Do Mentally Strong Men have success with Mentally Damaged Women?

[jcrew11]

OK then you should look for the other kind of woman, while you're at it you might as well also look for a leprechaun and a purple unicorn too.

 

Haha, are you saying all women are damaged in some way?

 

That is the conclusion that I've drawn from experience. I never really felt mentally strong enough to "be a theraptist" to a girl, but with growing older, I now feel I have confidence and more to offer in mental support/emotional support to a younger woman.

 

I just never took on the Therapist/White Knight role before, but I know now that is what Alpha Men do - they step up and have the balls to take care of an insecure woman.

[fortyninethousand322]

It might be just me, but I seem to meet/date women who are "Mentally insecure or have been damaged by past relationships" and are looking for a White Knight to save them.

 

I think Men who are successful, confident, strong, and mentally secure will always have success meeting women, because many women are "Mentally insecure" and want a Man who can take care of them and solve her problems.

 

Women are definitely more "emotional" and by reading posts on this forum, many women have been Damaged by Men who have cheated or dumped them.

 

I know that relationships/couples are about "2 people growing together" but I'm tired of meeting women who are "mentally damaged" and carrying their weight and trying to solve their problems, while also having to deal with my own problems. I know its a lot to ask, but it seems like the single men and women out there who are "mentally strong and successful" are very few and difficult to find.

 

I've come to realize and expect that the women out there are "Mentally weak" and its up to guy to do the heavy lifting and become her White Knight Savior. Of course, most Men know this, but I bought into the whole Feminist philosophy and expected women to have their stuff together. I suppose that is why the PUA stuff works, because a Man who can take charge and captivate a 'mentally weak' women will always get laid.

 

Do the Men and Women here agree that its always up to the Guy to be "Mentally Strong" to handle "Emotionally Damaged" Women?

 

I think you're setting yourself up for a world of hurt. People who are mentally damaged are largely making a choice to be that way. They're not looking for somebody to save them, they're looking for their fix of drama.

[Estate]

It might be just me, but I seem to meet/date women who are "Mentally insecure or have been damaged by past relationships" and are looking for a White Knight to save them.

 

I think Men who are successful, confident, strong, and mentally secure will always have success meeting women, because many women are "Mentally insecure" and want a Man who can take care of them and solve her problems.

 

Women are definitely more "emotional" and by reading posts on this forum, many women have been Damaged by Men who have cheated or dumped them.

 

I know that relationships/couples are about "2 people growing together" but I'm tired of meeting women who are "mentally damaged" and carrying their weight and trying to solve their problems, while also having to deal with my own problems. I know its a lot to ask, but it seems like the single men and women out there who are "mentally strong and successful" are very few and difficult to find.

 

I've come to realize and expect that the women out there are "Mentally weak" and its up to guy to do the heavy lifting and become her White Knight Savior. Of course, most Men know this, but I bought into the whole Feminist philosophy and expected women to have their stuff together. I suppose that is why the PUA stuff works, because a Man who can take charge and captivate a 'mentally weak' women will always get laid.

 

Do the Men and Women here agree that its always up to the Guy to be "Mentally Strong" to handle "Emotionally Damaged" Women?

 

Why would anyone want to be a white knight?

 

You should be with woman to enhance her life, not fix it.

[tbf]

Why would anyone want to be a white knight?

 

You should be with woman to enhance her life, not fix it.

Three cheers to the right answer!!

 

Should include the caveat that not only should you be enhancing her life, she should also be enhancing your life, not fixing you.

