girlfriend dumped me after 4 years, (Updated)

[msms21]

IM DEVASTATED.

I really cant take this pain any longer i want to die.

I saw a pictuers of them both, They almost always together, each day another photo, and she f**** looks so happy, so freaking happy, you all lied to me, you said it was a rebound. So why it doesnt looks like a f***ing rebound? We broke up 3 and a half months ago, shes started talking to him immediately and started dating him a month and a half later, i was sure its an classic rebound but when i saw her instgram, his full of hapiness and things they do toghter..

They even was in a vacation toghter 3 weeks ago!!!!! When they was f****** one month with each other ! I was with her 4 years, and we had only one !!!! I raised her ! She cant do this to me i cant take it my heart cant stnd the pain any longer ..

I gave her everything .. She cant just throw me away and treat me like a dog, she knows those photos hurts me, she want to hurt me, and i really dont know why, i just want her to hug me again and tell me its just a nightmare

 

She can really move on from 4 years in 3 months? She really can fall in love with him so shortly ?!

I knows shes still checking my facebook wall and stuff... and shes still calling me from block numbers sometimes... But it looks like she moved on anyway i donnow im getting out of my mind, i really become crazy.

Edited October 26, 2014 by msms21

[BC1980]

IM DEVASTATED.

I really cant take this pain any longer i want to die.

I saw a pictuers of them both, They almost always together, each day another photo, and she f**** looks so happy, so freaking happy, you all lied to me, you said it was a rebound. So why it doesnt looks like a f***ing rebound? We broke up 3 and a half months ago, shes started talking to him immediately and started dating him a month and a half later, i was sure its an classic rebound but when i saw her instgram, his full of hapiness and things they do toghter..

They even was in a vacation toghter 3 weeks ago!!!!! When they was f****** one month with each other ! I was with her 4 years, and we had only one !!!! I raised her ! She cant do this to me i cant take it my heart cant stnd the pain any longer ..

I gave her everything .. She cant just throw me away and treat me like a dog, she knows those photos hurts me, she want to hurt me, and i really dont know why, i just want her to hug me again and tell me its just a nightmare

 

She can really move on from 4 years in 3 months? She really can fall in love with him so shortly ?!

I knows shes still checking my facebook wall and stuff... and shes still calling me from block numbers sometimes... But it looks like she moved on anyway i donnow im getting out of my mind, i really become crazy.

 

I think she was probably cheating on you, which is why it appears she has moved on so quickly. Even if nothing physical happened while you were still together, at the very least it was emotional. I would be shocked if she weren't cheating, but you will not get the truth from her. I read in your first post that you accidentally let her know you had feelings for another girl, so that likely made it easier for your ex to leave. Women are much more hurt by emotional cheating than physical cheating.

 

I know this is awful right now, but you really need to block her FB or any other way you have access to her on social media. It's only causing you more pain. It's one thing to know she is with someone else, but it's something entirely worse to see it with your own eyes.

Edited October 26, 2014 by BC1980

[msms21]

I think she was probably cheating on you, which is why it appears she has moved on so quickly. Even if nothing physical happened while you were still together, at the very least it was emotional. I would be shocked if she weren't cheating, but you will not get the truth from her. I read in your first post that you accidentally let her know you had feelings for another girl, so that likely made it easier for your ex to leave. Women are much more hurt by emotional cheating than physical cheating.

 

I know this is awful right now, but you really need to block her FB or any other way you have access to her on social media. It's only causing you more pain. It's one thing to know she is with someone else, but it's something entirely worse to see it with your own eyes.

 

Ok so i took a fee days thinking on your advice.

Ive blocked her on facebook and instgram 2 days ago, blocked her sister and mother and deleted our photos from there.

Yesterday some idiot dude that i dont know sent me a message on facebook and asked m to call him, i didnt know what it is about so i called him.

He asked me about my ex, told me that she is speaking to him while she have a boyfriend, telling things like love y, i wanna kiss you and stuff, and asked me if i know her this way, i told him that i dont know her at all since we broke up shes different. He told me that shes dont stop talking about me all day long, that she would die for me, that she cryed about me 2 days ago.. Than he said he have to go and hanged up O.O

Im really confuse. I keep nc normally but what does this all means? I guess shes still very in love with me if she still cries and thinking about me so much, is there's a chance the ice will break and she will want me back again?

 

I really try to let go since i read your comment im on FULL nc. Hope it will help me to move on, or even will make her come back..

[BC1980]

Ok so i took a fee days thinking on your advice.

Ive blocked her on facebook and instgram 2 days ago, blocked her sister and mother and deleted our photos from there.

Yesterday some idiot dude that i dont know sent me a message on facebook and asked m to call him, i didnt know what it is about so i called him.

He asked me about my ex, told me that she is speaking to him while she have a boyfriend, telling things like love y, i wanna kiss you and stuff, and asked me if i know her this way, i told him that i dont know her at all since we broke up shes different. He told me that shes dont stop talking about me all day long, that she would die for me, that she cryed about me 2 days ago.. Than he said he have to go and hanged up O.O

Im really confuse. I keep nc normally but what does this all means? I guess shes still very in love with me if she still cries and thinking about me so much, is there's a chance the ice will break and she will want me back again?

 

I really try to let go since i read your comment im on FULL nc. Hope it will help me to move on, or even will make her come back..

