Author Col1 Posted May 25, 2013 Author Share Posted May 25, 2013 Women aren't intimidated or jealous of another woman's unprofessional attire/behavior. Why would we be? Some women at my office are jealous. Passive-aggressiveness (gossip; mocking) but never directly to her. That shows insecurity and leads me to believe they are intimidated by the new girl's attire. Link to post Share on other sites
Kamille Posted May 25, 2013 Share Posted May 25, 2013 Boy Col. You're so judgmental of your female coworkers! You jealous and insecure? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Star Gazer Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 Some women at my office are jealous. Passive-aggressiveness (gossip; mocking) but never directly to her. That shows insecurity and leads me to believe they are intimidated by the new girl's attire. Some women behave this way regardless of any jealousy or insecurity. Link to post Share on other sites
Leigh 87 Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 People that are truly happy within themselves would not care if there was a super model look alike in the office who dressed sexily and got all the guys attention. I am not 100% there regarding my self worth, but even I just smile and enjoy the company of women who are more " desirable" than me, as I can see I still have a lot to offer the right guy who will adore me more than a better looking women. This is a stupid question: what sort of women spend that much time trying to dress slutty in order to garner mail attention? Obviously they do not feel as though they are attractive enough or worthy enough to get guys to like them for who they truly are. Link to post Share on other sites
Leigh 87 Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 I am looking forward to getting my degree and having to witness these imbeciles.... Hopefully my job in "social justice" will enable more lovely, kind people with no room to speak negatively about others, to be around me. Do that many people really have that much energy they want to invest in gossiping about others? Do mature adults really feel that they have so little to offer that hotter women that get more male attention and dress sluty, threaten THEIR potential to make men fall for them? Link to post Share on other sites
Leigh 87 Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 And finally: my god, if a women has a real problem with another women at work dressing "provocatively", then why doesn't she approach the women in private, and mention that the provocatively dressed women makes her feel uncomfortable? I think that these sort of issues do not truly bother women; they bitchh and gossip cos they are so boring and unremarkable as people, that they have time to talk about other people. If you have THAT much of an issue with a person, I prefer the good old fashion way: talking to them and telling them how you feel. Why on earth do people go and bitchh about others, instead of confronting the person and trying to RESOLVE the issue? Would their lives honestly be THAT boring without the workplace gossip? I find men and relationships are enough of a talking point without having to speak badly of others to get kicks and thrills from. I have met people like myself, who in spite of our own dislikes about ourselves, still do not say anything about another person unless we have something nice to say. Link to post Share on other sites
tbf Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 Col, tell me you wouldn't mock a guy who dressed like these two in the office. I would, whether office or not. http://www.cefashion.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/394823Muscular-Man-Wearing-Tight-Denim-Shorts-and-Vest-Posters-224x300.jpg http://www.exceptionalmag.com/photos/JB%20Green%20Open%20Shirt%20Rev.jpg 4 Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 Col, tell me you wouldn't mock a guy who dressed like these two in the office. I would, whether office or not. http://www.cefashion.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/394823Muscular-Man-Wearing-Tight-Denim-Shorts-and-Vest-Posters-224x300.jpg http://www.exceptionalmag.com/photos/JB%20Green%20Open%20Shirt%20Rev.jpg Why the hell is John Basedow wearing pleated pants... Link to post Share on other sites
Star Gazer Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 Why the hell is John Basedow wearing pleated pants... PLEATED PANTS!!! The ultimate no-no!!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TouchedByViolet Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 What makes you think the women in your office would be intimidated by a young girl who is too stupid to realize what constitutes professional work attire? If anything, most either feel sorry for her or are mocking her. But intimidated? Doubtful for most professional women with any skills and confidence. I would like to call a giant Bu!! S**t on that. I went out with my friend's 3 female friends and they talk so much trash about the "slutty" dressing girls they work with. I can't read their mind to know why, but the result is to tare those women down. Women love gossiping and bringing down their fellow ladies. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 What makes you think the women in your office would be intimidated by a young girl who is too stupid to realize what constitutes professional work attire? If anything, most either feel sorry for her or are mocking her. But intimidated? Doubtful for most professional women with any skills and confidence. I would like to call a giant Bu!! S**t on that. I went out with my friend's 3 female friends and they talk so much trash about the "slutty" dressing girls they work with. I can't read their mind to know why, but the result is to tare those women down. Women love gossiping and bringing down their fellow ladies. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. You say you can't read their minds as to why these women gossip etc therefore you cannot know whether they are intimidated therefore you cannot call bulls**t. Seems to me these gossiping women are doing exactly what Clia said - they are mocking her. Link to post Share on other sites
