Ralph79 Posted March 4, 2015 Share Posted March 4, 2015 I'm not saying she would be Plan B. She's his wife. He met her, felt something for her, had sex with her, made a baby with her, married her, stayed married to her. There is a history and a bond there. They married, which makes her Plan A. The problem is that he's been involved with this other woman and is in the fog. It's entirely possible he's remembering feelings and events through the revisionist history fog lens. Without the fog, seeing and remembering clearly again, he might find in his wife whatever it was he found in her years ago and during the years together since. He might remember his feelings and the marriage quite differently than he is right now. I think I would have to agree with spanz1 on the Plan B perception. The fact that she's his wife doesn't make her Plan A. The fact that the survival of their marriage might depend on the outcome of the affair, makes his wife Plan B, in my opinion at least. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
coryreply Posted March 4, 2015 Share Posted March 4, 2015 Dude, she has done you a huge favor by ending the A and cutting you off. You would be best served to let her go, get some counseling, and then move on with your life. Affairs never "work out." They're always destructive. Link to post Share on other sites
Author itiswhatitisright Posted March 4, 2015 Author Share Posted March 4, 2015 She sent me several text messages today but I haven't replied. I don't plan to. Actually despite the stupidity I have exhibited in this thread, and the harshness of some of the responses, I found this entire thing very beneficial. All of your varying perspectives seem to have shaken me out of the obsession/fog regarding this person. I just don't feel like I have the energy to ride this roller coaster any more, which is a huge departure from how I was feeling when I made this post. Clearly, it's starting to look like to me like I really do just need to move on with my life, focus on my divorce, and then focus on having balanced, loving relationships with people who are unencumbered by pre-existing relationships/marriages. A moment of clarity. Thanks everyone for all your constructive feedback. Link to post Share on other sites
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