of that sounds specific to women, or the #metoo movement, or that over sensitive women have made the work place a nightmare for men.

[CptInsano]

Gotcha - but none of that sounds specific to women, or the #metoo movement, or that over sensitive women have made the work place a nightmare for men.

 

No, but that was my point earlier: Corporate policy generally goes further anyhow, and has been for quite a while. Most male employees have been "in compliance" in that regard already. Outside of work the metoo-campaign is on the other hand of little relevance, unless you are a celebrity or otherwise exposed person.

[basil67]

Get to know the people around you. You should know whether or not a woman is the type to go to HR over a joke and if the situation should arise and you are innocent fight it. When my ex accused me I didn't back down one bit and I won.

 

This ^ If you really want to behave inappropriately at work, you need to know how to read people. Figure out those who won't be offended and save that behaviour for them.

 

That said, given that you're worried about it all, I fear that you don't have the skills to figure out who's cool and who's not. We're certainly not in the 20th century anymore and taking care of yourself is first priority.

[jay1983]

Yeah I don't know... I haven't experiences this "nightmare" that is the result of the #metoo movement.

 

I work in a professional environment. There are no sexual jokes. There are no sarcastic jabs, there is no inappropriate touching.

 

Now, I understand a warehouse situtation, or a construction yard may be different, because, perhaps codes of conduct are not so clearly understood and adhered to.

 

But in my life, do I go out to lunch with my male manager? Yep!

 

Do we all go out to drinks? Yep! Might I have a drink with my manager while the rest of the party arrives... you bet.

 

Now - he has the sense to not invite a person from the office out to drinks - I do the same. I don't invite one on one drinking with any of my coworkers. We are coworkers, not drinking buddies.

 

And as a married woman, I do not think my husband would be thrilled with me going out to drinks with a man from work, and I wouldn't be thrilled with him going out to drinks with a woman he worked with.

 

I don't think that is too unusual.

 

Again, its understanding social norms and adhering to them.

 

I would like to hear some first hand experiences from people who HAVE been accused by women for things that they did not do in the work place.

 

I don't think it is as rampant as portrayed here by many men, who seem to be sharing "what if" stories, rather than actual accounts.

 

About ten years ago I worked in retail. A coworker who I had lunch with went to HR and said I was sexually harassing her. The GM called me to the office and told me i was terminated. My ass got saved by the assistant manager (also a woman) who stepped and spoke about what was going on. The girl had something going with someone she worked with at another store. She was real flirty and assertive. They ended up just transferring her to another store again.

 

Working in a office I've seen one guy get let go for sexual harassment. Whether or not he was guilty, I don't know, but they let him go without any proof or anything. Their was a girl I worked with who would threaten to call HR if she didn't like something. One day i say something and she threatens me with HR. This was over a comment I made letting her know that she missed a button on her shirt and bra was showing. I respond telling her I'd fill HR in on some things she said about people on food stamps that greatly offended me. Things get dirty I really don't wanna work with people like that.

 

When you work people you spend all day with them and start to get comfortable amd develop something like a friendship. It's really hard to stay 100% professional at all times. Like if I worked with you and thought you were a cool person, I'd be inclined to have a drink with you or spark up a little green.