Author Jclements00 Posted February 26, 2015 Author Share Posted February 26, 2015 It's helping that my wife is being a you know what and all it does is make me want to be happy about this. This morning she texted she forgave me for MY mistakes and wished me luck in my next relationship. If she really forgave me she would give me a chance but she doesn't care. She even lied to her kids about being at work when she's hanging with a girl who's her friend. She just irritates me a lot which is starting to make me happy to seperate. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted February 26, 2015 Share Posted February 26, 2015 Yes it is I see that as last night I tried just to lay with her in bed and just conversate about the day and she really didn't much to say and got annoyed. I will keep trying to talk to her as a friend and I plan on trying to do a lot around here this weekend such as cleaning the whole place etc. and after that if she doesn't seem to open up any I will know for sure to just get out asap and forget about her cause I can't deal with someone with a stupid attitude. Good grief, sleep on the couch. Why are you sleeping in the same bed? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jclements00 Posted February 26, 2015 Author Share Posted February 26, 2015 If anyone she should sleep on the couch. If she still gets in bed when I'm in it I sure will jump in when she is. Weird as heck I know but I don't say anything I get in bed go to sleep. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jclements00 Posted February 28, 2015 Author Share Posted February 28, 2015 So I get home after work she's laying in bed feeling bad. I bring her a thermometer and asks if I can do anything. She says she's about to get up make some soup. I ask if I can make it for her she says ok in a bowl in a tray with a flower. I heat up the soup run outside to find someone just so happened to throw almost dead red roses out. I grab a few trim them up place them on the tray around the bowl. She asks where I got them and said she was being sarcastic. Yells out to her kids who are running out the door that they wanted her home they could lay and cuddle with her. I ask if I can lay and cuddle with her she just says nope. I ask if anything else I can she says nope I'm about to take a nap. Ungrateful hateful. I bother cause I do love her but the last week of her not caring one bit is making me realize more it's best I get out. When I do get out she's off my insurance which gives me $80 more a check and off my phone plan that saves me a lot too. And she goes to the doctor every few weeks gets medicine for anxiety but that won't be my problem when she can't afford it without insurance. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted February 28, 2015 Share Posted February 28, 2015 So I get home after work she's laying in bed feeling bad. I bring her a thermometer and asks if I can do anything. She says she's about to get up make some soup. I ask if I can make it for her she says ok in a bowl in a tray with a flower. I heat up the soup run outside to find someone just so happened to throw almost dead red roses out. I grab a few trim them up place them on the tray around the bowl. She asks where I got them and said she was being sarcastic. Yells out to her kids who are running out the door that they wanted her home they could lay and cuddle with her. I ask if I can lay and cuddle with her she just says nope. I ask if anything else I can she says nope I'm about to take a nap. Ungrateful hateful. I bother cause I do love her but the last week of her not caring one bit is making me realize more it's best I get out. When I do get out she's off my insurance which gives me $80 more a check and off my phone plan that saves me a lot too. And she goes to the doctor every few weeks gets medicine for anxiety but that won't be my problem when she can't afford it without insurance. 1)You should not have offered to make her soup. Big mistake. 2)A rose? Really? She was being sarcastic and you misread her cruelness as affection. Stop trying to please her, woo her or whatever it is you're doing. Tell her as soon as she's better she can bunk up her kids in one room and she can sleep in one of their rooms, that she isn't welcome sleeping in the bedroom anymore. This woman is LAUGHING and thinking you're a fool. Your marriage is over and she's treating you like SH.T and you still give her puppy dog attitude (mushy, still show love/affection) and she eats it up, then shi.ts it out all over you. Good. And from now on, stop being so attentive to her needs. She couldn't give a crap about yours. you think if you were sick, she'd make you soup and bring it to you? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jclements00 Posted February 28, 2015 Author Share Posted February 28, 2015 Good points. She wouldn't give a care if I was sick. She makes me sick sometimes and things like this make me glad to get out. I deserve better I deserve to make myself happy and stop trying to make an ungrateful girl happy. Link to post Share on other sites
