MrMeh Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 Age may not always dictate wisdom, but it can be one of the requirements to certain felonies. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lernaean_Hydra Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 Oh good lord, I'm younger than you and he's still too young for me. Get your head out of your vagina lady, this is disgusting. You realize give year ago, when you were what, twenty, he was ONLY in fifth grade!? When you were his age, he was likely still wetting the bed. Let that sink in. Settle down there Mary Kay Letourneau. Have you ever had sex with a teenage boy!? They are terrible at it. They can barely maintain healthy, romantic relationships with girls their own age - because teenage boys are emotionally undeveloped! - let alone with a grown woman. I mean, say you went out with this kid...what the hell would you even have to talk about? I mean I get being "mature for his age" but I doubt he has the maturity of a man in his mid-20s. Ugh, no. No to everything about this. Bad idea, abort mission, abort mission! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 look at your title OP "teenage boy".... Just wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
yellow_sun Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 OK, I understand why this is difficult for you. You've allowed yourself to develop feelings for him and now you've got all sorts of hormones and emotions going on making it hard to be rational, but you have to stop and think. This is a bad idea that you will regret. Don't act on your feelings. Think about acting on your feelings until the hormones subside and you realize what it would actually be like dating/sleeping with this kid. I'm 27 and working on a second degree in university. Most of the people I study with are 18-21. There are some pretty cute guys in my classes, and I do talk to them because I like to be social, but as soon as they open their mouths it becomes painfully obvious that even these guys are still KIDS, and they're 3-6 years older than your crush. Actually, maybe it would be good for you to talk to this guy some more. Meet up with him a few times and DO NOT flirt with him. Just talk to him, try to get to know him, what his interests are, what he likes to do besides martial arts. I'm gonna bet that the more you talk to him, the less you're going to feel attracted to him. There's nothing wrong with thinking he's attractive, but leave it at that and move on. Try meeting some new guys that are closer to your age and you'll forget about this kid in a heartbeat. Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 I'm into him because he's cute, seems very mature for his age, and we have at least one passion in common, plus chemistry which makes me irresistibly curious about him. I don't think the maturity of the 15 year old is in question here, OP. I'd have to wonder where you are in terms of your own emotional and mental development to even consider this. Maybe you need more depth in your own maturity. I just want to date him casually and non-exclusively, absolutely NOT a serious relationship. Do you actually think a 15 year old is able to comprehend what you desire or even be able to handle your expectations? Has it ever crossed your mind -- what happens if he gets attached, what happens if you break his heart and it messes him up emotionally, what happens if his parents get involved, what happens if the school finds out, etc.? Seems like you're only in this for you. My girlfriend's son is 16 and as good looking as he is, intelligent and responsible, mature and aware -- she still has to find him clean underwear, she still packs his lunch bag, she still has to tell him to make his bed, she still has to tell him to put away the video games. He's still a kid. Date someone your own age. It doesn't matter whether it's legal or not -- sometimes common sense and a moral code should be what dictates right from wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
TheGuard13 Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 Let me just say...Nice. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
cif Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 15 years old boy and mid twenties woman? your stories are really too familiar to me .. The Garden of Words - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia Ha! Guess she'll need a different plot! Link to post Share on other sites
xxJuliexx Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 Umm...how can you even relate to someone who is 15 years old and you're in your twenties? That makes no sense to me. Even on a intellectual level, it would feel like hanging out with a kid. Ewww! I don't care how mature he is, even a mature 15 year old, is nowhere near a mature 20 something year old. Stay away from that kid. For multiple reasons, One. Let's just say you both hang out and have a good time, but what if you wanted to break it off and he wanted to be spiteful? He could turn around and take you to court and you would probably have "Sex offender" on your record, and/or go to jail, because you would be considered a pedophile. I'm sorry but you are a pedophile. You like someone sexually that is underage. I hope you know it will cause nothing but trouble and suffering if you hook up with this kid. Nothing good can come of this. Either wait till he's legal or forget about him, because otherwise it's ****ing weird. I'm sorry. Link to post Share on other sites
snowflakes88 Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 No. Just no. No, no, no. Link to post Share on other sites
