Feeling Like You Could Nail The Interview If You Had Your Time Over?

[Leigh 87]

I didn't get the call centre job and I didn't care lol. I wanted the money plain and simple, I would have had to have quit when college started and I was stressing over not having the chance to remain in a long term role, and having to find other work once studying.

 

Only me and two other women missed out. Out of over 10 people. No experienced was required for the roll lol, and some people turned up sloppily dressed, without washing their hair.

 

Where as I was dressed in a professional business attire and blazer, with my own style of bag, and in the debate we had to have to demonstrate how we would "think on our feet" my debate points made sense and I had a lot of ideas, where as other people floundered and didn't even make relevant comments?

 

I am not a hot shot, I don't get jobs easily, however; I really don't think they were looking for high calibre staff! Just.... yeah. I know a person who is sloppily dressed when I see them. What's more, some people arrived late.....

 

One well spoken Uni grad got the job but most of them had either no experience or they were sloppily dressed and did not come across as very professional or articulate. In real life I do dress flawlessly and take great pride in my business attire and make up included.

 

No one wanted the job either - us three girls all hated the idea of calling people and trying to sell things to them...

 

I really wanted an income but I would have definitely quit once a retail based position came up that would be a viable long term job throughout college.

[Leigh 87]

I had an interview in a show store I really liked with a really nice manager.

 

When I answered the phone for the phone interview he said " you have an excellent phone manner"

 

He then went on to say " we need the right people, I think a person like you, for the business"

 

I came in immediately for a face to face interview... That is where I lose it.

 

I wasn't BAD, but I find it hard to be totally polished, softly spoken and elegant, and straight to the point in everything I say!!!!!!!!!

 

I wasn't bad but I am not sure I nailed it or had the it factor he was after:(

 

A great shame, it would have fitted around Uni.

 

 

 

 

 

 

He wanted my references, he said he would call them and based on them, I may get a second interview or immediate start or not.

 

 

 

 

 

 

He didn't, however, give me a time frame:(

 

 

 

 

 

I think if I had nailed it, he would have given me the job then and there, so he is either undecided or ..... he felt something was a bit amiss and wants to interview more people and will then likely find someone with the "it factor" he is after:(

 

 

 

 

 

 

Damn it I am desperate to work, and work a job that I can KEEP during college, why is it so hard to get a basic bloody entry level job so I can work whilst study?

 

 

 

 

 

 

Working has become such a privilege, even crappy call centres want "certain types" of staff, LOL.

[GemmaUK]

Hey Leigh, calm down ((hugs)).

 

OK, let's forget about the call centre interview. You didn't want the job anyway.

 

The show store. What is a show store? Is it like a showroom for electrical appliances or something like that?

 

You wanted that role, you might still get it, you don't know yet.

You say you had problems at the face to face stage.

 

Can you describe what actually happened?

 

What did you talk about?

 

I'm trying to help by picking this one apart to see how you can move from feeling like you have said all the wrong things when what actually might be happening is that you 'think' you have said all the wrong things while still in the interview room as disappointment might show up in you before the end of the interview. It is possible that this is happening without you being aware and honestly I can understand that as you're having a tough time.

 

I've waffled many a time in interviews and had a brief thought of 'what on earth did I just say??!!' but actually, I was just being me. If being me isn't OK then I wouldn't want the job there.

A lot of times just confidence in being yourself or laughing off that you have just waffled is actually the way forward - it shows you're human but also that 'this is me' and 'I'm happy with me'.

[Mascara]

What about cleaning jobs? They're available everywhere, and usually the kind of hours that will leave you free to go to interviews elsewhere.

[Leigh 87]

What about cleaning jobs? They're available everywhere, and usually the kind of hours that will leave you free to go to interviews elsewhere.

 

 

 

I have tried everything.

 

A lady at a party told me she gave everyone a chance based on gut feeling.

 

She told me I could send her my cover letter and resume.

 

I never heard back from her. My res/cover letter were professionally crafted.

 

I have not looked for cleaning jobs for a while and I am looking to be more active.

 

I also enjoy cleaning lol I have had cleaning roles before.

 

I will now start looking for cleaning jobs again.

 

I gave up when I didn't get any call backs.

 

Many companies want experienced cleaners only.

 

Most companies require your own transport.

 

Retail jobs don't require a car. You can just get to work via train.

[Mascara]

You probably come across as over qualified for cleaning jobs if you're doing a degree and vocational certificates. Why not offer to clean some neighbours houses for free in return for a reference. Or put some cards up offering cleaning-laundry services for an hourly fee.

[Leigh 87]

Hey Leigh, calm down ((hugs)).

 

Thanks:) lol. I needed that after incessant rejection from every job I apply for. Although I get some good feedback I never make it past the "final" interview. Cos, you know, ALL retail jobs that are so much nicer than the cleaning toilet types of roles, ALL have like... 2 or 3 interviews!!!!!!!!!

 

I have gotten through first interviews and I have received some great feedback.

