How can you tell [you're attractive]

[ascendotum]

Leigh, if your looks are what you say they are, having an imperfect nose is not what is keeping men from you. Men pay more attention to breasts and butts than we do noses. If you have those things in spades, then you have no need to worry about your looks. Any issues you have in the dating world must stem from something other than your nose, IMO.

 

I agree. I think the nose issue is more with her dissatisfaction than men's. From the sounds of things L does not have a shortage of guys finding her attractive, and just because one ex bf was not that into her is no reason to think she was not good enough, plus also I think she benchmarks herself with her model friend. For me a strong nose (roman/jewish) on a woman is not flaw at all. Sometimes its the irregularities in people that others can find unique and actually an element of their attraction to them.

Having the op I really don't think its going to alter guys eagerness for her or now she will suddenly get a better looking/wealthier guy. If it makes her happier when she looks in the mirror then I guess its money well spent.

[neowulf]

I tend to think the 80 / 20 rule applies.

 

80% of the population are "average looking" with 20% either falling towards the "SuperModel" or "Bridge Troll" extremes.

 

They've done a lot of studies on what human beings find "conventually" attractive. I think we all have a rough "objective" view on what "HOT" looks like. For example, around 80% of men might find Kate Upton physically attractive.

 

But physical attraction isn't the whole story. While a man might sleep with a woman, it doesn't mean he'd fall in love or have children with her. There's a lot more to evaluating a mate than "how much you want to sleep with them".

[Leigh 87]

I just view myself as a cute girl who isn't gorgeous, but who does have at least some men who find me gorgeous ; and just as many find me average.

 

I do have men who find me gorgeous. Just not droves of them. But there's not a shortage with.

 

I have just as many men thinking I'm pleasantly cute and average, as I do the men who think I'm ugly or unattractive.

 

I know I'm average but I can't help but think that I'm a smidgen above average size I do have a lot of people who find me pretty ( just not MOST.some...)

 

I feel that I have found too many men that did find me gorgeous for me to believe I'm very plain or average.

 

But most men don't find me gorgeous just some. But a smidgen more men find me attractive than what the average girl would get.

 

Does that make sense? I feel a teeny but above average, with some men finding me gorgeous even but just not heaps?

[Leigh 87]

I've come to the conclusion that I am a teeny bit above average in myface because I do have straight teeth and full lips. So 6.5/10 facially.

 

The issue is my body is an 8/10. Slim but curvy in the bottom and beasts. Shapely legs.

[lgspot]

What do I think? I think your nose gives your face character. Makes you memorable.

So there ya go.

 

True attractiveness radiates from the inside, Leigh.

Don't let anyone tell you differently.

 

I just view myself as a cute girl who isn't gorgeous, but who does have at least some men who find me gorgeous ; and just as many find me average.

 

I do have men who find me gorgeous. Just not droves of them. But there's not a shortage with. ?

 

Are people attracted to you? If yes, you're attractive. This is not necessarily equivalent to being beautiful. Some people are very beautiful but not attractive, or rather plain, but have attractive qualities. Like that "star quality" that someone else mentioned.

 

And of course, you're attractive to some and not to others.

Leigh,

I've read your posts for several years now.

You have always been a "10" without ever having seen your profile pic and getting better as you age.

 

I knew a girl over 20 years ago who kept talking about getting a nose job.

I thought I was a little better looking than her, but we gravitated to each other and got together. She tore my world up in ways that aren't even legal in some states. She was amazing!

I saw her a year ago and she has definitely gotten better looking over time.

She never did get that nose job, and has two daughters that inherited her family's lucky "nose." Gorgeous girls.

All night long, guys half her age could not keep their eyes off her.

Enjoy your new nose Leigh.

 

A piece of advice from and old man Leigh: Never do anything for any guy that you wouldn't do for yourself!

[PrettyEmily77]

If you can convince yourself that you are attractive, it's very often enough to convince everyone else; so tell yourself you're attractive (before and after nose job) and sure enough, you will be .

 

 

Plenty of the male - and I'll admit, a few of the female - LS population I find really attractive (with or without photo) and it just baffles me how some of them can't see it themselves...

