writergal Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 Great advice. Fashion week is coming up, which means dealing with a lot of oversized egos. Good time to sharpen my skills. I wish there was a book similar to How to Win Friends and Influence People but written for cutthroat industries where different rules apply. There is. It's called "Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy." The answer to every problem is: 42. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
hoping2heal Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 If you're picking up that I'm a little cavalier about the ethics of it, then you're right. I didn't cause her or her company any damages, and even her colleagues thought she was overreacting. It would be another story if I had spread it all over the internet or if it had been an unreleased screenplay, but I showed it to one trusted friend outside the industry. Sorry but no amount of scolding is going to convince me that what I did was some terrible sin, especially when I saw her sharing audition videos with her own friends. I'm sure you and everyone else in this thread has made far worse mistakes. Do I regret doing it? Yes. But only because it could have jeopardized my professional future. That's the truth. Yeah, no. My response wasn't about scolding you nor was I attempting to convince you that what you did was some terrible sin. What you did was unprofessional and while there are much worse things one could do, if I'm looking to hire a casting director am I going to pick one who can behave professionally or not? Ya know? Most people want a professional in their industry. The fact that your boss who you have already described as not behaving like a professional does it or not is a moot point, the fact that her colleagues over reacted or not is again, a moot point. You were fired for unprofessional behavior and you seemed to have not gotten that memo. You have given excuse after excuse as justification for what you did and the title of your thread blames your boss - well no, had your old boss explained to new boss why you were fired and had that led to you losing an opportunity with new boss - then no, it wouldn't be your old boss sabotaging you. It would be your reputation for un-professionalism that cost you a job. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author tuxedo cat Posted January 17, 2015 Author Share Posted January 17, 2015 (edited) Yeah, no. My response wasn't about scolding you nor was I attempting to convince you that what you did was some terrible sin. What you did was unprofessional and while there are much worse things one could do, if I'm looking to hire a casting director am I going to pick one who can behave professionally or not? Ya know? Most people want a professional in their industry. The fact that your boss who you have already described as not behaving like a professional does it or not is a moot point, the fact that her colleagues over reacted or not is again, a moot point. You were fired for unprofessional behavior and you seemed to have not gotten that memo. You have given excuse after excuse as justification for what you did and the title of your thread blames your boss - well no, had your old boss explained to new boss why you were fired and had that led to you losing an opportunity with new boss - then no, it wouldn't be your old boss sabotaging you. It would be your reputation for un-professionalism that cost you a job. "Most people want a professional in their office." Then none of the people I know in the industry right now would have jobs. If she wanted a professional in her office, she would have fired my supervisor. Edited January 17, 2015 by tuxedo cat 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author tuxedo cat Posted January 18, 2015 Author Share Posted January 18, 2015 That other casting director finally got back to me. She said she'd been swamped all week and that they're still working on a tv pilot, but the film projects should be warming up soon and she'll get in touch when it does so we can work together more. Link to post Share on other sites
anna121 Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 Because my boss was having me work overtime and on weekends she had him do something on my computer to add access to the company's server when I was outside of the office. He used this connection to screen share my home laptop and confessed to looking through all of the files on my computer some of which were very personal, hacking my email and facebook accounts...all because he was trying to see if I was involved with other guys. This went on for months. He continued hacking into my computer even after I was fired and he had promised it would end. Did you consider going to the police? I think this is against US federal law, no? Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted January 19, 2015 Share Posted January 19, 2015 Vultures have smelled blood They disgust me every time. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Anela Posted January 19, 2015 Share Posted January 19, 2015 Anyone who remotely disagrees, is a vulture? I responded as I would have to anyone else. I've thought about posting more, in another one of tux's threads, but I was hesitant to in case it was met with more talk of vultures. It's a way in which I think I can relate, but my thoughts were better formed the other night. Since it probably won't be one-hundred percent lovey-dovey, and will concern private matters of my own, I might PM you Tux. Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted January 19, 2015 Share Posted January 19, 2015 I didn't mean you Anela, your advice was sincere and helpful. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tuxedo cat Posted January 19, 2015 Author Share Posted January 19, 2015 (edited) Did you consider going to the police? I think this is against US federal law, no? I did at the time. I was furious and frightened. I've never had my personal life invaded like that. The night I found out what he had done I was so distraught that I roamed the streets disoriented, and when a police car stopped to ask me if I was okay I burst into tears. Anyway, after some thought I realized that seeking legal action would probably only damage my professional future. I've been reluctant to reveal much about what happened online because I know he read all of my online accounts, including LS. He told me he wanted to learn as much about me as he could to "understand" me better. I was afraid he'd threaten or harass me even more if I said anything bad. Enough time has passed that I hope he has stopped following my online presence. Edited January 19, 2015 by tuxedo cat Link to post Share on other sites
Author tuxedo cat Posted January 19, 2015 Author Share Posted January 19, 2015 (edited) Anyone who remotely disagrees, is a vulture? I responded as I would have to anyone else. I've thought about posting more, in another one of tux's threads, but I was hesitant to in case it was met with more talk of vultures. It's a way in which I think I can relate, but my thoughts were better formed the other night. Since it probably won't be one-hundred percent lovey-dovey, and will concern private matters of my own, I might PM you Tux. No, Anela. I appreciate your input. I do think vulnerable threads often attract a few vultures, but this is sadly the nature of online discourse. It's fine to disagree but when somebody keeps needling and aggressively pushing their agenda in a non-constructive way (which you don't do), it gets into shadier territory. It's often more about tone and patterns of behavior than content. When it reaches the point where you start asking yourself. "hey, this is going a little far and seems rather obsessive. Is this person really trying to help or do they have other motives -- ego-tripping, currying favor from other posters, whatever?" then you know you're probably being harassed. Edited January 19, 2015 by tuxedo cat Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts