***Disillusionment***

[Dis]

The bolded sounds like a recipe for disaster.

 

I'm doing it in a week because of the moon phase that will occur in a week

[Simon Phoenix]

I came here for support and I got tons of it and I cant tell all of you how much I appreciate the support and wise words you have given me. You have all opened my eyes up to so many things I would have never thought of on my own. However:

 

Please keep in mind that what you are all critiquing is a part of my religion which I am sensitve about. Mostly because of how misunderstood it is

 

What am I critiquing exactly? If you're blocking him out, you aren't sending it back to him. You're just not letting him get to you. And honestly, you are being incredibly vague -- it's hard not to accidentally critique when you aren't exactly being open about things. Of course, you don't have to be open about it, but you really can't take offense to things when you aren't being forthright. It's hard to avoid offending someone when you have no idea what is offensive, ya know?

 

There's confusion because you are being cryptic.

[Dis]

373 - no one was criticising your religious beliefs. Your vagueness about it caused a bit of confusion regarding your intentions.

 

I feel like I may not be able to write on these forums anymore. Everyone has the wrong idea of me and my intentions. That makes me very sad because of how much you have all helped me

[Dis]

What am I critiquing exactly? If you're blocking him out, you aren't sending it back to him. You're just not letting him get to you. And honestly, you are being incredibly vague -- it's hard not to accidentally critique when you aren't exactly being open about things. Of course, you don't have to be open about it, but you really can't take offense to things when you aren't being forthright. It's hard to avoid offending someone when you have no idea what is offensive, ya know?

 

There's confusion because you are being cryptic.

 

Ok fine...here it is. I am Wiccan. When someone sends a Wiccan, negative energy we do a ritual using a mirror to send their negativity (and only that) back to them. By doing so it sends back and blocks their negativity from us. It also cleanses us because we are no longer exposed. I hope this clarified things.

[266696687]

I feel like I may not be able to write on these forums anymore. Everyone has the wrong idea of me and my intentions. That makes me very sad because of how much you have all helped me

 

Don't worry it was a simple misunderstanding that has now been resolved.

 

You are free to practice and believe in the religion of your choice.

 

When you stated you had a plan to carry out in a week (being vague) it sounded like a revenge plot rather than a religious activity hence the concern about your intentions.

[Simon Phoenix]

Ok fine...here it is. I am Wiccan. When someone sends a Wiccan, negative energy we do a ritual using a mirror to send their negativity (and only that) back to them. By doing so it sends back and blocks their negativity from us. It also cleanses us because we are no longer exposed. I hope this clarified things.

 

Fair enough, though on a non-religious take of that, why does it matter where it goes after it's blocked? Why can't it just be blocked and just go wherever? I mean, it just seems to unnecessarily involve the other person for no reason. I guess I would equate it to the Berlin Wall -- it blocks you from crossing but otherwise doesn't really care what you're doing as long as you aren't crossing to the other side. JMO.

 

As far as the whole blocking thing, you don't need to wait till the full moon to block him on your phone/email/social media That's something you can, and should, do ASAP.

[Dis]

Don't worry it was a simple misunderstanding that has now been resolved.

 

You are free to practice and believe in the religion of your choice.

 

When you stated you had a plan to carry out in a week (being vague) it sounded like a revenge plot rather than a religious activity hence the concern about your intentions.

 

I'm doing it in a week because of the moon phase that will occur in a week. We can only do this type of ritual during the end of a wanning moon.

 

Ya I'm sure that sounded horrible.

 

I'm sorry that I was being oversensitive. My emotions are hightened as of late.

[Dis]

Fair enough, though on a non-religious take of that, why does it matter where it goes after it's blocked? Why can't it just be blocked and just go wherever? I mean, it just seems to unnecessarily involve the other person for no reason. I guess I would equate it to the Berlin Wall -- it blocks you from crossing but otherwise doesn't really care what you're doing as long as you aren't crossing to the other side. JMO.