[Haydn]

People are attracted to all kinds of `look`s` and `Personalities`

 

If a bloke you really like spends time with you then i guess it`s because he finds you attractive. Hence you `are attractive`

 

Vice versa.

[SammySammy]

I think beauty is in the eye of the beholder. For men, I think more than looks go into what makes us attractive or not attractive.

 

I can walk into a room, not say anything, and heads will turn. Some girls will notice me and smile. Some won't be impressed. That's life.

 

Somebody mentioned Jennifer Aniston and Angelina Jolie. I don't think either of those women are attractive. Angelina has slightly more interesting features, but I don't think of either of them when I think of attractive women. Obviously, some people disagree with me.

 

I think the key is liking the people who like you. Because - to somebody - all of us are beautiful.

[elaine567]

If we take away the make up, the trademark blonde hair and her cutesy bubbly personality is Jennifer Aniston really "hot"? Is she really classically beautiful?

I guess not. Eyes too close together and a big chin

It is the whole package that people find attractive.

 

http://www.hecklerspray.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/jennifer-aniston-without-makeup1.jpg

[Grumpybutfun]

Leigh, it is time for you to grow up and stop thinking about trivial crap. I'm not sure why you fill your mind with such drivel or want to get nose jobs. You have seemed in the past to be introspective so maybe it is time you became more giving in your time for charities and volunteering. There is so much more to the world than shallow matters that doesn't matter. I can assure you that any decent guy who is deep and would make a good spouse probably would find this type of thought process a turn off.

Time to think about real stuff and not just yourself,

Grumps

[elaine567]

Leigh, it is time for you to grow up and stop thinking about trivial crap. I'm not sure why you fill your mind with such drivel or want to get nose jobs. You have seemed in the past to be introspective so maybe it is time you became more giving in your time for charities and volunteering. There is so much more to the world than shallow matters that doesn't matter. I can assure you that any decent guy who is deep and would make a good spouse probably would find this type of thought process a turn off.

Time to think about real stuff and not just yourself,

Grumps

 

I tend to agree, it is all a bit narcissistic* in the classic meaning of the word.

I am hot, I am gorgeous, I am cute, I am average, I am a bit above average, I have a great body, I am not plain,.... on and on and on...

Men find me gorgeous, men find me cute, men find me average, men find me pretty, men want to sleep with me... on and on and on...

 

*I* and *me*.

 

A friend who is a plastic surgeon told me this once about nose jobs.

I can only realistically move a nose up one notch by surgery, I can make an ugly nose into an acceptable nose, an average nose into a pretty nose, a pretty nose into a beautiful nose, but if it all goes wrong I can make a beautiful nose tumble down all the grades into the ugliest nose you have ever seen.

 

*narcissistic - having or showing an excessive interest in or admiration of oneself and one's physical appearance.

[Leigh 87]

I just posted a natural picture of my.

 

I find it better than the ones where I have a red lip or make up.

 

Do u guys think the reset cover pic with a natural look is more " attractive "

 

I enjoy playing with my look.

[Leigh 87]

I tend to agree, it is all a bit narcissistic* in the classic meaning of the word.

I am hot, I am gorgeous, I am cute, I am average, I am a bit above average, I have a great body, I am not plain,.... on and on and on...

Men find me gorgeous, men find me cute, men find me average, men find me pretty, men want to sleep with me... on and on and on...

 

*I* and *me*.

 

A friend who is a plastic surgeon told me this once about nose jobs.

I can only realistically move a nose up one notch by surgery, I can make an ugly nose into an acceptable nose, an average nose into a pretty nose, a pretty nose into a beautiful nose, but if it all goes wrong I can make a beautiful nose tumble down all the grades into the ugliest nose you have ever seen.

 

*narcissistic - having or showing an excessive interest in or admiration of oneself and one's physical appearance.

 

 

But I do legitimately have very nice lips and eyes so I'd feel more comfortable with a cute nose.

 

My big nose looks out of place with my other features that are attractive.

 

I don't want a new nose...just a version of my nose that doesn't stick out in proportion to the rest of my features or take away from them.....

