Women don't play by the rules

[toolforgrowth]

Some of you guys don't get how to work this.......If you want to be cheap, don't show them that side, until you have sex with them, or they are hooked on you....then you can get stingy with them.:laugh:

 

 

OK...Just kidding......

 

 

I don't understand the whole concept of this...No woman of any quality is going to like a guy that splits a bill or says at the end of the date..."well, you had two drinks and a salad...I had a burger and a coke....SO you need to give me 24.00 and Ill pay the rest"....Its lame as hell...

 

I mean, whats so hard?

 

Even women who like the chivalrous type of guy, won't go on to abuse that...Maybe some do, but that stuff always seems to balance out...

 

There are a lot of guys that think if they start dating a woman, and they arent sure if it will materialize into a relationship(or at least sex), then no way in hell are they going to pay for the whole deal...That's crazy.....

 

Show them what type of man you are....Show them that you know how to treat a woman with respect and dignity,,,If it doesn't work out, who cares? So it cost you a few dollars...At least you don't make yourself look like a cheap tightwad..

 

TFY

 

Respect is earned, not given away.

 

If you want to pay with no questions asked, then do it. No one's stopping you.

 

I choose not to.

[Woggle]

He was a great coach in his time but You wouldn't ask Vince Lombardi how to help you strategize/prepare for a football game in 2015 lol

 

Older men tend to give horrible outdated advice to younger males

 

Yup. The only ones that really have some knowledge to give are the middle aged guys who have been through nasty divorces. They are quick to warn younger single men not to end up like them.

[toolforgrowth]

Where did I say I was entitled to anything? I don't force a guy to pay for me. My point is that if a man chooses to ask me out on a date and chooses to take me to a restaurant or bar, and then chooses to go halfsies or expects me to pay for him, that's just not very impressive behavior for a first or second or third date. When you ask women out on a date do you really expect them to pay for themselves? It sure doesn't sound like it, since you allegedly pay for 99% of your dates.

 

Oh, and I wouldn't date you either.

 

 

 

Maybe you should reread what I wrote. I earn plenty of my own money and don't need anyone to hold my hand through life. It's laughable to think that expecting a man to be a gentleman and to treat a woman when he asks her out on a date is some ridiculous standard.

 

This is why it's a big deal for me: if she expects me to pay (which you do, if you wouldn't go out with a guy again because he didn't buy you something, that's an expectation) for most/all of the dates, what else is she going to expect me to buy her down the road? A car? A bigger house? A huge TV? Clothes? Shoes? Trips?

 

I didn't sign on to be anyone's ATM. Been there done that.

 

I flat out ask my dates what they think a man's and woman's roles are in a relationship. What do you think the man needs to do, and what do you think the woman needs to do?

 

Many women give lip service to being financially independent, but when push comes to shove, they're perfectly happy to reach into a man's wallet.

[SearchingForMyself]

They sound like a blast.......

 

 

TFY

 

Here's the thing..I've only dated bout 5 girls. Not a single one of them had giant boobs or a tight waist or was even the cute girl next door. Two of them were overweight and 1 was obese. 2 were taller than me.

 

I enjoyed their company so much it made me attracted to them even more.

 

Statistically speaking, there is a reason black men are more open minded in dating(though we get a bad rep for the whole not dating black women thing. Problem is most black look the other way when I told them I work min wage but I'm sure there are exceptions!). It's because we know what its like to be discriminated against and judged for something we are born with.

 

Having high standards that are impossible to reach makes one miserable. Its not settling if you enjoy it. Sheesh.

 

But gamers and oddballs are all I attract!

[SearchingForMyself]

This is why it's a big deal for me: if she expects me to pay (which you do, if you wouldn't go out with a guy again because he didn't buy you something, that's an expectation) for most/all of the dates, what else is she going to expect me to buy her down the road? A car? A bigger house? A huge TV? Clothes? Shoes? Trips?

 

I didn't sign on to be anyone's ATM. Been there done that.

 

I flat out ask my dates what they think a man's and woman's roles are in a relationship. What do you think the man needs to do, and what do you think the woman needs to do?

 

Many women give lip service to being financially independent, but when push comes to shove, they're perfectly happy to reach into a man's wallet.

 

If that is a problem with you, don't date them. If you want a super cute girl, you got to know she's valuable to a lot of guys so you need to step it up.

[toolforgrowth]

If that is a problem with you, don't date them. If you want a super cute girl, you got to know she's valuable to a lot of guys so you need to step it up.

 

Wrong. I dated a woman who used to model a while back, and she insisted on either splitting the bill, or having me pick up the tab one night and her the next.

[Hawaii51]

you got to know she's valuable to a lot of guys so you need to step it up.