 

At an interview for the retail phone store that would work around my Uni hours, the manager said upon me leaving " to give you some feedback, you did well, we were impressed!"

 

OK, let's forget about the call centre interview. You didn't want the job anyway.

 

No one really did. Three of the girls including the ones who didn't get it said " as soon as I found out we would be making OUTBOUND calls and trying to tell stuff - I wanted to leave.

 

One pretty girl left the reception area before the final group thing lol.

 

I would have loved the money! But I would have looked for other roles that I could keep long term!

 

The show store. What is a show store? Is it like a showroom for electrical appliances or something like that?

 

SHOE store, LOL. My bad.

 

I did well in selling him the shoe he asked me to!

 

He carried on the interview way longer than required.

 

He wanted to call my referee's indefinitely. But he could have changed his mind, you know how managers are; they get a "gut feeling" and leave people be, people who they initially liked! Happens all. The. Time.

 

I could tell he liked me. But you honestly need that "it" factor or else there are SO many high calibre applicants that go for EVERY SINGLE ROLE:(

 

You wanted that role, you might still get it, you don't know yet.

You say you had problems at the face to face stage.

 

Can you describe what actually happened?

 

Um:o I get nervous and waffle a tad too much but nothing embarrassingly bad.

 

I am not as articulate, clear and direct and to the point!

 

What did you talk about?

 

How I loved shoes lol and retail and that I wanted a long term carer I could sustain during Uni and after - I explained I had ambitions to move up within the right company.

 

He thought it was funny that I was going to study PODIATRY :lmao:and potentially work in a shoe store:laugh:

 

Yeah we just chatted. About business, he asked me what the hardest part of selling shoes would be for me, and then I asked him what his answer would be.

 

He asked me to write down my referees'..

 

I asked him about the process, what would happen...

 

He just said " based on your referee's, you may have a second interview or..... "

 

So I may get hired right away... or NOT hired..... or get a second interview....based on my referee's.

 

I'm trying to help by picking this one apart to see how you can move from feeling like you have said all the wrong things when what actually might be happening is that you 'think' you have said all the wrong things while still in the interview room as disappointment might show up in you before the end of the interview. It is possible that this is happening without you being aware and honestly I can understand that as you're having a tough time.

 

I have a "thing" I did in the past where I nailed interviews.

 

I just said " Leigh. Be yourself. Relax. You got this"

 

And I would entirely be myself and nail it.

 

I just cannot seem to get to "that stage" lately:(

 

It is like I am nearly myself 100%, but I am nervous and desperate for a job and so I am a tad more nervous and uneasy than I normally am.

 

I've waffled many a time in interviews and had a brief thought of 'what on earth did I just say??!!' but actually, I was just being me. If being me isn't OK then I wouldn't want the job there.

A lot of times just confidence in being yourself or laughing off that you have just waffled is actually the way forward - it shows you're human but also that 'this is me' and 'I'm happy with me'.

 

Yeah but no...

 

Sometimes I say a few things that were not directly the point when I would have had plenty to say on the actual subject matter without going off on any tangents!

 

I was myself to day at the call centre thing and didn't get it which was fine as I knew I had done the best I possibly could lol.

[Leigh 87]

You probably come across as over qualified for cleaning jobs if you're doing a degree and vocational certificates. Why not offer to clean some neighbours houses for free in return for a reference. Or put some cards up offering cleaning-laundry services for an hourly fee.

 

 

 

I doubt I come off as over qualified, I was a personal trainer for a few years and I have worked in retail on and off since age 16. I was team leader once AGES ago lolz.

 

Hardly impressive.

 

I just wish someone could give me a break and let me damn clean peoples houses.

 

I admittedly haven't looked for cleaning roles ever since my last round of rejections!

 

I will deff give it a go, a LOT of people actually apply for cleaning jobs!

 

Australia, UNFORUNATELY, ahem, lets FAR too many people in on working Visas, and there is a genuine crisis atm.

 

People on working visas are taking all the cleaning, fruit picking and many of the hospitality and call centre roles.

 

They do it for less money and are eager to take on the crappy jobs.

 

Ask anyone in the service industry here in 2014: they will lament that all the visa holders are taking cleaning and hospitality roles.

 

With cleaning, it is very under the table as is café work, and working visa holders secretly do it for less than aussie residents.

 

 

 

 

 

So yeah, to brief you, menial jobs are going through a crisis right now where normal, pleasant people don't get café, fruit picking, call centre or cleaning roles due to working visa holders.

 

 

 

 

I will try to look for cleaning roles again as well as retail roles

 

I am not ready for admin - I need to become advanced on excel and the like first.

[Mascara]

I don't mean over qualified in terms of how much you've done, I probably phrased that badly - I mean that it might seem that you wouldn't want what's seen as a "menial" job if you've been a personal trainer etc. Downplay that and get some up to date cleaning experience, for free if you need to.