 

You have no way to know if what he said is even true. If she wants to reconcile, she can reach out to you. She's capable of doing that. You still need to keep NC. Even if what he said is true, the conclusions you have drawn (she is very much in love and there is a chance at reconciliation), are completely hypothetical.

[msms21]

My ex dumped me 4 and a half monthes ago after 4 years toghter, she started dating some idiot 18 boy a months later(im 21 shes 19 soon)

 

My heart cant take this pain, i try and try but shes just dont go away, im in Total nc for something like a month, no facebook no instgram nothing but everything i do make me miss her more, miss her laugh, smile, voice, im just in love with her and it dont go away.

 

I tryed dating but they are not like her, they cant make me laugh like her, they dont have her face and not smart like her i just want to talk with her i just want to feel her again i cant stand the idea of living an entire life without her, its too hurt to imagine her with this idiot too...

How the hell she manage to get by with this ? How can he replace me i dont understand !! I just thinking, i cant i just cant let all of those memories go, and i dont even sure 100% i want her back honestley im too hurt.

 

But the pain is just awful, i cant sleep im getting sleep in 4 or 3 am every night, if i do get sleep i have nightmares about her, i see her face all the time in my mind, when i work rest go out, keep thinking how was it like if she was here, what would she say to me..

And im really afraid of the future, deep inside im waiting for her to contact me and say she is sorry and give me some explanation to her behaviour, that she was wrong, anything!

 

But truely i dont even know how i will respond, i tryed to imagine it so many times and still i donnow what is going to be my answer, will ill just go? Shut up? Forgive her ? I really dont know

And will she ever contact me ? I mean 4 months ago she couldent live without hearing my voice and now she just deleted me ? Like that ? Will she ever contact me ? I truely tierd of thinking.

Any advices that can help me help myself feel better.. ?

Edited November 23, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[fetish1980]

Your entire post means that you need to work less on putting your energy into her and put it into yourself.

 

Take up a new hobby, Join a gym, Learn a new language, Learn a new instrument, write a new song, take dancing or art classes, Read some self- help books such as self esteem boosters, buy yourself some new clothes, get a new hair- do. Do all the things that you have been denying yourself while you were with her.

 

It's going to hurt for a while, acknowledge your hurt but don't allow it to overtake you. It never feels good to be dumped, especially for someone else. But you can't afford to let anyone define your self worth. We only get one shot at life and you don't want to get to a point where you have regret for wasting a moment on some of what are supposed to be some of the best years of your life.

 

It took me a while to learn this. I used to be an avid poster primarily around early 2011 where I experienced a tough break up from a woman I was with for 8 years and had plans to marry. The best words that helped me the most from this forum and any counseling session I would've wasted my money on are: "Invest in yourself"

 

Good luck to you bro. You're going to be alright.

[Cedar27]

I agree with above poster. Now is the time to focus on yourself. There is an old saying if you love someone let them go and if they come back it was meant to be, or something to that effect. I understand right now is hard for you, and your pain is truly interfering in your life. Have you ever thought about going to a therapist and talking? It can help. Right now do things that make YOU happy. Do you have a special place you like to go to (hiking perhaps), a favorite show or movie you like to watch? Don't ignore the pain, feel it and all of it's intensity but also accept what has happened and do your absolute best to treat yourself well. Good luck, it will get better in time.

[msms21]

Hey everyone, ive been on nc for something like 5 months from her and she called me today..

I was shocked when i saw her number but ive answered.

At the start she called and hanged up than she called again.

She told me she saw ive done my army service and she felt ahe needs to congrat me. But than we kept talking, she started to say how she is sorry about her behavior when we broke up, and she thought ahe was making the right thing but after few months she realized it was stupid to give up on everything we had but she thought its too late to take it back, she said she missed me and never loved and will love anyone like me.

When i asked her how she is doing with her bf, she said "what does it matters now?" we kept loading memories and talked for two hours and in the end of the call she said she will call again tommorow but i dont have to answer only if i want.

 

WHAT DOES SHE WANTS?!

She is messing with my brain

How should i act?

[Simon Phoenix]

Hey everyone, ive been on nc for something like 5 months from her and she called me today..

I was shocked when i saw her number but ive answered.

At the start she called and hanged up than she called again.

She told me she saw ive done my army service and she felt ahe needs to congrat me. But than we kept talking, she started to say how she is sorry about her behavior when we broke up, and she thought ahe was making the right thing but after few months she realized it was stupid to give up on everything we had but she thought its too late to take it back, she said she missed me and never loved and will love anyone like me.

When i asked her how she is doing with her bf, she said "what does it matters now?" we kept loading memories and talked for two hours and in the end of the call she said she will call again tommorow but i dont have to answer only if i want.

 

WHAT DOES SHE WANTS?!

She is messing with my brain

How should i act?

 

Don't act. Let it go to voicemail.

[msms21]

Don't act. Let it go to voicemail.

 

I couldent stand it and answered...

As the call kept going she said ahe broke up with her bf and she want me back.

 

Im very confused. I meen she broke my heart and treated me like i was nothing and suddenly its the old same person?

More than that i want and dont want her back. I miss her like hell shes my best friend but in this time i was broken.

I havent even allmost dated girls, barely 3 or 4 and if i go back i have to stick to her.

 

I love hef, true love, but im confuse.