xxJuliexx Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 I don't get why people think this is so wrong. I remember being 16. If a (reasonably normal, not creepy at all) 25-year-old that I liked had gotten to know me a little back then and thought I was good enough to date, I would have been flattered and very interested. I was also mature enough to make my own decisions and not be pressured into anything. That's different when a 16 year old girl likes a guy that is way older. However, it's usually just a crush and then it fades away. You should never over step that boundary. I know when I was 15, I liked guys that were 20 or 25, but see I wasn't developed intellectually to tell myself "If I try to pursue these guys, it would be wrong" I pursued these guys, but luckily they rejected me and told me that they are too old for me, but see it's up to the mature adult to set the record straight. Because the teenager doesn't know any better, but YOU do. You should have enough common sense that this is wrong on so many levels. Please...I am sorry but I am creeped out by your post, and I think you should seek therapy, because you seem like a pedophile and I don't want it escalating. I am not saying seek therapy like you're crazy, I am not trying to sound judgemental, but seriously you need to nip this in the bud. You are trying every which way to disregard everyone, and go after this kid, and it's just not right, my friend. Like I said wait till he's legal or forget about it, and if you start to like other boys that are underage, then please please get therapy and see a psychologist. Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 Princess, this is one of those situations where a lot of people are going to beat you up just to show everyone else how great their morals are, but at the end of the day you're not hurting this guy by expressing sexual interest. Unless you're somehow forcing yourself on him. Once he's 16 just try and get him alone sometime and see what happens. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 Princess, this is one of those situations where a lot of people are going to beat you up just to show everyone else how great their morals are, but at the end of the day you're not hurting this guy by expressing sexual interest. Unless you're somehow forcing yourself on him. Once he's 16 just try and get him alone sometime and see what happens. She's taking a huge risk of hurting herself (her acceptance in the community she seems to value). Communities do not look kindly on adults who mack on the the kids! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 She's taking a huge risk of hurting herself (her acceptance in the community she seems to value). Communities do not look kindly on adults who mack on the the kids! Even when they catch these female teachers 20 years older than princess they rarely take it to the jury, because they can't find 12 people who think the guy was the victim of a crime. Communities are a lot kinder to women than men in that regard. If it even becomes public knowledge that is. I'd bet a good 9/10 of these situations don't. Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 Even when they catch these female teachers 20 years older than princess they rarely take it to the jury, because they can't find 12 people who think the guy was the victim of a crime. Communities are a lot kinder to women than men in that regard. If it even becomes public knowledge that is. I'd bet a good 9/10 of these situations don't. I'm not talking about criminal charges. I'm talking about her being welcome in her Martial Arts community. Chances are, she'll be persona non grata at every dojo in town. Word spreads quickly among parents and kids. Link to post Share on other sites
BeholdtheMan Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 In the past, society worked differently. No sh*t Sherlock. That's what I said... Mostly because most people died before the age of 40/50 and 'grew up' faster.That's why I said "times have changed" Today, 15 years old is A KID....and 16 is the age of consent. Your point? If you think sex between a 25 year-old woman and a 15/16 year-old boy is necessarily evil...well, I'd have to disagree. There are plenty of mature 15 year olds (just like there are plenty of immature 15 year olds). Sex with an older woman wouldn't necessarily be damaging. It would however be illegal at 15. So much wrong here.Are you perhaps referring to your reading comprehension? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 We live in Canada. There is no law here against people hanging out as friends, regardless of their ages, so no unlawful behaviour going on at all. And I had no idea he was a kid until someone told me. He looks and acts older. I just want to hangout with him once when we'll have time to actually talk, so I can get to know him better and find out if he's worth waiting for. If he turns out to be a typical teenager... then forget it. Worth waiting for???? Times cannot be that hard. I mean the whole concept of waiting for fruit to ripe when it comes on to people is bizarre. Why wait for him? Date other people. Are you really gonna sit around waiting for him to come of age??? You also said you just want to hang out so I don't see why you'd wait just for that. I'm gonna admit I don't get the appeal. I'm in my twenties and can barely fathom dating anyone 23 or under...much less 15 or 16....I mean he is in high school! How will this work? Where can you go? What can you do? How can you introduce him to friends and family? He can't drink or even legally go to certain places...shoot he may not even have a driver's license! I dunno...for so many logistical reasons this might be a hassle. No matter how mature he seems there will be lots of real life barriers besides just his mentality... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGuy Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 I don't get why people think this is so wrong. I remember being 16. If a (reasonably normal, not creepy at all) 25-year-old that I liked had gotten to know me a little back then and thought I was good enough to date, I would have been flattered and very interested. I was also mature enough to make my own decisions and not be pressured into anything. You assume this child is far more mature than his age. You, my dear, are in for a world of effing hurt.....I promise you. You are treading in water that may end up bringing the wrath of God (and some really ticked off parents) on your head. Not to mention public humility and possibly jail time. But hey, what do you care!? You need your lust satisfied no matter the consequences to others. Right? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BeholdtheMan Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 I'm in my twenties and can barely fathom dating anyone 23 or under...much less 15 or 16....I mean he is in high school! How will this work? Where can you go? What can you do? How can you introduce him to friends and family? He can't drink or even legally go to certain places...shoot he may not even have a driver's license! I don't think she wants to actually date him. More like no-strings-attached consensual sex. I'm pretty sure the typical 16 year old guy would find casual sex with an attractive 20-something woman appealing. Once the boy turns 16, it's legal. I find it laughable that some are labelling it as a heinous evil. If my 16 year old son willingly had sex with a 25 year old woman, I wouldn't immediately jump to the conclusion that his youth had been grotesquely defiled. Depending on his attitude toward the encounter, I might be inclined to give him a high-five. Of course, non-consensual sex would be an entirely different matter. Let's not pretend that there's no difference between this situation and the reverse (older guy, teen girl). For a guy, it would unlikely be a source of shame. More likely, it would be a source of pride, something he'd brag about to his peers. That's the way guys are. Men are glorified for sexual conquests. Women are shamed. Let's be honest about this situation. It's not that black and white. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
adam_vt Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 It sounds to me like you're taking advantage of him. You had better tell him that all you want is casual sex, or at least that you are dating other guys. You might be his first relationship. To an experienced woman like you it might be "oh, la te da, I can see as many guys as I want because I'm liberated", but to him, it might be a lot more serious. Unless you have the guts to explain your position up front, something like that is the reason good men turn into women haters. Link to post Share on other sites
Diezel Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 Hey, I say go for it. You'll make this kids' life while ruining your own, but as the stupid kids say nowadays, "YOLO". Right? Link to post Share on other sites
boilingpoint Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 (edited) I don't think she wants to actually date him. More like no-strings-attached consensual sex. I'm pretty sure the typical 16 year old guy would find casual sex with an attractive 20-something woman appealing. Once the boy turns 16, it's legal. I find it laughable that some are labelling it as a heinous evil. If my 16 year old son willingly had sex with a 25 year old woman, I wouldn't immediately jump to the conclusion that his youth had been grotesquely defiled. Depending on his attitude toward the encounter, I might be inclined to give him a high-five. Of course, non-consensual sex would be an entirely different matter. Let's not pretend that there's no difference between this situation and the reverse (older guy, teen girl). For a guy, it would unlikely be a source of shame. More likely, it would be a source of pride, something he'd brag about to his peers. That's the way guys are. Men are glorified for sexual conquests. Women are shamed. Let's be honest about this situation. It's not that black and white. Where do you women get these ideas? Imagine OP was a guy instead - I guarantee you'd have a 20 page thread of diatribes with people crying rape, pedophilia etc. Guys get VERY bad rap on these things. Anyway back to OP. I think guys are potentially much more vulnerable when a relationship ends because they're just gonna be told to man up and deal with it, no matter what they're feeling and how one should deal with it. Meanwhile often the chick just forgets about it all and hops on another guy's dick... So that's what I am saying to you. If this kid is mature and ready for casual sex, as you seem to think, then go for it. Just make sure you're open and honest with him about intentions etc. If he understands everything, is up for it and 16yo, then it should be fine. Edited October 2, 2014 by boilingpoint 2 Link to post Share on other sites
martaldn Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 whats wrong with people of your age? too old? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 Where do you women get these ideas? Quite an interesting assumption, given that the poster you responded to is quite obviously male. But yes, please go on about 'us women'. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
boilingpoint Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 Quite an interesting assumption, given that the poster you responded to is quite obviously male. But yes, please go on about 'us women'. Haha! Point taken. Link to post Share on other sites
randomnerd Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 You are looking for to date him casually and non-exclusively. At 15/16 he may no be emotionally equipped to keep it as casual as you'd like even if he may think he is. I say leave him alone. You're just casually dating anyhow. Date other people. Why open this can of worms? Link to post Share on other sites
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