[Leigh 87]

I don't mean over qualified in terms of how much you've done, I probably phrased that badly - I mean that it might seem that you wouldn't want what's seen as a "menial" job if you've been a personal trainer etc. Downplay that and get some up to date cleaning experience, for free if you need to.

 

 

I have a cleaning reference.

 

When I acted as a nanny I cleaned for a family. Bathrooms included.

 

I just gave up on cleaning and hospitality as I wasn't successful, and tried other things.

 

Cleaning WOULD be flexible and active. Both appeal to me as a prospective uni student soooon.

 

 

 

 

I hadn't thought of cleaning in ages, thanks for mentioning.

 

 

 

 

I have an interview for a jewellery store on Wednesday.

[GemmaUK]

Right, I'm gonna put your replies in quote boxes...hopefully it won't end upall scruffy looking!

 

Thanks lol. I needed that after incessant rejection from every job I apply for. Although I get some good feedback I never make it past the "final" interview. Cos, you know, ALL retail jobs that are so much nicer than the cleaning toilet types of roles, ALL have like... 2 or 3 interviews!!!!!!!!!

 

You're absolutely welcome to the hugs!

Job hunting is tough and tougher just now.

It can be emotionally exhausting too...very!

 

I have gotten through first interviews and I have received some great feedback.

 

At an interview for the retail phone store that would work around my Uni hours, the manager said upon me leaving " to give you some feedback, you did well, we were impressed!"

All of this is really good and positive.

 

I have scratched out all of the call centre stuff in your post. It seems that girl who walked out had the right idea.

 

SHOE store, LOL. My bad.

 

I did well in selling him the shoe he asked me to!

 

He carried on the interview way longer than required.

 

He wanted to call my referee's indefinitely. But he could have changed his mind, you know how managers are; they get a "gut feeling" and leave people be, people who they initially liked! Happens all. The. Time.

 

I could tell he liked me. But you honestly need that "it" factor or else there are SO many high calibre applicants that go for EVERY SINGLE ROLE

 

Um I get nervous and waffle a tad too much but nothing embarrassingly bad.

 

I am not as articulate, clear and direct and to the point!

 

How I loved shoes lol and retail and that I wanted a long term carer I could sustain during Uni and after - I explained I had ambitions to move up within the right company.

 

He thought it was funny that I was going to study PODIATRY and potentially work in a shoe store

 

Yeah we just chatted. About business, he asked me what the hardest part of selling shoes would be for me, and then I asked him what his answer would be.

 

He asked me to write down my referees'..

 

I asked him about the process, what would happen...

 

He just said " based on your referee's, you may have a second interview or..... "

 

So I may get hired right away... or NOT hired..... or get a second interview....based on my referee's.

Nothing here sounds like you did anything wrong. One thing about interviews and interviewing people (which I have done) is I like to hear a bit of waffling...it means that person isn't a robot and isn't trying way too hard to be someone they aren't.

Usually I have found that interviews that go on longer tend to be better ones too.

 

I have a "thing" I did in the past where I nailed interviews.

 

I just said " Leigh. Be yourself. Relax. You got this"

 

And I would entirely be myself and nail it.

 

I just cannot seem to get to "that stage" lately

 

It is like I am nearly myself 100%, but I am nervous and desperate for a job and so I am a tad more nervous and uneasy than I normally am.

 

This bit...this is IT!

Like I mentioned you could really be giving off a 'why did I say that' look after what you see as waffling. I see a bit of waffling as that person opening up a little bit so that I can get some hint of personality.

Not being totally direct and to the point also shows personality.

You don't yet know about the shoe store so just wait and see.

 

In the meantime and what you need most right now is to find a way to de-stress and relax.

Yes you will still be looking for work and going on interviews and seeing your man etc but relaxation techniques are an essential part for when there is all of this kind of thing going on...yet it's the last thing we think of until we are at breaking point.

 

This next question/statement will tell both you and me whether you need to de-stress or not. It's also a huge first step in getting some calm back in.

I know...because it's something I am using and re-learning right now.

 

When you are posting n here, when you are applying for a role online and when you are in an interview you gotta start noticing when you stop breathing and take a breath

I mean a real deep breath(keep it to a shallower breath when in an interview or you could look bored).

 

Yes it sounds stupid and totally ridiculous. But please just try it.

When you do it (if you do it now) then you will feel tight possibly but your deep breath will not feel smooth. It will feel like you are going up and down steps inside your lungs rather than smoothly breathing in and out. It takes practice to get it smooth.

 

You know about breathing from your fitness days so you know how it can help massively and just as massively hinder. It's an easy thing to forget though and people do.

Other things like meditation and yoga can help also but start from scratch and learn to breath again.

 

Do it whenever you think about it. Another thing..it sounds dumb but deep breathing is that ((hug)) you need to give yourself...none of us do that enough these days. You need some hugs right now. x

[Leigh 87]

Thanks so much for you're words of advice GemmaUK.... It has helped.