 

 

But paying for her chicken shwarma isn't stepping it up.

[SearchingForMyself]

Some of you guys don't get how to work this.......If you want to be cheap, don't show them that side, until you have sex with them, or they are hooked on you....then you can get stingy with them.:laugh:

 

 

OK...Just kidding......

 

 

I don't understand the whole concept of this...No woman of any quality is going to like a guy that splits a bill or says at the end of the date..."well, you had two drinks and a salad...I had a burger and a coke....SO you need to give me 24.00 and Ill pay the rest"....Its lame as hell...

 

I mean, whats so hard?

 

Even women who like the chivalrous type of guy, won't go on to abuse that...Maybe some do, but that stuff always seems to balance out...

 

There are a lot of guys that think if they start dating a woman, and they arent sure if it will materialize into a relationship(or at least sex), then no way in hell are they going to pay for the whole deal...That's crazy.....

 

Show them what type of man you are....Show them that you know how to treat a woman with respect and dignity,,,If it doesn't work out, who cares? So it cost you a few dollars...At least you don't make yourself look like a cheap tightwad..

 

TFY

 

I've paid for dates. The one time I got pissed off for paying it was taking out a friend of mine. During the date she admitted to lying about liking me cause she missed her married man.

 

But I was a good friend, but too small for her(short)

 

Most women are going to look for men to pay, either accept it and work accordingly or opt out.

[SearchingForMyself]

Wrong. I dated a woman who used to model a while back, and she insisted on either splitting the bill, or having me pick up the tab one night and her the next.

 

My mistake. Most.

 

You just happened to get lucky.

[SearchingForMyself]

But paying for her chicken shwarma isn't stepping it up.

 

Not paying for it, in most cases, isn't stepping it up either.

[toolforgrowth]

Most women are going to look for men to pay, either accept it and work accordingly or opt out.

 

So you're basically saying that women use men for free $h!t, and to just suck it up and accept it?

 

Wow.

[Hawaii51]

 

Most women are going to look for men to pay, either accept it and work accordingly or opt out.

 

I guess I just don't find myself across the table from women with those expectations.

 

If I invite a woman to anything, I expect to cover the fees inherent in that invitation. If it's more casual, or if they insist, sure I'm not opposed to going dutch, paying next time, or whatever. I'm more appreciative of her time, than a free meal, and I'm certain she feels the same. Again, cause I normally don't end up on meeting women (as opposed to "girls") with those expectations.

[CrystalCastles]

When I say start, I meant all cheap dates until relationship status. I wasn't referring to only first dates. I've personally not had many positive experiences when suggesting low cost dates, so I'm wary of choosing them in the future.

 

Maybe you need to reevaluate what kinds of women you go for.

 

I have only ever been on cheap dates. Whether I am in a relationship of not. Besides my birthday and Valentine's day, my boyfriend has always taken me out on cheap dates. And our relationship is amazing. He's a very creative person and I always have fun on dates.

[toolforgrowth]

My mistake. Most.

 

You just happened to get lucky.

 

Nope. I'm just extremely picky.

 

I don't need a woman for happiness. I don't need a relationship to be happy. And I've had plenty of sexual liaisons while single...sex is really easy to get.

 

There are good quality women out there. Quite a few, actually. You just have to be willing to reject the freeloaders and stay single until you find one.

 

It's really not that hard.

[SearchingForMyself]

I guess I just don't find myself across the table from women with those expectations.

 

If I invite a woman to anything, I expect to cover the fees inherent in that invitation. If it's more casual, or if they insist, sure I'm not opposed to going dutch, paying next time, or whatever. I'm more appreciative of her time, than a free meal, and I'm certain she feels the same. Again, cause I normally don't end up on meeting women (as opposed to "girls") with those expectations.

 

Exactly!

 

But I like older women anyway. Like black ops...totally my type!

[SearchingForMyself]

Nope. I'm just extremely picky.

 

I don't need a woman for happiness. I don't need a relationship to be happy. And I've had plenty of sexual liaisons while single...sex is really easy to get.

 

There are good quality women out there. Quite a few, actually. You just have to be willing to reject the freeloaders and stay single until you find one.

 

It's really not that hard.

 

There's a lot of social pressure that indicates that being single means you're undesirable, and thus certain men and women push to try to find love and sex, and when they fail, they blame the women.

 

Sure, I'll agree that some women can absolutely suck. Dating sucks at times. But pushing for the wrong kind of people cause they are what society finds ideal just breeds more misery.

[SearchingForMyself]

So you're basically saying that women use men for free $h!t, and to just suck it up and accept it?

 

Wow.

 

Not exactly.

