What do men find attractive

[Mr.Me]

What I want and what I can get are not coinciding.

 

I used to say I was attracted to manipulative [women] cause that's all I ever dated so I changed what I liked.

 

I want smart, funny, active, engaged in life, pretty.

 

Apparently I have nothing going for me.

 

Isn't is funny how what we think we want and what we end up with very seldom match up?

Edited December 31, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Merge and edit for language

[MeadowFlower]

And now you see why men answer that question the way we do. Can't be completely honest when we are asked questions like this.

 

 

 

Your value may very well not be the shape of your butt, but that is likely what makes men want to be with you. Just as so many people on this site like to say, there has to be some attraction. Otherwise, that wonderful mind of yours is just enough to put you firmly in the friendzone.

I actually disagree with that last sentence. From a woman's perspective, a friendship is what can lead to having feelings for someone. There probably are deeper men out there too who aren't so primeval to be focused on merely a body.

[Eternal Sunshine]

There is some truth to this. Generally speaking, men make their own way in life so we don't care if a woman is all that responsible or makes a lot of money. Just want a cute girl that is a pleasure to be around.

 

The polar opposite of the girl you describe might be an overweight, older and established, but a boring and bitter woman that no one wants to spend significant time with. That is something that I see time and time again.

 

From a man's perspective, why do you think we would make the choice we make?

 

Yeah, I see your point but I wish men valued intelligence, loyalty and kindness more than superficial entertaiment. It also kind of sucks that men are so focused on youth since men are also much less attractive as they age. I find it hard to find men around 40 that are in decent shape and don't look like my dad.

[Els]

Yeah, I see your point but I wish men valued intelligence, loyalty and kindness more than superficial entertaiment

 

There are men who do, although they are probably not the majority. But then, as they say, you only need one.

 

I also think that it's a spectrum rather than a binary choice. Most people (of either gender), probably need some degree of physical appearance or "superficial entertainment" to form attraction. But people vary hugely in how much importance they place on it, and how rigid their preferences are.

[Chilli]

Funny , don't think this one will be mentioned yet but you know what l really , really , love.

A few guys will probly cringe at this one

 

When l go to use the bathroom and she's got make up and creams and perfumes and body sprays and make up, nail stuff anything and everything - EVERYWHERE !!!!

l love it.

lt's always just so well , girl, feminine .

Always makes me feel like she loves smelling nice and looking nice and looking after herself, just so girlie , love it.

 

lf l go into the bathroom and there's nothing, just one lonely jar of cream or spray or something, l think wtf , not very girlie.

Go figure.

 

My ex w and daughter always have the bathroom smothered in there stuff, maybe it's just from that who knows.

Edited January 1, 2018 by Chilli

[road]

Yeah, I see your point but I wish men valued intelligence, loyalty and kindness more than superficial entertaiment. It also kind of sucks that men are so focused on youth since men are also much less attractive as they age. I find it hard to find men around 40 that are in decent shape and don't look like my dad.

 

There is all kinds of smart. Being able to get advanced degrees

or even a BS degree does not mean common sense smart.

Does not guarantee making good decisions, being faithful.

Nor does it mean a woman will handle personal finances well.

 

It seems women posters use the word intelligence to indicate

at least a 4 year degree and a high paying career.

 

That form of intelligence does not transfer over to guarantying

a woman will be a good wife. Though it implies that when she

gets divorced her husband will not have to pay support is about

that guarantees.

[carhill]

I was watching my favorite gas turbine engine YouTube channel yesterday and the publisher brought in a vintage jet engine expert to help him remove the mid-frame bearing from a J79 (powered the F4 Phantom, among many other military aircraft). The expert was a woman! And she was pretty darned hot! I thought maybe it was a ringer but nah, she was working the specialized tooling like a boss! Now that's attractive, baseball cap and pony tail and all. Like mentioned, intelligence comes in many forms. Keeping tens of thousands of parts flying in formation at the speed of sound takes smarts.

 

Anyway, happy new year and one more anecdote from the old guy.

[jjgitties]

Given the abundance of people with long lists of unrealistic requirements and expectations of partners on this site, I will I will start my own for 2018.

 

The list of qualities I am looking for in a woman:

- she has to have a face like a cross between Raquel Welch and Tuesday Weld

- she has to have a body like a yoga instructor but also a bit hippie type

- she has to be into art films -- Fellini, Anotioni, Kurasawa .. none of that chick flick Julia Roberts romantic comedy cr@p

- she has to love the outdoors and trail running in -20 degree weather

- she has to be into skiing

 

While we are at it, might as well throw in this one..