 

As far as the whole blocking thing, you don't need to wait till the full moon to block him on your phone/email/social media That's something you can, and should, do ASAP.

 

I def understand what your saying. And I know some of this is hard to understand.

 

We believe that negative energy is a harmful thing therefore it should go back to the person who produced it, no where else.

 

Yes I am considering blocking him on my phone. Were not friends on facebook or anything. I'm torn about blocking him from my phone. I have a naive hope that he'll txt me that he wants me back and I wont respond which would drive him crazy. This is an unhealthy hope to have...I know.

[Captivating]

Hi,

He seems to have some narcissistic qualities....love bombing, trying to gain something from the relationship, need for self validation, has a hard time taking criticism, disengaged/confused emotions, blaming you for everything. There are lots of youtube videos on this, watch "the spartan life coach" videos...this is his favorite topic

 

Disillusionment , you seem to be such a nice, caring person. When a woman takes care of a man's every need, trying to solve his problems....although these are really nice gestures !....it emasculate a man, he won't feel like a man beside you. You tended to his needs in a motherly fashion by cooking all his meals, washing dishes....in a way you wanted to impress him, wanted his acceptance. Please don't give your all right away! Bit by bit Things went way too fast...

 

RED FLAG :

" Thank you so much. I think when he said to me, "Dont piss off a guy, guys have tempers and when we get mad we hit people, not that I would hit you but you know" that was the only warning sign I needed."

 

Trust me, it is a blessing that it's over....something is not right in his head and it is his responsibility to deal with it and get help, not yours.

 

Be careful going over to his apartment !

Start dating again, you will find that special person, don't worry !!! Always meet at public places, just to be on the safe side. Good luck !

[Simon Phoenix]

I def understand what your saying. And I know some of this is hard to understand.

 

We believe that negative energy is a harmful thing therefore it should go back to the person who produced it, no where else.

 

Yes I am considering blocking him on my phone. Were not friends on facebook or anything. I'm torn about blocking him from my phone. I have a naive hope that he'll txt me that he wants me back and I wont respond which would drive him crazy. This is an unhealthy hope to have...I know.

 

And you waiting for him to do that so you can "burn" him will drive your crazy -- or at least hinder you from moving forward. Translate your religious beliefs to your phone -- I mean, what's the point of "blocking" spiritually if you give him access physically? There isn't one. Even if you don't respond, he's still getting through and you're still being affected.

 

Your refusal to block on the phone is completely counterproductive and doesn't make sense, especially in concert with your religious ritual. It's a contradiction of philosophies.

[katiegrl]

I'm doing it in a week because of the moon phase that will occur in a week

 

Dis, I support your decision but can't help but wonder ....once you toss the negative back to him.....what's to prevent HIM from tossing it back to you?

 

Are you saying that after you toss it back to him, you *then* will block him ....from your phone, your email, your social media, and ultimately your consciousness?

 

I hope so .... because if you don't, then of course he will toss it back to you, after which you begin to engage in a sort of *negative energy volleyball* ..... tossing the negative back and forth between you...until you both become either exhausted, emotionally destroyed or both.

 

For me, and I know others, what works is simply *dismissing* negative people from my life, allowing such people NO access to me or my life ..... and thus extricating all the negative energy from my life and consciousness.

 

Which in turn leaves my life and consciousness free and open to receiving all that positive energy generating in the world flowing into me.

 

Energy consciousness.

Edited February 26, 2016 by katiegrl

[Dis]

And you waiting for him to do that so you can "burn" him will drive your crazy -- or at least hinder you from moving forward. Translate your religious beliefs to your phone -- I mean, what's the point of "blocking" spiritually if you give him access physically? There isn't one. Even if you don't respond, he's still getting through and you're still being affected.

 

Your refusal to block on the phone is completely counterproductive and doesn't make sense, especially in concert with your religious ritual. It's a contradiction of philosophies.