 

I'm saying that the women most of the guys complain about on ls tens to act like this and thus they either accept these certain women for who they are or don't date them and change their standards.

[toolforgrowth]

There's a lot of social pressure that indicates that being single means you're undesirable, and thus certain men and women push to try to find love and sex, and when they fail, they blame the women.

 

Sure, I'll agree that some women can absolutely suck. Dating sucks at times. But pushing for the wrong kind of people cause they are what society finds ideal just breeds more misery.

 

Who cares what society thinks? I'm not going to get into a relationship with a soul sucking succubus just because society thinks I should be in a relationship. I did that with my ex wife, and let's just say that didn't end well.

 

I'm personally never getting married again. I will die filling single on my tax returns.

 

And I've never had a woman say "I can't go out with you because you've been single for over a year." Has not happened once.

[Shining One]

I have to ask, why do all of you assume that all women (btw when you say most we all know you really mean all) "expect" to be paid for or feel "entitled" to you spending money. Do you all have some secret power of telepathy, or maybe, just maybe, do you need to relieve your poor tired shoulders of the massive chips?

When I say some or most, I mean some or most. I get this impression from women I know and dating experience. Some women use the purse reach as a test and if the man accepts her paying her half, he fails the test and there is no second date. I wish they would advertise that it was a test so I could differentiate between the women who are testing me and the ones who are genuine, but that's not going to happen. I've also dated plenty of women who don't even reach for their purse. Heck, I've dated some women who only came to the date with their phone and ID card. To me, these behaviors display a sense of entitlement.

 

On the other hand, I have met a few women who believe that women should pay their own way. Unfortunately, most of them are unavailable or uninterested. Two of them are among my closest friends.

Maybe you need to reevaluate what kinds of women you go for.

No argument here. It's a constant work in progress to optimize my people picker. My current girlfriend is a significant step in the right direction.

[jen1447]

Oh, and I wouldn't date you either.

Main takeaway from 18 page thread.

[loveweary11]

This is why it's a big deal for me: if she expects me to pay (which you do, if you wouldn't go out with a guy again because he didn't buy you something, that's an expectation) for most/all of the dates, what else is she going to expect me to buy her down the road? A car? A bigger house? A huge TV? Clothes? Shoes? Trips?

 

I didn't sign on to be anyone's ATM. Been there done that.

 

I flat out ask my dates what they think a man's and woman's roles are in a relationship. What do you think the man needs to do, and what do you think the woman needs to do?

 

Many women give lip service to being financially independent, but when push comes to shove, they're perfectly happy to reach into a man's wallet.

 

 

I like his argument.

 

It makes sense. I think the man paying is from an earlier time when men made all or most of the money, so that became the societal norm. Now, with many women out earning men, these old customs get a little confusing.

 

I think it should really be based on who is earning good money and who isn't. Let the person with the big paycheck pay.

 

In my case, I'm the guy and the bigger paycheck every time, so it's a non issue.

 

But what if we have that chick Cheryl Sandberg (sp?) taking out a college kid or even an entry level programmer? Should he pay? HELL no!

[StanMusial]

Women, on the other hand, have a very large "like group attachment", meaning they'll side with other women simply because they're women. This is not a criticism of either gender, simply an observation.

 

Not necessarily true. Plenty of times I've seen women tear each other apart over some dude. Including women old enough to know better. In "gender war" threads in an online forum they might talk a big game but reality is quite different.

[SearchingForMyself]

Who cares what society thinks? I'm not going to get into a relationship with a soul sucking succubus just because society thinks I should be in a relationship. I did that with my ex wife, and let's just say that didn't end well.

 

I'm personally never getting married again. I will die filling single on my tax returns.

 

And I've never had a woman say "I can't go out with you because you've been single for over a year." Has not happened once.

 

That's true and I commend you for it, but I am talking a bout the general mentality of guys who hate being single.

 

Just because you are the exception doesn't take away that there is still a rule!

[Toodaloo]

Who cares what society thinks? I'm not going to get into a relationship with a soul sucking succubus just because society thinks I should be in a relationship. I did that with my ex wife, and let's just say that didn't end well.

 

I'm personally never getting married again. I will die filling single on my tax returns.

 

That there shows a lot of pain and hurt... Sorry TFG but I would not want to date you because you seem so bitter and angry towards women.

 

I am sorry your Ex was a cad...

 

Takes all sorts...

[Toodaloo]

In my case, I'm the guy and the bigger paycheck every time, so it's a non issue.

 

So as a woman its not acceptable for me to want to treat you in the same way??? Regardless of my paycheck amount I still want to be able to contribute and stand on my own feet... give my man a treat every now and then!