 

I am so upset and distressed that all my friends are saving for.travel, a mortgage and they can go shopping whenever they want, and they earn 200 A DAY, when I am forced to stay on welfare which is 200 A WEEK.

 

Welfare here is more than in the US and the UK but it's not enough to save for a car or mortgage. It buys you food or shelter: not both. Sharing a place with many people and living on literally noodles and baked beans can work but even shared accommodation is 150 a week and that only levels people with 50 to 100 per week for their food and transport spending what strain of welfare they receive.

 

I'm very upset. I am desperate to work yet no one will let me.

 

And no I shouldnt have had to move to Uluru national park where I was offered a job. Having to sell my beloved cat and not see my boyfriend for six months would have made me more miserable than I am broke and at home.

 

 

 

 

I would give anything to work, just a simple job to do during uni. I am definately not asking too much.

 

 

 

 

I honestly feel like I'm simply not going to get a job.

 

It's baffling hiw people like my boyfriends sister has always been able to get a job. I have met her, she is not more attractive or more sociable than me. I mean, I couldn't notice a difference in our level of desirability.....

 

I look very European and she has a cute button nose and looks perky. Could that be why she " gets jobs " and I am unemployable????

 

I don't expect to hear back from the shoe shop. I am accustomed to receiving good feedback only to then be forgotten about.

 

I guess I was good in some ways to several interviewers, but someone was just better...which is likely considering every menial job has 200 applicants!

 

 

 

 

Oh well I have decided to stop looking g for the call centre jobs because they are ALL for full time work, and I would not have time to attend other interviews once working full time.....

 

It would be much more beneficial if I look hard for retail jobs that I can do part time or casually so that I do not have to just quit when college starts.

 

If I got a call centre job I'd have to quit when college starts and then be unemployed again.

 

I would feel SO much happier with a menial, basic, part time retail job that I knew I could maintain after college started!

 

I want a job I won't have to quit in six months!

 

I told the interview today via phone that I start college next year and therefore it women be snatch if unwashed successful since if have to quit when college started.

 

The recruiter said she was really happy with my honestly and said she appreciate it because otherwise uni students have up and quit once uni rolled around and she said it was good of me to it lie, and to not put their company in a bad position as they want full time PERMANANT staff.

 

And no, podiatry cannot be done as a night class a all, otherwise I would have totally opted to work full time and study part time on the side after working hours!!!

 

 

It's a shame my degree doesn't afford my any flexibility.

 

 

 

 

 

Fingers crossed the shoe store want me. It's a travesty that it's so hard to get work in a damn shoe store. If you met me you wouldn't think I came off as retarded - it is just THAT hard to even get a retail job in a shoe store.

 

The manager was going on over the phone about how great the company was and how they needed " the absolute top calibre staff" and staff who can " give the best, world class service, and just make things happen "

 

Like yeah dude, I am a desperate soon to be collage student, I've had a lot of retail experience in the past, I have good references and I'll work darn hard but please just cut the crap, it's retail not rocket science, desperate people need to be given a go, I would be a good worker"

 

 

At the phone store interview they said that I did well and they were impressed, but that had well over 200 resumes handed in to them and they were going to be conducting interviews DAILY for two weeks!!!!!!!

 

Even when I perform well and I am told so by interviewers, I am never that " Omg amazing " person!!!!!!

 

When retail businesses interview literally 50 people for one role, an they receive way more than 200 resumes per job, they are BOUND to get their super attractive, super charismatic people who also have loads of experience!!!!!!!

 

 

 

 

I genuinly cannot see myself becoming employed in the nest year.

 

 

 

 

I am going to focus on my retail pharmacy course and my business admin course and simply get unpaid experience in these fields until Uni starts.

 

 

 

It takes most people here 6 months to find an entry level job and they have experience....so a newbie administration wannabe be is going to take a year or make to find an entry level admin job.

 

 

It really is this bad here for entry level jobs, do not let people fool you by saying " well I just turned up to two interviews and got a job " these people are NOT representative of the majority......

 

 

I'm giving up on the work thing, I'll focus on completing my courses and getting unpaid experience.

 

Of course I will still apply for retail jobs and I'll likely attend interviews every so often but I don't believe I'll better lucky one that gets the job. I am pleasant and kind and affable enough but I am simply never the most likeable or pleasant person in the room out of 50 poeple that are interviewed and I never will be.

 

 

 

In the meanwhile people likey friend who is very attractive and inattention desirable and likeable by the corporate world will continue to get good job offers and coastal through life when people like me will never be the ones who are the most desirable in the room of interviewees.

 

 

 

I am praying that podiatry will change that. In Australia, podiatry is one of the best degrees for getting employment, not a single grad struggled to find a 50 plus K job......

 

In three years it'll likely bearded but there is still a shortage of podiatrists and apparantly, you don't have the be the most desirable and likeable person out of many applicants! Less people have the degree than the amount of people who are able to apply for retail z so they don't tend to interview 20 to 50 people for the job.

