Around what age do women start to become less desirable

[Andy_K]

So far I've gotten about 2 actual answers (25 and 30) 30 gives me a little hope but I have a feeling this does not representative the majority of men

 

Note though, that the question was when do looks typically start to decline. Not 'when do you stop being attractive at all'. How fast they decline, and how much of an impact this has, is within your control to a great extent.

 

On the numbers again - the average playboy centrefold is 22. This would suggest an age range of 18-26 is the prime in a purely physical sense.

 

On the other hand, it's dangerous to apply generalisations to yourself too rigidly. An attractive 28 year old is going to get a lot more interest from guys than an unattractive 21 year old. You just have to make the best of whatever cards life dealt you.

[aisle_seat]

You've gotten plenty of opinions already but I'll throw my two cents in. At 44 years old I really am not interested in younger women. Sure, they can look good and I'm not saying I don't admire them, but in terms of having a relationship? Just not interested. I have always been attracted to women my own age, and that goes for when I was in my 20s, 30s and now 40s.

 

I want a woman that grew up in the same time period I did, knows the music I know, appreciates current events in the same age context I do, etc. As for looks, I really appreciate a woman my age who takes pride in looking good but that does not mean artificially (cosmetic surgery - no thanks). Eating right and staying reasonably fit are attractive qualities and I'm drawn to them, as well as having something between the ears.

 

I think the men you're encountering aren't men at all but in fact are boys, not knowing what they really want. When you meet a real man, he'll appreciate you for who you are and what you look like, right now.

[eerie_reverie]

With an attitude as negative as yours, I'm surprised you get hit on at all.

 

Re: the age thing, LOTS of women start "losing their looks" in their mid-twenties or so, but IMO the ones who take care of themselves only continue looking better. In their cases, the years are just more time that they've had to sculpt their bodies and confidences.

[ThsAmericanLife]

To the OP... as Eleanor Roosevelt once said... noone can make you feel insecure without your permission.

 

I'll agree with the other poster and say it is a good idea to avoid men who make a habit of dating much younger women or are opposed to dating women older than them.

 

These men don't value inner qualities much. Not a worthwhile investment in your time.

[thatone]

Yeah, the replies I'm getting are pretty much what I expected (at least from the guys, who my question was mainly directed towards). What age range then do you think would go for someone almost 28? I used to think forties was too old but since guys my age and in their 30s seems to want under-25 I'm figuring I should broaden my horizons or be less picky.

 

if you have nothing to offer but appearance that's always going to be your hindrance.

 

get over the shy/insecure and you'll have no trouble.

[Quiet Storm]

This thread reminds me of something my grandmother (born 1927) used to say, which my parents HATED.

 

She would tell us (me, sister & cousins), that we had to snag our man early because he would carry that image of our youth into his old age and treasure us forever. She said our youthful beauty would bond him to us and sustain his love when our looks faded.

 

Our parents would say don't listen to her. Go to college, get settled and then find a man.

 

She would argue, "But men don't care about a woman's accomplishments! By then you will have had too many boyfriends and he won't treasure you as much!"

 

I ended up marrying my HS sweetheart at 19, but still got educated and built a career along the way.

 

Now in my mid 30s, after three kids, it is definitely more work to stay in shape. I am naturally short and thick, so I have to work hard (weights and cardio). My face hasn't changed much, but I know that's coming soon . My H still thinks I'm hot.

 

It sucks for women, that we are judged so much on our looks.

[oaks]

No, you are not passed your prime when "you think you are." People are acting as if looks do not play any factor into dating whatsoever, which any man can tell you is utter b.s.

 

You're right, looks are important, but I've seen 45 year old women who have, what seems to me, to be a youthful look that I find attractive, and 30 year old women who already 'look old' to me, so I don't think there's a cut-off where people go from looking young to looking old (either individually or for women in general). I also expect my perspective will change as I age (I'm in my late 30s).

 

No amount of confidence is going to magically make me young and attractive. I'm almost 28 and I was wondering if men still found that attractive or around what age men typically think looks decline in a woman.

 

I don't think "being 28" is either attractive or unattractive. Who knows, I might even think you looked too young!