[pbjbear]

Nah. I give every guy I date a chance even though I get called a "man hater" here. The guys Ive dated usually end up having more problems than me and a few have tried to mooch off of me...The most manipulative, mentally ****ed up guy I ever dated was a guy who was molested as a child by a guy. He didnt damage me though because I dont think there are many men out there as crazy as him...he was so crazy (and hid it well for the first month)

[todreaminblue]

to the poster who said hurt people hurt people.....in my opinion this is fallacy...people hurt people hurt or not....there is no more risk of getting hurt by someone who has been hurt than someone than someone who hasnt been hurt in fact it is more often than not heartless people who intentionally hurt others....who dont have compassion, who are dead inside not hurting....when people are not healed people they unintentionally hurt others...they need more acceptance and understanding than soemone who isnt damged or hurt.the ones too watch are the ones that do it intentionally... the walking dead hearts........if you nurture a sick animal or plant feed it what it needs a bit of tlc...it comes to life brighter and bigger than before........a hurt person needs maybe a bit of love a bit of tender loving compassion and if you are a good person....that is easy to give........it takes little effort and the rewards......are blessings in disguise..a walking dead heart has no life so cannto be bought back unless they fidn it within themselves first turn to faith maybe, turn to whatever they need to feel compassion if they dont have that gift.....they cannot be loved..because they dotn feel love so they go aroudn hurting people........and destroying others...i have met some it isnt pretty they are mainly locked up in insane asylums medicated..........deb

[SJC2008]

Most people grew up with at least some dysfunction in their family. Some if us got it worse. People do have antenna and are drawn to their counterpart; Abuser with abusee etc. You'lll attract someone with the same emotional health as you. I realized a few months ago that I have a "problem". I get attached to controlling women really fast. The last woman I dated was controlling and God must if been lookin out for me otherwise I'd be with her right not (she wasn't looking for an r). Logically I know she was all wrong for me but emotionally something draws me to her like crack. I hope I can find balance in a R but it seems rare. Either the man wears the pants or the woman. I have no proem leading but I don't want to be a contoller.

[AlexDP]

It might be just me, but I seem to meet/date women who are "Mentally insecure or have been damaged by past relationships" and are looking for a White Knight to save them.

 

I think Men who are successful, confident, strong, and mentally secure will always have success meeting women, because many women are "Mentally insecure" and want a Man who can take care of them and solve her problems.

 

Women are definitely more "emotional" and by reading posts on this forum, many women have been Damaged by Men who have cheated or dumped them.

 

I know that relationships/couples are about "2 people growing together" but I'm tired of meeting women who are "mentally damaged" and carrying their weight and trying to solve their problems, while also having to deal with my own problems. I know its a lot to ask, but it seems like the single men and women out there who are "mentally strong and successful" are very few and difficult to find.

 

I've come to realize and expect that the women out there are "Mentally weak" and its up to guy to do the heavy lifting and become her White Knight Savior. Of course, most Men know this, but I bought into the whole Feminist philosophy and expected women to have their stuff together. I suppose that is why the PUA stuff works, because a Man who can take charge and captivate a 'mentally weak' women will always get laid.

 

Do the Men and Women here agree that its always up to the Guy to be "Mentally Strong" to handle "Emotionally Damaged" Women?

 

The real mentally strong men don't go for emotionally damaged women.

[AlexDP]

I think you're setting yourself up for a world of hurt. People who are mentally damaged are largely making a choice to be that way. They're not looking for somebody to save them, they're looking for their fix of drama.

 

He just likes to think of himself as mentally strong. Obviously he is not, otherwise he would not be going for these women in the first place.

[Archgirl]

The real mentally strong men don't go for emotionally damaged women.

 

Or start whiny offensive threads on LS

[chucksagent]

"Hurt people hurt people"

 

I hate that saying and love it at the same time. Because I think there is a TON of truth to it. But I also agree with what someone else said, ANYBODY is capable of hurting someone and often times DO.

 

But how many of us really have ZERO baggae?? I mean, COME ON!

[jcrew11]

Why would anyone want to be a white knight?

 

You should be with woman to enhance her life, not fix it.

 

I keep getting myself into situations where I start dating girls who I find out to have Depression, taking meds, severe insecurity, or severe social shyness.

 

Now, I realize its a "Man's role and job" to do the heavy lifting and be "dependable and carry a woman" - sure its traditional and mysoginist, but there are many single women out there who are mentally weak or painfully shy and fear rejection. Its up to the Man to step up and become the Alpha Male to 'save' these women from their terrible lives.

 

I used to not think anyone I knew had deep psychological problems, but I just end up meeting more and more women who have deep psycological problems or have been "mentally damaged" from cheaters, divorced, or ex-boyfriends.

[jcrew11]

The real mentally strong men don't go for emotionally damaged women.

 

Where are all the sane, emotionally stable women?

[jcrew11]

Or start whiny offensive threads on LS

 

Or complain that Women are more emotionally unstable than men? Where are all the emotionally stable women? Or is it a Man's fault for dumping/cheating on women and making them go crazy?

 

Women don't respect or want mentally unstable men; so why should any Man put up with a Mentally Unstable woman?

 

Its just one of those expectations of life - Men have to be Mentally Strong and Women are Mentally weak. Its up to the Alpha Man to be able to deal with any Women's mental issues.

[bac]

 

Women don't respect or want mentally unstable men; so why should any Man put up with a Mentally Unstable woman?

 

Its just one of those expectations of life - Men have to be Mentally Strong and Women are Mentally weak. Its up to the Alpha Man to be able to deal with any Women's mental issues.

 

Women are looking for serious relationships. Therefore, being mentally stable is a must for a male. Men are looking for hot, sexy, young females to have sex with. They do not mind ONSs and FWBs with hot girls. Therefore, being hot, sexy and young are most important for girls. No normal male rejects a hot young girl who wants to have sex with him just because she is taking ADepressants.

Edited March 23, 2013 by bac

[soccerrprp]

I keep getting myself into situations where I start dating girls who I find out to have Depression, taking meds, severe insecurity, or severe social shyness.

 

Now, I realize its a "Man's role and job" to do the heavy lifting and be "dependable and carry a woman" - sure its traditional and mysoginist, but there are many single women out there who are mentally weak or painfully shy and fear rejection. Its up to the Man to step up and become the Alpha Male to 'save' these women from their terrible lives.

 

I used to not think anyone I knew had deep psychological problems, but I just end up meeting more and more women who have deep psycological problems or have been "mentally damaged" from cheaters, divorced, or ex-boyfriends.

 

I hear you. It's one of the first things I noticed when I started dating again a little over a year ago. I would sometimes go to my female friends for advice only to find out that some of them are also going through some stuff, taking anti-depressants...

 

I don't know the breakdown, but I often wonder what percentage of woman, people in general are on meds.

 

There seem to be a lot of women out there who are "damaged." Not all on meds, but so jaded that dating or maintaining a relationship is very difficult.

[Mme. Chaucer]

Personally, I think that continuously getting involved with "mentally damaged" people is a sign of a lack of mental strength.

 

Strong, secure people usually prefer the same.

[Feelin Frisky]

There just isn't a one-size-fits-all answer for this. Firstly it assumes that no one ever gets tired, angry lonely, frustrated--all the things that happen to real people who are animals inside nature and not "created" super-being above or outside nature. This kind of assuming that a whole gender or demographic or mass is somehow some ideal group who have a perfect biology and all emotions in perfect proportion all the time is what's wrong with the whole equation where the second part is the person who is damaged goods or emotionally unbalanced or w/e. Everyone is inside nature with a potentially fragile psycho-biology so there is not way to say there is anyone immune to mental un-wellness or emotional disarray. Thus even the seemingly ideal person can loose sleep, eat wrong. stop exercising and so forth because they have everything from toxic people to toxic stresses come into their lives. Today's ideal man is tomorrow's mass murder. We need to factor this even into the gun debate where there is more of this assumption that angry, lonely, tired people are the rare exception when indeed absolutely all of us will be out of sort and out of character at some point in our life. We are not "created" beings with super-software. We're evolved creatures with a bloody origin. There once were people whose job it was to crack a hole in the head of everyone who was still alive after a battle to make sure they were dead--one both sides of the war because there was nothing of any serious medicine to provide. Only in the movies is the central protagonists found by someone looking for them and saved. Just imagine how it would feel to have to skewer those heads. We live in a bubble of fallacy.

[jcrew11]

Women are looking for serious relationships. Therefore, being mentally stable is a must for a male. Men are looking for hot, sexy, young females to have sex with. They do not mind ONSs and FWBs with hot girls. Therefore, being hot, sexy and young are most important for girls. No normal male rejects a hot young girl who wants to have sex with him just because she is taking ADepressants.