 

 

 

 

Thanks for the help guys but thus thread has come to an end. I won't be getting a job anytime soon sadly, but I'll keep applying and attending interviews for practice experience.

 

 

I believe after a year of applying daily and attending interviews I'll get job. I have very solid evidence anecdotal and otherwise for me to just know that title takes most unemployed Australians a least a year to find a job.

 

 

 

Wish me luck I definately need it.

 

Thanks so much GEMMAUK for the lovely advice!!!

 

 

 

Enjoy your jobs everyone I'd kill for the chance of a job that I could keep and not have to quit before uni, leaving me unemployed yet again. I don't think I'm admin for too much lol.

[MidwestUSA]

It's baffling hiw people like my boyfriends sister has always been able to get a job. I have met her, she is not more attractive or more sociable than me. I mean, I couldn't notice a difference in our level of desirability.....

 

I look very European and she has a cute button nose and looks perky. Could that be why she " gets jobs " and I am unemployable????

 

 

 

In the meanwhile people likey friend who is very attractive and inattention desirable and likeable by the corporate world will continue to get good job offers and coastal through life when people like me will never be the ones who are the most desirable in the room of interviewees.

 

The sooner you drop your ideas of 'desirability' and focus on actual skills, the sooner you'll find something.

 

 

Attractive, social, likable, desirable, perky? It's not OLD, it's employment.

[cerridwen]

 

I told the interview today via phone that I start college next year and therefore it women be snatch if unwashed successful since if have to quit when college starts.

 

Good Lord.

Your autocorrect does no favors...

 

I've only recently read the threads wherein you discuss your Aspergers.

I wonder if your therapist could do a mock interview with you and perhaps give feedback about any areas of communication that may be off-putting to employers.

There maybe some blind spots you're not aware of.

As you said, it's during the face-to-face that things often go awry.

Perhaps the nervousness causes your Aspergers to become more pronounced, and your shrink can help with this.

 

You appear to be putting in a lot of effort as of late. Good on you.

I hope you give yourself every advantage by utilizing a professional's input.

Edited September 23, 2014 by cerridwen

[Leigh 87]

The sooner you drop your ideas of 'desirability' and focus on actual skills, the sooner you'll find something.

 

 

Attractive, social, likable, desirable, perky? It's not OLD, it's employment.

 

 

 

My friend had no work experience and got a 50K job because they liked her and she is highly desirable and pleasant.

 

She was offered a 100K HR position the second the graduates her HR masters, when most ppl who have an HR degree start at the real bottom in admin in crappy paid jobs, and work their way into a 100k role over YEARS.

 

She is getting a highly paid job soon because they like her, not because of her reputation of skills in HR.

 

I believe it isn't rocket science or as hard as a physics degree, however, I believe my friend deserves the highly paid job because, frankly, you don't need loads of experience in order to carry out an HR job - a fast learner who has done an HR DEGREE and has experience in the workforce could easily learn the ropes of an HR 100K role.

 

My friend deserves the job but she got offered it in her first week in a call centre - because they liked her and want her, over other applicants who have had years of experience in HR and would love an 100K HR role.

 

It IS very well down to your likability.

.

I didn't get the same job despite having prior experience in customer service (she had none).

 

My boyfriends sis always got given bar work and any job she went for. These are jobs I could do yet never got.

 

People get jobs because they are desirable and easy to like, and pleasant to listen to.

 

I have seen it happen time and time again. I CAN be desirable and likable but I am never the most pleasant person in an interview - there are always people who are more pleasant and likable than me.

 

They select people who, on their resume, have sufficient skills. They narrow it down to people they LIKE.

 

I am just never the most likable person or the best fit for any job, I am never at he bottom of the pile I have been told, but I am never the best fit either. I get very good feedback for some interviews too so I cannot be the worst they see!

 

It is not about skills - thousands of people have admin skills yet it takes admin staff many months to find work simply because 400 people apply for every entry level position.

 

You don't seem to "get" how hard it is for the average person to find work.

 

You probably assume that because you and you friends and people you know found work easily enough, that it is like that for most people.

Edited September 23, 2014 by Leigh 87

[Leigh 87]

Good Lord.

Your autocorrect does no favors...

 

I've only recently read the threads wherein you discuss your Aspergers.

I wonder if your therapist could do a mock interview with you and perhaps give feedback about any areas of communication that may be off-putting to employers.

There maybe some blind spots you're not aware of.

As you said, it's during the face-to-face that things often go awry.

Perhaps the nervousness causes your Aspergers to become more pronounced, and your shrink can help with this.

 

You appear to be putting in a lot of effort as of late. Good on you.

I hope you give yourself every advantage by utilizing a professional's input.

 

 

 

Sorry I was on my phone, it is broken I will stop using it to type on here I cannot afford to fix it, I do not text people as something is wrong with the keyboard where it just types free reign without my touching the screen it is highly annoying.

 

Yes I look every day even though I am never successful.