 

Yup I know, just because I'm spiritual doesnt mean I'm perfect. I know I have a screwed up sense of logic because I'm hesistant to block him on my phone. I dont know why but I'm feeling attacked tonight on these forums because of this whole religious issue. These forums used to help me. Now they are stressing me out. I dont know if its me being oversensitive or not but I'm pretty upset

[Simon Phoenix]

[/b]

 

Yup I know, just because I'm spiritual doesnt mean I'm perfect. I know I have a screwed up sense of logic because I'm hesistant to block him on my phone. I dont know why but I'm feeling attacked tonight on these forums because of this whole religious issue. These forums used to help me. Now they are stressing me out. I dont know if its me being oversensitive or not but I'm pretty upset

 

Your religion isn't being attacked at all. You're using it as a copout to avoid the real issue that's being brought up -- your stubborn refusal to detach. If anything, the tenets of your religion should be an asset to you making this necessary step, but you won't do this. If anything, the whole Wiccan blocking thing is something that you need to execute across the board, not arbitrarily like you are doing.

 

No one is attacking your religion. If anything, we're telling you to be true to the blocking belief system of it in all ways.

[Dis]

I'm blocking my ex and my previous ex tomorrow. I dont want to be tied to this last one...waiting by the phone...hoping I'll have a chance to turn him down...thats setting myself up for failure and hurt. I want to be done with him. Completely erase him. Thank you for those of you that kindly helped me come to that realization.

 

And considering he will be completely out of my life I have no need to send his negativity back to him. Whats done is done. I will let sleeping dogs lie.

 

***Please let me make this clear**** If this was an ongoing issue, a situation that I could not get myself out of...I would send his negativity back to him***

 

 

I will never know what went on in his head, I will never know why he did the things he did...but I suppose I was never intended to. This has taught me a valuble lesson that I need to be more careful entering relationships in the future.

 

*****Thank you all for giving me a tremendous amount of insight which I couldve never have given myself*****

Edited February 26, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Dis]

I'm blocking my ex and my previous ex tomorrow. I dont want to be tied to this last one...waiting by the phone...hoping I'll have a chance to turn him down...thats setting myself up for failure and hurt. I want to be done with him. Completely erase him. Thank you for those of you that kindly helped me come to that realization.

 

And considering he will be completely out of my life I have no need to send his negativity back to him. Whats done is done. I will let sleeping dogs lie.

 

***Please let me make this clear**** If this was an ongoing issue, a situation that I could not get myself out of...I would send his negativity back to him***

 

 

I will never know what went on in his head, I will never know why he did the things he did...but I suppose I was never intended to. This has taught me a valuble lesson that I need to be more careful entering relationships in the future.

 

*****Thank you all for giving me a tremendous amount of insight which I couldve never have given myself*****

 

I called my phone carrier today (metropcs, I have an andriod) Apparently all I could do was block his (and my previous ex's) phone calls (which I did).

There wasnt an option to block his txts so I put his phone number in my spam folder. Only problem is if he txts my I can still see his txts if I go into that folder (which will be tempting)

There was no option with metropcs to completly block his txts. I hope I dont look in that folder.

[William]

This thread reopened after review.

 

After deleting close to 30 posts, I strongly urge everyone participating to keep things on topic, and to alert moderation rather then engaging in debates that steer things away from the intended topic ~Thank you

[Dis]

This thread reopened after review.

 

After deleting close to 30 posts, I strongly urge everyone participating to keep things on topic, and to alert moderation rather then engaging in debates that steer things away from the intended topic ~Thank you

 

Thank you William!

 

*****To Everyone who has posted: I know I was at fault for being too vague about my intentions and causing confusion so I apologize to you all.

[Dis]

I called my phone carrier today (metropcs, I have an andriod) Apparently all I could do was block his (and my previous ex's) phone calls (which I did).

