Consolidated discussion - In dating/relationships, my gender has a much harder time

[bking]

<2017 discussion starts here>

 

it seem the internet has a ton of quasi single women here.

seriously what is up, with alot of you ladies on love and dating forum,

all you do is complain how dating is so hard, but yet many of you gals

have a FWB, or can still go out and get laid. or still get dates ( maybe short and doesn't lead any where) but come on, you ladies don't have it that bad.

Look, Im 30 and only been with one woman ( by luck)

 

haven't done anything with a woman for 6 years now, and Im not the worst of the worst, there are people ( both male and female) who never had sex, never had a date, never had a FWB, never went on pointless short date.

 

it annoys me, when I hear women complaining ''oh, Im so lonely''

''can't find a perfect man'' ''but last month, I sex with 4 guys'' ''and also my fwb came over for 2 weeks''

 

maybe some of you ladies have your set of problems, maybe you like a good long term relationship, but come on, you ladies have it way better than many men ( and few unlucky women) do.

 

in my book, if you have a fwb, can go out and get laid, or still get short dates

your a ''quasi'' single.

Edited August 5, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Maleficent]

Just because a woman (or a man for that matter) has sex or is going on dates doesn't mean he/she isn't lonely.

 

The difference between you and them is they'd probably rather concentrate on what they have rather than complain about what they don't/didn't have...

[PhoenixRysing]

Really? Didn't we just do this?

[Suave]

Some of the loneliest people in the world are in long-term relationships. Lonelier still are the ones used for sex and nothing more.

[jma500]

Really? Didn't we just do this?

 

Threads like this will continue ad infinitum as there will always be angry, bitter people to create them.

[bking]

Just because a woman (or a man for that matter) has sex or is going on dates doesn't mean he/she isn't lonely.

 

The difference between you and them is they'd probably rather concentrate on what they have rather than complain about what they don't/didn't have...

 

if your going on dates, or having sex, your not really lonely.

because both of them thing your doing something with someone.

it just some people, think they have it harder than they really do,

[Maleficent]

if your going on dates, or having sex, your not really lonely.

because both of them thing your doing something with someone.

it just some people, think they have it harder than they really do,

 

 

loneliness has nothing to do with being surrounded with people or not. You can be in a crowd of people that only have eyes for you and still be lonely.

[bking]

Threads like this will continue ad infinitum as there will always be angry, bitter people to create them.

 

you know what interesting, the women who usually get mad at these type of thread are usually the women that are either

A- in a relationship

or

B- having tons of sex, or have a fwb, or an ex she sleeps with.

 

--------

to this day, and no matter what site it is, whenever a guys goes on and say

something like this: ''women have it so easy in dating'' ''us men, have it so hard'' ''you ladies, can get laid whenever you want''

 

99% of the women who respond, are usually upset about it, and tell the guy ''oh, it's not true'' ''us, women do struggle'' ''you, men have entitlement issues'' ''your biterness is why women don't date you''

but 99% of the women who respond either all have boyfriends, or still are having tons of sex, or have a fwb.

 

I find it so funny, whenever a guy say ''ladies can get laid easy''

and the ladies who respond, are the ladies who have no trouble getting laid,

or have had tons of sex partners.

[Maleficent]

you know what interesting, the women who usually get mad at these type of thread are usually the women that are either

A- in a relationship

or

B- having tons of sex, or have a fwb, or an ex she sleeps with.

 

--------

to this day, and no matter what site it is, whenever a guys goes on and say

something like this: ''women have it so easy in dating'' ''us men, have it so hard'' ''you ladies, can get laid whenever you want''

 

99% of the women who respond, are usually upset about it, and tell the guy ''oh, it's not true'' ''us, women do struggle'' ''you, men have entitlement issues'' ''your biterness is why women don't date you''

but 99% of the women who respond either all have boyfriends, or still are having tons of sex, or have a fwb.

 

I find it so funny, whenever a guy say ''ladies can get laid easy''

and the ladies who respond, are the ladies who have no trouble getting laid,

or have had tons of sex partners.

 

Of course, a man's perspective on women's sexual life is much better than a woman's...

 

It's just as easy for a man to get laid. They're just not doing it right.

Once I met this guy online who said he wasn't looking for a relationship. So one night I texted him 'come over so I can **** you' and he did.

Do this to a woman it probably won't work.

Of course.

 

It doesn't mean a man can't get a woman in bed. He just has to use different techniques.

[bking]

loneliness has nothing to do with being surrounded with people or not. You can be in a crowd of people that only have eyes for you and still be lonely.