 

What can be therapist do? I have friends. I make friends easily. I have been told honestly by randoms that I am likable and that there is nothing off about me that makes me undesirable.

 

People on trains after my said interviews have told me " frankly, I think you come across well enough and I am surprised it is taking you many months to find an entry level role"

 

Several people have told me that I am not undesirable and there is nothing wrong with my ability to make friends or interact in groups of people.

 

Fact is, it is too hard to get entry level jobs, so the most likable people get the jobs/ and people with the most experience.

 

I don't think anything is wrong with me, I just think I am the average person, and they have above average people applying who have the best personalities on offer, where as I am merely "likable" and "pleasant enough", without being the "it factor" that is ALWAYS inevitably interviewed for every job:(

 

I know people with the "it factor" about them. They are never out of work. It is not something that can be learned either, I am who I am, I am not outspoken or over bearing, but I am sociable and enjoy listening and speaking to people.

 

I don't know how to change who I am in order to make myself more likable!

 

If I was that bad I wouldn't have so many friends and people I randomly meet who I then become friends with?

 

If I was that bad I would have had so many offers from men when I was single, and I am average looking so I must be pleasant enough to have gotten enough interest.

 

I will ask my therapist for sure, she hasn't found anything off about me that is repelling people, as I would not have friends or plenty of options in men if I was that bad.

 

Generally unappealing people do not have friends, they don't have friends easily nor do they have ample dating options like I did when I was single and I still have to fend off.

 

 

 

 

 

My conclusion is that I am not awful, but I am simply never the best person interviewed, either.

[cerridwen]

I understand.

But I'm not talking about your sex appeal or how you relate to friends.

I'm talking about how you come across to employers in an interview setting, who are evaluating you on a whole other level.

 

 

What I'm proposing is critical, but supportive, feedback from a therapist who is hopefully experienced with autism.

 

S/he could be helpful by evaluating you through an employment interview lens, and suggesting anything that needs tweaking.

 

I'm not proposing that you change yourself at the core level.

 

But from what I understand, people with mild autism can benefit from coaching that teaches how to reign in counterproductive behavior that operates on a more surface level-- a level employers evaluate that friends either don't look for or care about.

 

It's just another way to ensure you're putting your best foot forward, which ultimately increases your chances at landing a job.

 

Sorry, I'm tired. Hope this makes sense.

Edited September 23, 2014 by cerridwen

[GemmaUK]

I understand.

But I'm not talking about your sex appeal or how you relate to friends.

I'm talking about how you come across to employers in an interview setting, who are evaluating you on a whole other level.

 

 

What I'm proposing is critical, but supportive, feedback from a therapist who is hopefully experienced with autism.

 

S/he could be helpful by evaluating you through an employment interview lens, and suggesting anything that needs tweaking.

 

I'm not proposing that you change yourself at the core level.

 

But from what I understand, people with mild autism can benefit from coaching that teaches how to reign in counterproductive behavior that operates on a more surface level-- a level employers evaluate that friends either don't look for or care about.

 

It's just another way to ensure you're putting your best foot forward, which ultimately increases your chances at landing a job.

 

Sorry, I'm tired. Hope this makes sense.

 

I agree with this also.

 

Leigh, you already have a source of extra help with having a therapist and it's something worth utilising.

He/she knows you and you can be completely honest about how you feel and what happens at interviews.

She might even be able to give you great advice on what to do - a trick or something to help you get through an interview feeling more 'level headed'.

I've done role play in the past with recruitment agencies - it's something that used to be part of getting onto an agencies list back years ago.

 

I think in your last few posts you have needed a rant - and that's fair enough.

I looked up on the Aussie job situation myself and there were reports saying people looking for jobs are feeling just the same as you are. You are not alone by any means...but...and it's a big but..

 

You have an advantage that you are not seeing at all

It's this:

You get interviews!

If a company did not see you as a potential they would not even give you any kind of interview.

 

So alongside trying out some relaxation - the breathing or maybe try some meditation (which can be really difficult when your mind is spinning - just to warn you) you just need some tricks or techniques to help you stay feeling yourself and confident all the way through a face to face interview.

 

Your therapist knows you and knows your condition and she could massively help you with this.

 

Just a quick PS here too. It is perfectly OK to ask an interviewer for a timeline on when you will hear back from them. I noticed you were disappointed that the shoe store manager didn't give you any idea. That leaves you hanging and it's not a nice feeling (I've been there before) plus you have no idea at all when is a reasonable amount of time to chase them up so do feel free to ask 'when do you expect to have made a decision?'.

That question also makes them see that your time is valuable to you.

[Conners]

Hey Leigh,

I hope the job search is going well. I think I have mentioned this before but sometimes it's more about who you know and not your skills. Do any of your friends or family know of any work going that could possibly give you an advantage over other applicants?