[xxoo]

I think the men you're encountering aren't men at all but in fact are boys, not knowing what they really want. When you meet a real man, he'll appreciate you for who you are and what you look like, right now.

 

Can't say it much better than that!

[Kamille]

No, you are not passed your prime when "you think you are." People are acting as if looks do not play any factor into dating whatsoever, which any man can tell you is utter b.s. No amount of confidence is going to magically make me young and attractive. I'm almost 28 and I was wondering if men still found that attractive or around what age men typically think looks decline in a woman. So far I've gotten about 2 actual answers (25 and 30). 30 gives me a little hope but I have a feeling this does not representative the majority of men. While I agree that attitude and confidence can make a difference, it does not make an undesirable person suddenly desirable, unless they are already young and attractive to begin with and lack of confidence was the ONLY thing holding them back. Please don't feed me platitudes.

 

I now refuse to define my attractiveness on looks alone. I've never been happier.

 

I think your biggest issue is that you define yourself by your looks and therefore fear that loss of looks = loss of power. But really, who cares if you lose your looks (which I'm sure you're not)? That doesn't actually stop you from enjoying flirting and seduction does it?

 

I got more men hitting on me in one summer being single at the age of 32 than I did throughout the whole of my twenties. The difference, I stopped letting my ego get in the way of having fun. I stopped putting so much stock into whether or not men thought I was physically attractive. Before, I would not flirt or hit on men because I was afraid they would reject me, which would in my mind confirm that my worst fear was true: "I am not attractive". I think you have a similar dubious worst fear (that, or you're a male poster trolling for a reaction). Stop paying attention to that fear, stop being so centered on yourself and start paying attention to men. Smile at them, chat with them, flirt with them.

 

Put those three things into practice and come back and report: do you really think men are that superficial? Do you still believe your attractiveness is defined by how youthful you look?

 

 

If you think you're past your prime at 28, you're going to lead a long miserable life. You are never younger than today! So go out there and take advantage of your youth. Make a guy's day by flirting with him.

[laotzu]

This thread is ridiculous.

 

I'm a 29 year-old guy, and I can honestly say: I'm attracted to fit women. It has almost absolutely nothing to do with age, and (here's a secret) this is true of most men. Guys would rather date someone fit and attractive than date someone at a specified age range. More hints:

 

A. Men don't notice "wrinkles" - you notice them on yourselves. We don't care about them.

B. We don't know what you looked like when you were ~23, and we probably didn't care.

C. I'm actually very interested in women around the 30 year-old range who are in good shape, because to me this means they always will be.

 

This is coming from a tall, muscular guy in his late twenties with a good job. I don't go for the really low twenties (my previous fiance is ~26) and, as I said, I'm more interested in trying to figure out how a girl might look when she's forty or so. This is because a healthy lifestyle and fitness are really important to me - so that's what I'm looking for.

 

As with all things, the answer varies. Yes, yes, I'm sure the natural bio-oils in your epidermis start to depreciate around ~25, which is also the year that the proteins in your hair start to lose their luster, and, oh, a few wrinkles appear...

 

It doesn't matter! Workout and stay healthy, you'll have men fawning over you. I'd seriously date a forty year-old partner at my firm, because she's smoking hot and probably will be until she's 60 (and she works-out and eats healthy all the time).

[Kamille]

Another question to ask yourself:

 

What else, other than looks, do you bring to a relationship? Do you have a great sense of humor? Do you offer respect and support? Are you a great conversationalist? Are you a firecracker in bed? Why would a guy be happy to get to know you?

[Disenchantedly Yours]

Sweaterwetherstar, you have to remember that in your early 20s you are usually in more social situations then after you get out of college and join the work force. It's just a different atmosphere. I also think the advent of the internet has changed interactions between men and women and that men aren't being as proactive in real life anymore. Due to Facebook, dating sites and yes, porn.

