My turn to see what's out there!

[OneLov]

 

In fact, the situation is even worse when it comes to TRO. Not only are constitutional rights to due process tossed out the window, first amendment right to free speech is also tossed out. I kid you, if I were to setup a blog doing nothing more than naming my wife, her AP, the judge who granted the TRO and deputy who served me along with the facts of the case, I could and probably would be charged with felony harassment.

 

Check out the site I linked below if you don't believe me. Dan Brewington was sentenced to 5 years in prison and actually served 3 years for criticizing a judge. It went all the way to the supreme court and they ruled in favor of the conviction!

 

I know we like to toot our horn here in the States but its bull****! We don't have half the rights we think we have!.

 

TRO's are granted ex parte for obvious reasons. Key word is: Temporary. Because of due process issues, the scope of the TRO must be narrowly tailor to objectively prevent a real and imminent threat of harm. If she was lying, as you say, she could face very serious criminal consequences.

 

If you do what the man in the article did, you would likely be jailed too. Words used to incite or provoke an imminent breach of the peace and cause violence and inflict injury on persons and property are not protected by the First Amendment. This mentally ill person made numerous and repeated threats of arson and aggravated assault on these people -- those are very serious crimes. His cyberstalking and harassment exceeded a level of mere venting, and his obsession with vindication is downright chilling.

 

One does not have the right to cause others to live in fear for his or her own personal satisfaction. This is why a bomb threat, even despite it being completely empty words, is unprotected speech.

 

Our justice system also recognizes retribution ultimately does little for victims and their families. For example, executing a murder does not alive the eternal pain from victim's loved ones. It may feel good temporarily, but it's not going to bring the person back.

 

Just like your situation, it may feel good have an affair as a form of retribution for your wife's affair. But even if you succeed, it's not going to change the fact she betrayed you. After your pound of flesh is received, you will still feel broken. Anger only leads to more negative feelings. You need to heal.

 

OL

[ShatteredLady]

Are you truly planning on leaving your 4 children so you can go hunt women around the world or are you just blowing hot air because you're so hurt & in so much pain?

 

PLEASE! You're the only father they will ever have. Even leaving them to teach in Mexico at this emotional time seems like a very bad idea to me. Will you be earning a lot more money to support them? Please tell us that you're planning on paying child support.

 

I know the pain of betrayal. It made me want to hold my babies even tighter. Take care of them. Love them. They NEED you!

[higgsboson]

Are you truly planning on leaving your 4 children so you can go hunt women around the world or are you just blowing hot air because you're so hurt & in so much pain?

 

PLEASE! You're the only father they will ever have. Even leaving them to teach in Mexico at this emotional time seems like a very bad idea to me. Will you be earning a lot more money to support them? Please tell us that you're planning on paying child support.

 

I know the pain of betrayal. It made me want to hold my babies even tighter. Take care of them. Love them. They NEED you!

Shattered - I'll only be leaving my two daughters to teach in Mexico - my two sons are from my first marriage and they are both in university. But I'm more than truely planning: my contract is signed and I can't wait to go. In all honesty, the fact that I get to leave in just 6 short months from now is the only thing that gets me out of bed in the morning.

 

My D-Day was 7 months ago and emotions were really running high the first few months but everything is calm now. My wife will certainly have a lot to juggle between work and taking care of the kids - I don't know how she'll manage and she has expressed her anxiety about that. But then again, did she give even half a seconds thought to how my son and I were going to manage when she had us removed from the house? I survived without her help and dealt with homelessness so she'll just need to survive without my help.

 

Like I said before, my wife thinks we are reconciling and maybe it will work out that way. I want to see what's out there just like she did. If I meet someone and I fall in love then I'll proceed to divorce. Until then, most of my salary goes to my wife. I'll take what I need to give her the rest. Child support is as up in the air as the future of my marriage.

 

I'm going though and I can't wait!

Edited February 4, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
language ~T

[Whoknew30]

I don't understand you kind of forgiving your wife but not a state...ontop of now trusting her to be with your daughter's alone after bringing a sexual predator into their lives. You don't make a whole lot of sense.

[Mr Mind of Shazam]

What does the LoveShack community think?

I think you should seek therapy, frankly.

[ShatteredLady]

How old are your girls? Will your mother at least be involved & supporting, keeping an eye on your children? What if your wife allows that pervert or another into their lives?

