thefooloftheyear Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 Your pain certainly didn't turn him off. I mean, I get horny as much as the next guy, but there are certain triggers that would turn me off. At the very least, your misery wasn't enough to deter him from getting off. It's a despicable act and he couldn't have cared less about your pain no matter how desperately you try to spin it. I agree.... Id sooner get aroused by a 90 year old woman naked than from a sobbing, desperate woman who I might have actually had some feelings for.. Its unheard of, frankly...Most women would have probably reached for a knife... TFY Link to post Share on other sites
Author J_L_C Posted May 26, 2013 Author Share Posted May 26, 2013 I agree.... Id sooner get aroused by a 90 year old woman naked than from a sobbing, desperate woman who I might have actually had some feelings for.. Its unheard of, frankly...Most women would have probably reached for a knife... TFY hehe, this made me smile! Thanks for the laugh :-) Link to post Share on other sites
Author J_L_C Posted May 27, 2013 Author Share Posted May 27, 2013 Been doing some thinking. I went out today with my EX-ex boyfriend. He is an amazing person and we are very good friends. We were together for just over 5 years. Our relationship started from a tight friendship and ended positively on mutual terms. I think that's why we can still be friends. Anyhow, I went for a coffee with him today. He knows alllllll about the story of my recent ex. He obviously knows me very well and was able to offer some calming advice to me about this situation. I'm really trying to take his advice to heart. "Why are you still pining for a guy that would do that? (jerking off)? Because that would be my cue that I don't want anything to do with him. No matter whether he comes back and apologizes for his behavior, no apology can take that away and that act should be your dealbreaker". I responded by saying "Everyone makes mistakes and I am sure that everyone has done SOMETHING that would be considered negative behavior. I feel like everyone deserves a second chance and I really believe I deserve it. I know so many other people whose exes gave them the benefit of the doubt, yet despite the love we shared, he won't. He just won't". I went on to say that I am upset because I was the one treated like $ hit and he gets to go on being happy, living it up since he's the life of the party and will likely be the one to find his true love, while I'm all damaged and $ hit. My EX-ex is a pretty insightful guy and our conversation continued with him reiterating the issue of WHY I would want to try with him again. As I said, I am doing a lot of thinking today. I'm trying my very best to get his words through my head. It's just very, VERY hard when you really love someone because the love becomes your logic (emotionally driven) and all "logic" (Intellect about the situation) goes out the window. Link to post Share on other sites
Author J_L_C Posted May 27, 2013 Author Share Posted May 27, 2013 I'm so very sad Link to post Share on other sites
siankat Posted May 27, 2013 Share Posted May 27, 2013 I'm seriously not being funny but, you and leigh87 should meet up and commiserate. You are milking it, stringing it out, starting multiple threads, bumping your own threads...there is something obsessive and attention seeking about it which probably has less and less to do with the breakup as time goes on. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted May 27, 2013 Share Posted May 27, 2013 I'm seriously not being funny but, you and leigh87 should meet up and commiserate. You are milking it, stringing it out, starting multiple threads, bumping your own threads...there is something obsessive and attention seeking about it which probably has less and less to do with the breakup as time goes on. Concur, concur, concur... When I logged in this morning and saw this thread was still alive, I thought to myself "Really? This thing is STILL being dragged out?" Link to post Share on other sites
emmalynro Posted May 27, 2013 Share Posted May 27, 2013 (edited) This is not about "hurting feelings". This is about a sociopath who is able to orgasm in view of his sobbing ex-girlfriend. That is deranged, terrifying, and deeply sick. I wouldn't have reached for a knife; I'd have reached for a shotgun. And a woman who did the same to a man would merit the same reaction. That said, speaking of sick, I would agree with the other posters that all this posting isn't healthy. Nobody denies that this guy has done massive emotional damage, and of course it'll take time to heal and move on. But fixating on this isn't good for you. As nice as these forums can be, I think they can encourage people to fixate and obsess over the past. I posted a thread for my breakup, but once I got over the initial agony I quit and only came back to post an update. I quit again and just came back to post another update. I try to focus more on other people here rather than myself, but of course it's natural to make comparisons. If these forums are causing you to linger more over your own problems, quit! This isn't helping you any more. Close your eyes and let him go. Edited May 28, 2013 by emmalynro Link to post Share on other sites
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