 

let see, we have two women.

women A: has no boyfriends, she has no friends, she suffer from social anxiety, she can't even go anywhere. when people try to make friends with her, she just freeze up and talking to guys is impossible. Not only is she shy, but she is weird ( weird enough that she scares guys off) she wants a date,

she wants friends but she can;t

 

woman b: does not have a boyfriend, has a few friend, but she every now, goes on date, yes, she does attract jerks, and loser men. sometimes

she gets horny and decide to go out and have sex, and she does.

she also has a fwb, and one of your short live date partner, she can call up and sleep with.

 

now, who lonely woman A or woman B.

 

now woman A can't connect with people at all

where woman B can, and woman B has few friends, a fwb, and tons of guys willing to have sex with her. so which woman has it bad?

[PhoenixRysing]

you know what interesting, the women who usually get mad at these type of thread are usually the women that are either

A- in a relationship

or

B- having tons of sex, or have a fwb, or an ex she sleeps with.

 

--------

to this day, and no matter what site it is, whenever a guys goes on and say

something like this: ''women have it so easy in dating'' ''us men, have it so hard'' ''you ladies, can get laid whenever you want''

 

99% of the women who respond, are usually upset about it, and tell the guy ''oh, it's not true'' ''us, women do struggle'' ''you, men have entitlement issues'' ''your biterness is why women don't date you''

but 99% of the women who respond either all have boyfriends, or still are having tons of sex, or have a fwb.

 

I find it so funny, whenever a guy say ''ladies can get laid easy''

and the ladies who respond, are the ladies who have no trouble getting laid,

or have had tons of sex partners.

 

Now you're just being deliberately obtuse. I don't think anyone is debating that women can get laid easier...it is more than likely true as men tend to be more willing to have no strings attached sex with various women. Equally true men can get relationships and love easier since women are more likely to pursue and want something long term much earlier. And still true - women as a whole don't equate getting laid to getting loved.

 

Meanwhile - I think you should do one of two things:

1. Re-post this answer in your other thread just like this one as it is equally applicable there.

2. If you really want to understand what both men and women are facing in the dating world (that is so easy for them) have a gander at my thread in the In Search Of forum, or read all the questions from women asking "What do you think is going on, are we exclusive, is he still interested, will he ever call me back?"

 

Heck - extend yourself and do both!

[PhoenixRysing]

let see, we have two women.

women A: has no boyfriends, she has no friends, she suffer from social anxiety, she can't even go anywhere. when people try to make friends with her, she just freeze up and talking to guys is impossible. Not only is she shy, but she is weird ( weird enough that she scares guys off) she wants a date,

she wants friends but she can;t

 

woman b: does not have a boyfriend, has a few friend, but she every now, goes on date, yes, she does attract jerks, and loser men. sometimes

she gets horny and decide to go out and have sex, and she does.

she also has a fwb, and one of your short live date partner, she can call up and sleep with.

 

now, who lonely woman A or woman B.

 

now woman A can't connect with people at all

where woman B can, and woman B has few friends, a fwb, and tons of guys willing to have sex with her. so which woman has it bad?

 

Is this a trick questions? Sounds like it sucks pretty bad for both.

[bking]

loneliness has nothing to do with being surrounded with people or not. You can be in a crowd of people that only have eyes for you and still be lonely.

 

let see, we have two women.

women A: has no boyfriends, she has no friends, she suffer from social anxiety, she can't even go anywhere. when people try to make friends with her, she just freeze up and talking to guys is impossible. Not only is she shy, but she is weird ( weird enough that she scares guys off) she wants a date,

she wants friends but she can;t

 

woman b: does not have a boyfriend, has a few friend, but she every now, goes on date, yes, she does attract jerks, and loser men. sometimes

she gets horny and decide to go out and have sex, and she does.

she also has a fwb, and one of her of your short live date partner, she can call up and sleep with.

 

now, who lonely woman A or woman B.

 

now woman A can't connect with people at all

where woman B can, and woman B has few friends, a fwb, and tons of guys willing to have sex with her. so which woman has it bad?

[ThaWholigan]

Let's stop taking this sh*t seriously now - it's their lives, let them be pissed

[ThaWholigan]

that not the issues, my problem with some women on these sites, are the fact, they try making it look like, they have such hardship, like we are suppose to feel so sorry for them, oh boo, hoo, You didn't find the perfect man, oh no man will commit to you, oh wow. But at least you get a consulation prize, yeah, you still get sex.

