Bromeo Posted January 17, 2017 Share Posted January 17, 2017 The point is for OP to protect herself. If her ex is truly trying to reconcile, he will make additional efforts. If he is looking for a bootay call, then this may be the only outreach. For me, I am not going back to the misery of August-November 2016. If mine wanted me back, then her little email wont be the last. Whatever response you make, it won't be to your liking. 1. You respond, he doesn't. You feel worse. 2. You respond, he sends something untoward. You feel worse. 3. You respond, he responds. You over analyze his response to death. One post I read said that simply by asking for opinions here you most likely aren't in a position emotionally to respond. Makes sense. Food for thought. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted January 17, 2017 Author Share Posted January 17, 2017 yes, but only momentarily. He will then venture onto Tinder, or other online dating sites to fill the void. My ex went onto POF, and made his profile pic a pic I took of him. I knew because I creeped his username, and saw he was back on. We met on there and I am sure he thought I would be on there too and would see him. My account was deleted though...lol you have no idea how much you remind me of myself lol. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted January 17, 2017 Author Share Posted January 17, 2017 The point is for OP to protect herself. If her ex is truly trying to reconcile, he will make additional efforts. If he is looking for a bootay call, then this may be the only outreach. For me, I am not going back to the misery of August-November 2016. If mine wanted me back, then her little email wont be the last. Whatever response you make, it won't be to your liking. 1. You respond, he doesn't. You feel worse. 2. You respond, he sends something untoward. You feel worse. 3. You respond, he responds. You over analyze his response to death. One post I read said that simply by asking for opinions here you most likely aren't in a position emotionally to respond. Makes sense. Food for thought. During the call he said dumb **** like I dreamt of you two days ago and I missed you but you blocked me everywhere which is a bunch of bull**** because he can obviously easily contact me. I asked him not to call me again, he called me 4 hours later. I blocked the new number. Link to post Share on other sites
VeveCakes Posted January 17, 2017 Share Posted January 17, 2017 you have no idea how much you remind me of myself lol. I know...it's nice to know we arent alone. It'snot nice to know this is a common theme with emotionally unavailable men lol During the call he said dumb **** like I dreamt of you two days ago and I missed you but you blocked me everywhere which is a bunch of bull**** because he can obviously easily contact me. I asked him not to call me again, he called me 4 hours later. I blocked the new number. yeah, mine messaged me on Instagram the first time I blocked him...literally the message said "why do you hate me now?" Like ok...that's rich buddy. Gee I wonder WHY.... Link to post Share on other sites
seekingpeaceinlove Posted January 17, 2017 Share Posted January 17, 2017 (edited) Stay strong, Nadine. I've had many exes come crawling back and I took back a few but rejected the ones that had burned the bridge when they broke it off in a cruel way. Ghosting is cruel. There was one broke up with me on my bday via text just before I boarded a plane coming back from a vacation. The break up blindsided me. For hours I was stuck on the plane going crazy. When I landed and tried to call he ignored them and eventually turned off his phone. I'm not a begger and/or a chaser so I stopped all contact. Months later he came crawling back. He said he missed me and wanted to be with me again. I slept with him that night and then dumped him the next morning. It was revenge, yes. It was mean but damn satisfying. He didn't take it well and sent me nasty emails. 4 Years after that he still contacted me saying he missed me. LOL. You do not want to undo the progress you made for a coward who had such little respect for you that he ghosted you for another girl. You're too good for that. He doesn't exist and keep thinking that. Block him and don't answer unknown numbers. Eventually he'll get the hint and will always put you on a pedestal as that "girl who got away." Edited January 17, 2017 by seekingpeaceinlove 3 Link to post Share on other sites
jamili Posted January 17, 2017 Share Posted January 17, 2017 That's funny. Who cares if he is or not? He's a legit a$$h*le. Isn't that enough? I get it man. I just saying... sometimes people can change after a break up - both parties. But, tbh after reading the latest stuff he has been doing, like the "why do you hate me now" etc... it does seem like he's an idiot Link to post Share on other sites