 

Show my pic to your surgeon mate. He'll agree that aside from my nose, I am a pretty girl who is....cursed with a bad nose.

 

Your friend would deff see why I would want a nose that doesn't detract so much from my features.

[RedRobin]

I think it is normal for young people to be obsessed with their looks and how they are viewed by society and their peers.

 

 

It is usually a short period and a rite of passage.

 

 

Leigh, you are well past the stage in your life where you should be obsessing about these things. I used to feel, like you, that maybe I should be getting plastic surgery for this or that. I'm smaller breasted, for instance. I dunno. Time went by, I immersed myself in the things you say you enjoy (travel, volunteering, impactful work) and also met some amazing people along the way who were not 'lookers', but who were very happy and passionate about their lives and their partners. Those concerns eventually fell away. Not trying to necessarily talk you out of a nose job... but, like the others, feel that this isn't really the main issue.

 

 

I'm not a man, but I find your face very compelling. What is 'beautiful' anyway?? Noone can say. I don't think Kate Upton is beautiful. SHOCK. She looks like a Barbie doll to me. Turn the crank... and there is another one that looks JUST LIKE HER. No offense to Kate. I'm sure there are plenty of guys who wouldn't toss her outta bed for eating crackers. But whatever.

 

 

What else is going on in your life? I have this feeling that this is sort of your security blanket... a comfortable place to 'be', perhaps, because there are other things you'd prefer not to think about. Perhaps when you are feeling like this, you just need to find something else to distract you. You need a new hobby, GF.

 

 

Just my 0.02.

[MidwestUSA]

I'm happy with myself. Therefore, I'm attractive.

 

I don't give a rat's a$$ about anyone else's opinion, and I don't have a number scale. *****, I don't even have a scale scale.

 

Way too much thinking going on here.

[Kamille]

Leigh, what do you think would be different if you were (even) more attractive?

 

It seems to me like you think being attractive would give you control over something - but I'm not sure what that thing is. Why do you desire to "attract men in droves"? What would that help you achieve?

[BlackOpsZombieGirl]

Leigh,

 

At first, I was going to write a post that said, "Good luck with your nose job and I hope that it makes you feel as attractive as you think you'll become when you get the plastic surgery..." Then, I looked at your pics in your album.

 

The two pics that *I* think you look very pretty in (and even beautiful) are the ones where in one pic, you're wearing a black shirt and your lip stain is a subtle pink and you're smiling slightly. Your smile in that pic really brightens your whole face. The other one is the pic where you're laying on your bed with your cat and you seem to have a relaxed and natural smile...in both of those pics, I didn't even notice your nose! In fact, your nose really does fit your face, Leigh. Your nose reminds me of Jennifer Grey's in Dirty Dancing. I always thought she was so pretty - then, years later she got a nose job and I was like, WTF? I barely recognized her. But what was worse than that, is that she just blended in with every other woman with that kind of small button nose...and to me, she wasn't as pretty anymore.

 

 

Whatever you decide to do, I hope it helps you to feel more confident about how you look (to other men). I also hope that it helps you to start concentrating on OTHER aspects of your life that are of more value to you in general and is more conducive to your spiritual happiness. You don't have to have 'droves' of guys who think you're 'beautiful', 'hot' or attractive...you just need ONE to think so - and what you should be hoping for, more than him thinking that you're 'hot' and 'sexy' on the outside, is that he thinks you're a beautiful woman on the INSIDE too.

 

 

 

 

.

[Giggle]

Huh. I'm gorgeous. I just am. I didn't think so before I shaved my head. I highly recommend it.

[loveweary11]

Leigh, I was intrigued to see what this was all about.

 

I checked out your pics very objectively, not thinking of you as a forum member, but as someone to critique.

 

I put a pen over your nose on my screen and simulated a smaller nose.

 

Here's my 2 cents....

 

Realize I'm only trying to help. Take or leave any of this. These are things you can do, imo, to improve.

 

The nose isn't your problem. It's hair and makeup.

