What are the top ten things you look for in a partner?

[IronZ]

I would say...

 

1. Someone who shows interest (like you've seen me say in other threads). Someone who wants to be there in my life and wants to be a part of it.

 

2. Having similarities/things in common.

 

3. Intelligent, witty, funny, can make good conversation, makes me laugh.

 

4. Someone who has their life together. I'm over dating immature girls.

 

5. Fun, spontaneous, adventurous. Someone I can have a good time with.

 

6. Someone who isn't overbearing or controlling. Lets me have my space when I need it, but is there when I need her.

 

7. Honesty is a good virtue. Loyalty. Someone who won't think twice about hurting me in any way. I've been cheated on before and it hurts really badly.

 

8. Beautiful. In my eyes of course. I don't care what anyone else thinks of her, but I need to think she's beautiful.

 

9. Someone who is caring and kind. Someone who will treat me well.

 

10. Takes care of herself, and won't just expect me to do everything for her. I'm not her father, so she shouldn't wait for me to raise her. She should have goals and ambitions, should strive to have a good job, make her own money, be her own woman and not have to rely on anyone else. I want someone who is strong emotionally and mentally.

[Haydn]

Understands the `offside` rule.

 

Appreciation of `Cask` ales.

 

Looks knockout in my `Replica` footy tops (Those lounging Sunday mornings)

 

Can read and understand a `Tube`, map. (Especially District and Circle lines.

 

Knows her `Cheeses`

 

Likes the odd `Aria`

[singsparkles]

Understands the `offside` rule.

 

Appreciation of `Cask` ales.

 

Looks knockout in my `Replica` footy tops (Those lounging Sunday mornings)

 

Can read and understand a `Tube`, map. (Especially District and Circle lines.

 

Knows her `Cheeses`

 

Likes the odd `Aria`

 

 

 

 

Very unique, Haydn.

[Gaeta]

I will leave out honest, loyal and the like because it's a given, who does not want an honest and loyal partner.

 

1. Good sense of humor - witty

2. Considerate - polite - diplomat

3. Emotionally strong

4 Hard working

5. Integrity

6. Selfless

7. Family oriented - I prefer a father

8. Passionate - sexual - no sex hang-ups

9. Attentive - affectionate - demonstrative

10. Has personal pride

[Andy_K]

1) attractive, hot

2) high sex drive

3) into sport or exercise

4) open heart

5) open mind

6) likes kids and animals

7) has some sort of geeky side - movies, video/board games, anything like that

8) good tempered

9) good communicator

10) easygoing

[d0nnivain]

I love the "always sends me roses after we make love" ... That would be perfect!

 

Oh dear. I was being sarcastic. I said that as an example of what NOT to put on the list because it is superficial.

 

Wanting a caring guy is fine. Demanding this exact behavior is problematic.

[singsparkles]

I will leave out honest, loyal and the like because it's a given, who does not want an honest and loyal partner.

 

1. Good sense of humor - witty

2. Considerate - polite - diplomat

3. Emotionally strong

4 Hard working

5. Integrity

6. Selfless

7. Family oriented - I prefer a father

8. Passionate - sexual - no sex hang-ups

9. Attentive - affectionate - demonstrative

10. Has personal pride

 

 

...Selfless is a great one! Hard to find.

[singsparkles]

Oh dear. I was being sarcastic. I said that as an example of what NOT to put on the list because it is superficial.

 

Wanting a caring guy is fine. Demanding this exact behavior is problematic.

 

 

I've never had that done before, but would still be cool.

 

I don't think I would demand that behavior, but if it was done, I would have no qualms.

Edited October 16, 2014 by singsparkles

[singsparkles]

I find it kind of weird I have been commenting on Phoe's threads and giving paragraphs of advice yet she likes everyone else's comments but mine, yet comes on my threads and likes everyone else's comments but mine. LOL... just an observation. It's cool. I try to help.

[IronZ]

I've never had that done before, but would still be cool.

 

I don't think I would demand that behavior, but if it was done, I would have no qualms.