VeveCakes Posted January 17, 2017 Share Posted January 17, 2017 I get it man. I just saying... sometimes people can change after a break up - both parties. But, tbh after reading the latest stuff he has been doing, like the "why do you hate me now" etc... it does seem like he's an idiot that was my ex - also an idiot :lmao: Link to post Share on other sites
Sweetfish Posted January 17, 2017 Share Posted January 17, 2017 I would but you were extremely rude to me in my last post so I dont think you would be beneficial to me in any way. People like zahara veve and the others who know my story from the beginning know what im talking about. also please refrain from commenting on my posts, your opinion isnt really welcomed. thanks That is based on your opinion as i stated a fact and you didn't like the FACTs. But it is your thread and i respect that and your wishes. Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
SerPundnes Posted January 17, 2017 Share Posted January 17, 2017 Dumpers that REALLY (read: REALLY) wants to come back to the dumpee will move MOUNTAINS to show that they're serious. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
MeadowFlower Posted January 18, 2017 Share Posted January 18, 2017 Dumpers that REALLY (read: REALLY) wants to come back to the dumpee will move MOUNTAINS to show that they're serious. This is good ^ Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted January 18, 2017 Author Share Posted January 18, 2017 That is based on your opinion as i stated a fact and you didn't like the FACTs. But it is your thread and i respect that and your wishes. Good luck every single person here has sid ''FACTS'' and i didnt have an issue with them. Also, your opinion isnt necessary a fact or true, just for your info. Regardless, I hope you learn how to say your ''FACTS'' in a respectful and proper way. Good luck to you too Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted January 20, 2017 Author Share Posted January 20, 2017 So guys Ive been feeling better again. I just have a question. I blocked calls from the weird number but I didnt block him on whatsapp because I didnt think about it at all. Should I block him on whatsapp as well? I dont want him to think that ''okay I didnt text or call for four days'' so she got upset and blocked me. Im happy I ignored his hoovering but isnt it better to not give a reaction at all.I know i shouldnt care what he thinks but i really dont want to feed his egoistic ass. Link to post Share on other sites
SerPundnes Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 Block him everywhere! If he suddenly texts you on Whatsapp, you'll get set back from your progression. Like I said earlier, if he wants to come back, he'll find a way to get to you. For now, block all channels of communication. For your own sake and healing. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted January 20, 2017 Author Share Posted January 20, 2017 Hi he did come back, not sure if you read my new thread Isnt that feeding his ego? Link to post Share on other sites
keiji Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 So guys Ive been feeling better again. I just have a question. I blocked calls from the weird number but I didnt block him on whatsapp because I didnt think about it at all. Should I block him on whatsapp as well? I dont want him to think that ''okay I didnt text or call for four days'' so she got upset and blocked me. Im happy I ignored his hoovering but isnt it better to not give a reaction at all.I know i shouldnt care what he thinks but i really dont want to feed his egoistic ass. Blocking him is mandatory! As you say, what he thinks is up to him and if he's an egotistical person, he'll find all possible detours to conclude "she's crazy about me" regardless of your actions. Keeping communication channels open can just bring more suffering and setbacks. If he now thinks you're not over him, it's true, isn't it? The thing is, one day you'll be over him and he'll be totally wrong. The sooner you keep a healthy distance, the sooner you'll prove him wrong. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted January 20, 2017 Author Share Posted January 20, 2017 I think he was shocked that I ignored him and didnt agree to meet him or pick up on any of his other calls since i used to always run back to him. Pathetic I know, but that is over with now. There is really no way that he would think im still not over him. So do you think i should still block him? I dont mind at all I just dont want to give him the satisfaction Link to post Share on other sites
ElsieA Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 and I know how much it sucks. It's a similar case with my ex but I am just shy of three weeks NC...so a long way to go. But he did this in and out of my life thing for the last 5 months. I can't even believe 5 months have gone by since he ghosted me. Yet he was constantly texting me and then disappearing. He came to see me once...then disappear again. I can't remember who said it on my thread, but basically they can not commit to us or commit to not having us. It is us that has to decide in the end. That is the hardest part, because as we have truly good intentions, we care about them and when they come back, we have that glimmer of hope that they want us for real. Sadly, they want us for their own ego boost, and will leave us again when we give in. This right here is So True !!!!!!!!! ???? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