 

Hair: I don't feel your hair color goes with your features. The color provides no contrast with your eyes and doesn't make them pop out. I'd bleach the whole thing or go brunette. Mousey, in between hair is very difficult to work with. Also, it's quite flat. Could use deep conditioning treatment and/or keratin type treatment that brings out the shine. Also a style that gives some extra volume. It's too "plain jane" and would help you toward your goals a lot if you make significant changes.

 

Boobs: Look great. Be sure to lift them a bit... tighten shoulder straps on bras.

 

Tone: Work out a lot and eat more SoBe/Atkins style to develop a tighter overall physique.

 

Makeup: I know just enough to be dangerous here. I can see something is wrong., but I'm having trouble putting my finger on it. The eyes could be done differently to make the blue or green pop better. It's getting washed out. Wear colors that compliment your eye color too. There is sometho too basic about the eye makeup. Damn. Wish I could be more descriptive. Ill try to come up with it.

 

ps: second pic in gallery is hottest face pic from male perspective

Edited July 2, 2015 by loveweary11

[Leigh 87]

Leigh, I was intrigued to see what this was all about.

 

I checked out your pics very objectively, not thinking of you as a forum member, but as someone to critique.

 

I put a pen over your nose on my screen and simulated a smaller nose.

 

Here's my 2 cents....

 

Realize I'm only trying to help. Take or leave any of this. These are things you can do, imo, to improve.

 

The nose isn't your problem. It's hair and makeup.

 

Hair: I don't feel your hair color goes with your features. The color provides no contrast with your eyes and doesn't make them pop out. I'd bleach the whole thing or go brunette. Mousey, in between hair is very difficult to work with. Also, it's quite flat. Could use deep conditioning treatment and/or keratin type treatment that brings out the shine. Also a style that gives some extra volume. It's too "plain jane" and would help you toward your goals a lot if you make significant changes.

 

Boobs: Look great. Be sure to lift them a bit... tighten shoulder straps on bras.

 

Tone: Work out a lot and eat more SoBe/Atkins style to develop a tighter overall physique.

 

Makeup: I know just enough to be dangerous here. I can see something is wrong., but I'm having trouble putting my finger on it. The eyes could be done differently to make the blue or green pop better. It's getting washed out. Wear colors that compliment your eye color too. There is sometho too basic about the eye makeup. Damn. Wish I could be more descriptive. Ill try to come up with it.

 

ps: second pic in gallery is hottest face pic from male perspective

 

I have full lips and large ish eyes so I do want to know how to make the most of them as I am sure I could be considered attractive by some men. I know we only need ONE person to find us gorgeous , but frankly, I don't wanna be a girl that very very few men deem as attractive. . .

 

I am surprised u commented given your pechnant for petite brunette women. I am 5"6 and busy so I am not what you would consider to be attractive.

 

I have blue and green eye liner that I am looking forward to trying together to make my eye pop more. I am gunna post a pic and get people to report back.

 

You know i do have a pic of me with brown hair and blonde. The current colour is mousy because I am going blonde again from brunette.

 

Thanks for your tips I am going to try some things out.....

[Leigh 87]

The thing is, NO woman only wants the ONE man she ends up with, to be the ONLY man who found her gorgeous........

 

I am like all women. I would much rather be considered attractive by more than the very lone and infrequent man or passer by.

 

I don't want it to be a rarity that a person looks twice at me.

 

I believe I have nice lips and eyes thst do grab regular enough attention for me to be above average yet obviously I'm no beauty queen either.

 

That's what I personally see myself as. Someone that some people look twice, more frequently than the average woman but not as much as drop dead gorgeous ones.

 

My body let's me down because it is so much more venerated than my face, which isn't university gorgeous ( but gorgeous to some men). I feel like a butterface really.

 

I am definitely getting my nose job. Even if I was happily married I would get it down. I simply prefer to look more aesthetically pleasing. I derive real joy from wearing beautify colours in my clothes and looking striking when I wear heavy eye make up.

 

I don't enjoy having a long very crooked nose. I don't feel comfortable with pulling my hair up and I cannot stand my profile and it affects my daily life.

 

I would go as far as to say that my long non petite nose is what sets me apart from bring universally hot or not.

 

I have the very full lips and nice smile plus the big blue eyes... And super long lashes to boot. But it l goes to ****e due to my masculine and non feminine nose.

[Leigh 87]

Lol I have had model scounts when I was younger approach me and say that if it weren't for my nose, I'd be modelling.

 

Like most women, I have one thing that I believe holds me back. Physically.

 

Other women have their thing. Thin lips, or a crooked smile.... That is their only imperfection.

 

 

Ultimately, most of us aren't considered " attractive " by the masses and to due to ONE or two bad features.

[loveweary11]

I have full lips and large ish eyes so I do want to know how to make the most of them as I am sure I could be considered attractive by some men. I know we only need ONE person to find us gorgeous , but frankly, I don't wanna be a girl that very very few men deem as attractive. . .

 

I am surprised u commented given your pechnant for petite brunette women. I am 5"6 and busy so I am not what you would consider to be attractive.

 

I have blue and green eye liner that I am looking forward to trying together to make my eye pop more. I am gunna post a pic and get people to report back.

 

You know i do have a pic of me with brown hair and blonde. The current colour is mousy because I am going blonde again from brunette.

 

Thanks for your tips I am going to try some things out.....

 

I'm so glad you took the post in the spirit I intended it. Whew!

 

I feel you because I'm basically a male version of you with this stuff. I don't feel I have a great base to work with and have to put work in, like you are, to... as you say... go from a 7 to 9 or whatever.

 

I have asked the questions you ask of my female friends and was very happy when, for example, they told me I needed to work this or that out, wear this or that, etc.

 

I have tons... tons of females in my life and the ones that are friends, I literally go to Sephora with and whatnot.

 

So... I have found some interest in helping them improve their look to land more guys. Since I have a penis... lol.... I'm able to comment on what's hot.

 

With you, I'd focus on hair and overall color schemes.

 

You're right about lips and eyes. See... if you can find the right techniques to get those to pop (but I'm not a big fan ofthe overly loud lipstick), your nose fades into the background.

 

I really don't think you need the nose job. I feel like if everything else was popping, eye catching and brighter, your nose would be a PERFECT tiny nuance that makes you unique.

 

(note... i have a huge nose and zero problems getting attention from girls)

[loveweary11]

Jeez. Reading your last few posts, I'm starting to feel self conscious about my own big, crooked nose!!

[Leigh 87]

I'm so glad you took the post in the spirit I intended it. Whew!

 

I feel you because I'm basically a male version of you with this stuff. I don't feel I have a great base to work with and have to put work in, like you are, to... as you say... go from a 7 to 9 or whatever.

 

I have asked the questions you ask of my female friends and was very happy when, for example, they told me I needed to work this or that out, wear this or that, etc.

 

I have tons... tons of females in my life and the ones that are friends, I literally go to Sephora with and whatnot.

 

So... I have found some interest in helping them improve their look to land more guys. Since I have a penis... lol.... I'm able to comment on what's hot.

 

With you, I'd focus on hair and overall color schemes.

 

You're right about lips and eyes. See... if you can find the right techniques to get those to pop (but I'm not a big fan ofthe overly loud lipstick), your nose fades into the background.

 

I really don't think you need the nose job. I feel like if everything else was popping, eye catching and brighter, your nose would be a PERFECT tiny nuance that makes you unique.

 

(note... i have a huge nose and zero problems getting attention from girls)

 

Oh meh. Big noses on women are never attractive. Aside from the small minority of men who prefer Roman noses.

 

Justin timberlake once talked about how he has a big nose and he just rocks it. Good on him

 

But yeh I don't think I am totally plain..... I get too much attention and men who have thought I was gorgeous for me to be totally average and plain. I have features that pop out top much to be a total plain jane.

 

Am I right or am I over rating myself?????? I consider myself a cute above average girl who isn't a knock out either but COULD BE lol with the right hair and make up and aslo my nose job.

 

I am getting a hair treatment today and I am going to play with using green and blue eye liner and then i am going to show u and get your honest opinion.

 

You seem like the type of guy who would be totally honest. Unlike my male friends who of course just saying am gorgeous. Because they are my friends and like my personality.....