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Doomed to be alone?


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impatiently_patient
Hot women yes. But not that many and they are all mostly just full of themselves.

 

If they get too cold, they could always move here to Scottsdale. They'll fit right in. :bunny:

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Again, one of my female friends (gaming friend from BF4) said "I went to spy on your facebook profile. You are very handsome man! How come you're being single? There should be a line waiting for you"

 

Darn it.

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Hot women yes. But not that many and they are all mostly just full of themselves.

 

Sounds like east coast Australia!

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It will definitely be hard to attract a high quality GF when your main recreation is video games. It would be better to branch out to socializing, sports and outdoor activities (snowshoing or sauna?), cultural activities like theater and museum, cooking classes, volunteering etc. That's where you can meet women. I recommend you decide how important video games are vs. having a female companion.

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It will definitely be hard to attract a high quality GF when your main recreation is video games. It would be better to branch out to socializing, sports and outdoor activities (snowshoing or sauna?), cultural activities like theater and museum, cooking classes, volunteering etc. That's where you can meet women. I recommend you decide how important video games are vs. having a female companion.

 

I do sports. I go to gym 2-3 times a week, i go running 2-3 times a week etc.

 

I can't really afford going out much since i am unemployed, so i just have to enjoy things that are "free". I rather save money for a gym membership than 1 night outside clubbing.

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I do sports. I go to gym 2-3 times a week, i go running 2-3 times a week etc.

 

I can't really afford going out much since i am unemployed, so i just have to enjoy things that are "free". I rather save money for a gym membership than 1 night outside clubbing.

 

Maybe what SoleMate is saying is that you should join a class or activity group where you work out. I dunno...maybe join a dancing or yoga class that has lots of women. Try your luck there. You'd have lots to talk about during a bite to eat since you are experiencing the same things.

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Maybe what SoleMate is saying is that you should join a class or activity group where you work out. I dunno...maybe join a dancing or yoga class that has lots of women. Try your luck there. You'd have lots to talk about during a bite to eat since you are experiencing the same things.

 

Can't really afford those classes ATM. I can even barely go to the gym...

 

But yeah, group activities would be the key mostly. You can easily make new friends. I would like to start boxing again but there are not that many women there...

 

Dancing, that would be the one. Not like freestyle dancing etc. but know, waltz, etc. real dancing.

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There are quite a few outdoor meetup.com events that are free, or have low entry fee, such as hikes and snowshoeing. Some groups ask for a very small yearly fee or donations to help with group registration fees. The city is Helsinki, but you can change that: Find your people - Meetup

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Finally had a date. With a woman around my age. And she was gorgeous. I mean very, very beautiful woman.

 

The date went...well, not too great from my part, since i am VERY slow to warm up.

So i was quite silent, maybe it was also because she was so damn beautiful. I kinda gave her the "mental" advantage already. I'm not used to dating that beautiful women...

 

But know i know i can. And i still felt pretty confy with her :) She seemed also feeling comfortable around me because she wanted to touch me and she came pretty close.

I don't think it meant anything, but you don't want to touch people you don't like, am i right?

 

We were in the movies, sitting in the last row and "hey, touch my hand, it's pretty cold"

Also i think she "sniffed" me, her nose touched my chest. so she came pretty close.

 

But i smell nice so i have no problem there.

 

Anyway, last words from her was "Lets keep messaging and good night!" Well, i usually know what that means...

 

But still it did miracles to my self confidence. If a women of that caliber even wants even to date me, i have nothing to be afraid of.

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Finally had a date. With a woman around my age. And she was gorgeous. I mean very, very beautiful woman.

 

The date went...well, not too great from my part, since i am VERY slow to warm up.

So i was quite silent, maybe it was also because she was so damn beautiful. I kinda gave her the "mental" advantage already. I'm not used to dating that beautiful women...

 

But know i know i can. And i still felt pretty confy with her :) She seemed also feeling comfortable around me because she wanted to touch me and she came pretty close.

I don't think it meant anything, but you don't want to touch people you don't like, am i right?

 

We were in the movies, sitting in the last row and "hey, touch my hand, it's pretty cold"

Also i think she "sniffed" me, her nose touched my chest. so she came pretty close.

 

But i smell nice so i have no problem there.

 

Anyway, last words from her was "Lets keep messaging and good night!" Well, i usually know what that means...

 

But still it did miracles to my self confidence. If a women of that caliber even wants even to date me, i have nothing to be afraid of.

 

Fantastic news! Its always good to read these positive stories and I hope she does keep in contact!

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Lucky me! She even answered me in whatsapp!

 

Last evening i asked her "so, are you still interested about going to the observatory with me?"

 

And when i woke up i had a message in my phone "good morning! I stayed up late, i still watched another movie and i had a restless sleep. Sure, stars interests me ^_^"

 

Well...things are surely starting to get interesting again. But i have to keep my cool. I have a bad habit of turning my throttle in to 110% Afterburner mode when i get interested in someone. I still don't know her that well, and she doesn't know me.

 

But it's a good thing she replied like that :) Usually women i have met have disappeared after first dates...

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Ok, i had a second "date" with her today.

 

We went out for a walk. We talked this and that and walked for almost 2 hours. We even had a cup of coffee at a cafeteria.