 

I've mainly worked in admin besides fast food jobs in school and I had never worked in retail ever! I wanted extra work so just asked my Facebook if anyone knew any work going and someone I had met a few times said his work needed some people (it's a car parts retail store) and luckily he was the manager so he just put me on straight away and gave me that chance even though I had never worked in retail and knew minimal about cars. I'm good at the job now after some practice but there is no way I would of been hired if I didn't know the manager!

 

I encourage you to keep asking people you know about any work going.

[Leigh 87]

Hey Leigh,

I hope the job search is going well. I think I have mentioned this before but sometimes it's more about who you know and not your skills. Do any of your friends or family know of any work going that could possibly give you an advantage over other applicants?

 

I've mainly worked in admin besides fast food jobs in school and I had never worked in retail ever! I wanted extra work so just asked my Facebook if anyone knew any work going and someone I had met a few times said his work needed some people (it's a car parts retail store) and luckily he was the manager so he just put me on straight away and gave me that chance even though I had never worked in retail and knew minimal about cars. I'm good at the job now after some practice but there is no way I would of been hired if I didn't know the manager!

 

I encourage you to keep asking people you know about any work going.

 

 

 

Yep. I have also posted on my Facebook.

 

No one is in a position to help, sadly.

 

I wish I got As lucky as you.

 

The only luck I have is that I get interviews that I never ever get past haha.....

[Leigh 87]

I agree with this also.

 

Leigh, you already have a source of extra help with having a therapist and it's something worth utilising.

He/she knows you and you can be completely honest about how you feel and what happens at interviews.

She might even be able to give you great advice on what to do - a trick or something to help you get through an interview feeling more 'level headed'.

I've done role play in the past with recruitment agencies - it's something that used to be part of getting onto an agencies list back years ago.

 

I think in your last few posts you have needed a rant - and that's fair enough.

I looked up on the Aussie job situation myself and there were reports saying people looking for jobs are feeling just the same as you are. You are not alone by any means...but...and it's a big but..

 

You have an advantage that you are not seeing at all

It's this:

You get interviews!

If a company did not see you as a potential they would not even give you any kind of interview.

 

So alongside trying out some relaxation - the breathing or maybe try some meditation (which can be really difficult when your mind is spinning - just to warn you) you just need some tricks or techniques to help you stay feeling yourself and confident all the way through a face to face interview.

 

Your therapist knows you and knows your condition and she could massively help you with this.

 

Just a quick PS here too. It is perfectly OK to ask an interviewer for a timeline on when you will hear back from them. I noticed you were disappointed that the shoe store manager didn't give you any idea. That leaves you hanging and it's not a nice feeling (I've been there before) plus you have no idea at all when is a reasonable amount of time to chase them up so do feel free to ask 'when do you expect to have made a decision?'.

That question also makes them see that your time is valuable to you.

 

The shoe guy didn't givee a time line at all. Just said goodbye.. That it was so nice to meet me.

 

I tried to ask what would happen but was met with a " I'll contact you your referees and get back to you"

 

My references were not contacted so once again, some ******* has came along and taken the job away for me. Probably one of those people who just " gets jobs " Due to being more likeable to managers than me.

 

Maybe if managers gave the average less likeable applicants a chance, the people who just " get jobs " would just " get a job " soon after, and the less likeable people like me would get off long term unemployed.

 

The people who " get jobs " should make way for the long term unemployed like me who are desperate for a simple way to earn some savings during uni. I feel like the same poeple always get the jobs and people like me are stuck as long term unemployed.

 

I wish the less desirable applicants got chance without waiting one year or more.

 

Several recruiters have told me that I am likeable enough and that there isn't anything off putting about me. I have begged them to please be more honest.. Nothing.

 

I have tried asking interviewees I never heard back for for feedback to no avail.

 

When I get given any kind of a chance I get shut down. I arranged work experience for a quiet night for profit neighbourhood centre. To carry out their admin duties.

 

I was let go after two days. They told the recruiter that I was too passionate about the role and too ambitious.

 

Like wtf. I turned up early. I dressed more professionally than all of them. And they let me go without even having the balls to explain why??????

 

The recruiter said " they felt that they would not have enough things for you to do"

 

" they want someone a bit slower basically "

 

WTF. So yeah, that's what happens when I get up early two days a week, show up early for work, dress.professionally, and take orders well. Members at the community centre came up to the desk and praised me. They all said I was such a nice girl and they told theorise working there that they liked me there.

 

So yeah I cannot even find someone that is willing to let me get bloody free experience.

[Leigh 87]

I have an interview for Zara fashion and then an interview for a jewellery store.

 

 

I never get the jobs so I don't have very high odds of getting either job

 

 

I used to be happy or excited about interviews.

 

 

Now I enjoy them but I know it isn't likey to ever land me a job. I view them as fun activities I do for practice when I graduate in three years and go for podiatry jobs.

 

 

I don't believe I stand a chance at getting any basic job. There is something inherently off or undesirable about me that no one has the balls in real life to tell me.

 

Eveny therapist says I'm perfectly normal and pleasant. Maybe I need a new therapist lol.