 

Sending a girl flowers for any other occasion would be sweet. Sending flowers to her after having sex? A little creepy lol.

[singsparkles]

Sending a girl flowers for any other occasion would be sweet. Sending flowers to her after having sex? A little creepy lol.

 

 

Lol, call me a sapp... I'd take flowers at any given moment and wouldn't think it's creepy. Maybe I'm a little far out and eccentric.

[me85]

In no particular order:

 

1)affectionate (good kisser)

2)funny

3)smart

4)loyal/committed/FAITHFUL

5)music/movie lover (nerdy)

6)same political & religious views as me

7)adventurous/spontaneous

8)emotionally mature

9)ambitious/hard worker

10)will never abuse me physically, emotionally, or psychologically

[singsparkles]

In no particular order:

 

1)affectionate (good kisser)

2)funny

3)smart

4)loyal/committed/FAITHFUL

5)music/movie lover (nerdy)

6)same political & religious views as me

7)adventurous/spontaneous

8)emotionally mature

9)ambitious/hard worker

10)will never abuse me physically, emotionally, or psychologically

 

 

 

Number 10 is so important, Me85. You have helped me in realizing that!

[me85]

Yes it definitely is. I'll never be in an abusive RS again. Ever.

[TigerLilly78]

1. very intelegent but not a ego maniac because of it..

 

2. Kind and considerate to some degree..

 

3. Clean and able to pick up after himself..

 

4. Not addicted to anything negative IE drugs drinking..

 

5. Not a mommas boy! or overly attached to his family that he cant think for himself..

 

6. Has some sort of a stable income and is willing/happy to contribute to our home..

 

7. Not a man whore (this doesn't mean having a high sex drive) it means he doesn't feel the need to stick it in anything that walks by..lol

 

8. Good personal hygiene showers at least once a day..

 

9. Being able to cook is a nice bonus..

 

10. Must like animals to some degree..

 

11. Being a bit of a homebody is good as I hate clubs and don't do bars..

 

12. Non smoker....I could deal with it but ide rather not if possible..

 

Lucky me my guy completely ticks off about 11 of these boxes right out of the gate plus hes adorable...

[me85]

5. Not a mommas boy! or overly attached to his family that he cant think for himself..

 

For sure. Been there, experienced that. It was God awful.

[chimpanA-2-chimpanZ]

1. Kindness

2. Honesty

3. Respect

 

These should be non-negotiable. If a dude is ever mean to you, even once, kick him the hell out. Now, assuming you have these basic things, you can get picky.

 

4. Brilliance

5. Self-awareness

6. Curiosity

7. Humor

 

My only lasting relationships have been with men who are frighteningly smart. There are drawbacks---they're usually a tad awkward, or they're not quite as emotionally aware---but I love dating someone who can always teach me and vice-versa. (My current boyfriend is both a genius and very much in touch with his feelings. It freaks me out.) I want a guy who makes me laugh and who also wants to try new things.

 

If you have all of those things, it's hard to want much else. Honestly, ten feels like a lot. I guess I'd add...

 

8. Reliability

9. Financial stability

10. It

 

The last one is the most important one, and is so much more meaningful than all these lists. It's not just about all the nice things he does for you; it's about the sparkling, crazy chemistry that sets the foundation for everything else. There's a reason why so many couples say they met and they "just knew it was right".

[ComingInHot]

So many great lists!

I keep trying to put one together but get stuck I think because of what I am going through right now. But for thread's sake:

-faithful/honest

-kind (no screaming mantantrums please)

-Brave

-Stong in body and spirit

-Good work (& play) ethics

-Confident in himself & in me (he knows he's smart & handsome and thinks I am too)

-Protective of me & our relationship

-Communicates intelligently and with witty banter when the times calls

-Someone who will give as much of his heart as I will (that's a-lot just so you know*) to me & our families

-Adventurous/dominant yet stable both in & out of the Bedroom

 

That's all. So by next month mid November, if you know of a man with the above qualities, Sign me up! (Maybe mid November next year possibly when I'm supposed to be ready per others who have been through a D )

CiH*

[todreaminblue]

someone understanding of others

 

 

compassionate

 

kind

 

courageous

 

selfless

 

generous hearted

 

logical mind to balance my emotive sensitivity

 

dominant but fair

 

loves kids

 

altruistic

 

patient

 

 

honest

 

 

straight up

[Tayla]

And for most of the contributors of this post ....this was an actual study done in college in psyche class. It was asked of the students.

