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Is my BIL attracted to me?


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He sounds really creepy. I'd make sure that we were never alone and I'd keep my distance, if I was you.

 

And, I think your husband needs to know that his brother makes you uncomftable. If he steps over the line, your husband should be the one to talk with him and tell him that his behavior is inappropriate.

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What do you think I should say to DH though? His brother hasn't directly done anything wrong and I dont want it to look like I'm causing trouble.

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Scarlett.O'hara

I had a quick look at your other thread regarding the same issue. While I'm not sure how he feels towards you, it sounds pretty clear that you are completely infatuated with him, so you will probably read into every little thing he does.

 

Unless you want to cause a massive amount of damage and hurt to your partner and his family, you need to get a grip and control of this fantasy now.

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Why start another discussion when you have already had lots of advice about your situation? And why, did you not share the entire truth?

 

It's very clear that you like the attention and you are completely attracted to the brother in law. Perhaps, he won't be your "brother in law" much longer because your boyfriend doesn't really deserve to date a woman who makes repeated posts about his brother - wondering and hoping and examining if every look might mean that he is sexually attracted to her...

 

Really, forget him and move on. He is married and you are in another relationship. Who cares what he thinks or how long he looks at you. It doesn't matter.

 

But if you insist on continuing with this immature behavior, then by all means, don't let anyone stop you...

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ShatteredLady

Stand & sit next to your partner. Be more affectionate (to your PARTNER) when you're around his family. Don't you hold hands when you walk? I always do with my husband.

 

Your sister in law is family. Have you ever had lunch together? Gone shopping? Sister stuff.

 

I remember you from before. I find your family dynamic very strange. This isn't a brand new relationship. You have a child. When I meet my husband's family (my extended FAMILY) I hug my BIL's. I've danced with them at weddings & parties. If one rested his hand on my leg whilst reaching for something it would feel no different from a SIL doing it. We're a pretty tactile family.

 

I think the problem here is simple, YOU have the hots for your BIL so his every glance, every action & every word is analyzed. YOU need to stop this! Please don't say you can't control your feelings!!

 

PLEASE! Marriage is ALL about controlling your feelings. If you don't think you could resist your own BIL what chance does your relationship stand when you're attracted to a man with no taboo or stigma attached? You're an affair waiting to happen if you don't set boundaries & stop fantasizing about other men.

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What do you think I should say to DH though? His brother hasn't directly done anything wrong and I dont want it to look like I'm causing trouble.

 

Tell him what you told us. That his brother lingers when touching your hand, stares at you as well as the other physical contact he's inappropriately done. You asked us how to do this back in October. Why haven't you told your husband by now?

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