 

It breaks my parents hearts to see me trying so hard to secure work and never getting past the interview stage.

 

The furthest I've come is getting through the major high end department store interview. The called back the next day and informed me that I was very impressive and I got great feedback from every recruiter present..

 

It is when I got to the one on one interview in the last final round that I tanked.

 

Uuugh I wish interviews were straight forward and honest!!!!!!!

 

I would be thrilled if when I walked out they said " look, we got an off vibe about you, you answered questions fine but hey, we just cannot give the job to you"

 

Or alternatively, if they said " you were pretty good, I mistreat, but we aren't sure ifbyiubwipp be better than the others.. You didn't nail it Leigh 87 but you may stand a chance if the rest are mediocre, since you were a tad above average.

 

 

 

Honestly is what I would love from people in real life.

 

 

I am not as great as recruiters have said or I wouldn't be long term unemployed.

 

If I was great I wouldn't attend interview after interview and never get the jobs!

[Leigh 87]

Do you think it could be a good thing that I sincerely don't believe any of my interviews will actually amount to anything further than the interview??

 

I still enjoy the interview very much though, I have just stopped feeling that acute pressure of desperately praying that I get the job.

 

I sort of go to an interview and think " well this is fun, I enjoy talking, I enjoy taking about my achievement and answering their questions "

 

Then I walk out and literally never expect to here from them again haha.

 

It is definately not bitter or angry. I just see interviews as a fun activity.

 

I no longer see interviews as a road to a job because I simply do not get jobs. I still enjoy them though and feel very happy I secured the interview to begin with but that is as far as it goes lol.

 

I have stopped hoping for a job as I just don't believe I stand out and can compete with 200 or more applicants that are all applying for every retail job.

[Leigh 87]

I dont mean to be negative to any other long term unemployed.

 

However, I believe I am unemployable. I have turned up to a few interviews these past two months. Employable individuals don't attend interview after interview without getting a job.

 

 

I think some people are just unemployable. Not just the obvious cases of people who are under educated.. But there must be other people like me who dress well and are well spoken yet are simply unemployable????

 

 

 

I think getting my degree will help me. I'll have some worth.

 

 

 

I am truly depressed. All my friends and family get to work. What do they have that I don't????

 

 

My friends don't see me often as they work during the week and want to spend free time with their bf...and their friends who can afford to meet them out for drinks.

 

 

 

Make I need to ask for medication.. I dunno it's just so depressing to see. Everyone around you get jobs when you cannot.

 

I worked my ass off in school and did much better than all my friends yet hey, they all have jibs and get to earn a wage!!! And I am.forced to staying home and look for work.

 

 

 

 

I'm not sure how to learn to accept unemployment as very likely long term condition. I can't stomach it.

 

 

I wish this depression would just dissipate.

[Leigh 87]

I have a family gathering tomorrow.. I feel so isolated when I am amaysngrace around groups of people who all get to work for a living. I feel like an elephant in the room.

 

My family all saw me do well in school and they think I'm clever and they think I have good potential.

 

It's just so hard for me to face my younger cousins who work in prestigious financial firms who get to go off to south America whenever they please for holidays.

 

I literally have nothing to report about myself. Lie what...i love my cat and spend ally time with her at home inside all day because I cannot afford to leave my flat because I'm unemployed????

 

I am good at talking about other people and asking about them so I never have nothing to say but I do deflect any questions away from me. I just say " Yeah, I'm so excited about college next semester, podiatry was a bit of an unexpected choice wasnt it! "

 

My family are very supportive of my decision to study podiatry as they have wanted me to get on the right path for years.

 

 

 

But yeah it is very shameful that I cannot talk about my job or..any travel or new events I've gone to!

 

I never... Ever tell new people I meet that I'm unemployed!!!!!!!!!!

 

When I meet the public I definately lie and just tell them I work lol.

 

One business man tooke aside when he overhead me with my bf. He asked me why I was unemployed.. I was wearing quality designer jeans u saves a year for ( they were a hundred dollars), a blazer, and a quality top. He said that he didn't understand why I wasn't enjoyed.

 

He said frankly, he thought there was something wrong with people in most cases. I nearly cried. I then tried to educate him that many new grads are unemployed and homeless because they cannot get any job offer. I told him that thousands of normal Australians are simple not able to get a job for a year or even years at a time.

 

He was alarmed and thanked me for telling him. That made my day...... I finally got through to those typical right wingers who assume there is a job for evryone and we simple don't want to do retail or low paid jobs.

 

When I was overseas last year a snobby guy was like " social work...that's noble of you, you do realise that they can help themselves if they wanted " hahahaa.

 

 

 

 

If there is any consultation to me most likely remaining unemployed, it is me being able to educate people about the masses of people who are decent and not rough around the edges, who are not undesirable and yet who remain unemployed for years at a time.

 

 

I am looking forward to the interviews tomorrow. It feels like I am entering the lotto each time!