 

Anyway, we walked around and hen we went to this pitch black path...

She walked in front of me, she put her arms behind her so i could grap them and she led me safely forward :D Then suddenly she put her arm around my waist and it put mine on hers...

 

Then she took me into this small tower to "have a nice view". That's funny, she used my tactics! I have usually taken my dates to a bird wathcing tower..since those are pretty romantic places. Nice views, just 2 persons in the middle of forest.

 

Anyway... I noticed i enjoy being around her. I guess she is interested in me? I mean she came pretty close to me again, touching me etc. Apparently she feels safe with me. :)

Edited by Protec
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  • 3 weeks later...
If you are unemployeed, how are you able to date and pay bills and such?

 

Finnish women don't expect the guy to pay for them on dates. Most of them are hesitant to let you pay when you try to. Dating in Finland is also not like it is in America, where guys are expected to pick up their dates and go to expensive places. In Finland everyone uses the highly functioning public transport system or just walks, excessive displays of material wealth are more likely to be frowned upon.

 

On the flip side, Finnish women seem to be rather difficult date partners otherwise, you can never know what will please them - they like making a fuss over the most random things. I am attractive, athletic, employed, confident and well-spoken, there is never a silent moment on my dates, and yet the percentage of anything more serious coming out of them is ridiculously low. Good luck OP.

Edited by Leucine
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Oh. I guess i am not dating...i thought wrong. Silly me...

 

I mean, i've slept with her, at her place, she has been here overnight, i've seen her kids, played with her kids, we have made out in front of her kids...

 

Then we discussed about new year's eve... at first we were supposed to spend it together, then suddenly "what if you as your friends, i mean, if i decide to go at my friends cabin for a party?".

 

WOW.

 

Just. WOW.

 

That is unacceptable. Now she does not answer the phone anymore, she doesn't reply to my whatsapp messages.

 

What in the hell happened?!

 

Just today she sent me pictures of her playing with her kids!

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So I hope these kids are like, 1 or 2, if you were making out in front of them. Otherwise, talk about unacceptable.

 

Well...we just kissed and hugged. Nothing too greasy. You know, those gentle type kisses :)

 

Her kids were 3 & 7....so yeah. The kids may wonder where did i suddenly disappear and why the old guy who disappeared is back again :D

 

Yes. I am single, still. I kinda considered myself taken for a while but... well. Maybe better this way.

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Saw dreams about her all night...

 

I really wonder does she miss me at all... i doubt not. Even though she said we had wonderful time together...

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Oh. I guess i am not dating...i thought wrong. Silly me...

 

I mean, i've slept with her, at her place, she has been here overnight, i've seen her kids, played with her kids, we have made out in front of her kids...

 

Then we discussed about new year's eve... at first we were supposed to spend it together, then suddenly "what if you as your friends, i mean, if i decide to go at my friends cabin for a party?".

 

WOW.

 

Just. WOW.

 

That is unacceptable. Now she does not answer the phone anymore, she doesn't reply to my whatsapp messages.

 

What in the hell happened?!

 

Just today she sent me pictures of her playing with her kids!

 

So....if I'm reading this correctly she changed her mind and decided she wanted to spend New Years Eve with her mates instead of you, whom she has not known that long at all?

 

How is that unacceptable OP? Sounds perfectly reasonable to me....

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Dude, you need to slow the **** down...

 

 

You are going to chase anyone away with this kind of approach, just chill, have no expectations and the right people will become a part of your life, don't try to force them to be a part of yours or think because you've spent a few moments together, you're anyway more important than her friends, because you're not.

 

 

The best response to her wanting to go out with her friends would have been "Sure no problem, have a great time sweetie ;)" and that's it...

 

 

I implore you to go watch some coaching video's to understand potential areas of improvement, how to be less needy for example. This may not be so obvious to you, but it's clear to us on the outside.

 

 

Good Luck and have a great New Year!

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Dude, you need to slow the **** down...

 

 

You are going to chase anyone away with this kind of approach, just chill, have no expectations and the right people will become a part of your life, don't try to force them to be a part of yours or think because you've spent a few moments together, you're anyway more important than her friends, because you're not.

 

 

The best response to her wanting to go out with her friends would have been "Sure no problem, have a great time sweetie ;)" and that's it...

 

 

I implore you to go watch some coaching video's to understand potential areas of improvement, how to be less needy for example. This may not be so obvious to you, but it's clear to us on the outside.

 

 

Good Luck and have a great New Year!

 

I did not say that to her, of course not. I said "oh i thought i was going to spend it with you but, it's ok!". Or something. Maybe i ****ed up there, i don't know. Of course i cannot be mad at her if she wants to spend it with her friends. I was just slightly dissapointed since she first said she was going to spend it with me. So i was mostly upset about the "broken" promise. I already set my plans so i was going to spend it with her. Then she notifys me so late, i don't have time to call for my friends anymore etc. so i ended up spendin new years eve alone.

 

And i took it slow. It took 4 dates even to kiss her, and few more to end up in bed. Then things started to go forward and then she left me and took her ex back. Or at least that's what she says. So things are slow again.

Edited by Protec
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You were used as the pass time guy Protec. Sorry to see it ended up that way.

I've sadly been there several times.

 

You can thank sex and the city for helping make men as disposable as a Bic razor.

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