beach Posted February 28, 2015 Share Posted February 28, 2015 Borrow that money and move now - this weekend. Stop trying to be her friend - she's not a friend. No reason to please anyone who treats you so terribly! The taxes. It's for last year (2014) right? If you were married that year I'd guess you'd file married. But assume she will take that refund before you can get to it. A smart move would be filing it and diverting the refund to an account in your name only. You earned that money right? Since you're separating and you earn it then take the refund as your own. Waiting to move for the refund you know she's going to take is a waste of time. Get moved now. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jclements00 Posted February 28, 2015 Author Share Posted February 28, 2015 The refund goes into my account so I have control over that. She wants half cause I claimed her and two of her kids. I can't move right away I'm not financially able and I would have a lot to borrow so waiting for taxes is most reasonable right now. I still have to find a place first and get some furniture so I'm not on the floor. I am looking at places and have spoken to cable/internet company to find best deals to save me money as my current cable company charges more than I want to pay. Since she wants me gone I agree to it but on my terms and where I go has to be a decent place, I won't settle for the first junk hole I find and I need to have some furniture be able to buy food and household items. I need a comfortable move and the time and money to do so. Link to post Share on other sites
LoveMyCat Posted February 28, 2015 Share Posted February 28, 2015 I don't understand all your concerns about making her comfortable, happy, etc...if she is not doing the same for you. You need to move out, any way you can. Stop catering to her needs and whims, only to be insulted. Just go. Life goes on. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jclements00 Posted February 28, 2015 Author Share Posted February 28, 2015 That's just the way I am cause the love I do have for her that caring is still there. I can't just be ignorant to her and treat her the way she treats me. That only makes it worse while we still live together. I know it won't make a difference but I will act better regardless. Now when I'm gone I may not be so nice but until then I just want to keep the peace and have things so smooth until I'm out. I'm not sure about her being able to get alimony she said she doesn't want it and is working plus gets child support. All I did was pay rent cable internet phone here. I don't need to treat her as she does me and her get mad at try to get money from me she don't deserve. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jclements00 Posted February 28, 2015 Author Share Posted February 28, 2015 One more thing. What this girl doesn't realize is she is my insurance which she needs to go to the doctor and get meds. Once I'm gone she is off and it saves me a lot of money. Plus she had been getting food stamps when i met her and never told them she was married so she could keep getting them. I asked her if she ever told them and she got scared that I would report her. I said I wouldn't but she doesn't know if she pisses me off enough I sure will. Plus the fact that I don't have to agree to move out not until I'm ready and I can screw her over if I so choose. All because she comes home yells at me for not getting toilet paper when she just got off work from freaking Walgreens which has toilet paper! Link to post Share on other sites
beach Posted February 28, 2015 Share Posted February 28, 2015 What medicine does she take? Is she mentally unstable? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jclements00 Posted March 1, 2015 Author Share Posted March 1, 2015 She takes meds for anxiety and used to take for depression. I think she could be mentally unstable at least she probably was before I met her. She just started working after 3 years of doing nothing. When I met her she was trying to survive on just child support and food stamps raising three girls. She was behind a month on rent and her cable and Internet were cut off a week after I met her. I paid off the rent she couldn't and moved my cable over. I don't know if she'll make it better now that she's working but I still feel so sorry for those kids cause they know it'll be harder without me here. Link to post Share on other sites
Friskyone4u Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 It is painful to read what you are going through. I hope you are out of there shortly. Understand this. Her kids are not your kids and whatever happens to her is not your fault . Now , your wife needs more than meds for depression if she has not figured out how her financial positions not going to deteriorate rapidly once you are gone. You seem to be totally confident there is not another man out there but if they is true she probably should be put away for her own safety she is so stupid. You are unfortunately the good guy and are still in the fog of trying to hold on to this relationship. She does not deserve you so stop buying her presents , giving her soul if she is sick or anything else. Treat her exactly the way she is treating you. You have to accept she is not coming back and you will be better off not supporting her and her kids . Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jclements00 Posted March 1, 2015 Author Share Posted March 1, 2015 I know I will be better off in the long run. It's my first marriage her second and we did it pretty quick. It's only been almost three years but I was trying to save what I thought was worth it. I see it more everyday it'll never work and I get more excited to have my own place with my own things doing what I want without dealing with the aggravation she gives me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jclements00 Posted March 2, 2015 Author Share Posted March 2, 2015 Now this girl is telling me if I don't move out when I get my taxes in a month she can get a lawyer to make me move. But she's worried I will screw her by not giving her half my taxes since I claimed her kids and that I won't pay back the rent I'm behind on. I'll give her half the taxes but paying the rent she won't be able to do anything about since I won't live here. So that rent I'm backed on would be on her to pay. She wants the seperation to be civil and I told her if she tried anything stupid I would fire right back. I doubt it'll come to blows but she has to remember I have every right to stay here as she does and she already knows when I move out I'll be better off financially and she'll be worse. Stupid girl I shouldn't have married! Link to post Share on other sites
Survivor12 Posted March 2, 2015 Share Posted March 2, 2015 Now this girl is telling me if I don't move out when I get my taxes in a month she can get a lawyer to make me move. But she's worried I will screw her by not giving her half my taxes since I claimed her kids and that I won't pay back the rent I'm behind on. I'll give her half the taxes but paying the rent she won't be able to do anything about since I won't live here. So that rent I'm backed on would be on her to pay. She wants the seperation to be civil and I told her if she tried anything stupid I would fire right back. I doubt it'll come to blows but she has to remember I have every right to stay here as she does and she already knows when I move out I'll be better off financially and she'll be worse. Stupid girl I shouldn't have married! Claiming the kids on your tax return does not automatically entitle her to 1/2 of your return. If you were the sole wage earner & you supported the kids, you are entitled to claiming them as dependents. (Also, the amount of your return is based on how much you paid in (what was withheld) during the year; therefore, the tax "savings" would be the difference between what your tax would have been without the deduction & with it. That difference could be more or less than the amount of your return.) As for the rent, moving out does not absolve you from your debt. She &/or the landlord can hold you responsible in small claims court. In fact, if your name is on the lease, you can be held accountable for at least part of the rent even after you move out until the lease term ends. If you are on the lease or are tenants-in-common, she cannot evict you. If the lease is in her name, in most states she would have to serve you with an eviction notice before taking legal action. It would be wise for you to consult an attorney to find out what rights and obligations you have instead of assuming. Many offer free consultations & it would be worth your time to take advantage of it. (By the way, it is possible that you could be held responsible for participating in welfare fraud.) Once you find out where you stand legally, you can make decisions on how to proceed based on what is best for you, not on emotion & supposition. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jclements00 Posted March 2, 2015 Author Share Posted March 2, 2015 My name is not on the lease as far as I know I don't remember signing a lease cause she was already here when I moved in. As for taxes she thinks she's entitled to half cause it's her kids but the only income she had the past three years was child support. I'm pretty sure my landlord would not do anything if I refused to pay what I owe just make her pay it as I get along with him way better than she does and he wI'll be disappointed when I leave cause before me he had trouble with her being able to pay cause she was too lazy to get off her ass and get a job. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jclements00 Posted March 4, 2015 Author Share Posted March 4, 2015 I am now really seeing how much I don't like being with this woman and her kids. Her kids never listen they are so messy they don't do what they are told like tonight their mom left a note to pick up all their clothes piled up on the love seat in the living room soon as they get home from school and they didn't. I hate being in a dirty living room I will throw away their junk they leave laying around before I'm gone. No one cares or can keep a small apartment clean to save their life then my wife says I'm dirty but none of that is my stuff laying around. Link to post Share on other sites
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