 

Where are all the sane, mentally stable women? Unattractive women usually have better personalities but they have low self confidence.

 

I think its a given that all women are Mentally Fragile to some degree. It can be from Body Image issues (Dysmorphia), Bullimia, Anoxeria to Depression. Fights in relationships can start from the tinyiest issue that a Man doesn't care about, but the Woman emotionally freaks out about.

 

I just keep thinking about the Sheryl Crow song "Are you Strong Enough to be my Man" - and often times a Guy enters a relationship with a woman where he has to become a more confident therapist to deal with a Woman's insecurities. Feeling insecure about my own education and career, I've never felt I was "strong enough" to handle a girl's mental problems.

 

That is one of the reasons women prefer older men, because they are wiser and confident and have enough street smarts to handle life's problems, that only comes from older age and life experience. Younger Guys have too much going on in their own heads to worry about a females head problems.

[Estate]

I keep getting myself into situations where I start dating girls who I find out to have Depression, taking meds, severe insecurity, or severe social shyness.

 

Now, I realize its a "Man's role and job" to do the heavy lifting and be "dependable and carry a woman" - sure its traditional and mysoginist, but there are many single women out there who are mentally weak or painfully shy and fear rejection. Its up to the Man to step up and become the Alpha Male to 'save' these women from their terrible lives.

 

I used to not think anyone I knew had deep psychological problems, but I just end up meeting more and more women who have deep psycological problems or have been "mentally damaged" from cheaters, divorced, or ex-boyfriends.

 

This is SO wrong I don't even know where to start...

Only a weak man preys on weak women because they think that's all they can get and feel they have some control being being "in charge" of her emotional state.

 

Whatever the opposite of Altpha... that is it.

 

This is incredible.... "saving a girl", "it's his job"...

You are getting yourself in these situations because you won't go find quality girls.

[Woggle]

Women are looking for serious relationships. Therefore, being mentally stable is a must for a male. Men are looking for hot, sexy, young females to have sex with. They do not mind ONSs and FWBs with hot girls. Therefore, being hot, sexy and young are most important for girls. No normal male rejects a hot young girl who wants to have sex with him just because she is taking ADepressants.

 

I do. One night of pleasure is not worth months of insanity.

[Estate]

Women are looking for serious relationships. Therefore, being mentally stable is a must for a male. Men are looking for hot, sexy, young females to have sex with. They do not mind ONSs and FWBs with hot girls. Therefore, being hot, sexy and young are most important for girls. No normal male rejects a hot young girl who wants to have sex with him just because she is taking ADepressants.

 

That's such a messed up view on life.

[jcrew11]

This is SO wrong I don't even know where to start...

Only a weak man preys on weak women because they think that's all they can get and feel they have some control being being "in charge" of her emotional state.

 

Whatever the opposite of Altpha... that is it.

 

This is incredible.... "saving a girl", "it's his job"...

You are getting yourself in these situations because you won't go find quality girls.

 

Where are these Quality girls you speak of?

 

Every woman that has been dumped or cheated on has Mental baggage, and perhaps that mental baggage is a good enough reason for me to dump them because I'm sick of dealing with their emotional crap. Just admit it, most women are emotionally fragile and its up to the Man to figure out how to manage a woman's emotional state without pissing her off or getting into stupid fights.

[Estate]

Where are these Quality girls you speak of?

 

Every woman that has been dumped or cheated on has Mental baggage, and perhaps that mental baggage is a good enough reason for me to dump them because I'm sick of dealing with their emotional crap. Just admit it, most women are emotionally fragile and its up to the Man to figure out how to manage a woman's emotional state without pissing her off or getting into stupid fights.

 

You must be setting out to meet nutbags or something.

Some people can get over things. It sounds like you are the one with emotional baggage to think so lowly of ALL women.

[jcrew11]

You must be setting out to meet nutbags or something.

Some people can get over things. It sounds like you are the one with emotional baggage to think so lowly of ALL women.

 

Probably. I meet a lot of Blonde girls that are wild and crazy.