There wasnt an option to block his txts so I put his phone number in my spam folder. Only problem is if he txts my I can still see his txts if I go into that folder (which will be tempting)

I cant believe there was no option with metropcs to completly block his txts. I hope I dont look in that folder. (I'm tempted).

 

Tonight is a weird/sad night. I would usually be at his house right now. Its just an adjustment. I'm not good with change at all.

 

I've had some time to think about myself and what I was at fault for in this last relationship. I really allowed myself to lose who I was (not the first time) I allowed myself to get tangled up in him despite the fact that deep down I knew he wasnt right for me...despite the fact that I knew he wasnt a healthy safe person to be with.

 

My need to be with him (with anyone) is what really screwed me up. I'm shifting the focus onto me now. At the end of the day my happiness lies within myself, no one else can do that for me. Its a hard lesson to learn but thanks to you all and some introspection I'm starting to get there.

 

I'm sure I'll shift from feeling empowered to lonley to sad so I'll be posting for sure.

[Dis]

Hi,

He seems to have some narcissistic qualities....love bombing, trying to gain something from the relationship, need for self validation, has a hard time taking criticism, disengaged/confused emotions, blaming you for everything. There are lots of youtube videos on this, watch "the spartan life coach" videos...this is his favorite topic

 

Disillusionment , you seem to be such a nice, caring person. When a woman takes care of a man's every need, trying to solve his problems....although these are really nice gestures !....it emasculate a man, he won't feel like a man beside you. You tended to his needs in a motherly fashion by cooking all his meals, washing dishes....in a way you wanted to impress him, wanted his acceptance. Please don't give your all right away! Bit by bit Things went way too fast...

 

RED FLAG :

" Thank you so much. I think when he said to me, "Dont piss off a guy, guys have tempers and when we get mad we hit people, not that I would hit you but you know" that was the only warning sign I needed."

 

Trust me, it is a blessing that it's over....something is not right in his head and it is his responsibility to deal with it and get help, not yours.

 

Be careful going over to his apartment !

Start dating again, you will find that special person, don't worry !!! Always meet at public places, just to be on the safe side. Good luck !

 

Captivating thank you so much for your support last night. Youre a very kind person. You have a good heart. I agree that it is a blessing that its over. I'm lucky I got out when I did. But still....losing a person I was so close to (whether he was an a**hole or not...and he was) is hard to deal with.

 

And yes I gave myself away way too fast. But honestly it wouldnt have mattered what pace I went at with this guy because of how screwed up he was. After hearing from other posters who suggested this guy might have borderline personality disorder or narcissitic personality disorder I did some reading....he seemed to exhibit alot of the symptoms associated with these disorders but mostly BPD.

 

But I will keep your advice in mind for the next guy for sure.

 

I hope to hear more from you

[trippi1432]

I called my phone carrier today (metropcs, I have an andriod) Apparently all I could do was block his (and my previous ex's) phone calls (which I did).

There wasnt an option to block his txts so I put his phone number in my spam folder. Only problem is if he txts my I can still see his txts if I go into that folder (which will be tempting)

I cant believe there was no option with metropcs to completly block his txts. I hope I dont look in that folder. (I'm tempted).

 

Tonight is a weird/sad night. I would usually be at his house right now. Its just an adjustment. I'm not good with change at all.

 

I've had some time to think about myself and what I was at fault for in this last relationship. I really allowed myself to lose who I was (not the first time) I allowed myself to get tangled up in him despite the fact that deep down I knew he wasnt right for me...despite the fact that I knew he wasnt a healthy safe person to be with.

 

My need to be with him (with anyone) is what really screwed me up. I'm shifting the focus onto me now. At the end of the day my happiness lies within myself, no one else can do that for me. Its a hard lesson to learn but thanks to you all and some introspection I'm starting to get there.

 

I'm sure I'll shift from feeling empowered to lonley to sad so I'll be posting for sure.

