Author amazonrambo Posted October 24, 2017 Author Share Posted October 24, 2017 OP, I don't think you did anything wrong at all! Her text indicated to me that she's used to guys who communicate and text a lot before meeting in person. In my experience, a lot of guys are happy to talk for weeks before asking to meet. I personally found that annoying; I guess some women like it. How long was it from the time you started talking to her to when you asked her out? If your last communication with her was on Friday morning, I don't think there is anything wrong with not reaching out until Sunday morning to confirm the date on the day of like you did. I'm kind of surprised that so many women would expect daily communication with a guy who they've never even met! At any rate, I would've showed up on Sunday night after making plans on Thursday night. It's three days. Sheesh. (I could see if it was a week, but three days and over the weekend? Most people are busy.) To me, it would be weird to make plans on Thursday night and then have the guy ask Saturday if we were still on. Like...yeah...of course we are. That would seem really insecure to me. It's been a day and a half since we made the plan! Dating expectations are so weird nowadays. This all could be a big sign of texting incompatibility for the two of you; you aren't a big texter and she apparently is. But, text her today with something to appease her before your date tomorrow, and we'll see if she shows up or chickens out again. We spoke on the dating website then she gave me her number and I texted her the following evening (Thursday) where we sent around 3 texts each to each other before I made the date. It's not like I was playing games. I was working 10-12 hour days on Thursday, Friday and Saturday plus a smaller working day on the Sunday. My focus was primarily on my job. Afaik the date was planned so I was leaving all the communication until then and focusing on my job in that moment. Link to post Share on other sites
Author amazonrambo Posted October 24, 2017 Author Share Posted October 24, 2017 (edited) Proven by whom? It didn't work this time, clearly. Proven by every guy who has used it.. It did work this time, because I walked away and told her to get back to me when she's free and she did? I set the date and she agreed, even if there's a 100% chance she's going to flake again, the fact is I walked away instead of begging for her attention or a date, like most guys would do. It's an attractive move, but attraction is a choice and his work doesn't magically attract women who aren't interested. It's about walking away as the MAN, confident and un-needy. His work tells you how to not waste your time on uninterested women but acting confident about it, saying "If you're free another time let me know", etc so it keeps things open for the future, but you walk away as a confident, un-needy person. So yes his work has proven to work, because I walked away unaffected and the door is open if she's willing to meet. I've not shown neediness, I've been direct with what I want which is to meet. That's what his work PROMOTES. About going for what you want. That doesn't mean you're going to get every woman using his methods, but it makes you look far much more like a man than what most guys would do. Until you read his book, you can't really understand. It's about self-improvement, not a "magic tool" to pick up any woman. His whole methods revolve around focusing on yourself and your drive in life, being able to walk away if a girl isn't willing to meet YOUR terms in arranging a date. Edited October 24, 2017 by amazonrambo 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author amazonrambo Posted October 24, 2017 Author Share Posted October 24, 2017 (edited) Yes. Not this time or with Op ex. Or apparently with corey wayne's own ex wife. You realise he broke up with his ex wife because she had to move back to the UK so distance was a problem for them. I had to break up with my ex because she kept mentioning her ex boyfriend and it annoyed me, that plus working when she was free lead to problems. Please research into his work about what he teaches because I feel you're misunderstanding it, he teaches about self improvingm, being able to walk away from uninterested women (not wasting your time), how to determine interest levels, how to set direct dates (when most guys would use texting to talk a lot which lowers attraction). It's not supposed to be used as a magic tool to attract any women, because it's impossible for every person to like you. It's about being confident whether you face rejection or not, how to not lose focus on your main purpose in life, etc. Edited October 24, 2017 by amazonrambo 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author amazonrambo Posted October 24, 2017 Author Share Posted October 24, 2017 I think this woman's reaction is typical of what he will find on the dating market and if he wants to up his chances he needs to get with the program. Obviously there are more women wanting some type of contact before a first meet or in between the first couple of meets. The whys have been explained. He said she replied Friday morning to her Thursday text, doesn't sound he replied to her that Friday. OP DID you reply to her Friday? If he didn't think her text Friday warranted a reply then she heard from him Thursday, she text him Friday with no reply and doesn't hear from him till on day of the date? That would not sit well with a lot of women. The methods I go by fully work with women I meet in person who I ask for their number, because they've at least seen me in person. But for online dating, maybe I need to adjust my ways before the first date so they can meet me, then return back to my usual methods of communication. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author amazonrambo Posted October 24, 2017 Author Share Posted October 24, 2017 (Female here) OP's actions were fine. He texted her Friday and then again Sunday morning for a Sunday night date. How much more contact is needed for a FIRST meet? This woman is either flaky, disinterested, or entitled. I'm going with all three. I decided to delete her number, the conversation and move on because I have no time for women like that. I'll only go after women who at least show similar efforts to meet up. I sent this girl a text earlier today asking if our blind date was still on for tomorrow night, which was 8 hours ago and I got no reply so I will not be wasting my time getting ready tomorrow. Especially when she's been "online" on the dating website this past hour. I have no time for disrespect like that Onwards and upwards 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 AmazonRambo Please realize that the PUA stuff from Corey Wayne & every guru like him is not to be taken any more literally then The Rules, which was a popular dating book / set of instructions for women. These are supposed to be guidelines designed to enable insecure people to stop prostrating themselves before every member of the opposite sex who comes along. As long are you are comfortable in your own skin & self confident, you can break every single one of these so called rules & still have a successful fulfilling dating life. It's the game playing -- I'm gonna make him/her do all the work; I'm gonna keep them off balance; I'm only going to answer every 3rd phone call -- that makes people crazy. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author amazonrambo Posted October 24, 2017 Author Share Posted October 24, 2017 (edited) AmazonRambo Please realize that the PUA stuff from Corey Wayne & every guru like him is not to be taken any more literally then The Rules, which was a popular dating book / set of instructions for women. These are supposed to be guidelines designed to enable insecure people to stop prostrating themselves before every member of the opposite sex who comes along. As long are you are comfortable in your own skin & self confident, you can break every single one of these so called rules & still have a successful fulfilling dating life. It's the game playing -- I'm gonna make him/her do all the work; I'm gonna keep them off balance; I'm only going to answer every 3rd phone call -- that makes people crazy. He isn't a PUA, he's a life/relationship coach. He goes by basic human psychology and teaches you to be a man, to focus on your drive and life goals and how to act confident around women when rejection happens. He doesn't teach game playing at all, like he doesn't tell you to wait an hour or two to reply to manipulate her as others would do, he tells you to text back later after you finish work or whatever you're doing, aka don't drop what you're doing for the sake of a woman because your goals are more important. Read a sample of his book or some of his youtube videos. Maybe I've painted him in the wrong light, but he doesn't teach you to manipulate women like others try to. It's all about being happy with yourself, cutting the neediness, etc which most guys (like my former self) suffers from. Edited October 24, 2017 by amazonrambo Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 He doesn't teach game playing at all, like he doesn't tell you to wait an hour or two to reply to manipulate her as others would do, he tells you to text back later after you finish work or whatever you're doing, aka don't drop what you're doing for the sake of a woman because your goals are more important. How interesting. He advises men to reply to text when you're finished work or your activity and you are 100% in sync with that EXEPT when it's done to you. You just said you text that woman 8 hours ago to confirm the date and you deleted her number for not responding yet, isn't she allowed to the same rules as you? Why can't she get back to you when she is done with what ever she is doing? She's been online? so what? She is still entitled to play by the same rules as you. She will reply when she has time. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Imajerk17 Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 (edited) Like 8 pages and still no first date yet. Holy crap this thread blew up! I guess it's not really a thread on this forum until we all start discussing Corey Wayne OP I saw your text conversation, I think you handled her backing out really well. You stood your ground but you were a gentleman about it, not at all pushy. And it looks like you got her to change her mind. Nicely played. As far as whose way is "right" I am not going to get into it. As you can see from many of the responses, lot of women who'd likely make great girlfriends do have these rules though, some make more sense than others, maybe it comes from them being self-protective. It is what it is. ETA: Editted my post. Got confused on days. *Tonight* is OP's scheduled date. Hope you have fun OP! Edited October 25, 2017 by Imajerk17 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kazen Posted October 25, 2017 Share Posted October 25, 2017 i think the 48 hour rule was more applicable before sms texting...in the era of the dial phone I wonder what's the wait time when people used to communicate with carrier pigeons. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
kazen Posted October 25, 2017 Share Posted October 25, 2017 When you send that confirmation txt tomorrow, make sure you use proper punctuation. I hear some girls will cancel dates over bad punctuation. Base on what I learn from this thread, there's 90% chance she shows up on Wednesday's date. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
Highndry Posted October 25, 2017 Share Posted October 25, 2017 When you send that confirmation txt tomorrow, make sure you use proper punctuation. I hear some girls will cancel dates over bad punctuation. Base on what I learn from this thread, there's 90% chance she shows up on Wednesday's date. Good luck! Did you miss the last post where she never texted him back about confirming for the date tomorrow? She is a flake who says she'll do things then doesn't. Link to post Share on other sites
act00 Posted October 25, 2017 Share Posted October 25, 2017 I wonder what's the wait time when people used to communicate with carrier pigeons. Few people dated by such method outside of arranged marriages, I'm guessing. We all feel like the world is going to implode at any minute, and maybe it will, but maybe it's because we now live in a society where we have instant communication, and we're not getting our news by Pony Express. The world has shifted. Communication has shifted. Is it better? Yes. Is it worse? Yes. There are new rules. I grew up without cell phones. Hell, my husband got a beeper (a beeper) when we were expecting our first child for communication purposes because cell phones were rare, and insanely expensive and unreliable. How's that for dinosaurs? If the OP wants to exist like it's 1980, or 1990 for that matter, by all means, he's more than welcome to do so, but he will be met with negative ramifications. The OP can bend a little and comply to his current dating interest's wishes (within his comfort zone) and the world we live in or not. If he wants to be rigid and unbending, that's his prerogative. A bit of communication in that he doesn't like to text a lot is perfectly fine, and with that, his potential love interest can make a choice if this is acceptable to her or not. I hope BOTH accept a compromise. This whole scenario reeks of this woman expecting this man to be uninterested and bail or no-show, showing very little interest at all in her over the course of time. She wasn't very forthcoming in communication, but he was blowing her off for hours/days, stating some televangelist nonsense as his reasoning, and not offering her the same accommodations...double standards...it's totally okay to leave her hanging for 8 hours because he has "other things to do," but when she doesn't respond to his text immediately...block and delete! Are you interested? Toss a line. Men who are uninterested don't communicate. Keep comparing today's communication to old methods...really productive. I would send you a smoke signal on this, but I suspect you live in another area of the country, if not across the pond, and that would not be effective, and I have the internet. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Highndry Posted October 25, 2017 Share Posted October 25, 2017 Few people dated by such method outside of arranged marriages, I'm guessing. We all feel like the world is going to implode at any minute, and maybe it will, but maybe it's because we now live in a society where we have instant communication, and we're not getting our news by Pony Express. The world has shifted. Communication has shifted. Is it better? Yes. Is it worse? Yes. There are new rules. I grew up without cell phones. Hell, my husband got a beeper (a beeper) when we were expecting our first child for communication purposes because cell phones were rare, and insanely expensive and unreliable. How's that for dinosaurs? If the OP wants to exist like it's 1980, or 1990 for that matter, by all means, he's more than welcome to do so, but he will be met with negative ramifications. The OP can bend a little and comply to his current dating interest's wishes (within his comfort zone) and the world we live in or not. If he wants to be rigid and unbending, that's his prerogative. A bit of communication in that he doesn't like to text a lot is perfectly fine, and with that, his potential love interest can make a choice if this is acceptable to her or not. I hope BOTH accept a compromise. This whole scenario reeks of this woman