 

Aren't you going to miss being part of your children's day to day lives? As a parent I find this really hard to understand.

 

Can I ask what your heritage is, are you Mexican?

[ShatteredLady]

You say that things have 'settled down' but it's very clear to everyone that you're still incredibly angry & venomous about the way you've been treated & everything that you've experienced.

 

I've been betrayed, completely 'blind sided'. I also had the horrific experience of reading their email communications. Ugh!! I know what you mean about trying to get those things out of your head!

 

I'm worried. Have you always been prone to anger & extreme reactions? What I'm asking basically...Is this in character for you? I know how these terrible experiences can effect our minds.

 

Would you share what you went through in your first marriage. Was the divorce very hard? Did you take time to adjust before starting the relationship with your current wife?

 

Emigrating, completely changing everything can be very tempting. Are you sure you're not more damaged than you think you are? You're making drastic, huge life changing descisions.

 

Are you sure that your mind is in the right state to do this? You're not presenting yourself in a positive way here. Your words are very extreme.

 

You don't seem to recognize the enormity of what you're doing to your girls. Your choices will have a huge impact on the rest of their lives.

 

Have you had any professional help, medications, therapy? I'm currently taking meds for anxiety after my experiences. I'm not being rude. I desperately needed help with the PTSD type symptoms.

 

So many things about your thread are concerning. You posted here for a reason... Are you sure that you're ok?

[Lois_Griffin]

I despise cops myself, so I understand your hatred for cops. No argument there from me.

 

 

What I am shocked about is that you went back to your POS wife after she lied to the authorities to get you and your son legally kicked out of the house. No doubt because she probably had visions of moving her loser boyfriend in or at least being available for him.

 

 

Why in the hell would you go back to a lying POS like that?

 

 

But I had to laugh. Let's get real. People who live in Mexico aren't living the good life. Most are scraping by and living all around oppression and poverty and disease and on and on.

 

 

Of COURSE some guy from America is going to be very popular with the ladies! LOL!! Why do you think they're coming by the thousands across the border? For our Philly Steak Sandwiches? They see you as a huge ATM and a way to get out of their dreary lives, for God's sakes. It ain't rocket science (or Physics). Of course you're going to be popular there. Hell, the Elephant Man would get a ton of action there if he had money (and compared to them, you have 'money').

 

 

Run that same dating profile here in the United States and watch how many responses you get. I'm guessing very few, because most women here aren't praying for someone to rescue them from a sh*t life.

 

 

Personally, I couldn't care less what you to do to your wife. She deserves no respect at all. Why you didn't divorce her lying, cheating ass is simply beyond me.

[anika99]

When you are looking for your next wife down in mexico are you planning to be honest with them? Are you going to be upfront about being a married man who is planning to cheat his way through the divorce? Or are you going to deceive these women into getting involved with you through telling them lies and half truths? Or are you going to be looking for the woman who is perfectly fine with screwing a married father? do you really want a woman like that?

 

If you go through with your plans to use an OW to affair yourself out of your marriage and abandon your daughters in the process then you are truly just as despicable as your wife

[StBreton]

Shattered - I'll only be leaving my two daughters to teach in Mexico - my two sons are from my first marriage and they are both in university. But I'm more than truely planning: my contract is signed and I can't wait to go. In all honesty, the fact that I get to leave in just 6 short months from now is the only thing that gets me out of bed in the morning.

 

My D-Day was 7 months ago and emotions were really running high the first few months but everything is calm now. My wife will certainly have a lot to juggle between work and taking care of the kids - I don't know how she'll manage and she has expressed her anxiety about that. But then again, did she give even half a seconds thought to how my son and I were going to manage when she had us removed from the house? I survived without her help and dealt with homelessness so she'll just need to survive without my help.

 

Like I said before, my wife thinks we are reconciling and maybe it will work out that way. I want to see what's out there just like she did. If I meet someone and I fall in love then I'll proceed to divorce. Until then, most of my salary goes to my wife. I'll take what I need to give her the rest. Child support is as up in the air as the future of my marriage.

 

I'm going though and I can't wait!

I never should have come back to this ****hole USA and this biggest of all Nazi-run ****hole called Indiana! I'm going!