 

The men that tell you that women of a certain age are only the most worthwhile are not good material. They are not good men. They might be nice guys but they aren't the kind of man anyone needs or wants or that you should even be paying attention to. Guys that say things like "Sorry but women between these ages are the most attractive", aren't telling you that because of truth. They are telling you that because of their own personal issues with women. I've had older men would send me messages while I online dated that cited their own age of interest in a woman several years younger then themselves. If they don't want to be with someone their own age why would I want to be with someone his age? I would email them back and tell them that I was turned off by this and I didn't forsee us having a future. They didn't like that but oh well. I judged them based on the same criteria they judged me, something shallow. *shrug*. A little does of their own medicine. Now, there were older men that emailed me that had a wider age range, sometimes even going over their own, and these men I would give a shot.

 

Futher, keep in mind that agism against a woman is usually breed out of a male's insecurity of his own aging and a desire to control and manipulate women. I've discovered as I have gotten older that men are just as afraid as getting older as women. So many of my male friends have said comments about losing hair and putting on weight and not looking how they use to or feeling their own biological clocks ticking that it has taught me that both men and women struggle with age. I even remember Brad Pitt expressing this same fear in an interview even about how he was getting older and loosing his looks. No one wants to lose their importance to the world. Men age just like women do. And I noticed that people are less interested in movies seeing old men croon with younger costars then they use to. No one wants to see Harrison Ford drooling over a Racheal Adams.

 

We all get older. We all feel it to certain degrees. My dad once told my brother to watch out when he hit 30 because after 30 my dad gained weight. I would never want to be 20 again. Even if I had less wear and tear. Both men and women get older. At 30, men's sperm count starts to dip too! Men know this. But we do live in a world that is founded on male rule that has promoted a lot of fear into women.

 

I will leave you with this. Men that only think women of young ages are worthwhile aren't even respecting those younger women. While a man might admire her beauty he doesn't seee her as a better person then her older counterpart. Because he is judging her based on her age just as he might judge an older woman based on hers. Women are in it together. Young and old. And a man that respects both is the kind of man you need to be looking out for.

 

Next time I see a thread on here about men whining about how evil women are, I think it would be fair to remind them how often women are disparaged for their age and looks. It's tough for everyone in the world and men and women need to learn to value each other for other factors then just height, age or wealth. I actually think this is the key to life. Seeing people as people and not asking what they can give you (because that's based on greed and childishness) but instead asking what you can give of yourself to a man or woman. So when a man regulates a woman based on age or a woman regulates a man based on money, these two individuals are asking what this person can give *them*. Not what they can give that person. And those kind of relationships are doomed from the start.

[Allie32]

I turn 28 in December and am beginning to feel as if I am far past my prime. I've always been introverted and have suffered with low self-esteem, but even despite that, I got far more attention from guys when I was in my early 20s than I ever did 25+. The guy I am interested in (who is exactly my age) treats me like a male friend and shows no interest, when in my early 20s I couldn't seem to have a guy friend who WASN'T interested in me to some degree. And I was just as shy (if not more so actually) and insecure as I am now. I haven't gained a lot of weight and don't think I've changed that drastically physically, but apparently I must have, especially reading various opinions online from men stating that women start losing their looks after 25, and most men seem to prefer women 18-22. Would most men on this site agree with that? What age do you feel women start becoming less desirable? I'm wondering if I should start settling at this point and becoming less picky.

 

 

I don't think there is any age where women become "less" desirable. There are always going to be men out there that never want to settle down and are always looking for the next "best thing". These are not men you want anyway. The guys that only want women in their early twenties are always going to movin onto the next.

 

The idea is to work on yourself and work up your best features. Men are attracted to confidence.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

Age is just a number. There are people my age (37) who take care of themselves and look fantastic and we can pass for 20 somethings. There are people my age who smoke too much, drink too much, don't exercise, complain about life...that **** shows and they look 20 yrs older.

 

A 33 yr old that I am crazy about has been mistaken for a teenager.

 

 

Madjac, what if the 33 year old you are crazy about looked like a 33 year old? Would that be so bad?

[Nexus One]

It's possible for women too maintain their attractiveness when they age. Good examples in my opinion are:

 

1. Milla Jovovich (age 35), http://bit.ly/pCnlby (<-- picture of her at 35)

2. Natalie Imbruglia (age 36), http://bit.ly/oOX3o2

 

I know of Milla Jovovich that she works on her body a lot though in terms of exercise. I think that's the key in general when aging, a lot of work goes into it.