LovelyLife Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 We aren't intimidated. In my world - male or female . . . We are all competing for the same leadership positions. From my sales creature days - I would have welcomed her. I knew she would not get high profile accounts that expected you to show up in conservative dress. So it would work in my favor to have someone there that didn't look like a high tier client would expect us to look. Now where I'm at in my career - its different. I don't where jeans to work in Friday. Casual dress yes . . . But no jeans. If leadership has a command meaning I want to look like I belong in building 4. And the reality is - neither our female CMO or female Staff VP of Sales would be caught dead in jeans on a Friday. Dress for what you want to be - not what you are. She's sending a message to management that she doesn't want to belong. It is kind of like the flip of The Devil Wears Prada - dress like a social worker in that environment and expect to be overlooked. Dress like a Club Hostess in a Corporate Environment and expected to be overlooked yet looked "over". In either situation, putting out a message that you don't want to belong ensures you never enter the six figure club while your competitors pass you by. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 In either situation, putting out a message that you don't want to belong ensures you never enter the six figure club while your competitors pass you by. Is it possible to put out a message that you do want to belong and are willing to do anything to "influence" decisions along the way to climb the corporate ladder...? Link to post Share on other sites
LovelyLife Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 Is it possible to put out a message that you do want to belong and are willing to do anything to "influence" decisions along the way to climb the corporate ladder...? You aren't in a Fortune 500. - correct? Military? Are you allowed to be in duty out of Uniform? My father was a Captain/Green Beret in the US Army. I was born in Weisbaden - total Officer's brat. That shaped my level of discipline. It's the same in Corporate America - we have lots of hipsters in my industry. A lot of Gen Y. Millenials. All of their lives they have been told they are unique and special. The reality is - just being born doesn't make one special. I'm sorry - but that's the truth. As a result - we have SOME that are well into their 20's that still haven't learned that sometimes to get along. . . You have to go along. That means conforming to your environment. If your environment is navy blue suits - that's what you wear. Honest - I can no more take the young woman in this situation into a meeting with the Staff VP of business controls than a young man who is trying to get a job on my team that has multiple tattoos on his arms and goes short sleeves - along with those earrings that guys do that stretch their ear holes to the size of nickels. This is an actual scenario for me. It's not me. The VP in question is a 53 year old white, male, Roman Catholic conservative whose 50 Something wife is in marketing and dresses in Brooks Brothers. I wear Brooks Brothers to work. Because that is what is expected. And in the mid 90s when I had a base pay of $35K a year and student loans out the the yang wazoo - I ordered suits from Chadwick's of Boston. Know why? I worked for white, male, conservative men that I had to impress not only on performance - but on appearance as well. Now imagine I join the Marines and tell my commanding officer that my JJill wearever collection was good enough for my former VP in corporate America on Fridays so it ought to be good enough for him/her. Imagine I said that to you? Would you not flip a **** and set me straight? Again - I come from the military culture. Sometimes there is just a right way to go about things. Discipline in appearance matters when your environment for success depends on it. Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 You aren't in a Fortune 500. - correct? Military? ... Again - I come from the military culture. Sometimes there is just a right way to go about things. Discipline in appearance matters when your environment for success depends on it. Oh, no, I absolutely agree with you. And I think hipsters belong on a deserted island. All of them. What I was getting at by my comment was when women wear more risque clothing choices to demonstrate their willingness to, ahem, "get ahead"... Link to post Share on other sites