 

I had forgotten how you can tell alot about the persons response. those who are "contributing" to the relationship and those who are wanting to take from the relationship.

 

Example: 'I want the guy to give me flowers' ( this person is basically saying...I want to be the taker) There by the guy is to contribute. or 'I want the girl to be more sensual in the bedroom'....There by the girl is the contributor and the guy the taker...

 

I still marvel at the responses ...... there is truth in the saying..opposites attract and like attracts like.

Figure out which category you fall into, and then tap into it when forming the relationship. Some folks actually balance out the relationship. One is usually more giving and one is more taking. Nothing wrong with that provided their nature is to do so. I can even tell by some of the responses who are in their dating prime and those who have gone thru the rituals and fine tuned the preferences or standards. Again there is no right or wrong answer, its an indicator of where you see yourself in the relationship and how you see the potential mate in order to form the healthy relationship or maintain it. We each have a mixture, yet one side is more predominant. When I tested thru this course, it was "giving " to be the strong side...which side would you say you are in the equation based on your posted response....? think about it when next you ask your partner what they are looking for....you'll get the gist if they are self giving or self taking.....

[jay1983]

1. Doesn't have a long list of demands

 

2. Isn't self centered and dying for attention.

 

3. Has interests in things other than reality TV and social media.

 

4. Is somewhat attractive and isn't bigger than me.

 

5. Appreciates what she has and doesn't take people and things for granted.

Edited October 17, 2014 by jay1983

[singsparkles]

1. Doesn't have a long list of demands

 

2. Isn't self centered and dying for attention.

 

3. Has interests in things other than reality TV and social media.

 

4. Is somewhat attractive and isn't bigger than me.

 

5. Appreciates what she has and doesn't take people and things for granted.

 

 

 

I love your number 3. That's so hard and rare to find nowadays! So refreshing when you meet someone who isn't into reality tv and the internet drama.

[singsparkles]

1. very intelegent but not a ego maniac because of it..

 

2. Kind and considerate to some degree..

 

3. Clean and able to pick up after himself..

 

4. Not addicted to anything negative IE drugs drinking..

 

5. Not a mommas boy! or overly attached to his family that he cant think for himself..

 

6. Has some sort of a stable income and is willing/happy to contribute to our home..

 

7. Not a man whore (this doesn't mean having a high sex drive) it means he doesn't feel the need to stick it in anything that walks by..lol

 

8. Good personal hygiene showers at least once a day..

 

9. Being able to cook is a nice bonus..

 

10. Must like animals to some degree..

 

11. Being a bit of a homebody is good as I hate clubs and don't do bars..

 

12. Non smoker....I could deal with it but ide rather not if possible..

 

Lucky me my guy completely ticks off about 11 of these boxes right out of the gate plus hes adorable...

 

 

 

TigerLilly,

 

Great list. and I'm happy you've found your prince charming seemingly.

 

I'm such a homebody as well, and I wish I could find a guy who is the same way... in your mid 20s its kind of hard to find men who want to sit around on Fri and Sat nights, which sucks! I'd rather be home with my significant other than party.

[mightycpa]

• always send me roses after we make love (but only when I'm in the mood)
  

In the mood for the roses, or the lovemaking? I always get confused by that.

[WhatIsLove2014]

I'm such a homebody as well, and I wish I could find a guy who is the same way... in your mid 20s its kind of hard to find men who want to sit around on Fri and Sat nights, which sucks! I'd rather be home with my significant other than party.

 

I TOTALLY agree with this! I'm a super chill person. Takeout and Netflix with my SO is a good night to me. Like you said most guys in their 20s aren't into that. Booo.