 

I'm 29, and even though men in general when it comes to looks tend to gravitate towards women younger than themselves, I would turn my head if I saw these women walking in the street. I'd probably nearly break my neck if I saw Milla walking in that outfit.

 

Clothes can help, especially if it shows the woman has good taste and class. Milla Jovovich for example is also a fashion designer, so she tends to have an eye for it. Make-up and hair can help too, but don't overdo it, it has to look natural. The moment it starts looking unnatural or overdone, then it actually starts detracting from a woman's beauty. A LOT of women tend to overdo it though, which is a shame. I've seen examples of even young girls putting on so much make-up, that when they smile the make-up cracks on their face.

Also don't get an exaggerated tan. In my opinion women tend to look better untanned anyway. The natural look is the key.

 

Also know this. 90% of the time your natural hair color is more beautiful than a dyed hair color. I've only seen very few examples of women that got dyeing their hair right.

Edited September 23, 2011 by Nexus One

[norajane]

I turn 28 in December and am beginning to feel as if I am far past my prime. I've always been introverted and have suffered with low self-esteem, but even despite that, I got far more attention from guys when I was in my early 20s than I ever did 25+. The guy I am interested in (who is exactly my age) treats me like a male friend and shows no interest, when in my early 20s I couldn't seem to have a guy friend who WASN'T interested in me to some degree. And I was just as shy (if not more so actually) and insecure as I am now. I haven't gained a lot of weight and don't think I've changed that drastically physically, but apparently I must have, especially reading various opinions online from men stating that women start losing their looks after 25, and most men seem to prefer women 18-22. Would most men on this site agree with that? What age do you feel women start becoming less desirable? I'm wondering if I should start settling at this point and becoming less picky.

 

Since you're having trouble attracting men, it certainly wouldn't hurt if you became less picky. And by less picky, I mean more open to the amazing and wonderful breadth of men out there with all their warm and delightful qualities having nothing to do with age and looks.

 

This guy you're interested in? Is he only hot for 18 year olds? Is that where your angst is coming from? If so, then maybe you actually need to be pickier than you are now about the men you fall for.

[Mme. Chaucer]

Oh, dear. This is disheartening.

 

OP. You are NO WAY "past your prime" at 28.

 

As already mentioned, early 20's people are often super social, and that decreases over the years.

 

Also, it's a well known truth that many young men in their early 20's are wildly horny, so they are probably coming onto their peers a lot more than they will be in a few years. This may not be much of a reflection upon the attractiveness level of their female peers.

 

Each person does "peak" at some point, and I will say that when I went to a few high school reunions, I noticed some guys AND women who had clearly "peaked" in high school and were now on an unfortunate path, physically.

 

I don't think that's very common. And, a lot of it has to do with a person's self-image.

 

Personally, I was not one of the "hot" girls in high school, and it took me well into my 20's to realize how attractive I really was. So, I was not carrying or presenting myself as if I were attractive during my early 20's.

 

Late 20's and 30's I really blossomed. I'm sure not every guy was after me ... but I had no problem attracting the ones I wanted to attract.

 

You don't want to hear this - but it really comes from within, unless you happen to be one of the rare, great beauties.

 

There are always going to be women younger and more beautiful and sexy than you are. You need to be the most attractive you can be as YOU. As long as you insist upon following this line of reasoning, I'm afraid you are not going to find out how to be as attractive as you can. I hope you abandon it.

[grkBoy]

I've yet to see an age when they become "less desirable".

 

It's all about how well they take care of themselves. I'm almost 40 and I see women even in their mid-40s who look hot as h311 in my eyes.

[darkmoon]

sex appeal, a dirty laugh, good in bed, not chocolate box cutie but still ok

[melodymatters]

Oh Lord ! I'm 44 and my live in BF who is madly in love with me is 28 ! I get hit on CONSTANTLY at work, it's become a joke around the place that " Melody gets more game than anyone ever has in the 12 yrs they've been in business".

 

I think it's all attitude, warmth, a sparkle in your eyes and a devilish smile.

 

Of course long blonde hair and being a size 2 probably helps matters, but if I didn't have the "sparkle" I doubt I'd get the same amount of attention.