keiji Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 I think he was shocked that I ignored him and didnt agree to meet him or pick up on any of his other calls since i used to always run back to him. Pathetic I know, but that is over with now. There is really no way that he would think im still not over him. So do you think i should still block him? I dont mind at all I just dont want to give him the satisfaction If you're asking it probably means that you're not fully over him and therefore, you must block him. Let me give you a personal example that illustrates your ex's behavior. For three years I had an on and off incredibly toxic relationship with a girl that has an ego the size of a 3-ton truck. I decided to stay away from her and we didn't speak for two years. She reappeared intending to be friends and asked me out to dinner. I agreed thinking that things would be fine. She confessed to having missed me every single day for two years, I was the man of her life, etc. I told her we are incompatible and can't be together. We remain friends. Fast forward six months. One day she gets insanely jealous when she sees me talking to a beautiful friend of mine she hates. I tell her I won't tolerate her bouts of anger anymore and I cut all contact. One month later she reaches out via e-mail. I give her all the motives for me not to talk to her and I refuse her invitation to go out for beers. Her answer: "Can't you accept I don't want to be with you?". Whatever you do, he'll need to keep his ego intact. If you tell him you're in love with a man you'll be marrying in six months, he'll go, "Poor guy. He's just a rebound". So think about you only and protect yourself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 So do you think i should still block him? Block him everywhere. I think you want to keep a door open because it gives you some sort of relief and that deep down you want to hear from him because it validates you. Shut the door. You want nothing to do with this guy anymore. It's time to move on. Block him. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted January 20, 2017 Author Share Posted January 20, 2017 "Can't you accept I don't want to be with you?". . wow, this reminds me of him exactly. Always making other peopel inferior whenever anything happens. I'll block him now. Thank you as always! Link to post Share on other sites
keiji Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 wow, this reminds me of him exactly. Always making other peopel inferior whenever anything happens. Which only goes to show how inferior he actually feels. From time to time, when he locks the door at night and sits by himself, reality hits him. As we say in my country, lies have short legs. Self-deceit doesn't get too far, either. If you ignore him you're sending the clearest possible message while protecting yourself. I'm glad you're blocking him!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted January 27, 2017 Author Share Posted January 27, 2017 he hasnt called back or texted since from other numbers. i guess he wasnt really sincere then. does anyone have a similar thing happen to them before? Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted January 27, 2017 Share Posted January 27, 2017 he hasnt called back or texted since from other numbers. i guess he wasnt really sincere then. does anyone have a similar thing happen to them before? He wasn't sincere from the beginning. Go back and read your history with him and seek acceptance. Your expectations are skewed. You're having difficulty with grasping the reality of this man. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted January 27, 2017 Author Share Posted January 27, 2017 No no i know he sucks, I was just curious. Yeah youre right xx Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted January 27, 2017 Share Posted January 27, 2017 No no i know he sucks, I was just curious. Yeah youre right xx Try to focus your energy on moving on. It's the past. It's over. It's done. Every time you start to dwell in curiosity, pull yourself in, shift your attention to what's important. Remind yourself of the reality. There's nothing to be curious about. He was not sincere then and isn't now. There's nothing different about him. There hasn't been a single moment where you've been able to come up with a concrete conclusion as to who and what this man is all about, in the many times he's treated you badly, so this exercise is futile and no amount of asking is going to garner you any answer or solution other than to seek acceptance and move on. Surrender to what is. You'll find it much easier to let go. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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