I don't really care how much sex a woman has, or a man for that matter.

But please, don't pretend that everything is so tough.

women on these site, they whine and complain, whine, whine, whine.

Like being spolied,''I got second place'' but ''didn't get first, feel sorry for me'' at least when men complain that actual have real reason, they get nothing, no sex, no love, no kiss, no date, nothing.

AKA "I'm the biggest victim"

[Maleficent]

let see, we have two women.

women A: has no boyfriends, she has no friends, she suffer from social anxiety, she can't even go anywhere. when people try to make friends with her, she just freeze up and talking to guys is impossible. Not only is she shy, but she is weird ( weird enough that she scares guys off) she wants a date,

she wants friends but she can;t

 

woman b: does not have a boyfriend, has a few friend, but she every now, goes on date, yes, she does attract jerks, and loser men. sometimes

she gets horny and decide to go out and have sex, and she does.

she also has a fwb, and one of your short live date partner, she can call up and sleep with.

 

now, who lonely woman A or woman B.

 

now woman A can't connect with people at all

where woman B can, and woman B has few friends, a fwb, and tons of guys willing to have sex with her. so which woman has it bad?

 

You can't use two cases to prove a point like this.

 

You can have two women in both categories (A or B) and have one comfortable and happy in her situation and the other one isn't.

 

If you're going to state something like this, you would need to have a full on study with over a few hundred people to be able to make your hypothesis not a generalization...

[PhoenixRysing]

that not the issues, my problem with some women on these sites, are the fact, they try making it look like, they have such hardship, like we are suppose to feel so sorry for them, oh boo, hoo, You didn't find the perfect man, oh no man will commit to you, oh wow. But at least you get a consulation prize, yeah, you still get sex.

I don't really care how much sex a woman has, or a man for that matter.

But please, don't pretend that everything is so tough.

women on these site, they whine and complain, whine, whine, whine.

Like being spolied,''I got second place'' but ''didn't get first, feel sorry for me'' at least when men complain that actual have real reason, they get nothing, no sex, no love, no kiss, no date, nothing.

 

You're right. That sucks.

 

One idea...instead of attacking those/us women you could try being understanding of their unique plights and then you might get to be one of those men that those women are having sex with...you do know we don't do it alone right? Just a thought.

[Maleficent]

ok, ladies who have it hard, go ahead, try imaging being in your 40's or older,

never had a boyfriend, never had sex, have no fwb, and no man even wants to date you. That what f---king hardship is. Not going out there and sleeping with tons of guys, having a fwb, going on dates.

 

I know women who don't date, they are too ''crazy'' for men to date.

these women are the one's with problem.

not you ladies, who think you have so called dating problems.

 

If I was 40 never had a boyfriend, a date etc etc I would be incredibly frustrated at other women who aren't necessarily the prettiest around but can get dates and I'd complain everyone is getting dates but me.

Alas, I am only 32 years old and got laid less than two weeks ago and have a potential date in line for this week end.

 

Oh well.

[Anela]

women on these site, they whine and complain, whine, whine, whine.

Like being spolied,''I got second place'' but ''didn't get first, feel sorry for me'' at least when men complain that actual have real reason, they get nothing, no sex, no love, no kiss, no date, nothing.

 

Oh poor you. There are those of us who don't want "someone willing to have sex with us." How lovely: someone graces me with their presence long enough to grunt on me, and use me for a little while, and I'm supposed to want that? *I've never put myself in that position, because I don't want that.

 

I've never been loved, either: I've mostly had gross men trying to cheat with me, behind their girlfriend's backs, and then insult me when I won't do it - and then I'm blamed for their girlfriend breaking up with them, or punished by the girlfriend for their boyfriend's actions. And insulted, repeatedly. Honestly, most of you just aren't worth it anymore. I'm sick of it, and I have no sympathy for those of you who continue to insult women - ALL women - unless they spread their legs for you, or "lower their sandards" (in your opinion, if you don;'t think you're that handsome, aren't the bad boy we supposedly want, don't have much money - which makes us shallow, but you wouldn't deign to even have sex with a woman that you consider to be a "pig", even though you're so desperate - and I consider those women lucky in the long run, because they don't deserve that sort of treatment).