 

You say you're a teacher? That's scary ...and quite frankly you seem unhinged. I get that some awful things happened to you ... But not being in your home when the argument occured that led to the TRO ... Us LSers can't determine if it was ordered due to valid reasons or because you appeared and came off as unhinged as you are on this thread. If the latter is the case, I can see why your wife was frightened. But ... Your not caring for what happens to your dependent daughters as you dart to another country with plans to engage in an affair for vengeance speaks of your lack of character and extreme and unstable emotional status. Please get therapy to process what has happened and learn to temper your emotions. You're acting like a rabid dog.

 

I feel for your son ...he'll forever carry the memory of being put out of his home. So very sad. I hope you got some therapy for him...please tell us you did. Did he do anything or say anything agressively toward his stepmom?

Edited January 23, 2016 by StBreton

[M1ke12]

Shattered - I'll only be leaving my two daughters to teach in Mexico - my two sons are from my first marriage and they are both in university. But I'm more than truely planning: my contract is signed and I can't wait to go. In all honesty, the fact that I get to leave in just 6 short months from now is the only thing that gets me out of bed in the morning.

 

My D-Day was 7 months ago and emotions were really running high the first few months but everything is calm now. My wife will certainly have a lot to juggle between work and taking care of the kids - I don't know how she'll manage and she has expressed her anxiety about that. But then again, did she give even half a seconds thought to how my son and I were going to manage when she had us removed from the house? I survived without her help and dealt with homelessness so she'll just need to survive without my help.

 

Like I said before, my wife thinks we are reconciling and maybe it will work out that way. I want to see what's out there just like she did. If I meet someone and I fall in love then I'll proceed to divorce. Until then, most of my salary goes to my wife. I'll take what I need to give her the rest. Child support is as up in the air as the future of my marriage.

 

I'm going though and I can't wait!

I never should have come back to this ****hole USA and this biggest of all Nazi-run ****hole called Indiana! I'm going!

 

I remember when I wanted to leave my family. I certainly idealized any notion I had of leaving too. I had this weird daydream of living homeless and only surfing in Australia. I look back now and think, wow I was kind of unstable lol.

 

I think your there. Mexico might be a huge disappointment.....what then? Maybe it will be a great experience who knows.

 

Point of all this is, you need to see that you need some balance BEFORE you make these major life decisions.

[higgsboson]

I had this weird daydream of living homeless and only surfing in Australia.

 

I plan on learning how to surf and I don't see a problem with that!

I also feel stable.

 

Some of the advice I'm getting seems like it was written by a Martian; it just goes to show how different people see the world differently. For example, as far as my daughters go, I can't live my life based on the poor judgement of my wife.

 

I agree it will be very easy to meet a young thing in Mexico because I'll bring a relatively large salary to the table and again, I don't the problem with that. What's wrong with say a 28 y/o Mexican woman deciding to marry a 55 y/o American based on him bringing a stable income to the table. Women do that all the time and American women do it just like Mexican women.

 

As far as the 2x4s I been getting - I don't get it! My wife did what she did and now she is going to get a consequence. She'll have a hard road to hoe for a few years. If nothing else, it might restore some of the respect I lost for her and even things up between us.

[katielee]

 

even things up between us.

 

are you ok being a person who needs things even? Because scorekeeping is not usually how relationships succeed... even if the relationship has ended.. why?

[higgsboson]

are you ok being a person who needs things even? Because scorekeeping is not usually how relationships succeed... even if the relationship has ended.. why?

 

The "evening up" isn't the main thing - don't forget I'm going to Mexico to find me a wife so its just plain fun too.

[afoolto no end]

You will only go to Mexico and create a whole new set of problems for yourself.

You think it will easy with a younger woman with her kids or more kids for you at your age. Why?

As far as your now wife, she sounds like she has made a number of really bad choices as well..........

Maybe it's just best you leave each other alone, divorce and the both of you can find new lives......

I am sure once your in Mexico, your wife will move on with someone else as well....she will need support as well........

it is not easy being a single mom.......

I would say go to Mexico and just give yourself time to regroup and this time make sure you find someone closer to your own age to spend a good life with.......a real love this time where you can let go of all the anger you have going on....and just enjoy your later years......work on being a good dad....

So much has gone wrong and so much hurt and disrespect has happened to you

You need to just let those people go and be a good man............