 

Hi Diss373, the important thing is that you get back to feeling empowered, healing is a process and it does take looking at yourself as well as looking at the traits in previous relationships to know what you don't want or need in your life.

 

I like your statement about shifting the focus onto you now, that's a good start and precisely the right step in the right direction in healing from this situation.

 

I have a very good friend who is an Empath and I would say that the more in tune you are to yourself, the better your intuition will be. Right now, honing your skills in knowing YOU and loving YOU is when you will get through the "process" and back to feeling empowered in positive ways.

 

Please do continue posting as you process these feelings, that's what this forum is for. Blessed be!

[Dis]

Hi Diss373, the important thing is that you get back to feeling empowered, healing is a process and it does take looking at yourself as well as looking at the traits in previous relationships to know what you don't want or need in your life.

 

I like your statement about shifting the focus onto you now, that's a good start and precisely the right step in the right direction in healing from this situation.

 

I have a very good friend who is an Empath and I would say that the more in tune you are to yourself, the better your intuition will be. Right now, honing your skills in knowing YOU and loving YOU is when you will get through the "process" and back to feeling empowered in positive ways.

 

Please do continue posting as you process these feelings, that's what this forum is for. Blessed be!

 

Thanks Trip, I'm happy to hear from you. I went out tonight and got new sneakers and work-out clothes so I can start going to to gym. I want the gym to be my new passion, something that makes me feel good and a place to go when I'm lonley and need something to do. (I live alone). The only problem is I'm scared to step into the gym. I dont know why but I'm intimidated. Its going to be a big step for me and I'm scared to take it.

 

My phone carrier would not offer an option to completly block my ex's texts. All I could do was move any possible texts to a spam folder. I'm so tempted to look in that folder right now. Even though I want nothing to do with him, I still want him to want me. I know thats unhealthy. Is it abnormal that I'm wondering what he's doing right now and what he's thinking? Its day 4 of the break up so I'm not sure if I should have made more progress.

 

Youre right about being in tune with myself, I feel in many apsects I am, however in relationships I'm blinded. I hope I can get better with that. I think spending time on my own is a good step.

 

Blessed be!

[Dis]

Ok...The spam folder his texts were supposed to go in did not work!!!

 

He said:

 

-"Why did you block my call?"

-"Are you still not talking to me? Even if we did not work out I still care about you, like you, and want to remain friends."

-"I did not expect you to ignore me. I'm not sure what the reason is or what your trying to prove."

-"[name redacted], I'm not texting you as a booty call or anything. What is the point of not talking? I dont believe I did anything harmful, bad or disrespectful towards you."

 

Ughhhhh...spam folder, you have failed me.

Edited March 1, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
name redacted ~6

[Dis]

Ok...The spam folder his texts were supposed to go in did not work!!!

 

He said:

 

-"Why did you block my call?"

-"Are you still not talking to me? Even if we did not work out I still care about you, like you, and want to remain friends."

-"I did not expect you to ignore me. I'm not sure what the reason is or what your trying to prove."

-"[name redacted], I'm not texting you as a booty call or anything. What is the point of not talking? I dont believe I did anything harmful, bad or disrespectful towards you."

 

Ughhhhh...spam folder, you have failed me.

 

Does anyone know how I can block his txts even though my phone carrier (metropcs...I have an andriod) with not offer me an option to block his txts (I could only block his calls)

 

Thanks!

Edited March 1, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
name redacted from quote ~6

[Simon Phoenix]

Does anyone know how I can block his txts even though my phone carrier (metropcs...I have an andriod) with not offer me an option to block his txts (I could only block his calls)

 

Thanks!

 

No clue. Perhaps changing your number is the next step. I have an iPhone and it's really easy to block numbers so I don't know.

[Dis]

No clue. Perhaps changing your number is the next step. I have an iPhone and it's really easy to block numbers so I don't know.

 

I think it may be time for a new phone...might as well get a new carrier so I can block this number. Thanks