LovelyLife Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 Those women standing around the water cooler gossiping? I'm not promoting them either. Know why? They are Goofing around on the Company's dime. What they do or wear after hours is none of my business. But being tracked for Executive Level management? That reflects on me. Get back to work! Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 What I was getting at by my comment was when women wear more risque clothing choices to demonstrate their willingness to, ahem, "get ahead"... That's called prostitution in my opinion. Sadly it does work with some men who think with their d*ck. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LovelyLife Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 Oh, no, I absolutely agree with you. And I think hipsters belong on a deserted island. All of them. What I was getting at by my comment was when women wear more risque clothing choices to demonstrate their willingness to, ahem, "get ahead"... They won't get very far.. In a few years she will be the woman hanging around the water cooler. While the risqué dressed woman was impressing someone two levels down - her brown nosing peer Suzette (actual person) who is stunning and classy in her black shift and jacket she bought online from Chadwick's (my tip to her - she got her MBA from Cornell so HUGE student loans) knocked on my door and asked if I had a few minutes to get a cup of coffee because she was going down anyways and wanted to discuss a high concept with me for controlling freight fraud. SOME young women entering the workforce dress as indicated in the OP. But it only gets you so far. Sooner rather than later 40 hits and being cute and sexy won't work anymore. Every good manager wants to bet on a winning horse. The show pony won't be able to run the race for the long run - the pure bred race horse beats her every time. Link to post Share on other sites
Nanuk Posted May 27, 2013 Share Posted May 27, 2013 (edited) I am looking forward to getting my degree and having to witness these imbeciles.... Hopefully my job in "social justice" will enable more lovely, kind people with no room to speak negatively about others, to be around me. Hopefully you will work with better social workers than some of the ones I've come across. Most of the ones I've met and worked with are nice, but some are catty and ruthless. I haven't met that many yet, my class hasn't even had our graduation ceremony yet, so I haven't been a social worker long, but I have been around social workers when I had a summer job with a child protection agency and when I did internships with other types of agencies. One of my friends from class could not complete her recent internship at a certain agency because some of the social workers made her time there unbearable. Some social workers can be as bad as anyone else, no different than people I've worked with in other industries I've worked in, I guess. Most social workers I've met are good people though, who don't act that way and don't condone the behaviour of social workers like the ones who drove my friend from her internship. As for the topic being discussed, no, I do not feel intimidated by how other women are dressed in the office. Edited May 27, 2013 by Nanuk Link to post Share on other sites
tman666 Posted May 27, 2013 Share Posted May 27, 2013 I'm not sure if "intimidated" is the right word, but yes, I'd say that I have personally witnessed the older, uglier women act negatively (backstab, spread gossip, etc.) towards the younger, more provocatively dressed women at work. The REAL jealous/catty behavior seems to stem from the wives/girlfriends of the male employees. Every time there's an x-mas party or company function where spouses are involved, you can bet that the younger female employees will have targets on their backs. Fun, fun. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted May 27, 2013 Share Posted May 27, 2013 I'm not sure if "intimidated" is the right word, but yes, I'd say that I have personally witnessed the older, uglier women act negatively (backstab, spread gossip, etc.) towards the younger, more provocatively dressed women at work. The REAL jealous/catty behavior seems to stem from the wives/girlfriends of the male employees. Every time there's an x-mas party or company function where spouses are involved, you can bet that the younger female employees will have targets on their backs. Fun, fun. I'd be curious to see what it'd be like working in a place where I was the only guy... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted May 27, 2013 Share Posted May 27, 2013 I'd be curious to see what it'd be like working in a place where I was the only guy... You would be eaten alive (and I don't mean in a way you would enjoy ) Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted May 27, 2013 Share Posted May 27, 2013 You would be eaten alive (and I don't mean in a way you would enjoy ) :laugh: How so though...? Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted May 27, 2013 Share Posted May 27, 2013 :laugh: How so though...? Let's just say that some of things you say on LS you can get away with because of not being IRL. But if you were in a room full of women..... ouch! Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted May 27, 2013 Share Posted May 27, 2013 Let's just say that some of things you say on LS you can get away with because of not being IRL. But if you were in a room full of women..... ouch! Ah, I see...I think that intrigues me enough to want to try... Link to post Share on other sites
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