You sound like you could be the one doing the hurting with the next woman, getting your revenge to get even or try something new. hurting someone else is wrong and that is what you will be doing.........right now you have trust issues that need to be worked on first...anger issues........when you come out of all of that you might be with someone you don't want to be with or got yourself into a new life that really isn't you........take some time to think about it........

[BettyDraper]

I don't think that jumping into another marriage will solve anything.

You have children to be concerned about. Please prioritize their safety and emotional health above all.

I understand that you are very hurt and you want to seek revenge on your wife. However, you need to focus on divorcing her and rebuilding your life before finding another wife.

[sandylee1]

If I were you..I'd just divorce her.

What she did was out and out nasty and evil. I would not want to be with the kind of woman who can do this.

 

First you are clearly plan B.

Second what stops her from doing it again when she has another affair?

 

Your wife didn't stop at having an affair...she decided to go one further and get the law involved. You don't need a wife with zero loyalty who would sell you to the dogs.

 

In your position I'd protect my finances and divorce her amicably. She sounds vindictive enough to make up more stories about you and try and stop you seeing your daughters. She may even injure herself and report you for it.

 

It's better to be single than with her....then you can have all the Latinas your heart desires.

 

I can understand you wanting to get with another woman though.

[66Charger]

Do you love your daughters?

[higgsboson]

Of course I love my daughters - they are about the only thing I got out of the marriage but I can't live my life based on my wife's poor judgement when it comes to my daughters. I've heard exactly this type of argument before and it only makes me feel guilty for about two minutes.

[TX-SC]

Okay, so I'm going to just leave your daughters out of this discussion. In reality, I don't blame you for wanting this. Your wife was an absolute bitch during her affair and even wrongfully accused you of abuse. If your goal is divorce, then I would recommend doing that FIRST, but you want to keep the wife on a leash while you test the waters. Okay, fair enough. I think she deserves it. But why look for a new wife? Just find one or two good steady partners, Keep your freedom. Sure, you might find a young woman looking for a sugar daddy, but you also run a high risk of getting a cheater that way. Certainly not a soul mate. Be a sugar daddy if you want, but do it as a single man. Then, if she cheats you don't have to pay her in a divorce.

 

As a single man, your choices are always up to you. You don't have to entertain anybody else's BS. Want to go on a cruise? Freaking go. Nothing stopping you. Want to pursue a new woman in three months, go for it. Don't trade your problems for more problems.

[66Charger]

Of course I love my daughters - they are about the only thing I got out of the marriage but I can't live my life based on my wife's poor judgement when it comes to my daughters. I've heard exactly this type of argument before and it only makes me feel guilty for about two minutes.

 

Then what will you teach them now? I am right with you on everything else. The fake charges and focing you and your son into homelessness deserves consequences. Maybe a betyer course of action would be to teach your daughters that her behaviour, nor the behaviour you seem intent on pursuing, is the right way to handel this situation. It's up to you. Dont become her. Your daughters are not your wife nor the state of Indiana. Don't stay married, but stay a true father.

 

I will take my leave and wish you and your family well

[BetrayedH]

Revenge affairs always work out. And just like you plan.

[strugglinghubby]

I just read through this thread, you actually sound like a teenage (i.e. 14 year old) boy. Oh poor me this, poor me that, my wife did this so I'm going to get her back etc etc. Man for gods sake grow up, yes you were hurt, every BS has been hurt like you wouldn't believe. But you know what, real men find a way to pick themselves back up and start really appreciating life and those around them that actually mean something to them. You just seem so full of hate and anger, I actually think your daughters would be far better off not living with you. That is not what they should see as the main male influence in their life.

 

And here's a prediction for you - you leave and go to Mexico with these wild hopes and dreams of picking up a hot 28 year old local woman because you bring a decent wage. But you know what, they all see you for the bitter, twisted and hate filled individual that you are at the moment, and any decent women want absolutely nothing to do with you.

 

I hate to break it to you but you're really sucking at life at the moment.

[66Charger]

One of the things that will happen is that thru-out all this mess, your daughters will look at you and see how you handle this. Later in life, they may choose a man like you.

 

What man do you want that to be?

[TrustedthenBusted]

I probably know more about affairs than most people and what I've found is that women tend to have affairs when they are thinking of leaving a marriage.

 

Women huh?