- she has to be into progressive rock and blues music. none of that Michael Bubble / Harry Connick Jr. cr@p

 

 

Happy new year all.

[Mysterio]

Current Criteria for a Woman Romantically is the following for me in 2018.

 

I am looking to settle down so if this relationship goes beyond 8 weeks Here is wear I am at. No heavy expectations other than getting together and after 2 months or BF/GF or brake up

 

Single/Widowed/Divorced.

 

Separated-There needs to be a timeframe of Divorce Finality for me to really invest in her. There will be no bio kids between us or living together until that haopens. At best she would be a friend.

 

Sex-this is tricky. It depends on how we groove. Birth Control on both sides whenever it happens.

 

At this time in my life at age 46. I don't think I want kids. It could change. Depending on how the Woman and I really click. If she has on kid at home fine. I don't know if I could do the 3 to 5 kids. I don't think I could handle that. Unless they were all out of the house.

 

Her Age Range. 27 to 54 loose range. A tighter fit would be 33 to 49.

 

Ethnicity-Does not matter. Gong by my pattern. Mixed/Caucasian/Black.

 

Work-Hopefully she makes good money for her self. Healthcare is stable.

 

Dress wise. I love women that are more on the Bohemian/Hippie side.

 

Height- 5'5 to 5'9, but does it really matter

 

Weight-In fit shape. She can be a little heavy or lithe.

 

Hair colour-Love Red Heads/Brunet/Brown/Blonde in that order. Long hair that can be tied up is a turn on as well.

 

Spiritually minded.

 

Eye colour- no preference.

 

Personality-Soft and kind/humours/affectionate/Playfull. Sharp and quick witted.

 

Now my prefernce is mutable. One can't get all those factors.

 

If had to use a character in the movies or an actress. I would say Sara Jessica Parker from Sex in the City. Not so much her character. More like her real life persona is the type of woman I gravitiate to. Actress Kate Walsh/Susan Sarandon.

 

Bottom line a woman that also is willing to do the leg work with me as well.

[heartbrokenlady]

There is all kinds of smart. Being able to get advanced degrees

or even a BS degree does not mean common sense smart.

Does not guarantee making good decisions, being faithful.

Nor does it mean a woman will handle personal finances well.

 

It seems women posters use the word intelligence to indicate

at least a 4 year degree and a high paying career.

 

That form of intelligence does not transfer over to guarantying

a woman will be a good wife. Though it implies that when she

gets divorced her husband will not have to pay support is about

that guarantees.

 

 

And when a woman DOES have those good qualities, 1) If she isn't young, thin and hot, an average educated guy will not be interested. 2) If she's educated and got good life skills, she probably wants someone on a similar level. Not a guy wanting to be mothered.

[heartbrokenlady]

Given the abundance of people with long lists of unrealistic requirements and expectations of partners on this site, I will I will start my own for 2018.

 

The list of qualities I am looking for in a woman:

- she has to have a face like a cross between Raquel Welch and Tuesday Weld

- she has to have a body like a yoga instructor but also a bit hippie type

- she has to be into art films -- Fellini, Anotioni, Kurasawa .. none of that chick flick Julia Roberts romantic comedy cr@p

- she has to love the outdoors and trail running in -20 degree weather

- she has to be into skiing

 

While we are at it, might as well throw in this one..

- she has to be into progressive rock and blues music. none of that Michael Bubble / Harry Connick Jr. cr@p

 

 

Happy new year all.

 

 

 

 

Good luck with that list jjgitties. What % chance do you think you stand of finding it in a woman that wants to be with you?

[elaine567]

Good luck with that list jjgitties. What % chance do you think you stand of finding it in a woman that wants to be with you?

 

Ok but he seems to have forgotten he is still married, unless he got a divorce over the holidays of course.

[wmacbride]

There is all kinds of smart. Being able to get advanced degrees

or even a BS degree does not mean common sense smart.

Does not guarantee making good decisions, being faithful.

Nor does it mean a woman will handle personal finances well.

 

It seems women posters use the word intelligence to indicate

at least a 4 year degree and a high paying career.

 

That form of intelligence does not transfer over to guarantying

a woman will be a good wife. Though it implies that when she

gets divorced her husband will not have to pay support is about

that guarantees.

 

My oldest is drop dead gorgeous ( could be a twin to a well known model), is extremely intelligent, creative, independent, hardworking and loyal to a fault.

 

She would also be, and she has said this herself, a terrible candidate for a romantic relationship. She would drive her partner away because for all her wonderful qualities, the dynamics that make romantic relationships work elude her.