 

Chin up, and smile, smile, smile !

[musemaj11]

A woman's prime age is from 18-26. After that its going downhill.

 

A smart woman will hurry to find a partner to settle with as soon as she comes of age because thats when she is at her most beautiful stage and able to attract the highest 'bidder' while a smart man will hold on until his late 20s or early 30s to find a partner to settle with because by that time a man should already be financially secure thus more able to attract better looking women.

[Mme. Chaucer]

A woman's prime age is from 18-26. After that its going downhill.

 

A smart woman will hurry to find a partner to settle with as soon as she comes of age because thats when she is at her most beautiful stage and able to attract the highest 'bidder' while a smart man will hold on until his late 20s or early 30s to find a partner to settle with because by that time a man should already be financially secure thus more able to attract better looking women.

 

 

Spoken by a man who has no "truck" with any women of any age at all!

 

Dude, are you serious, or are you just trying to bait the smart people here?

 

Really, OP, women do not have to "attract the highest bidder." Finding a satisfying relationship is in no way related to a slave auction for women or men. I swear.

[make me believe]

If you truly believe that you're "past your prime" at 28, then you are most likely projecting a very negative, insecure, and desperate attitude that is NOT going to attract men. I'm 28 and I don't feel like I'm "past my prime" at all! I am definitely hotter now than I was in my late-teens and early-20s. My body looks the same (have always been tall & thin), but I've learned how to groom and style myself in a much better way.

 

And any guy who makes blanket statements like "women lose their looks at 25" is a loser and not worth your time. I think most men in the real world have an attitude similar to laotzu. LS tends to attract a small, vocal number of insecure guys who love to tear women down in whatever way they can. But in the real world, I've never seen a guy turn down a woman who's in shape and decently attractive because she's a couple years past her "prime."

[ThsAmericanLife]

Here are some kick-butt women in the getting 'old' department...

 

Dara Torres. 41 when she placed Number ONE in the WORLD for swimming... beating out her 20-something competitors.

 

I LOVE this woman... and all 'older' athletes!!

 

http://www.zimbio.com/Dara+Torres/articles/29/50+Most+Beautiful+Women+2008+Beijing+Olympics

 

Sharon Stone (plus 49 others over 50).

http://www.stylebistro.com/The+50+Most+Beautiful+Women+Over+50/articles/gkujhDv35FR/Sharon+Stone

 

I'm 47 now. My avatar pic is one of me taken last year.

[El Brujo]

I turn 28 in December and am beginning to feel as if I am far past my prime. I've always been introverted and have suffered with low self-esteem, but even despite that, I got far more attention from guys when I was in my early 20s than I ever did 25+. The guy I am interested in (who is exactly my age) treats me like a male friend and shows no interest, when in my early 20s I couldn't seem to have a guy friend who WASN'T interested in me to some degree. And I was just as shy (if not more so actually) and insecure as I am now. I haven't gained a lot of weight and don't think I've changed that drastically physically, but apparently I must have, especially reading various opinions online from men stating that women start losing their looks after 25, and most men seem to prefer women 18-22. Would most men on this site agree with that? What age do you feel women start becoming less desirable? I'm wondering if I should start settling at this point and becoming less picky.

 

It's not a matter of age, it's a matter of personality.

 

Last Friday night, in fact, I went to a singles meetup where I had a long and very interesting conversation with a woman who I'd guess was in her early sixties (I'm 44). Let me tell you, if she'd have been a year younger than me and if she was my type, I definitely would have asked her if I could meet her again! She was more interesting to me than the five or six Barbie wannabes across the table who were giggling and talking about personal things which would have bored the hell out of me.

 

Moral of the story: if you ARE one of those Barbie wannabes, and if you want to attract better quality men than the jerks who think you look hot, then you should learn to become an interesting conversationalist. If you don't know about the kinds of nuts-and-bolts things men talk about, then you should learn and practice. It's not that different from overcoming shyness, you just have to learn a lot of stuff. Good topics to discuss with men include technology (duh), ways to fix the economy, your plans for the future, and DIY anything. It will show him that you're a catch and not just a doll.