expecting this man to be uninterested and bail or no-show, showing very little interest at all in her over the course of time. She wasn't very forthcoming in communication, but he was blowing her off for hours/days, stating some televangelist nonsense as his reasoning, and not offering her the same accommodations...double standards...it's totally okay to leave her hanging for 8 hours because he has "other things to do," but when she doesn't respond to his text immediately...block and delete! Are you interested? Toss a line. Men who are uninterested don't communicate. Keep comparing today's communication to old methods...really productive. I would send you a smoke signal on this, but I suspect you live in another area of the country, if not across the pond, and that would not be effective, and I have the internet. As a man, the only thing that jumps out to me is the fact that he's never talked to her on the phone. I would definitely have made a brief call to say "Hey, this is X, and I just wanted to say a quick hi. I know it may seem a bit awkward meeting for the first time but I promise I don't bite and I think we're going to have a great time. I'm looking forward to meeting you." Link to post Share on other sites
kazen Posted October 25, 2017 Share Posted October 25, 2017 Did you miss the last post where she never texted him back about confirming for the date tomorrow? She is a flake who says she'll do things then doesn't. I did missed it. I was a little behind lol. Today hasn't ended so let's see. If no reply by the end of tonight, then yup. She flaked again and it's over. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted October 25, 2017 Share Posted October 25, 2017 sorry, wrong thread Link to post Share on other sites
guest569 Posted October 25, 2017 Share Posted October 25, 2017 Did you miss the last post where she never texted him back about confirming for the date tomorrow? She is a flake who says she'll do things then doesn't. Well OP just mentioned that it was not in fact a confirmation text. I didn't before Sunday lol. I said I was looking forward to tonight. Not to be rude but please read the details I post! Saying "looking forward to tonight" perhaps did not warrant a response from her. To me is seems you expected a response immediately to say "ditto" to confirm even though you set the pace of minimal contact. i have read the details (all 10 pages of it) and it is obvious that the "looking forward to tonight " text was a blatant "are you going to stand me up?" Because you have said as much. If you want to be seen as masculine, you need to take charge and do some chasing. It seems you are being too passive (feminine) and appearing to be disinterested and disconcerted when she matches your style. Link to post Share on other sites
Imajerk17 Posted October 25, 2017 Share Posted October 25, 2017 (edited) Wow guys, I appreciate the responses, was fun to read The date didn't happen, shockingly. Although it didn't go the way I assumed it was.. So I'll just paste the texts as a pic as I'm too tired from work to write it all out: https://imgur.com/a/Zjlw3 I probably made a few mistakes in there as I was mentally tired after a long working day so it might have been better not having that date. I backed off and just said if she's free another time then let me know and she suddenly explained why. Guess she's used to talking a lot before meeting a stranger whereas I am direct, I prefer meeting face to face and getting to know a girl that way. She took a couple of minutes to reply to my texts. My third one I sent three hours later and it only took her 10 minutes to reply. Not expecting the date to go ahead on Wednesday but I usually give two chances for flaking. I'm talking to others too and not putting my eggs into one basket, options are obviously open as I'm single and not even met this girl yet. It's appealing because she lives right around the corner from me, but I don't want to get to know words on a screen! I went back and reread the text exchange. I'm confused how she could have already flaked. Is the date tonight or was it last night I got the impression the date is coming up tonight, Wednesday night. Whenever I set a date I say place/day-time and then write 'Does that work for you?'. That way there is no ambiguity. [i also send a text the morning of saying "See you tonight at y time, x place, looking forward to it!".] Anyway, yeah. I'm older so I agree in principle w those who say setting a date clearly 72 hours in advance and then not communicating before the date is fine. BUT I get that a lot of women want more communication before the date, and some people don't consider a date on unless they hear from you the day of. Doing this kept my flake rate low. Edited October 25, 2017 by Imajerk17 Link to post Share on other sites
heavenonearth Posted October 26, 2017 Share Posted October 26, 2017 What I learned from this thread: I don't know who Corey Wayne is, and I am glad about that. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted October 26, 2017 Share Posted October 26, 2017 Did y'all go on a date or not 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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