 

How dare we want someone who we feel comfortable around,e asy to talk to, easy to spend time with, who we find attractive, who actually LIKES US, gets along with our family, doesn't blame us for everything that's wrong in their lives, has interests outside of getting laid, and bringing up their numbers so that they can brag to their mates. Have goals and want to build a life, rather than "hanging out" and expecting a woman to take care of everything - and stay under 110lbs, look good in a bikini - even after having their babies - and how dare they even have had a sex life before they met you ? they're supposed to be beautiful, and sexy, and innocent and pure, and loaded with cash, AND supposed to chase you down and give you sex, propose to you, because women wanted equality, so now they have it. And then you get to be scared, because she's trying to pin you down and men need their freedom.

 

Am I missing anything?

[Anela]

ok, ladies who have it hard, go ahead, try imaging being in your 40's or older,

never had a boyfriend, never had sex, have no fwb, and no man even wants to date you. That what f---king hardship is. Not going out there and sleeping with tons of guys, having a fwb, going on dates.

 

I know women who don't date, they are too ''crazy'' for men to date.

these women are the one's with problem.

not you ladies, who think you have so called dating problems.

 

I'm 38 and am pretty damned close to that - and men like the ones I described have a hefty amount of blame in making me crazy. Along with the girlfriends who think I must be punished, because their boyfriend hit on me (includes my sister).

 

The difference between you and I, is that I know where I've made mistakes before, and I've now taken myself out of the running for any relationships, because I *feel* like I shouldn't lump someone with my now - I'm not as emotionally healthy as I once was. A great relationship doesn't come out of pity - I would have loved to meet someone who was a good match for me, but it isn't going to happen now.

[jma500]

you know what interesting, the women who usually get mad at these type of thread are usually the women that are either

A- in a relationship

or

B- having tons of sex, or have a fwb, or an ex she sleeps with.

 

--------

to this day, and no matter what site it is, whenever a guys goes on and say

something like this: ''women have it so easy in dating'' ''us men, have it so hard'' ''you ladies, can get laid whenever you want''

 

99% of the women who respond, are usually upset about it, and tell the guy ''oh, it's not true'' ''us, women do struggle'' ''you, men have entitlement issues'' ''your biterness is why women don't date you''

but 99% of the women who respond either all have boyfriends, or still are having tons of sex, or have a fwb.

 

I find it so funny, whenever a guy say ''ladies can get laid easy''

and the ladies who respond, are the ladies who have no trouble getting laid,

or have had tons of sex partners.

 

I am a guy and i find these threads and this example foolish. You want to be angry and bitter that is your choice. Until you form a different midset you will go nowhere with women.

[bking]

I'm 38 and am pretty damned close to that - and men like the ones I described have a hefty amount of blame in making me crazy. Along with the girlfriends who think I must be punished, because their boyfriend hit on me (includes my sister).

 

The difference between you and I, is that I know where I've made mistakes before, and I've now taken myself out of the running for any relationships, because I *feel* like I shouldn't lump someone with my now - I'm not as emotionally healthy as I once was. A great relationship doesn't come out of pity - I would have loved to meet someone who was a good match for me, but it isn't going to happen now.

 

this is not about me at all. even If had sex with 1000's women, I would still have same thoughts on this issue.

 

told you and others here, what my issues is. It annoying hearing women trying to make look like they have it so hard, and the most insulting, when they try to make it look like they have it just as equally hard as men here, who never dating once, let alone even kiss a girl.

 

yeah, so we have women here, who can't find the perfect man, but yet still can get sex. vs men here, who can't get nothing. really, really.

 

You ladies, for the love of god, actual believe you are equal to all these men who can't get nothing. just first once, just be honest. just admit, you do better than men, just admit, that your so called hardship, are no where near the hardship of many men who struggle.

 

go ahead,live in your self pity illusion. I feel so sorry for you ladies, so upset about it, boo hoo.

[Truthsayer]

I am a guy and i find these threads and this example foolish. You want to be angry and bitter that is your choice. Until you form a different midset you will go nowhere with women.

 

Not true. Have seen plenty of bitter men go lots of places with women. Even if I showed you video footage you probably would still deny. Even the fact in society the man is supposed to approach which already puts you in a losing position.

Edited May 27, 2013 by Truthsayer

[jma500]

Not true. Have seen plenty of bitter men go lots of places with women. Even if I showed you video footage you probably would still deny. Even the fact in society the man is supposed to approach which already puts you in a losing position.

 

I believe you but the women you speak of have issues that lead them down this path to begin with. Not the type of women i want to be with.

[Blue Toast]

Some of the loneliest people in the world are in long-term relationships. Lonelier still are the ones used for sex and nothing more.

Lonlier still are men who are about to hit 45 and have never had any relationships, sex or even been kissed. That's my reality.